Worried I have no future? Health Anxiety

[Airisto]

I’m wondering if anyone can relate to this- so I am 21 years old and in college, if you’ve read any of my previous posts I have horribly irrational hypochondria, I’ve had it for 2 years now. I am starting to finally get better because I’ve been taking medicine and seeing a therapist. But for some reason I keep thinking I have no future and will die young??
Whenever I get happy and think about future plans like graduating or getting a job my mind goes “but you’re gonna die really soon so why even be look forward to that?” Even as a side hobby I draw art and make books for people and my mind goes “why are you agreeing to help make this book next month you might not even be alive then so there’s no point??” And it’s infuriating.
This all started when my health anxiety developed. Before this I loved going to school and making friends and doing my art and stuff. But now I hate going to school, I don’t try to make friends and I still LOVE doing art, it makes me the happiest but whenever I enjoy it my anxiety tells me I’m dying and won’t live past my 20’s and I have no future in this thing I love.
Has anyone else experienced this?? I am not sure if I’m afraid of the future or aging. I know a part of it is the small chance of getting cancer at a young age or another illness. But I’m not sure what I can do to stop feeling this? It’s ruining my passions and it’s not fun to think about. Thanks and sorry for the long post!!

[Allochka]

Hello,
sorry for your struggles. I struggle too at the moments. My fears are a bit different, but the basic is the same - these are instrusive thoughts we can’t get rid of.
Does your medicine include smth for OCD/intrusive thoughts?
Anyway, I am a firm believer we all can get better if we work hard on this. You will get better too!

[Airisto]

Hi, yes I had a feeling it might just be intrusive thoughts... I’m not sure if my medicine helps with that. I’m taking 60mg of Prozac, it defiantly helps with my anxiety but the thoughts continue. So I’m guessing no. Glad to hear I’m not alone and I hope you feel better :)

[Allochka]

I saw my therapist today and she prescribed Fluoxetine against intrusive thoughts. I just googled it - it is Prozac under another name... Maybe it haven’t kicked in, or another meds would help.
I have a friend who suffered form GAD and panic attacks for a year, seen several therapists, tried so many different meds until finally found her combination. She is doing very good since summer. Sometimes it is a process of trial and error

[ankietyjoe]

Those thoughts are part and parcel of anxiety and depression.

You say you're getting better with help, so next time you have those thoughts try and focus on the fact that you ARE getting better.

And, you're 21. That's one stop away from being a baby. You have time to heal. :winks:

[squiddy]

This is very relatable to me. My hypochondria peaked when I was your age and I worried all the same things you do (I'm also an artist too, and boy did it make it hard to work sometimes). I was convinced I was very much currently dying and would be gone soon. I had lots of symptoms that I found to be very convincing proof. But they weren't. I'm 30 now, and still get anxious I'm afraid to say, but am still here and have not acquired any life threatening illnesses. Despite how many times I've been convinced I have. I hope that's reassuring in some way!