How do you know you are better?

[lisa p]

Hi

I have had panic attacks for over 11 years, slowly getting worse the last few years, and finally resulting in me plucking up the courage to take meds.

I have been taking Citropram for quite a few months now, just 20 mg a day, and do manage to do little things, with my 10 min drive safety zone!

Some times I'm fine others the panic starts to rise, but I manage to fight it!

But, yesterday, I had to be really brave...

My hubby and 10 year old Son went to Snetterton race circuit and me and my 5 year old daughter stayed at home. After lunch hubby phoned to say son had shut keys in the car and they couldnt get home! ARRGH! This is a good 1.5 hours car journey, I didnt think it fair to ring the family and ask them as 3 hours out of a Sunday is not on. So armed with carry bags, in case I'm sick, rescue remedy and chewing gum, me and my daughter set off. The further I got from home the worse I felt, I felt sick, giddy and was shaking so much! Well we got there and did the journey in just over the hour! (Now waiting for the speeding tickets lol!), once I was there I have to say I didnt feel to bad, even managed a cup of tea. I followed hubby home and we stopped at Burger King to have tea, I have not eaten out for over two years!

Got home safe and sound and had a big glass of wine to chill out, was totally exhausted and didnt really know who to feel.

Hubby kept telling me how proud I must have felt and I must be better now, but I dont think that at all, I did what I had to do at the time, so what do you think??? - Could I go on longer journeys? - this is so confusing.

I am better travelling on my own, cant travel in the same car as hubby and kids, can with the kids only, as I know if we break down or something happens hubby will come and rescue us, but if we are in the same car - then what would happen?

Thanks for reading

Lisa

[Pink Panic]

Hi Lisa,

First off I'd just like to say WELL DONE YOU!

I think what you did was a great achievement and you should be very proud of yourself. The fact that you probably didn't have much time to think about or dwell on what was before you more than likely helped as you didn't have much time really to get any anticipatory anxiety. But another good thing is that you didn't rush right back to your safe place as you stopped off and had a meal.

I personally think you are getting better when you feel more able to cope with life in general and every waking action does not seem to be a struggle.
I find that going at my own pace is the best thing and not being pushed into doing things as then there is no pressure if you cannot make it and have to let people down, but on the other side sometimes that's a good thing as it gives us the initial push to try something we might otherwise have dismissed.

Once again, Well Done!

Love
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