Carlos.zzz
29-06-20, 18:06
Hi everyone, my name is Carlos and I have been dealing with anxiety for the past 3 years , ever since i was in my teens, I had a moment in my life where I puked before an event due to me being nervous, and I was so confused and couldn’t eat and could barely hold a smoothie down. Later that day is what led my anxiety to worsen , it seems the moment I leave school I become stressed and worried about my life. I used school as a safe zone for my anxiety bc I loved socializing with new people. I took anti depressants for a few months on and off telling myself the side effects weren’t worth it bc it didn’t let me live my life fully. I used both weed and Zoloft and it worked for a while and then I relaized I didn’t want to continue my dependence on stuff I wanted to grasp my own life. It’s like everything has been blessed in my life and I have every opportunity to make something beautiful in my life and I’m my own worst enemy. and now 3 years later I have dealt with it the best I could, pretending I was okay, and just pushing myself to go to these events no matter what. It got really bad to the point I couldn’t leave my house, I have always had a huge amount of friends and so many people who have supported me and it helped me get through high school and I developed ways to deal with it, throwing up before an event and even substance abuse like weed . I’m 18 now, I graduated high school and recently my anxiety has been coming back but this time it’s really my thoughts. I catch myself losing myself in my thoughts and I want to explore the world, go on trips with my friends and girlfriend but I’m so scared. My anxiety and stomach are so connected that once my mental falls apart so does my body. I don’t want to live with anxiety anymore and im struggling to find my own person as I become an adult. I’m so lost in whether or not I should take anti depressants again or continue fighting this feeling . I just want to live my life in peace and it feels so good to let my story out in the world. I have visited the worst of the worst one can experience with anxiety and can’t decide what’s the best route.. I really want to be successful and gain my interests again instead of thinking so much and having anxiety attacks when I eat out in new situations.
-Carlos from the u.s.
-Carlos from the u.s.