Finally went out but felt awful......

[allen1989]

I have suffered from crippling health anxiety for over a year now and it has left me almost housebound. I’ve gone from being active, social and and care free to a total nervous wreck. Some days I don’t even want to get out of bed because of the constant butterflies, dizziness and depersonalisation. Today I decided enough was enough and took the dog for a long walk, haven’t really exercised for over year. The first 10 minutes were okay, little bit of nervousness in my stomach and depersonalisation but pushed on. I continued to walk further and further when all of a sudden I started to feel really weak, I just thought to myself well I haven’t exercised in over a year so that’s why and continued. I then stated to feel really awful! Racing thoughts, adrenaline rushes, depersonalisation, swaying, head rushes and eye floaters. I felt like I was going to collapse! My mind was telling me this is it, something bad is going to happen. I felt gone in the head like I wasn’t there but just pushed on, nearly turned back but didn’t. I was out for about an hour and these symptoms lasted for the remainder of my walk. I feel like It’s a small triumph but at the same time feel really disheartened. It’s so scary when it happens, I just feel like I’m going to collapse and die! I now feel really weird and out of it. When will this hell end!?

[Carnation]

I feel your pain allen, I'm going through the same thing.
Do you think you maybe have walked too far on a first try?
Maybe next time, ten minutes, then fifteen and so on.
I had this with shops. First one ok, second not too bad, third was horrendous.
As they keep telling us, baby steps.

[Carys]

I think this is a BIG triumph and not a small one. That was very courageous to take the decision to go out after so long, and despite having anxiety symptoms, continuing through them. The response you avoided was rushing on home the moment the adrenaline/fear responses happened, so yeah, it wasn't comfortable having to experience them, but you know what, you DIDN'T die and nothing awful actually happened. Fear responses happened, that was all, and I think it was probably expected and natural that they did. Accept them for what they were non life threatening physicological responses to facing your biggest fear. I think possibly for the first attempt it was a bit ambitious lol, but I wouldn't say that you should feel at all disheartened and I know you can build on it. Why not plan a 20 minute walk for tomorrow morning, maybe you will have some panic again, but the more you experience it and just ride it out the better your chances of breaking through the fear and having it happen less the following times.

[glassgirlw]

You fought through your fight or flight response. And won. That’s amazing - and you should be incredibly proud of yourself. Yes the feelings were uncomfortable, but you didn’t give in and race back home, you finished your walk. Well done!!! That’s a huge accomplishment! I bet if you keep trying, each time will get easier.

[ankietyjoe]

Good for you for pushing on.

The key thing here is that you keep doing it and accept the feelings.

Yes, it's awful, yes it sucks, and yes you feel like something bad is going to happen........ but it didn't did it?

Take the dog out for a walk every day. It doesn't have to be as long every day, push towards your limit on each individual day.

But keep thinking about that word 'acceptance'. This is where you are right now, but you found the strength to push through. It's a big victory, not a little one. The goal here isn't to immediately feel normal, the goal here is to feel the sensations of anxiety and accept them. Over time your mind will attach less fear to the simple task of walking a dog.

[allen1989]

I feel your pain allen, I'm going through the same thing.
Do you think you maybe have walked too far on a first try?
Maybe next time, ten minutes, then fifteen and so on.
I had this with shops. First one ok, second not too bad, third was horrendous.
As they keep telling us, baby steps.

Maybe, but I just needed to get out and start doing something about my anxiety. It’s literally leaves me bed bound sometimes. I think you’re probably right about taking it easy.

[allen1989]

I think this is a BIG triumph and not a small one. That was very courageous to take the decision to go out after so long, and despite having anxiety symptoms, continuing through them. The response you avoided was rushing on home the moment the adrenaline/fear responses happened, so yeah, it wasn't comfortable having to experience them, but you know what, you DIDN'T die and nothing awful actually happened. Fear responses happened, that was all, and I think it was probably expected and natural that they did. Accept them for what they were non life threatening physicological responses to facing your biggest fear. I think possibly for the first attempt it was a bit ambitious lol, but I wouldn't say that you should feel at all disheartened and I know you can build on it. Why not plan a 20 minute walk for tomorrow morning, maybe you will have some panic again, but the more you experience it and just ride it out the better your chances of breaking through the fear and having it happen less the following times.

Thanks for the reply Carys!

I nearly did turn back but decided to push on as I’ve just got to do something about this. I think it was a bit far for my first time but I DID IT!!. I think the trouble we me is I’m so in tune with every single sensation In my body, things that everyday people without anxiety probably experience anyway. It’s the depersonalisation, dizziness and constant butterflies that really set the panic off but I’ve got to try and push though it, accept the felling.

[allen1989]

You fought through your fight or flight response. And won. That’s amazing - and you should be incredibly proud of yourself. Yes the feelings were uncomfortable, but you didn’t give in and race back home, you finished your walk. Well done!!! That’s a huge accomplishment! I bet if you keep trying, each time will get easier.

I think that’s it, keep on trying. I always have a tendency to dwell on why I’m feeling this way and concentrate on the symptoms. I really am going to try my best this time..... I need to start living life again.

[allen1989]

Good for you for pushing on.

The key thing here is that you keep doing it and accept the feelings.

Yes, it's awful, yes it sucks, and yes you feel like something bad is going to happen........ but it didn't did it?

Take the dog out for a walk every day. It doesn't have to be as long every day, push towards your limit on each individual day.

But keep thinking about that word 'acceptance'. This is where you are right now, but you found the strength to push through. It's a big victory, not a little one. The goal here isn't to immediately feel normal, the goal here is to feel the sensations of anxiety and accept them. Over time your mind will attach less fear to the simple task of walking a dog.

Thanks for the reply ankietyjoe!

Your 100% right, nothing did happen and I need to build on this. I think that’s that’s the key, acceptance! I really struggle accepting all these weird sensation like depersonalisation, dizziness, head rushes etc.....I’m always questioning why it’s happend and why I feel like this. I’ve got to change that mindset and just accept it’s happening and not question!

[ankietyjoe]

It's happening because you have serious anxiety......duh......

Ok so that sounded mean, but seriously. You HAVE the reason.

Acceptance is THE most important skill to learn when dealing with anxiety, it's the core teaching in all anxiety therapy whether it be CBT, meditation etc. If you don't mentally turn the sensation into a problem, it can't be a problem...

[allen1989]

It's happening because you have serious anxiety......duh......

Ok so that sounded mean, but seriously. You HAVE the reason.

Acceptance is THE most important skill to learn when dealing with anxiety, it's the core teaching in all anxiety therapy whether it be CBT, meditation etc. If you don't mentally turn the sensation into a problem, it can't be a problem...

Haha your right, I do have serious anxiety. It’s taken over my life but I need to start Accepting it now. It’s going to be hard and I’ll probably come back on here every now and again but I’m determined!!

Thanks man!

[ankietyjoe]

Something else to consider. Everybody thinks their anxiety is serious, or the worst anybody has experienced...but it's not.

It's your reaction that is serious, and your reaction that feels bad and stimulates more anxiety.

Been there, done that bruh.

[Scass]

You did brilliantly! All that went wrong is that you allowed the feeling of tiredness to escalate into anxiety. Next time you’ll know better x