View Full Version : Daily anxiety
I’ve had daily anxiety lately feeling like I am going mad or run down. I have used meditation but it doesn’t last long before I feel crap again. Exercise wise it’s hard to get out walking in the dark nights. Also I am finding it hard to cut out fizzy drinks?
What is about the fizzy drinks you are finding hard to cut out? Because if it’s just the fact it’s fizzy, you could try buying sparkling water and adding that to juice (the juice where you mix a small amount with water but use the sparkling instead) that’s significantly healthier.
What is about the fizzy drinks you are finding hard to cut out? Because if it’s just the fact it’s fizzy, you could try buying sparkling water and adding that to juice (the juice where you mix a small amount with water but use the sparkling instead) that’s significantly healthier.
Thanks yes I could try that. It’s the sugar as I feel weak without something sweet.
Thanks yes I could try that. It’s the sugar as I feel weak without something sweet.
You will get used to not having sugar and feel better in the long run. Maybe start by cutting down the amount of drinks or changing to something with less sugar. Recently I’ve been drinking a brand of charryade that only has 7 grams of sugar per can rather than coke which has 36 grams or so per can.
ankietyjoe
25-01-20, 11:30
Using sugar for energy is a recipe for disaster, and a self sustaining loop.
It also messes up your adrenals if you're already anxious, leading to......you guessed it.......more anxiety.
Also, meditation isn't a quick fix to calm you down. You don't have a 'dose' of meditation, it's a long term mental re-training. Keep at it and don't judge it by it's immediate results.
Using sugar for energy is a recipe for disaster, and a self sustaining loop.
It also messes up your adrenals if you're already anxious, leading to......you guessed it.......more anxiety.
Also, meditation isn't a quick fix to calm you down. You don't have a 'dose' of meditation, it's a long term mental re-training. Keep at it and don't judge it by it's immediate results.
Yes I wonder if my sugar fix makes me feel anxious each day?
My brother split with his wife so that’s caused me some anxiety as I’ve had to help him find a house. It’s caused me to feel anxious and tense as his ex wife use to help me when I was anxious in the past?
I wish I could feel relaxed each day but I feel anxious in general sometimes for no reason. I have fears of dying which fuels my anxiety as i wonder how long I will be around? Has anybody got any tips?
ankietyjoe
25-01-20, 15:21
Here's a tip -
Anxiety is normal. Anxiety is hard wired into every single one of us, and cannot be escaped from. So stop running from it.
It's the over reaction to anxiety that is the problem, not the anxiety itself.
And we're all going to die, and none of us knows when. So enjoy right now. The only thing that ever exists is this moment you're in right now. Everything else is either memory or imagination.
Yes I don’t respond to the it well like lately I have had really bad anxiety for no reason? The least little thing makes me feel anxious?
ankietyjoe
26-01-20, 12:39
Yes I don’t respond to the it well like lately I have had really bad anxiety for no reason? The least little thing makes me feel anxious?
That happens sometimes. Just let it ride, and do the things you find best to calm yourself over time.
Please remember Nic's warning re posting on contentious threads such as this
"and just for the record if I feel that someone is replying to a post just to have a dig or make a sarcastic comment I will start removing those comments and banning that member from the thread."
One of my ocd’s or triggers is if there is something I need at the shops like some cola if I don’t rush to get it I get a wave of anxiety. Like today I couldn’t find something for my lunch so it triggered an anxiety attack has anybody else had this before? The ocd seems to be telling me I need the item?
So I went to the psychiatrist for my check up today and they have finally decided to offer some CBT psychologist. They said six month to a year wait but it would save me the expensive cost. I spent over £300 private atleast NHS one I won’t have to worry if it only helps 10% atleast I’m not paying £40 a session?
£40 a session is very reasonable. You would be horrified with what I have to pay for my son but it's an important investment if you have the right therapist. It's all about prioritising the really important things in life.
Dying_Swan
29-01-20, 17:25
That's great Phil! Really pleased you've been offered some help. How do you feel about it? I do agree with Pulisa that £40 per session of CBT is cheap. Its often more than double that for CBT, and some therapy is even more expensive. Still, it's a lot of money if you don't have it, and hopefully you'll feel more able to commit to it if you aren't directly funding it yourself.
That's great Phil! Really pleased you've been offered some help. How do you feel about it? I do agree with Pulisa that £40 per session of CBT is cheap. Its often more than double that for CBT, and some therapy is even more expensive. Still, it's a lot of money if you don't have it, and hopefully you'll feel more able to commit to it if you aren't directly funding it yourself.
I would have been happy to continue the old CBT but it was just the cost. My worry was after ten sessions how many more it would take. But yes it’s a victory because for years I have been seeking some NHS help and was always refused I have never had any via NHS since I was 16. I had been often told therapy wasn’t suitable. They also offered relaxation classes but I passed on that as I don’t like group things.
But yes atleast I can wait and perhaps put my mind at ease? I am not expecting miracles I mean it might not work but isn’t it better to be trying than not trying atall? I am unsure how many sessions I should expect?
£40 a session is very reasonable. You would be horrified with what I have to pay for my son but it's an important investment if you have the right therapist. It's all about prioritising the really important things in life.
Yes perhaps it’s different but in Scotland where I am £35-£55 is the price range it sort of varies some are cheaper some more expensive.
Dying_Swan
29-01-20, 19:12
But yes atleast I can wait and perhaps put my mind at ease? I am not expecting miracles I mean it might not work but isn’t it better to be trying than not trying atall? I am unsure how many sessions I should expect?
Well, I think it's good that this psychiatrist is going to refer you for therapy. I'm not sure how many sessions you'd get, but hopefully if it's with a psychologist it won't be subject to the usual limits you get with IAPT. I agree it's worth giving it a go rather than not trying at all. It will take hard work but let's hope you'll find it helpful.
I’ve had more issues with wheelie bins. We have had very high winds and one blew into my garden yesterday and today mine blew over again and somebody brought it into the front garden right at my door now I am worried about the garden. I was already worried about the ground being dirty where in bins were on the street as mentioned before but I always thought the garden was a safe haven and nobody would bring the bin in the garden. Sadly not now my urges to move house are coming back?
I was already worried about the ground being dirty
Seems to me that the ground is always dirty ;)
Positive thoughts
You can move house as much as you want and as much as you can afford (how on earth do you afford it?) but you will take your issues with you and sooner rather than later there will be new problems/germs/imperfections with the latest property. I hope you are offered ACT therapy because it's more effective when you are stuck in a rigid mindset.
That's very kind of someone to bring your blown-over bin right back to your garden for you.
Yes but you have to understand how it affects my behavior? If I get some work done to the house:
New windows, Clean windows, Paint windows a DIY service man puts his tool box on the ground = stress.
Before I never had this worry. If they put on the ground the windows are contaminated the window pole the paint the whole lot. Sure I don’t need to get work done every year but if I do?
You can tell me it’s fine it’s not contaminated I understand for the life of a non ocd suffer to move a bin into a front garden is no worry. The problem i start the blame game I told my partner I never wanted the wheelie bin out due to high winds. The lid has actually broken and we now need to order a new bin so I ask was it worth it?
What I am say is I have had therapy and I am on a waiting list for more now but my worry is no matter what anybody says nobody is gonna make me think that garden is clean? Sure it rains water goes on the ground but for me it’s “forever contaminated “ that’s how it feels. When I go down this path it’s hard for anybody to convince me otherwise I have had that “forever” issue for a number of years. Once I think something is ruined or spoiled I can’t shake it off? So the ocd would limit any work getting done in the house now that’s what my behavior would be?
That's very kind of someone to bring your blown-over bin right back to your garden for you.
Yes but they could have returned it to my back garden sadly my house is open no fence so anybody can walk right in.
You can move house as much as you want and as much as you can afford (how on earth do you afford it?) but you will take your issues with you and sooner rather than later there will be new problems/germs/imperfections with the latest property. I hope you are offered ACT therapy because it's more effective when you are stuck in a rigid mindset.
Yes but can I ever be recovered when I believe something is “forever contaminated” I have been searching for the answer for years and no luck. I explained above how it makes me feel. Obviously if I never thought it was dirty than I would be cured but I don’t see how that’s possible when I have this form of ocd?
Most people just learn to manage their OCD, Phil. It depends what "recovery" means to you but I suspect you will never be satisfied with anything less than total annihilation. The aim of therapy would be to lessen your overall anxiety, relax the rigidity and manage the fears with less panic but being realistic about your goals. I think you are a way off understanding this but is it something you could contemplate or is it not on your agenda?
Most people just learn to manage their OCD, Phil. It depends what "recovery" means to you but I suspect you will never be satisfied with anything less than total annihilation. The aim of therapy would be to lessen your overall anxiety, relax the rigidity and manage the fears with less panic but being realistic about your goals. I think you are a way off understanding this but is it something you could contemplate or is it not on your agenda?
Yes you are right but I hear mixed opinions some people can recover and help others and they no longer suffer ocd or anxiety but others it’s about managing it. Am I being unrealistic to expect to wake up and not worry about bins? I do want some change but it’s very hard. What is frustrating for me is I had a normal upbringing ocd was something I never suffered until atleast late teens/20’s. I remember a time when these worries never crossed my mind I know that’s not the case for some. What I find frustrating is how I developed it at such an older age. I believe it was triggered my life experiences. I mean I will admit I don’t fly due to the stuff i hear on the news I mean I use to fly myself it never bothered me too much but i believe my behaviour is stuff I am learning I Duno where but it’s all about keeping me safe. I do hope the NHS theapry can help
Dying_Swan
30-01-20, 21:07
I also think you're going to have to change your mindset if this therapy is going to help you. It isn't the therapist's job to convince you something is clean. That's your job, with advice, techniques and support from the therapist. It's also not your neighbour's job to magically know you have OCD and are very particular about where you want the bin. If the therapy is going to be beneficial, you will have to take some responsibility for your own issues and recovery. Good luck.
I have been searching for the answer for years and no luck.
And that's the reality. Sadly, nothing said here or on the multiple forums you post on will help or convince you otherwise :shrug:
Positive thoughts
Dying_Swan
30-01-20, 22:45
Thanks Carys :)
I also think you're going to have to change your mindset if this therapy is going to help you. It isn't the therapist's job to convince you something is clean. That's your job, with advice, techniques and support from the therapist. It's also not your neighbour's job to magically know you have OCD and are very particular about where you want the bin. If the therapy is going to be beneficial, you will have to take some responsibility for your own issues and recovery. Good luck.
Thanks.
I am more at the blame game blaming which neighbour touched it and my partner for putting the bucket outside. I am coming to terms with I am in a neighbourhood which takes bins out because a few weeks ago a neighbour put our bucket out after I missed a collection. So this is the issue I fear this bucket issue could cause quite a lot of anxiety some stuff passes my mind but the windows issue in my old house lasted years. I now feel disgusted with the front garden the outside just feels dirty now. I use to go out and do weeds in the garden now that idea doesn’t appeal.
The issue isn’t the bin now it’s the ground I will worry about putting anything on the ground (expect shoes) may be ok with suit cases as I often use to wheel them along the street but anything else will stress me. Don’t ask me why shoes bother me less I have no idea?
You need to move away from the "blame game" because no one else is "to blame" for you not being able to control what people do in terms of introducing perceived contamination into your property. No one else.
You need to move away from the "blame game" because no one else is "to blame" for you not being able to control what people do in terms of introducing perceived contamination into your property. No one else.
Yes I know but it’s hard right now I am playing over on my mind why it happened and if I had moved the bin only issue is that would have caused me more anxiety. Obviously the ground is already dirty but if you remember I said I used two strimmers in my garden as the bins touched the bottom of the garden that’s the issue. Not much can change my mind I will think it’s contaminated now. It’s very annoying how neighbours don’t care and I am beating myself up over the fact I don’t have a fence up. It could get worse they could do it in the future? Even if I ripped all the slabs and stones up I would think that area is spoiled now
You have no right to be annoyed by your neighbours over this, Phil. It's not their job to accommodate your mental illness.
It’s very annoying how neighbours don’t care
Jeez Phil, your thinking is SO skewed! It was BECAUSE the neighbours cared that they kindly brought your bin in for you after it had blown over. I'd have been delighted if one of mine was kind like that. It is YOU who has the problem, and not them.
Jeez Phil, your thinking is SO skewed! It was BECAUSE the neighbours cared that they kindly brought your bin in for you after it had blown over. I'd have been delighted if one of mine was kind like that. It is YOU who has the problem, and not them.
Yes I admit that I do know it’s me with the issue but that’s why I am annoyed because the neighbours don’t know about my ocd. Sure I could tell them all I even considered leaving a note but it’s too late now. I may continue to beat myself up over it one time a neighbour put our bin out without asking so it’s hard to stop them really. They are probably contaminating there door handles ect too. Sure it may seem nice to bring the bucket in I get that but for someone with ocd it’s made my life a nightmare I now won’t want to touch the ground?
They are probably contaminating there door handles ect too.
No they aren't. You think they are and believe they are, but in 'normal thinking' they aren't.
MyNameIsTerry
31-01-20, 12:28
Bins tend to be dirty. Your neighbour did you a favour by wheeling it back onto your property. They didn't wheel it into your kitchen so they something considered normal by everyone. Bare in mind if you leave a note you had better be very careful because you may come across as unreasonable and annoy them. Better to have that conversation face-to-face.
Or change how you think. And as Swan says this is going to be out of hard work you put in or therapy won't work. The therapist is going to be suggesting the same things we are and other than tools & exercises, again which many of us have been suggesting for a long time, they have no tool in their arsenal to change how someone thinks. NHS therapy may be the same as what you have already been having so have a think about why that's not working for you and determine whether it's you, the therapy or the therapist that isn't getting the results.
Those strimmers you talk about are another issue we have discussed about your thinking. Strimmers will be mucky. Grass is dirty. Strimmers could be whirling through cat poo thus are dirty yet you worry the bottom of a bin will make them dirty. This is why you need to be working on retraining your mind to accept what is rational and not listen to what the subconscious is blurting out that may happen.
Bins tend to be dirty. Your neighbour did you a favour by wheeling it back onto your property. They didn't wheel it into your kitchen so they something considered normal by everyone. Bare in mind if you leave a note you had better be very careful because you may come across as unreasonable and annoy them. Better to have that conversation face-to-face.
Or change how you think. And as Swan says this is going to be out of hard work you put in or therapy won't work. The therapist is going to be suggesting the same things we are and other than tools & exercises, again which many of us have been suggesting for a long time, they have no tool in their arsenal to change how someone thinks. NHS therapy may be the same as what you have already been having so have a think about why that's not working for you and determine whether it's you, the therapy or the therapist that isn't getting the results.
Those strimmers you talk about are another issue we have discussed about your thinking. Strimmers will be mucky. Grass is dirty. Strimmers could be whirling through cat poo thus are dirty yet you worry the bottom of a bin will make them dirty. This is why you need to be working on retraining your mind to accept what is rational and not listen to what the subconscious is blurting out that may happen.
Yes that’s true I but atleast if the therapy fails it doesn’t cost me. I maybe mentioned it before about the dirty laundry I have been able to get that under control. I have since purchased a small wash basket which hasn’t caused me too much anxiety in the past I wouldn’t go near one. I also hit some dirty laundry with my sock and I managed to get over it quickly. My point is this use to cause me much more anxiety but I managed to get it under control perhaps there is hope for the bin issue? For example the other bin fell in my garden but it only caused 50% of the anxiety and I wasn’t as worried as it was a new bin. I know the reason I worry about the other bin because it had a toilet plunger in it. I use to use my hands to unblock but this toilet needs a plunger so I have to throw it away. I am trying to tell myself there is a plastic coating on the bin and any plunger was inside not outside. The issue with the bin germs on the street was troubling me for weeks but it slowly went away.
I am unsure where this worry came from. I mentioned before how I worry about my mums bins as she use to unblock the toilet with a bag. So I probably have this worry about my parents house bins or her parents.
I think it would be good if you had to pay for therapy because you would need to work harder to justify and make the most of the expense. You can obviously afford to pay.
I think it would be good if you had to pay for therapy because you would need to work harder to justify and make the most of the expense. You can obviously afford to pay.
I tried that already ten seasons and it never pushed me on. And no I wish I could afford it the minimum wage isn’t that high these days (plus I work part time)
But yes the reality is for some people with ocd they can bleach the ground maybe use some detol and they feel fine. I wish this was me sure that’s a compulsion to clean but I spoke for many years about throwing away if something is ruined. I even think if they brought in a JCB and redid my garden I would probably still worry. But perhaps some day I won’t think this rash as the issue with the windows and wash basket on my bucket old house it now seems a little more rash. It does make me feel slightly uncomfortable but I would say they weren’t as ruined as I once thought. The bins touching the ground never gave me any anxiety atall pre 2018. This is a new theme due to the toilet plunger. But yes the issue is I believe it’s ruined but that’s a theme I have had for quite some time.
To give people an example many years ago my mums house did actually become contaminated by sewage as the pipes burst outside and it came in. This is over ten years ago but my point being they came on and cleaned it serialised it but I never worried about her kitchen and to this day it doesn’t worry me too much. So what I am saying is I seem to have developed this contamination ocd only in the past 5 plus years back when toilets were being blocked this is where my mind has learned to behave this way. Can anybody tell me why growing up I never worried an inch about contamination? I always believed it was developed very early not late teens? Would be interested to hear opinions on that.
The bin got broken in the wind so we had to request a new one anyway which is even more insulting to me as I never wanted it out in the first place with the weather!
which is even more insulting to me
This is ridiculous, insulting ? Grow up Phil, nature happens and its not a personal vendetta. (I never use that phrase actually, as its a bit pointless saying 'grow up' - but I can't think what else to say to someone who takes his neighbours being helpful and the weather being weather as a personal insult!)
Oh, and here's the thing, what you should be aiming towards in your life goals - is being able to be helpful to your neighbours and bring their bins in for them!
MyNameIsTerry
01-02-20, 12:09
This is ridiculous, insulting ? Grow up Phil, nature happens and its not a personal vendetta. (I never use that phrase actually, as its a bit pointless saying 'grow up' - but I can't think what else to say to someone who takes his neighbours being helpful and the weather being weather as a personal insult!)
Oh, and here's the thing, what you should be aiming towards in your life goals - is being able to be helpful to your neighbours and bring their bins in for them!
Exactly. It's in the 'shit happens' category.
I would also look at the 10 sessions you had and ask why it didn't push you on. It's not meant to, only you can do that. If you believe they have to change you then how can any therapy work?
Yes but it wouldn’t be so bad if I could bleach it and feel fine but that’s not the case I will probably never put a bucket on that ground again to clean my windows. Some people with ocd can get relief in cleaning but sadly for me even if I had a new garden it wouldn’t ease my anxiety
So you'll just have to lump it then. There are worse things to cope with and I'm sure you'll soon be diverted onto another pressing issue which affects you. think about all the positive things in your life? You own a house, you have a part time job, you have the funds/ for travel/ leisure activities and you are newly married so a lot to be grateful for?
As for when OCD starts there are no hard and fast rules. Late teens would be a period of transitioning from school to work/further education so a change of routine which can be unsettling/ stressful? My daughter was 10 when first diagnosed with OCD and struggles to manage it now due to intense stress at home. But you won't be interested in her.
Not much else to say other than be grateful for what you have.
MyNameIsTerry
01-02-20, 14:01
Some OCDers can find relief in bleaching but they still have a mental health condition that is pushing them to need to clean for that. And the what happens 5 minutes later? Clean agian? That's how OCD works and it not something to aspire to as many who do find relief are locking into destructive cycles saying how much they hate their lives.
So you'll just have to lump it then. There are worse things to cope with and I'm sure you'll soon be diverted onto another pressing issue which affects you. think about all the positive things in your life? You own a house, you have a part time job, you have the funds/ for travel/ leisure activities and you are newly married so a lot to be grateful for?
As for when OCD starts there are no hard and fast rules. Late teens would be a period of transitioning from school to work/further education so a change of routine which can be unsettling/ stressful? My daughter was 10 when first diagnosed with OCD and struggles to manage it now due to intense stress at home. But you won't be interested in her.
Not much else to say other than be grateful for what you have.
Yes you are correct I do have a lot to be grateful for often I spend that much time worrying I often forget what I have achieved. My sister would moan at it I reflect on the past wedding ect which I feel is unfair
Some OCDers can find relief in bleaching but they still have a mental health condition that is pushing them to need to clean for that. And the what happens 5 minutes later? Clean agian? That's how OCD works and it not something to aspire to as many who do find relief are locking into destructive cycles saying how much they hate their lives.
True if I was spending hours cleaning I guess that wouldn’t be very good either.
I have had urges to sell the house and move the only issue is it could happen again somebody could enter my garden. Many newer houses don’t have fences up so anybody can come in.
Congratulations on your financial stability, then.
Many newer houses don’t have fences up so anybody can come in.
Even those with fences aren't 'immune' to helpful and thoughtful neighbours bringing your bin in for you!
Even those with fences aren't 'immune' to helpful and thoughtful neighbours bringing your bin in for you!
Yes but it’s not helpful the bins don’t go in the front garden infact there is no way round to the back garden from the front so it was somebody being awkward maybe annoyed as it blocked there drive way
So it all boils down to dealing with the anxiety and not the perceived contamination. Can you not see that?
This thread is slowly turning into all of your previous ones because you don’t really choose to read and absorb the advice you are given.
It’s great that you are getting cbt and it’s great that you are practicing meditation.
I thought of you the other day when my toilet got blocked and then leaked over the floor. It was awful, I was so upset. I must have bleached the floors about 15 times. I got way more upset than necessary and I definitely overreacted. But I’ve had to get on with it because I can’t live my life like that. It’s come down to a choice. Do you continue to let it rule and ruin your life or do you start to ignore those pointless urges and learn to find ways to relax and help your anxiety?
So it all boils down to dealing with the anxiety and not the perceived contamination. Can you not see that?
This thread is slowly turning into all of your previous ones because you don’t really choose to read and absorb the advice you are given.
It’s great that you are getting cbt and it’s great that you are practicing meditation.
I thought of you the other day when my toilet got blocked and then leaked over the floor. It was awful, I was so upset. I must have bleached the floors about 15 times. I got way more upset than necessary and I definitely overreacted. But I’ve had to get on with it because I can’t live my life like that. It’s come down to a choice. Do you continue to let it rule and ruin your life or do you start to ignore those pointless urges and learn to find ways to relax and help your anxiety?
Yes I get what you are saying. I think what I am struggling with is the getting on with it part. I do get on with it but I find the notion that it’s forever contaminated on my mind often I don’t even get anxiety. The thoughts pop into my head I can see the toilet plunger and I see the bin like some sort of contamination risk and it seems ruined. I’m not saying I wish I could bleach but for someone with ocd I don’t actually clean that much. It’s more a fear of getting my hands dirty. I probably mentioned it before but when I was 16 I did actually deal with rubbish I did cleaning jobs including cleaning a football stadium and cinema I got hands dirty all be it I use to wear gloves. But I would carry my phone on me and wallet and never thought of washout my hands. So what I am saying what I find most frustrating is how my condition has developed for someone who once never had a fear of bins to now I can’t even touch a bin in the street.
I also often mentioned how the anxiety or ocd symptoms often just “go away”. All be it the ocd not so much now but again my most recent is the dirty laundry I suffered for years and now it troubles me much less. I have no idea why I admit some help on forums maybe changed my view point that dirty laundry is quite normal. It seemed to ease my fears I mean I still worry about it but not to the same degree.
Perhaps somebody who studies psychology will understand my thinking. I have the same issues with flying then one day i will just book a few flights. It’s like a wall or mental block of thinking. I had the same issue with the London Underground I said for years I would use it and one day last year I pushed myself to do it. You would think I would be cured right? No once I do that I worry again. Nobody has quite been able to explain to me why I can read books do cbt and have no effect but one day problems just to away? It’s a bit hard to understand
MyNameIsTerry
01-02-20, 19:43
Yes but it’s not helpful the bins don’t go in the front garden infact there is no way round to the back garden from the front so it was somebody being awkward maybe annoyed as it blocked there drive way
Or perhaps they were being nice by thinking they were helping you? Or perhaps they brought it closer to your door thinking it would be less prone to blowing over because it would be more sheltered?
But even if someone did it because they were annoyed at your bin blocking their drive perhaps you should consider that they should have access to their property without your bin blocking their way. Someone more annoyed might just kick your bin over, throw it in your garden or boot it down the street so you never see it again.
So perhaps it's just a case of a friendly neighbour who sadly is getting blamed because the bin owner has thoughts about contamination?
Yes but it’s not helpful the bins don’t go in the front garden infact there is no way round to the back garden from the front so it was somebody being awkward maybe annoyed as it blocked there drive way
So the bins were returned to the "wrong" spot on your property and this will make you angry as a "rule" has been broken and it's out of position. Maybe the neighbour who returned it has "rules" too and wanted your bin off his pristine driveway?
Just another way of interpreting things?
Yes I get what you are saying. I think what I am struggling with is the getting on with it part. I do get on with it but I find the notion that it’s forever contaminated on my mind often I don’t even get anxiety. The thoughts pop into my head I can see the toilet plunger and I see the bin like some sort of contamination risk and it seems ruined. I’m not saying I wish I could bleach but for someone with ocd I don’t actually clean that much. It’s more a fear of getting my hands dirty. I probably mentioned it before but when I was 16 I did actually deal with rubbish I did cleaning jobs including cleaning a football stadium and cinema I got hands dirty all be it I use to wear gloves. But I would carry my phone on me and wallet and never thought of washout my hands. So what I am saying what I find most frustrating is how my condition has developed for someone who once never had a fear of bins to now I can’t even touch a bin in the street.
I also often mentioned how the anxiety or ocd symptoms often just “go away”. All be it the ocd not so much now but again my most recent is the dirty laundry I suffered for years and now it troubles me much less. I have no idea why I admit some help on forums maybe changed my view point that dirty laundry is quite normal. It seemed to ease my fears I mean I still worry about it but not to the same degree.
Perhaps somebody who studies psychology will understand my thinking. I have the same issues with flying then one day i will just book a few flights. It’s like a wall or mental block of thinking. I had the same issue with the London Underground I said for years I would use it and one day last year I pushed myself to do it. You would think I would be cured right? No once I do that I worry again. Nobody has quite been able to explain to me why I can read books do cbt and have no effect but one day problems just to away? It’s a bit hard to understand
It’s not hard to understand, it’s all anxiety. You’re not the only person in the world ever to have experienced what you are experiencing. You choose what level of effort you’re going to put into getting better, the anxiety doesn’t. The anxiety is also you.
The trouble that is I see it here is an extreme lack of empathy, and a desire to blame everyone else for not following his rules and regulations - combine that with expecting someone else to magically sort him out and I can't see how any therapy is going to make any difference without a huge change in attitude from Phil. As has been commented on so many times, over so many years Phil, the world seems to have to revolve around you entirely BUT without you having any responsibility for anything, for example sorting out your OCD yourself. (Oh and regarding the psychology aspect of things - I gave you my persepctive on that on a previous thread and you threw your toys out the pram as it wasn't what you wanted to hear).
You do understand don't you Phil, that your new therapist isn't there to 'convince you things aren't contaminated'?
I’m glad they thought they were helping bringing the bin into the garden but I disagree. It would be fine if I could bleach it or put some new stones down but nothing will make me want to touch the ground again. Someone came to my door and said our bin blew over luckily I reached the door in time before they came and chapped. But it’s very difficult to control what happens outside the house and what people touch. For me the damage is done as no cleaning will help. Perhaps I may get over it or perhaps I won’t. I still won’t touch my parents car doors after they drove up close to the bin.
Now I don’t want to put new tarmac down outside yet I feel my garden needs relaid. I was worried about the ground outside for some weeks and I was worried if I got any new furniture I would have to send it back if they hit the ground. Ocd cbt teaches you to touch the contaminated thing now if I did this I would think the windows were dirty and I wouldn’t win. My ocd will limit situations. To cut it short anything that touches the ground I will be worried about whether it’s paint a bucket a tool box or shopping. What else can I say the next door neighbour has placed there bin at there front window in the past so perhaps they don’t have ocd to care?
So the bins were returned to the "wrong" spot on your property and this will make you angry as a "rule" has been broken and it's out of position. Maybe the neighbour who returned it has "rules" too and wanted your bin off his pristine driveway?
Just another way of interpreting things?
He puts his at his front window I seen this before so it must have been him. Being honest I would have worried a bit less had it not been the bin which contained the plunger. The plunger is 70% of the worry more than the bin.
If the coronavirus reaches Glasgow, what would you be more worried about? Getting infected by the virus or having the plunger- infused bin contaminating your territory?
If the coronavirus reaches Glasgow, what would you be more worried about? Getting infected by the virus or having the plunger- infused bin contaminating your territory?
The virus may pass but the plunger worry could last years until I move house?
The plunger worry could pass too as some of your other issues have.
The plunger worry could pass too as some of your other issues have.
True. I have thought to myself if a painter or window cleaner touched the bottom of the garden would I worry my answer is no so I don’t quite know why I am thinking as rash about the front garden.
I need help with the daily anxiety too as I always feel pretty awful. I can relate back to my last holiday I was anxious on holiday and never enjoyed it as much. I go on another in a few weeks but I am a bit anxious about the travelling. It goes back to my travel anxiety. I am sick of looking for a blame game diet or fizzy juice or exercise nobody can be perfect. You can eat unhealthy and have no anxiety too. It’s no fun never feeling “relaxed or calm”. Kind of made me regret not taking up those relaxation classes. I guess I am not the only one who never feels calm or relaxed? I hope the CBT can bring the anxiety under control.
FYI..... (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?16020-Feeling-depressed-and-anxious) and perspective.
Positive thoughts
The other day I had it reach the door fast as some people were going to chap my door to say the bin lid is off. It’s being replaced tomorrow so on the street my fear is someone contaminates my door bell by chapping to let me know it’s broken. Surely people have better things to do?
Dying_Swan
04-02-20, 00:20
I'm sure they do have better things to do, but are trying to be kind and helpful neighbours. Most people would be grateful, and your neighbours aren't able to read your mind and know your specific OCD fears. Do you think they are doing it to spite you?
Surely people have better things to do?
Depends on who you're talking about. Neighbors that show courtesy or the neighbor that finds it offensive and posts about it :doh:
Positive thoughts
Maybe you should provide a bottle of hand sanitiser by your front door so people can scrub up before they knock?
Well the bin did get replaced I have no idea what they touched as I was out at work.
Maybe you should provide a bottle of hand sanitiser by your front door so people can scrub up before they knock?
Well when people touch my bins it seems so
My work has been stressful again. I often get anxiety about my breakdown in 2016 I have thoughts like what if I was permanently not sane? What if I was crazy 24/7 and I often worry each time a new stress pops up I worry I am some how crazy or have to be crazy? Despite the breakdown only lasting a week and recovery a bit longer I worry one day anybody could lose there mind? Perhaps I am over worrying and that doesn’t happen often?
Is it possible I could go crazy or is it just my anxiety playing up?
MyNameIsTerry
05-02-20, 13:38
Maybe you should provide a bottle of hand sanitiser by your front door so people can scrub up before they knock?
Don't forget the signs next to the bottle:
'Please clean your hands before you touch my knob'
'If you are inserting your package into my slot please ensure it is not soiled'
:yesyes:
Is it possible I could go crazy or is it just my anxiety playing up?
Phil, by most people's standards you're already several miles past the crazy horizon and accelerating.
My work has been stressful again. I often get anxiety about my breakdown in 2016 I have thoughts like what if I was permanently not sane? What if I was crazy 24/7 and I often worry each time a new stress pops up I worry I am some how crazy or have to be crazy? Despite the breakdown only lasting a week and recovery a bit longer I worry one day anybody could lose there mind? Perhaps I am over worrying and that doesn’t happen often?
Is it possible I could go crazy or is it just my anxiety playing up?
A common symptom of anxiety is fear of going crazy. I think that if you’re worried about it then you probably aren’t ‘crazy’ by “normal” standards.
We’re all a bit crazy though.
Don't forget the signs next to the bottle:
'Please clean your hands before you touch my knob'
'If you are inserting your package into my slot please ensure it is not soiled'
:yesyes:
Yes the issue right now is I feel disgusted with the house and want to move I admit I have had these feelings before sometimes they pass sometimes not. Sure I am not rubbing all my house hold goods over the garden but each day think about “bin in garden with plunger” and it feels spoiled or even if it isn’t really I will still suffer anxiety if anything touches the ground. Despite this I am feeling less anxious about the tarmac outside I have stones in my garden I worry the stones harbour more germs than the tarmac?
I would also like to discuss my toilets at work. I was washing my hands in customer toilets at work few times a shift until Christmas. The toilets then became “out of service” so I had to tell customers they can’t go to the toilet. A few weeks ago I seen the manager let somebody into the toilet it now has a pin code I don’t remember if it did before. If it did my question is can you keep a door unlocked that has a pin code? Or have they fitted one? Anyway the out of service sign was still up yet somebody went in. My work usually sells plungers but they have been sold out for weeks so nobody could have fixed it unless it was an engineer. Anyway this week the out of service sign came down on one of the loos and they are letting customers use the toilet by putting a pin code in. They won’t tell me the pin code so if a customer asks for the toilet I have to say they are all broken and I don’t know the code? Not good customer service?
Anyway there is three opinions:
1: It’s genuine and the toilets were broke and they don’t want customers using them much so put a pin code.
2: They seen me wash my hands decided to lock them with a code to stop me going in having seen it on camera.
3: Nobody exists and it’s actually all a set up to stop me going into the toilet to try and teach me to handle my ocd. (Solipsism)
I know it’s a random topic. But it’s situations like this which fuel my solispism and existence worries.
Also for the record on my old store I use to use the customer toilet and washed my hand whenever I felt like it and never once were they broken or locked
I have been also worrying again as somebody on a DP website suggested the mind is controlled and we have no free will?
I have been also worrying again as somebody on a DP website suggested the mind is controlled and we have no free will?
Phil, by most people's standards you're already several miles past the crazy horizon and accelerating.
Duuuude! You've always been driving the back road to Crazyville but seriously, I think you're getting really close to your destination! :wacko: This is really out there!
Positive thoughts
MyNameIsTerry
06-02-20, 20:09
I would also like to discuss my toilets at work. I was washing my hands in customer toilets at work few times a shift until Christmas. The toilets then became “out of service” so I had to tell customers they can’t go to the toilet. A few weeks ago I seen the manager let somebody into the toilet it now has a pin code I don’t remember if it did before. If it did my question is can you keep a door unlocked that has a pin code? Or have they fitted one? Anyway the out of service sign was still up yet somebody went in. My work usually sells plungers but they have been sold out for weeks so nobody could have fixed it unless it was an engineer. Anyway this week the out of service sign came down on one of the loos and they are letting customers use the toilet by putting a pin code in. They won’t tell me the pin code so if a customer asks for the toilet I have to say they are all broken and I don’t know the code? Not good customer service?
Anyway there is three opinions:
1: It’s genuine and the toilets were broke and they don’t want customers using them much so put a pin code.
2: They seen me wash my hands decided to lock them with a code to stop me going in having seen it on camera.
3: Nobody exists and it’s actually all a set up to stop me going into the toilet to try and teach me to handle my ocd. (Solipsism)
I know it’s a random topic. But it’s situations like this which fuel my solispism and existence worries.
Also for the record on my old store I use to use the customer toilet and washed my hand whenever I felt like it and never once were they broken or locked
I'm going with:
4. A change in works policy that is nothing to do with me since it clearly impacts on all customers. And only certain people are senior enough to be issued with the PIN which means I'm not being left out.
Why don't you ask why they have fitted a PIN and what do you do if the customer asks to use the toilet? They should have issued something to tell staff of the change because it seems like you are not following a new policy resulting in poor customer service too.
So what do you do now re washing your hands, Phil? Staff toilets? Are these more closely monitored by the senior staff?
So what do you do now re washing your hands, Phil? Staff toilets? Are these more closely monitored by the senior staff?
They are past the office so I try not to go that way as wouldn’t want the managers seeing. I have used the staff toilets once I think but not much. I often have to dash over to the supermarket to wash my hands because I often won’t open the door of my house without washing my hands.
So you leave work to wash your hands?
So you leave work to wash your hands?
Yes if it’s on a break or end of shift not during the shift though
Sadly the toilets issue has not been the only thing on my mind I still feel disgusted with the house given the bin was moved to my garden. Now the bin has been replaced by a new one but I still fear that ground is forever contaminated and the thoughts of moving house won’t go away. I am even scared touch the rail coming into my house at the steps as it was close to the bin.
I wonder if I can ever got over this feeling my house is tainted or ruined and I can’t touch the garden due to the wheelie bin being placed there?
Phil, that's not a question, it's a statement.
Phil, that's not a question, it's a statement.
Yes but I worry these neighbours have ruined my house forever even if I move I have to avoid touching the ground.
Your neighbours haven't done this. You have by prioritising frivolities over your mental health.
these neighbours have ruined my house forever
Allowing your OCD to take control of your thoughts and actions has 'ruined your house forever', and not your neighbours. Quit blaming them ! The false thoughts you have make you think your house is ruined forever, which of course it isn't.
You have said similar things about your wife at times; its her fault that you are 'triggered' as she touched a suitcase or other item after touching clothes to be washed (or something like that) and how unfair it was as she knew it would upset you. You've said the same about your Mum, and other people, and have an expectation that the world needs to adapt to you and your mental health needs. No - YOU - need to adapt to the world, to find a way to be able to do what 'normal' people do.
Allowing your OCD to take control of your thoughts and actions has 'ruined your house forever', and not your neighbours. Quit blaming them ! The false thoughts you have make you think your house is ruined forever, which of course it isn't.
You have said similar things about your wife at times; its her fault that you are 'triggered' as she touched a suitcase or other item after touching clothes to be washed (or something like that) and how unfair it was as she knew it would upset you. You've said the same about your Mum, and other people, and have an expectation that the world needs to adapt to you and your mental health needs. No - YOU - need to adapt to the world, to find a way to be able to do what 'normal' people do.
Yes I agree with you that it’s me who was the issue. I have had similar thoughts before. The difficult bit is for me to find a what to do what others do without the worrying that’s the problem trying to find out what. All I can say is I have cut back on the replacing that I use to do.
I think that the more that you try to conform to what so-called "neuro normal" people do, the more stressed you will be.
Do you talk about your contamination fears with your wife? Sharing the "load" may help you come up with some sort of a compromise and there may be some "rules" you could both draw up to help you cope when there are triggers (as in most days). Talking about your anxieties with a loved one may be more beneficial than sharing them on here in a virtual world of internet strangers?
I think that the more that you try to conform to what so-called "neuro normal" people do, the more stressed you will be.
Do you talk about your contamination fears with your wife? Sharing the "load" may help you come up with some sort of a compromise and there may be some "rules" you could both draw up to help you cope when there are triggers (as in most days). Talking about your anxieties with a loved one may be more beneficial than sharing them on here in a virtual world of internet strangers?
She hears about my worries but as she doesn’t suffer ocd she doesn’t understand much so doesn’t get why I would worry so talking doesn’t work same with my other family it they don’t suffer ocd nobody gets it
So your wife wouldn't be prepared to listen to you describe how the fear overwhelms you? What does she do when you are in the middle of a panic? Or maybe she doesn't see/know?
So your wife wouldn't be prepared to listen to you describe how the fear overwhelms you? What does she do when you are in the middle of a panic? Or maybe she doesn't see/know?
I usually hide any panic from her. She does listen but she gets quite moody about it. Her family are the same I have had some ocd and they have went very moody with me and her family often lost the head which isn’t ideal. I think my partner takes it from them all be it she doesn’t lose the head as much.
So she sees it as an inconvenience and the others just get angry? Do you have any close friends you can talk to?
So she sees it as an inconvenience and the others just get angry? Do you have any close friends you can talk to?
No they don’t know either. My sister knows but she doesn’t understand much either. So yes often limited to forums as nobody understands my worries
My daughter has the same type of worries as you but she can talk to me so this can help to share the load. She doesn't blame anyone else though but will attempt to control everyone else's hygiene habits and has developed ways to limit direct contact with "dodgy" household stuff. Next door has a rat infestation thanks to a recent extension botched job so there has been much panic....
My daughter has the same type of worries as you but she can talk to me so this can help to share the load. She doesn't blame anyone else though but will attempt to control everyone else's hygiene habits and has developed ways to limit direct contact with "dodgy" household stuff. Next door has a rat infestation thanks to a recent extension botched job so there has been much panic....
I never suffered ocd much when I was younger that’s maybe why I hide it. I would rather it would conveniently go away which it has sometimes but it’s a daily battle with the thoughts. I suffer a daily anxiety which I believe is the cause of the ocd I’ve been unable to shift the anxiety. I have not felt chilled out in quite some time.
Dying_Swan
08-02-20, 01:32
I think a lot of us probably hide our anxiety, because it *is* hard for others to understand if they've never had it. Still, it might be helpful for you to confide in someone you trust in your personal life. With my close friends I just laugh about it now, as we know each other's eccentricities and quirks. You might be surprised and find that others you know experience similar problems. We'd all love our anxiety just to go away but the nature of the beast is that you have to work at it.
Don't you just!
You are of a generation where anxiety is very "acceptable" so it's sad that you don't have support or understanding from your immediate family. I remember you saying that your Mum once said that you'd never make anything from your life which I thought was very cruel and I'm sure she regrets her words now. I hope your wife soon realises that she can help play a part in making things more manageable for you. Just knowing she is supporting you and not angry with you because she doesn't understand you and your behaviours would be a start.
Yes it is frustrating the lack of support.
Once I get rid of the bin worry my head switches to my fear of flying, work stress and Facebook worries. I posted then and before I did manage to book a trip to France and Switzerland but by train. So not quite tackling my flying fear. Again the birthday night out I have worried about posting on Facebook In fears if spoke to the singers before In the past or I worry about people seeing my partners age despite the fact I don’t have to title the album with anything special..
Also on my mind is my brothers marriage as he split from his wife I have felt guilty as I told him about a dating site which seems to have encouraged but he wasn’t happy with his wife
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-51433720
4 hours london to New York this would make life easier for me if there was wind every day
Dying_Swan
09-02-20, 16:07
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-514337204 hours london to New York this would make life easier for me if there was wind every dayReally? I wouldn't want to be flying in this weather! Obviously they know what they're doing and think it's safe, or they'd cancel the flight, but I'd find it terrifying. If you could do a 5-hour hop to New York, what about a shorter one to Europe? It seems like you have the same worries playing in a loop: flying, contamination, Facebook, solipsism, and work. What about working on them one at a time instead of worrying about them all at once?
Really? I wouldn't want to be flying in this weather! Obviously they know what they're doing and think it's safe, or they'd cancel the flight, but I'd find it terrifying. If you could do a 5-hour hop to New York, what about a shorter one to Europe? It seems like you have the same worries playing in a loop: flying, contamination, Facebook, solipsism, and work. What about working on them one at a time instead of worrying about them all at once?
I feel I have to tackle them all at once. My plan was to fly to Dublin but I have delayed that. Perhaps the good thing is I am confident to take the train round Europe so I’m atleast still get a good holiday. I have been pondering why I don’t fly for some time but can’t figure it. Even if I did beat one another could come along. I wish I never had the Facebook worries but I do. I worry about who I add and what I post I over analyse it what’s annoying as I never use to worry about it as much.
Dying_Swan
09-02-20, 17:50
I guess the problem with trying to tackle things all at once is that its easy to end up not tackling any of them and then going round and round in circles. Perhaps you'd find it easier to decide what is most important and focusing on that.
I doubt whether you can prioritise your worries though? They just blend into each other and play in a loop in your mind?
I know Facebook is very important to you even though you hate it and just get grief from it. I presume you use it to manage FOMO? Could you bring yourself to temporarily disable it for a short time and see how you cope? You don't need to announce your daily activities on it or tout for praise or reassurance. People who are content with their lives don't to use it for justification and it's so easy to misunderstand comments without a visual prompt. Also you must be very vulnerable to facebook trolls so what is the point? Are you only able to talk about things which worry you online?
I doubt whether you can prioritise your worries though? They just blend into each other and play in a loop in your mind?
I know Facebook is very important to you even though you hate it and just get grief from it. I presume you use it to manage FOMO? Could you bring yourself to temporarily disable it for a short time and see how you cope? You don't need to announce your daily activities on it or tout for praise or reassurance. People who are content with their lives don't to use it for justification and it's so easy to misunderstand comments without a visual prompt. Also you must be very vulnerable to facebook trolls so what is the point? Are you only able to talk about things which worry you online?
Yes I could disable it to be honest I don’t post much anymore it’s more holidays or nights out I post. Not many people post either now but there is the odd one who posts a life story and no I often debate politics on Facebook rather than worries. What does FOMO mean? And luckily I don’t get much trolling on Facebook more message boards. I do focus on Facebook a lot even though I don’t use it much i read it more than I post. Often if I see other people doing fancy things I do feel pressure to do the same.
I have suffered trolling on another message board people blaming me for recommending a dating site to my brother.
Dying_Swan
09-02-20, 18:51
You're not responsible for your brother Phil. He's an adult and makes his own decisions.
You're not responsible for your brother Phil. He's an adult and makes his own decisions.
Yes that’s true people tried to make me feel responsible on forums as I asked if I did the right thing.
I also feel bad about not flying but I spoke about it before and people said it’s ok to not fly as they don’t like it. I wish I could some just enjoy what I do as I always question it. I follow lots of travel bloggers who tour Europe solely by rail so that gives me some influence.
You lay yourself open to nasty comments by asking for justification of your actions. Maybe hold back and have more confidence in your own decisions? Otherwise trolls will exploit your insecurities.
Who cares if you don't like flying? Who is pressurising you to fly (other than yourself)? Eurostar has just announced some new destinations-it's a great way to travel and a very ethical option these days. You could fly all over the world and still be utterly miserable and plagued with anxiety. There is no "rule book" in life..you make your own rules which is half the problem because I expect being told what to do would be helpful?
You lay yourself open to nasty comments by asking for justification of your actions. Maybe hold back and have more confidence in your own decisions? Otherwise trolls will exploit your insecurities.
Who cares if you don't like flying? Who is pressurising you to fly (other than yourself)? Eurostar has just announced some new destinations-it's a great way to travel and a very ethical option these days. You could fly all over the world and still be utterly miserable and plagued with anxiety. There is no "rule book" in life..you make your own rules which is half the problem because I expect being told what to do would be helpful?
You are correct it’s only me who pressures myself. I have been feeling guilty about everything lately and I have worried I wouldn’t make the right choice. It spells from when I took my first flat and regretted moving to that area ever since I worried I had to over think before making choices. When I moved jobs I thought it over and over again. I just wish I could have some belief in my choices. I want to feel “content” being honest I have never felt that since pre marriage days. About 27/28 when I worked never had to pay bills never had to worry about big life choices I could just relax and enjoy a weekend away down in England. Gone are those days but I am going my first holiday in England since 2016/2017 so perhaps I will try and be easy on myself? I have been setting unrealistic goals to save for early retirement too which has been adding more pressure. Like I say I can remember a time when I cared less. Some people chill more in there 30’s I worry more and feel more pressure that’s why I miss my 20’s..
That’s all part of growing up really. You have to try and enjoy the present, and plan things to look forward to in the future. Dwelling on the past never helped any of us much either.
Having more responsibility puts additional pressure on our already overworked brains. No need to worry or plan for early retirement in your 30s.Why not make your current job your priority and concentrate on doing your best to create a good impression? Look forward to your break in England and as Scass says, plan for a few things to do this year with your wife? Making decisions together may take some of the pressure off you?
Having more responsibility puts additional pressure on our already overworked brains. No need to worry or plan for early retirement in your 30s.Why not make your current job your priority and concentrate on doing your best to create a good impression? Look forward to your break in England and as Scass says, plan for a few things to do this year with your wife? Making decisions together may take some of the pressure off you?
She never knows what to do always let’s me decide. What could be causing my recent guilt about everything? I fear my brothers marriage ending has made me doubt everything I do. At first I was unfazed but I said the same about my job at first it was exciting and then it soon became challenging? I wonder how I can get back to being more laid back is that possible with an anxiety condition?
It’s a shame I feel disgust with my garden now too. I have tried to battle this bin issue but the garden feels tainted and I don’t like it anymore. I can’t bear touching the ground as I enter my house I just feel sadness now about the garden. This is how it makes me feel. I struggle to see how I can change this?
Anybody help I feel disgusted with the garden? I seen neighbours with there wheelie bin at there front door but that doesn’t make me feel better. I think what gets me is it once contained a plunger
What does the plunger mean to you? What does it represent?
What does the plunger mean to you? What does it represent?
It means germs and toilet germs. It means stuff becomes forever contaminated and spoiled. I see it as worse than the actual bin germs..like even if I replace my whole garden only way to escape it is move house. I could cope with the germs on the street but at my front door it’s making me very anxious..
My mum also touches bins regularly and never washes my hands really stresses me out these bin situations..
Generally once I believe something is forever contaminated I wont touch it. This ranges from blind chords to door handles to windows whatever it is I worry about. My only escape is to move house or replace them item. I try and tell myself the plunger which was in the bin was protected by plastic at the bottom it wasn’t direct but that doesn’t reassure me much. It seems mad as if it was the plunger direct that touched it well..now I seen neighbours get new toilets and the old one is thrown outside on the stones or garden this would also freak me out just as much due to the toilet water
How can I deal with the disgust of my front garden? Now the wheelie bin was there it feels tainted horrible and I want to move. It use to feel clean now the garden seems dirty?
nomorepanic
23-02-20, 22:44
ignore it
glassgirlw
24-02-20, 00:19
How can I deal with the disgust of my front garden? Now the wheelie bin was there it feels tainted horrible and I want to move. It use to feel clean now the garden seems dirty?
this sounds a lot like an OCD/Cleanliness issue. Have you looked into any therapy for the OCD side of this? I’m assuming it applies in other areas of your life and not just your garden?
How can I deal with the disgust of my front garden?
Dig everything up and lay down concrete. This way you can bleach and spray wash to your heart's content. A lot cheaper than moving house ;)
Positive thoughts
I am still finding it hard to cut out the fizzy drinks. Often on trains I feel anxiety perhaps the fizzy drinks like cola are a possible me cause? I am finding it hard to cut it out though ?
You overthink things Phil.
Have you tried sparkling water instead?
You overthink things Phil.
Have you tried sparkling water instead?
Nope not tried that.
I have been trying to drink bottled water but not sparking. Orange juice seems to give me a sore stomach so can’t drink much of it
Well I managed to clean my windows the pole maybe hit the ground once but I tried to tell myself my shoes touch the ground and come inside. However my compulsion was to move my rucksack and iPad upstairs bad news is I never shut the bedroom door so my urge was to replace the ipad and camera again. Now I done that not long ago but that’s the problem I only managed to suffer mild anxiety about the ground but it triggered more ocd so when people say exposure therapy how does it work when it simply makes me worry more about other stuff?
How safe is it to go to Europe with the Coronavirus? I may have to waste thousands of pounds on a holiday due to anxiety about catching the virus? If I do perhaps so would have an awful time just worrying?
Update Virus has hit Scotland worrying news
I don't think coronavirus would penetrate your anti contamination measures, Phil. You're probably the most well protected man in Scotland.
Pulisa's right - I bet the virus is more afraid of you than you are of it ;)
I don't think coronavirus would penetrate your anti contamination measures, Phil. You're probably the most well protected man in Scotland.
I wash my hands a lot but I honestly don’t believe it will help. My fear it’s it’s airborne. I’m not into buying hand sanitizer
It hasn't HIT Scotland, there is ONE case in a man who returned from Italy.
I had a photo of where the wheelie bin was placed however I have lost the photo having got a new phone. I now worry my safe steps where the bin couldn’t reach could be dirty. I know in my head where the bin was placed and it was near my window but my ocd is worried as I have no photo now?
I don't think coronavirus would penetrate your anti contamination measures, Phil. You're probably the most well protected man in Scotland.
:emot-giggle::emot-giggle::emot-giggle:
This made me laugh P
I am still finding it hard to cut out the fizzy drinks. Often on trains I feel anxiety perhaps the fizzy drinks like cola are a possible me cause? I am finding it hard to cut it out though ?
Cola is a stimulant and any stimulant can trigger (and worsen) anxiety. But reading through your recent OCD bin/garden from hell posts, Phil, I'd say this is the least of your worries...:huh:
My mum brought a carrier back into my house today I believed she touched her bins whilst holding the bag. My worry is the ground is contaminated I have these worries often. I have worried about the garden for a year since the wheelie bin was placed in my garden. The good news is the bag she touched was wrapped in two other bags as it was raining today so maybe the bag was clean but because she never washed her hands. It was a present for someone so I know it will go to someone else’s house and go on someone else’s ground but I worry about my own house?
glassgirlw
01-11-20, 02:32
I have worried about the garden for a year
What steps are you taking to combat the ocd and anxiety?
Phil we have had the same issues with this bin,letterbox for years you were I believe seeking some therapy,what’s happened?5206
Get one of these bins but just leave it inside so only you can touch it.:D
Hope your wife is well.
My mum brought a carrier back into my house today I believed she touched her bins whilst holding the bag. My worry is the ground is contaminated I have these worries often. I have worried about the garden for a year since the wheelie bin was placed in my garden. The good news is the bag she touched was wrapped in two other bags as it was raining today so maybe the bag was clean but because she never washed her hands. It was a present for someone so I know it will go to someone else’s house and go on someone else’s ground but I worry about my own house?
Where my brother lives, there is a lady who used to walk around wrapped in plastic from head to toe. Like you she had a severe case of the contaminations with OCD. She got better though Phil.
I have OCD but I'm a functional OCDer. Fire 'n' thoughts (both sound like f's cus of a slight lisp) that's me. I've had dalliances with contamination in the past but nothing on your scale. I'm usually able to reel myself back in, and in that sense I'm fortunate.
I know I can be blunt, but I want you to know that I'm rooting for you - even if you don't think I am. Which is why I keep coming back, like an annoying fly.
What are you doing to combat this? This isn't accusatory. It's a genuine question.
I can't leave the house without doing my checks God knows how many times. My anxiety is orbital at the moment so this means more checks and me starting to remove plugs that's I'd usually leave in. The positive is that tramping up and down the stairs is helping to keep me fit. :yesyes: I know there's no point in asking you what is the worst that could happen if you were to lie down on the garden floor because I can't open my door and walk out without having done my checks at least 3 times. I've often thought it though. What would happen if I did the one check (which everybody should do) and simply walked out the door? :unsure:
But then there was that time when I made my brother turn the car around and drive 40 miles because I convinced myself I'd left my hair straighteners on, so, yeah, my brain would probably melt. :emot-drool:
I should probably get some therapy but it's so way down on my list of mental shite that I'll probably won't bother. You, however... need to be in therapy.
How does your wife cope with your OCD?
Phil we have had the same issues with this bin,letterbox for years you were I believe seeking some therapy,what’s happened?5206
Get one of these bins but just leave it inside so only you can touch it.:D
Hope your wife is well.
Yes you are correct I have been battling this for some time. The letter box well I got a new door so the worry eventually went away anyway. But it always moves on to something else. I even moved my sofa over a little to hide the bit it touched. It touched side of sofa but I only worried about the floor.
Where my brother lives, there is a lady who used to walk around wrapped in plastic from head to toe. Like you she had a severe case of the contaminations with OCD. She got better though Phil.
I have OCD but I'm a functional OCDer. Fire 'n' thoughts (both sound like f's cus of a slight lisp) that's me. I've had dalliances with contamination in the past but nothing on your scale. I'm usually able to reel myself back in, and in that sense I'm fortunate.
I know I can be blunt, but I want you to know that I'm rooting for you - even if you don't think I am. Which is why I keep coming back, like an annoying fly.
What are you doing to combat this? This isn't accusatory. It's a genuine question.
I can't leave the house without doing my checks God knows how many times. My anxiety is orbital at the moment so this means more checks and me starting to remove plugs that's I'd usually leave in. The positive is that tramping up and down the stairs is helping to keep me fit. :yesyes: I know there's no point in asking you what is the worst that could happen if you were to lie down on the garden floor because I can't open my door and walk out without having done my checks at least 3 times. I've often thought it though. What would happen if I did the one check (which everybody should do) and simply walked out the door? :unsure:
But then there was that time when I made my brother turn the car around and drive 40 miles because I convinced myself I'd left my hair straighteners on, so, yeah, my brain would probably melt. :emot-drool:
I should probably get some therapy but it's so way down on my list of mental shite that I'll probably won't bother. You, however... need to be in therapy.
How does your wife cope with your OCD?
My wife doesn’t understand it much and I have done CBT ten sessions focused on this. I also went for a CBT session this year but they never got back to me. I mean I use to have awful worries about dirty washing but I worry a bit less now. My ocd is about 90% focused on bin germs right now. But what am I doing I am trying to tell myself the plastic bag can protect it as it was inside and also it wasn’t in the bin. My mum brings other stuff to my house if I don’t see her touch the bin I don’t worry only when I see it happen. People have said to disinfect it well I could try but often with these worries it doesn’t make any difference. I have my good days and bad days sometimes I worry more than others. I wish I knew a better solution. I found the exposure therapy a little difficult.
I found the exposure therapy a little difficult.
Exposure therapy, I think, is the best way to overcome anything which we fear. However, this means ramping up the anxiety levels and them staying high for a considerable amount of time.
How long did you give it?
Exposure therapy, I think, is the best way to overcome anything which we fear. However, this means ramping up the anxiety levels and them staying high for a considerable amount of time.
How long did you give it?
I struggled from the start I just found it hard to touch bins.
Problem I find is these ideas become stuck in my head when something is forever contaminated the only way I get relief is to replace it in the past it’s been to move house. It felt good then a new ocd came along and I can’t keep moving. I try and tell myself the item was in a new bag so it had protection and also the item never came from the bin it was only touched after touching a bin. But my ocd still just sees it as her bin germs on my floor and that area being ruined. I will now avoid it and I Duno how I will cope. I mean I have hoovered the area and it that doesn’t bother me too much. It’s the idea of placing something in the area affected
I am finding it hard to get it out my head now the floor is dirty. Even replacing the floor isn’t enough I worry it’s forever contaminated?
I struggled from the start I just found it hard to touch bins.
Exposure is always going to be tough to be begin with. It has to be a very gradual thing but it's really important not to give up at the first hurdle.
Keep trying Phil. If 'plastic lady' got better, I'm sure you can too. It's going to be hard. You're not going to be able to touch a bin, and it feel ok, without putting in some serious time and effort.
You can't control OCD by moving house or ripping up your garden. It will follow you no matter what lengths you go to in order to avoid things. These are temporary fixes - as you've discovered.
Where my brother lives, there is a lady who used to walk around wrapped in plastic from head to toe. Like you she had a severe case of the contaminations with OCD. She got better though Phil.
I have OCD but I'm a functional OCDer. Fire 'n' thoughts (both sound like f's cus of a slight lisp) that's me. I've had dalliances with contamination in the past but nothing on your scale. I'm usually able to reel myself back in, and in that sense I'm fortunate.
I know I can be blunt, but I want you to know that I'm rooting for you - even if you don't think I am. Which is why I keep coming back, like an annoying fly.
What are you doing to combat this? This isn't accusatory. It's a genuine question.
I can't leave the house without doing my checks God knows how many times. My anxiety is orbital at the moment so this means more checks and me starting to remove plugs that's I'd usually leave in. The positive is that tramping up and down the stairs is helping to keep me fit. :yesyes: I know there's no point in asking you what is the worst that could happen if you were to lie down on the garden floor because I can't open my door and walk out without having done my checks at least 3 times. I've often thought it though. What would happen if I did the one check (which everybody should do) and simply walked out the door? :unsure:
But then there was that time when I made my brother turn the car around and drive 40 miles because I convinced myself I'd left my hair straighteners on, so, yeah, my brain would probably melt. :emot-drool:
I should probably get some therapy but it's so way down on my list of mental shite that I'll probably won't bother. You, however... need to be in therapy.
How does your wife cope with your OCD?
The lady dressed in plastic you mentioned has just reminded me of one of the teachers at one of the schools I attended back in the mid-80s who used to wear a blue long-length plastic raincoat outdoors all the time, even when it wasn't actually raining, which looking back on now seemed really odd.
I vividly remember that particular raincoat she used to wear emitting a high-pitched squeaking sound whenever anything scratched up against it due to a very fine texture embossed on the fabric, which really used to irritate the hell out of me!
We hardly ever seem to see those types of garments anymore, thank God!!
That reminds me of my school days when going on an excursion there was a bloke in the park with a yellow raincoat on it was odd because it was quite a warm day as it happened he turned out to be a Flasher :D our teacher loaded us all up back on the bus while she phoned the fuzz,from memory it wasn’t worth flashing as his package certainly wasn’t meat and 2 veg more like a chipotle and 2 peas :D
The lady dressed in plastic you mentioned has just reminded me of one of the teachers at one of the schools I attended back in the mid-80s who used to wear a blue long-length plastic raincoat outdoors all the time, even when it wasn't actually raining, which looking back on now seemed really odd.
I vividly remember that particular raincoat she used to wear emitting a high-pitched squeaking sound whenever anything scratched up against it due to a very fine texture embossed on the fabric, which really used to irritate the hell out of me!
We hardly ever seem to see those types of garments anymore, thank God!!
I was made to wear one of those Kagools in the 70s. Bloody awful things. Mine was canary yellow. :whistles: (not my choice) There is a photograph of me wearing the thing somewhere, and I look miserable. To be fair, I always look miserable in photographs, but I looked extra-miserable because I was having to wear this nasty garment. :unsure:
Teachers were a daily source of sensory irritation for me..
I used to look at the floor a lot (to avoid eye contact) so I saw a lot of shoes and feet. Some shoes were aesthetically pleasing but not auditory, and vice versa. Occasionally, I'd hit the jackpot and get both. Yay! However, Miss Jones - the cow who humiliated me in front of the entire class - wore brown sandals which squeaked and she had the ugliest feet I've ever seen. But this was still preferable to looking at her face.:huh:
That reminds me of my school days when going on an excursion there was a bloke in the park with a yellow raincoat on it was odd because it was quite a warm day as it happened he turned out to be a Flasher :D our teacher loaded us all up back on the bus while she phoned the fuzz,from memory it wasn’t worth flashing as his package certainly wasn’t meat and 2 veg more like a chipotle and 2 peas :D
We had a flasher when I was at high school. I never saw him, but he flashed several girls in my year. I don't know what reaction the dude was expecting but apparently these girls took the piss and laughed like a pack of Hyenas at the sight of his dinky-donk. :roflmao:
We had a flasher when I was at high school. I never saw him, but he flashed several girls in my year. I don't know what reaction the dude was expecting but apparently these girls took the piss and laughed like a pack of Hyenas at the sight of his dinky-donk. :roflmao:
Most 'experts' believe that paedos and pervs are not really any more prevalent today than in those mythical good ol' days when there was allegedly 'no such thing as crime and violence'!
They reckon we're often disproportionately more paranoid now than ever before, possibly due to greater awareness, and of course, the Internet/social media, which often amplifies the threats all the more.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not in any way attempting to trivialise such issues, and such evil scumbags really do deserve to face the full force of the law.
I was made to wear one of those Kagools in the 70s. Bloody awful things. Mine was canary yellow. :whistles: (not my choice) There is a photograph of me wearing the thing somewhere, and I look miserable. To be fair, I always look miserable in photographs, but I looked extra-miserable because I was having to wear this nasty garment. :unsure:
Teachers were a daily source of sensory irritation for me..
I used to look at the floor a lot (to avoid eye contact) so I saw a lot of shoes and feet. Some shoes were aesthetically pleasing but not auditory, and vice versa. Occasionally, I'd hit the jackpot and get both. Yay! However, Miss Jones - the cow who humiliated me in front of the entire class - wore brown sandals which squeaked and she had the ugliest feet I've ever seen. But this was still preferable to looking at her face.:huh:
Cagoules and Pakamacs? Horrible, horrible things!!
Mine back in the 80s was royal blue with white stripes on the sleeves, Yuk!
Hated wearing the darned thing but nobody seemed to care about us Aspies and our sensory issues back then, we were just considered extremely naughty boys and girls and ordered to put up and shut up, or else!
I have a far superior (black) rain jacket now by the Trespass brand, which is far more comfortable to wear, especially with the torrential downpours we have been having recently.
Regarding your old battleaxe teacher Miss Jones, whom you said had ugly feet, I wonder if her feet were also pongy as well?
I remember at the very first nursery I attended at the age of 3 1/2 back in late 1980-early 1981, there was a staff member there who stank to high heaven of BO, and that was one of the reasons why I hated being there. I think her name was Mrs Robbins IIRC. I also recall her being (dare I say it, before I get accused of fat-shaming) rather obese.
I honestly can't fathom as to why a person with poor personal hygiene issues managed to be employed in a childcare/educational setting like that, where they should have been setting good examples.
I also recall another teacher at my final school who had really bad breath. When he asked what was the matter I replied with honesty and he told me to stop being so silly and personal!
No offence intended to Sir at the time, but surely he could have at least brushed his teeth before leaving home each morning, or sought medical advice had his halitosis problem persisted, but no, he was seemingly in denial about it and us pupils were wrong and insulting to him simply because he made us feel uncomfortable with his stinky breath, which surely he could have dealt with.
we were just considered extremely naughty boys and girls and ordered to put up and shut up, or else!
Yeah, I often wonder how many undiagnosed autistics ended up in Borstal (or a mental institution)
Regarding your old battleaxe teacher Miss Jones, whom you said had ugly feet, I wonder if her feet were also pongy as well?
They weren't - thankfully. Keyword with Jonesy was 'medicated' rather than perfume. You get me?
I remember at the very first nursery I attended at the age of 3 1/2 back in late 1980-early 1981, there was a staff member there who stank to high heaven of BO, and that was one of the reasons why I hated being there.
Some of my teachers had BO, and some went overboard on the pit spray - which could be just as irritating. One of my male teachers had a habit of leaning over me from the back, so I got full armpit exposure. :ohmy: (meanwhile, my pits were sopping wet from the anxiety of him invading my personal space)
I honestly can't fathom as to why a person with poor personal hygiene issues managed to be employed in a childcare/educational setting like that, where they should have been setting good examples.
I just think that some of my teachers should never have been allowed to work with kids in the first place. They didn't seem to like children at all...:shrug: They probably retired once their right to hit kids was taken away..:whistles:
MyNameIsTerry
04-11-20, 08:57
Back by popular demand (well, by Nora that is) and for one night only, your old flashers...
https://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/sex/t1542.gifhttps://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/sex/t15184.gif
Yeah, I often wonder how many undiagnosed autistics ended up in Borstal (or a mental institution)
They weren't - thankfully. Keyword with Jonesy was 'medicated' rather than perfume. You get me?
Some of my teachers had BO, and some went overboard on the pit spray - which could be just as irritating. One of my male teachers had a habit of leaning over me from the back, so I got full armpit exposure. :ohmy: (meanwhile, my pits were sopping wet from the anxiety of him invading my personal space)
I just think that some of my teachers should never have been allowed to work with kids in the first place. They didn't seem to like children at all...:shrug: They probably retired once their right to hit kids was taken away..:whistles:
I agree with you that there must have been a lot of teachers and people who worked in borstals and mental institutions who had a blatant hatred of kids and people with learning disabilities and revelled in the fact that they were paid to abuse, humiliate and degrade many already damaged persons. Good ol' days? NOT!
I never forget during the run-up to the 2015 GE that gobs**te Nigel Farage wanted to bring back school caning, borstals and mental institutions because he believed (and still does) that the youth of today and people who aren't 'normal' are undeserving evil scum!
I personally think that NF is a madman who should be sectioned himself, along with that other gobs**te madman Stephen Yaxley-Lennon (aka Tommy Robinson) of EDL (in)fame!!
I agree with you that there must have been a lot of teachers and people who worked in borstals and mental institutions who had a blatant hatred of kids and people with learning disabilities and revelled in the fact that they were paid to abuse, humiliate and degrade many already damaged persons. Good ol' days? NOT!
It doesn't surprise me that so many 'caring' professions have so many abusers on the payroll. Flushing them out is the problem!
There are also too many in the NHS that must have been off sick during the 'bedside manner' module because they literally have no compassion. I had a scan done once and the technician was told that I'm autistic and struggle with verbal instruction. My anxiety was severely high, so I was basically non-verbal. When I didn't respond to his verbal instructions - he took it upon himself to move my legs - and in a frustrated manner, not gently. I came out in tears and I couldn't explain to Hubs what was wrong until much later on..
To balance things up a little, there have also been some lovely people, but of course, it's the not so nice people which the brain remembers...
Some people are in the wrong jobs. :unsure:
It doesn't surprise me that so many 'caring' professions have so many abusers on the payroll. Flushing them out is the problem!
There are also too many in the NHS that must have been off sick during the 'bedside manner' module because they literally have no compassion. I had a scan done once and the technician was told that I'm autistic and struggle with verbal instruction. My anxiety was severely high, so I was basically non-verbal. When I didn't respond to his verbal instructions - he took it upon himself to move my legs - and in a frustrated manner, not gently. I came out in tears and I couldn't explain to Hubs what was wrong until much later on..
To balance things up a little, there have also been some lovely people, but of course, it's the not so nice people which the brain remembers...
Some people are in the wrong jobs. :unsure:
Sounds like that hospital technician who manhandled your legs was a right pillock with very few brain cells.
Trouble is, many of those unscrupulous chancers seem to be untouchable, and often have trade unions, sometimes with corrupt tendencies themselves, to bail them out if they face accusations against anything. I've heard some past horror stories about mega extremist militant trade unionists exacting revenge on places where people have been sacked from, such as arson attacks/fire-bombings, which borders on terroristic IMO.
Sadly the thought has become stuck on my head like the front garden. I believe it will never stop worrying until I move house or something this is how my ocd operates. I wish I could change how I seen this or maybe if I cleaned it and felt satisfied. I have read people with ocd who will bleach something and think that’s germs gone my issue is thinking something is forever dirty. This is the problem as it’s much worse than just somebody who will clean which may be ocd too my point is my ocd must be worse when I can’t clean it and feel relief? I have yet to find a cure for thinking something is forever contaminated. My wife put an item in that spot tonight now I refuse to use it
Trouble is, many of those unscrupulous chancers seem to be untouchable, and often have trade unions, sometimes with corrupt tendencies themselves, to bail them out if they face accusations against anything. I've heard some past horror stories about mega extremist militant trade unionists exacting revenge on places where people have been sacked from, such as arson attacks/fire-bombings, which borders on terroristic IMO.
The depths of the human mind no longer surprises me, but I still don't get why people do things like this.
It's my opinion that we're all potential killers (I'd kill anybody who was trying to hurt my kids for a start) This is primeval. But there's defence and there's intention.
I can't understand how one human being could cold-bloodedly plan to hurt another. :huh:
I believe it will never stop worrying until I move house or something this is how my ocd operates.
OCD has you by the danglers alright!
When you've uprooted yourself, and your good lady wife, and you have a new home for your OCD to play with, then what?
I wish I could change how I seen this or maybe if I cleaned it and felt satisfied.
You can. You just gave up when the going got tough, and it will always be tough to begin with.
Exposure therapy is the gold standard treatment of OCD.
I have yet to find a cure for thinking something is forever contaminated.
You've yet to stick at something long enough to be cured, Phil. :shrug:
Why don't you give ET another go?
Back by popular demand (well, by Nora that is) and for one night only, your old flashers...
https://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/sex/t1542.gifhttps://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/sex/t15184.gif
:roflmao:
According to the legend, our flasher wasn't as endowed as him on the right. :D
OCD has you by the danglers alright!
When you've uprooted yourself, and your good lady wife, and you have a new home for your OCD to play with, then what?
You can. You just gave up when the going got tough, and it will always be tough to begin with.
Exposure therapy is the gold standard treatment of OCD.
[COLOR=#353C41]
You've yet to stick at something long enough to be cured, Phil. :shrug:
Why don't you give ET another go?
I agree with you that simply upping sticks is not the answer to Phil's issue with germs and contamination.
Moving house will only take one's existing anxieties with them, and people often end up being hypervigilant towards potential hazards at their new places of residence, sometimes eventually finding even bigger anxiety-provoking issues to contend with, real or imagined.
Might be worth a peek at Phil's 14 year history :whistles:
Positive thoughts
Might be worth a peek at Phil's 14 year history :whistles:
Positive thoughts
I know what you're saying FMP, but I'd rather not take the mickey out of others on here 'cause it's not in my nature.
Not having digs at you BTW.
I know what you're saying FMP, but I'd rather not take the mickey out of others on here 'cause it's not in my nature.
Not having digs at you BTW.
I know... Its just that the same advice has been given over and over and over through the years, here and on other forums that Phil posts on. Unfortunately, there will always be someone to feed his dragon.
Positive thoughts
OCD has you by the danglers alright!
When you've uprooted yourself, and your good lady wife, and you have a new home for your OCD to play with, then what?
You can. You just gave up when the going got tough, and it will always be tough to begin with.
Exposure therapy is the gold standard treatment of OCD.
[COLOR=#353C41]
You've yet to stick at something long enough to be cured, Phil. :shrug:
Why don't you give ET another go?
I think ET is an alien concept for many struggling on here..
MyNameIsTerry
06-11-20, 02:31
:roflmao:
According to the legend, our flasher wasn't as endowed as him on the right. :D
It might actually be a very big external pile :ohmy:
Good one Terry :roflmao:
What I had seen today turned me off meatballs :scared15:
I think ET is an alien concept for many struggling on here..
I was waiting to see if anybody would pick up on this...:roflmao:
It might actually be a very big external pile :ohmy:
:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
MyNameIsTerry
06-11-20, 07:57
Good one Terry :roflmao:
What I had seen today turned me off meatballs :scared15:
What about the salami? :blush:
MyNameIsTerry
06-11-20, 08:05
I was waiting to see if anybody would pick up on this...:roflmao:
Do they do phone you at home? :whistles:
Failing that working at least ET comes in handy for a prostate check with that big finger :finger:
Do they do phone you at home? :whistles:
Failing that working at least ET comes in handy for a prostate check with that big finger :finger:
Terry, I'm 50, but I still totally break down every time E.T goes home. :weep:
I usually watch the film a few times a year, but now I will see that huge finger of his and think of prostate probes. :scared15:
The doctor, having snapped on the latex gloves, asked Joe Bloggs to assume the position. Then he tapped his bum-hole with a reassuring: I'll be right here. Now, be good! :roflmao:
I should write for Mills 'N' Boon, me. :D
I agree with you that simply upping sticks is not the answer to Phil's issue with germs and contamination.
Moving house will only take one's existing anxieties with them, and people often end up being hypervigilant towards potential hazards at their new places of residence, sometimes eventually finding even bigger anxiety-provoking issues to contend with, real or imagined.
I have just remembered I went through a similar phase of wanting to up sticks to a neighbouring town which has almost always been perceived as far more peaceful and affluent, when our town went through a very bad patch with yob culture and ASB during the first half of the 2000s, coupled with all the hysterical commentary in our local rag about it all, even though our estate was barely ever affected and probably had (and still has) one of the lowest crime rates in the entire area.
My parents refused point blank to move at the time and believed I was over-reacting and my dad said that the problems with yob culture, ASB and youth violence weren't really much different elsewhere at the time.
Incidentally, the oft-rose-tinted neighbouring town went through a very bad patch in its own right during the latter half of the 2000s and into the very early 2010s, with an epidemic of ASB, yob/chav culture and three murders in the five-year period between 2005 and 2010.
Bit like those who constantly proclaim to despise Britain and harp on about the the quality of life in other countries (e.g, Spain) being far superior and fairer than here but in reality those countries (and other towns/areas) often aren't quite what they seem at face value.
Valeriecam
07-11-20, 13:17
Hi I have panic attacks every 2 hours through the night, I am terrified and alone
Hi I have panic attacks every 2 hours through the night, I am terrified and alone
Hi Valerie, why haven't you started a new thread with this?
Anyway, that was me three years ago, only mine were more frequent than two hours and I developed severe insomnia.
I taught myself not to fear the panic attacks - and to breathe through them. Then I would get out of bed and move, no matter what time it was.
When you have a panic attack, your body is full of stress hormones (cortisol and adrenalin) and it's nigh on impossible to go back to sleep in that state. Even if you do manage to nod off from exhaustion you will probably have bad dreams and wake up again within a short time having another panic attack. Best thing is to get up and get moving to burn the adrenalin off. Do some light cleaning or just pace about your living room. Once you feel calmer (and you will) try to go to bed again...
Don't fear the attacks. It's just your body trying to protect you, only it's hyperstimulated so the stress response is going off at the slightest thing, and our dreams can trigger this response when we are sensitised. As can the closing of a car door or someone snoring...
This will take time, so don't be disheartened when you don't go back to normal quickly. It's a gradual process. But you aren't in any danger because panic attacks can't hurt you.
All the best.
So I mentioned how I was worried about the floor as my mum touched the bin and then a bag which was put on my floor. She also gave something which went on my kitchen work top and it also touched my sofa yet none of these worry me too much only the floor? Why would this be or do I need a psychologist to figure it out for me?
You'll have got your own inbuilt "rules" re contamination and there won't necessarily be a pattern. The floor is obviously more significant for you-it doesn't matter why.
Is it normal to feel anxiety every day? The feeling of being relaxed is something I have forgotten how to feel is anybody else like that?
And also I think I suffer from Thanatophobia(death anxiety)..
Yes it’s normal to be anxious every day. There are things that can help if you are willing to try them and to practice every day.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
My anxiety has got worse at work lately I have spells that last 30 mins where I feel weak, depersonalised and think I am dying. Again it’s thus worry about dying affecting me I mean I feel some cbt will help but it’s hard to find the right person for cbt?
It seems in the past it has always been therapy on your own terms. This will make it difficult for you to find the "right" therapist unless you are prepared to be a bit more flexible in terms of what you may be expected to attempt in order to make your anxiety more manageable in the long run.
Is it normal to feel anxiety every day? The feeling of being relaxed is something I have forgotten how to feel is anybody else like that?
And also I think I suffer from Thanatophobia(death anxiety)..
Why has your font suddenly gone massive?
I last felt relaxed in 2011 when I went under general anaesthetic. Prior to that, it was 2004 (GA again) and possibly when I was in the womb (1969-70)
General anaesthetics are great for anxiety, aren't they ?!!:D I love the effects of midazolam too!
I sat up from the sofa and felt a bump in my Heath and it hit the back of my throat and I felt a bit funny for a min but it triggered my anxiety tonight as I have health anxiety and worry falling ill. Is it my anxiety playing up? Also often feel a hunger and it can vary and be a bloated gas feeling instead?
LittleLionMan
25-12-20, 23:25
You probably just jarred yourself getting up, it will be something of nothing, I promise you.
Don't worry about it mate.
Hope you had a good Christmas.
Is it my anxiety playing up?
Yes.
Also often feel a hunger and it can vary and be a bloated gas feeling instead?
Try peppermint tea.
You need to be proactive Phil - instead of just symptom dumping all the time..
You need to be proactive Phil - instead of just symptom dumping all the time..
Look at his history and all the advice he's been given through the years... you're preaching to a wall I'm afraid :weep:
Positive thoughts
Look at his history and all the advice he's been given through the years... you're preaching to a wall I'm afraid :weep:
Positive thoughts
I know Fishmanpa, but I live in hope that one of these days something will go in. I've been where he is and it's not a nice place to be, believe me. I don't even want to imagine having this level of HA for 14 years! Also, I see other things in Phil aside the HA. He's complex (and I am complex) and that's probably another reason why I want to try and help him.
I know Fishmanpa, but I live in hope that one of these days something will go in. I've been where he is and it's not a nice place to be, believe me. I don't even want to imagine having this level of HA for 14 years! Also, I see other things in Phil aside the HA. He's complex (and I am complex) and that's probably another reason why I want to try and help him.
Sorry to sound pedantic Nora, but Phil may have already suffered from HA long before he first signed up to this site back in 2006, and it could very well have been only then that he first discovered this site.
I only signed up to this site at the start of March when this blasted pandemic was really starting to gain a foothold here in Blighty, but I have had very bad pangs of anxiety over various issues throughout my entire life, though thankfully most I had as a young child are now long gone, no doubt due to a much greater understanding of the world, and of course what's real and what's fiction.
Once again, nothing personal intended against you Nora.
I think if Nora wants to try then we should let her. We’ve all tried too, and even though we failed - we still hope that one thing would get through.
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I think if Nora wants to try then we should let her. We’ve all tried too, and even though we failed - we still hope that one thing would get through.
I'm not saying not to. I'm just trying to save her the same frustration so many others have experienced here and on several other forums that Phil posts on. for 14+ years here and for years previous Phil has been suffering from severe mental illness. At this point, its safe to assume his illness is terminal and nothing said in a virtual format is helping and in fact, anything said, including this reply is just food for his dragon. I have a gut feeling, years from now, even after I'm long gone from this earth, Phil will be posting the same things.
Positive thoughts
Fair warning, Nora, last time I made a concerted effort to help Phil I got a passive-aggressive PM when he decided he was leaving the site again.
I appreciate your compassion and patience, but please don't blame yourself if you hit a brick wall.
Sorry to sound pedantic Nora, but Phil may have already suffered from HA long before he first signed up to this site back in 2006, and it could very well have been only then that he first discovered this site.
I've had HA since I was a small child, Len. I just didn't know it was HA then, or when I was a teenager, or even into adulthood. It was only when I had the mental breakdown in 2016 that I understood what the issue was and once this happened I could see the pattern right back to being about 5 years old - 'incidentally when school started. So, I can appreciate that 14 years on here with Phil may not be the whole story, and this is another reason why I want to help him.
I'm not saying not to. I'm just trying to save her the same frustration so many others have experienced here and on several other forums that Phil posts on. for 14+ years here and for years previous Phil has been suffering from severe mental illness. At this point, its safe to assume his illness is terminal and nothing said in a virtual format is helping and in fact, anything said, including this reply is just food for his dragon. I have a gut feeling, years from now, even after I'm long gone from this earth, Phil will be posting the same things.
Positive thoughts
Thanks Fishmanpa, I appreciate where you're coming from. I do feel frustrated, yes. He isn't helping himself and that's where he and I are very different.
However..
I don't know what it's like not to have a mental health disorder. I've had mental health issues since I was 5 years old, and a brain that has been at odds with this world since birth. I'm always going to empathise with people like Phil because I recognise a lot of my own issues in him.
One problem is that it's easier to do nothing than to work against your own brain and for many people it can be the case that it serves them to stay in the state they're in, and this can be at a conscious or subconscious level. Maybe this is the case with Phil? There is comfort in familiarity - which is why some people choose to stay in the mire than to try and haul themselves out. It is much harder to help yourself with a brain that is wired up differently than 'the norm'. This could the situation here, as in we are throwing him the metaphorical lifebuoys but he's not making any attempt to grab on because the fear of change, and the effort required, is just too much for him to contemplate?
Where I come from there is a lovely old fella called Neil Baldwin (Nello) you might have seen the film Marvellous? It's his biography. Neil has learning disabilities but he's had a remarkable life - so remarkable that they made a film about him, and the stand out line in that film is this: I always wanted to be happy so I decided to be. The power of this sentence is mind-blowing to me. It doesn't matter what shit life throws at us - we can choose our response. This might be harder with a brain that's damaged, or different, but this remarkable man chose happiness over wallowing in self-pity - and he didn't allow his disabilities to stop him from achieving his goal - which was simply to be happy.
I would be over-the-moon if Phil was to take some notice of what I say, but even if nothing I say goes in, maybe it will help him a little to know that somebody on here has an understanding of him? Because loneliness to me is being in a room full of people of not one of them understanding you. :shrug:
My latest symptoms have been feeling weak or numb on my feet? Eventually it passes and being focused on my breathing like I feel more aware of it or like a strain? Are these anxiety symptoms?
Could have something to do with vaccines and masks. Might want to read THIS. (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/articles/symptoms)
FMP
One of my most common ones is I worry I am not breathing right. Often too fast that I am burping or lots of air often leads to bloating or burping ect anybody else have this? Often the breathing one can last a few hours? Another symptom is I feel I can thinking but sort of detached from things anybody have this?
The breathing can be heavy or heavy chest but often this symptom comes from the covid worry about shortness of breath I think and people needing oxygen. I often worry I am not getting enough air? But yeah I can spend hours worrying about breathing
One of my most common ones is I worry I am not breathing right.
That's because you're not breathing right Phil.
Often too fast that I am burping or lots of air often leads to bloating or burping ect anybody else have this?
There's a good free breathing exercise on the Calm app - maybe try that?
This is very common with anxiety. Come on Phil, you're an anxiety pro by now?
Often the breathing one can last a few hours?
Because you're focused on it..
Another symptom is I feel I can thinking but sort of detached from things anybody have this?
Depersonalisation, you mean?
The breathing can be heavy or heavy chest but often this symptom comes from the covid worry about shortness of breath I think and people needing oxygen. I often worry I am not getting enough air? But yeah I can spend hours worrying about breathing
My HA started when I was a child because my grandad couldn't breathe properly. Anxiety causes us to breathe too shallowly or too fast or we hold our breathe (etc) which creates symptoms and then our HA minds makes a connection that isn't actually there.
If you've ever watched someone struggle to take a breath, you're own chest will tighten. Blokes can have phantom pregnancies - that's the sort of shit your mind can do!
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