Need positive reassurance/support - just started back on citalopram

[Windywel]

Hi all I’ve come to this forum as I’ve heard it’s very supportive. Ive just restarted citalopram as I had a relapse of anxiety and depression. I’m really upset about that as I really hoped when I came off the citalopram in April that it might have ‘cured’ me. I was on it for 4 years for GAD, health anxiety and depression. I had terrible anxiety and depression before I started it (had it for a long time but it got much worse after I got PND after the birth of my 3rd child and then my father got sick with cancer and died. It made a big difference for me and I ended up feeling ‘normal’ or at least what I imagined normal people must feel as I hadn’t really felt that before. Anyway since coming off I’ve slowly gone downhill. Was ok for a couple of months but my IBS got bad again and I started worrying about that and then ruminating about other health things (I have GAD and health anxiety), had a stressful couple of months with external things and then got a really bad stomach ache about a month ago and everything packed up. Got incredibly anxious and panicky and couldn’t do anything for 3 days. Sort of came right from that but the anxiety hasn’t gone away, it’s always there in the background and I’ve bern feeling really flat. I decided to go back on the citalopram as I wanted to be the way I was a year ago.

This is day 5 - first 2 days 5 mg then 10
and it’s horrible. Anxiety has been through the roof since yesterday. Heaps more anxiety attacks, trembling/shaking of legs, weird feeling of burning on arms and chest and sometimes head during anxiety attacks and feeling restless and irritable and agitated. Only slept about 2 hours last night and felt really anxious all day. Haven’t been able to eat much since I started. I went to the doctor today for reassurance. She did say that she thought I should try and push through and gave me some propranolol and lorazepam to take but I’m too scared to take them. I know the Benzos help but I’m really scared of getting dependant.
Feeling really panicky about being stuck feeling like this. So hard to be back here again. Just need some reassurance that this won’t last and it will work again 😔

[Mrsmitchell1984]

Hi Windywel,

I am not on citalopram but I am on fluoxetine/prozac. I am only on day 1.

However, I can complete relate to what you are saying as I came off FLU in April after 4 years and was hoping to be completely better as I had been good for so long. I tapered off really gradually.

However, I had some sad events and the anxiety and depression are back with a vengeance. I am slowly learning to accept that I may have to be on this medication for the rest of my life.

It sounds like you have gone up to dose pretty quick - was that on the doctors’ recommendation? Did you have side effects before?

Really sorry to hear you are going through all of this but it will get better with time and it worked before so it should work again.

Sending you lots of hope and reassurance- keep us posted on how you are doing x

[Mrsmitchell1984]

I was given an anti histamine for sleeping and it really helped. It may be worth asking for this as they are not addictive and can help x

[Mrsmitchell1984]

Did you have the same anxiety symptoms prior to the meds? X

[Windywel]

Yes I had some anxiety which I why I am going back on them but it has gotten much worse since starting them. Intense anxiety plus waves of panic pretty much all the time. I don’t remember being this anxious last time but my husband reminded me that I was much worse before starting them last time so we may not have noticed as much. It’s day 5 of 10 mgs today and still feeling really anxious 😟

[Windywel]

Hi MrsM how are you doing today? I’ve been a little bit this afternoon but anxiety still there all the time just not making me feel so panicky. What was the antihistamine the doc gave you? Has that been helping with the anxiety? Thanks heaps

[Mrsmitchell1984]

I was given Promethazine hydrochloride and I had a really good sleep last night. X

[Windywel]

Ok I’m might ask about that. Do you feel anxious or just depressed?

[Mrsmitchell1984]

Both of them - it’s a horrible place x

[keta]

Hi
i ve been on Citalopram twice , once for about 2 years and then again for about 5 years and from what I can remember the first 3-4 weeks were awful but it got better eventually so there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

[Windywel]

Thanks Keta. I’ve been feeling really down about the fact that I am 10 days in and not really noticing any change in the heightened anxiety yet. Also I have IBS which is one of the reasons why the anxiety got so bad again and I have an upset tummy this morning which is making me feel even more anxious. I’m also just so tired as the nights are pretty bad yet the anxiety makes me feel wired so I can’t sleep ��

[keta]

I know what you mean with the stomach upsets , when I get anxious my stomach starts cramping and I feel urge to go constantly to toilet, it’s awful feeling, that’s how my agoraphobia started.
I hope you only have few more days left of this before the meds will kick in properly and you start feeling better , sending hugs