CatLady1
08-09-19, 18:05
Hi all. I've been on and off this forum while I work on my health anxiety, and have been making strides in dealing with it (with help from sertraline).
Over the last six weeks or so, I've started to feel the anxiety creeping back again, and have been battling the fear of bowel cancer. Although I've been dealing with the fears in a 'better' way than with previous health panics (i.e. not rushing to the GP or for private tests/scans; not dissolving into a breakdown where I can't eat or function), it's getting harder to keep this one under control.
At 34, it's unlikely - but there's been such a blitz of recent publicity around the idea that you're 'never too young' to get bowel cancer, that it's continually triggering my fears. Bowel cancer does run in my extended family - my maternal grandmother died of it at a young age (48), and one of my aunts on that same side of the family had it in her 50s, but is now in remission.
I've had occasional streaks of bright red blood on my stool or on the tissue, which I know can be attributed to piles and/or a fissure; especially as I've experienced both sharp pains while passing motions, and itching or burning sensations afterwards. Piles seem to run in my family, and I experienced a bad bout of them in my 20s. I've never been diagnosed with IBS.
That alone would be something I could deal with, but the maddening vagueness of the phrase 'a persistent change in bowel habits' as one of the key symptoms has me spiralling. My bowel habit is all over the place, and of course, anxiety is likely to blame for some of it! I seem to cycle between periods of mild constipation and noticeably loose stools. Frequency tends to hover around twice per day, although every couple of weeks I get a day or two with excessive wind and having to pass small pellets between 6-8 times in 24 hours. The only way I can achieve the 'perfect stool' as per the Bristol stool chart is to take psyllium husk, but I've stopped using that for a few days because I'm worried that it will mask any underlying problem.
I don't think I've lost weight (I deliberately don't keep a scale at home, so that I can't indulge in constant checking and worry about 'unexplained weight loss'), as my clothes don't feel looser than usual. I can't tell whether wanting to take a nap at the weekends constitutes 'fatigue', but I think I'm ok on that front - I cycle to work every day. I do have mild but persistent backache, which seems to have settled in my lower right back/hip for the last few weeks, after months of it being centred on my left shoulder.
What I'm mulling over, is whether or not to speak with my GP about this. They're fully aware of my health anxiety history, and I'm upfront with it about them - I generally trust medical professionals, so long as they've engaged with me and actually address any symptoms I'm reporting. I'm wavering because this is potentially another form of reassurance-seeking, but on the other hand, I fear the possibility of dismissing this as 'probably IBS + piles' and ignoring something potentially life-threatening.
Over the last six weeks or so, I've started to feel the anxiety creeping back again, and have been battling the fear of bowel cancer. Although I've been dealing with the fears in a 'better' way than with previous health panics (i.e. not rushing to the GP or for private tests/scans; not dissolving into a breakdown where I can't eat or function), it's getting harder to keep this one under control.
At 34, it's unlikely - but there's been such a blitz of recent publicity around the idea that you're 'never too young' to get bowel cancer, that it's continually triggering my fears. Bowel cancer does run in my extended family - my maternal grandmother died of it at a young age (48), and one of my aunts on that same side of the family had it in her 50s, but is now in remission.
I've had occasional streaks of bright red blood on my stool or on the tissue, which I know can be attributed to piles and/or a fissure; especially as I've experienced both sharp pains while passing motions, and itching or burning sensations afterwards. Piles seem to run in my family, and I experienced a bad bout of them in my 20s. I've never been diagnosed with IBS.
That alone would be something I could deal with, but the maddening vagueness of the phrase 'a persistent change in bowel habits' as one of the key symptoms has me spiralling. My bowel habit is all over the place, and of course, anxiety is likely to blame for some of it! I seem to cycle between periods of mild constipation and noticeably loose stools. Frequency tends to hover around twice per day, although every couple of weeks I get a day or two with excessive wind and having to pass small pellets between 6-8 times in 24 hours. The only way I can achieve the 'perfect stool' as per the Bristol stool chart is to take psyllium husk, but I've stopped using that for a few days because I'm worried that it will mask any underlying problem.
I don't think I've lost weight (I deliberately don't keep a scale at home, so that I can't indulge in constant checking and worry about 'unexplained weight loss'), as my clothes don't feel looser than usual. I can't tell whether wanting to take a nap at the weekends constitutes 'fatigue', but I think I'm ok on that front - I cycle to work every day. I do have mild but persistent backache, which seems to have settled in my lower right back/hip for the last few weeks, after months of it being centred on my left shoulder.
What I'm mulling over, is whether or not to speak with my GP about this. They're fully aware of my health anxiety history, and I'm upfront with it about them - I generally trust medical professionals, so long as they've engaged with me and actually address any symptoms I'm reporting. I'm wavering because this is potentially another form of reassurance-seeking, but on the other hand, I fear the possibility of dismissing this as 'probably IBS + piles' and ignoring something potentially life-threatening.