Health anxiety has gotten me bad lately

[Heather1234]

Ok so short version. I'm 39 and quit smoking in Oct 2018. I had a stressful event 8 mos after & started back. :( the last month I've been trying REALLY hard to quit again and my HA has been crazy.
First I noticed white patches in my mouth (on each side of where my mouth opens) they seemed to improve...(?)
So I promptly started worrying a female issue. Went to the dr...everything fine
Except had high bp while I was there which started a new rabbit trail.
I've been taking my bp at home and it's mostly good.
Now I'm noticing the white patches again. In my mind, theyve come back. Probably been there. Idk.
I cant get into the dentist for a while, and now I'm spirally over this. Ugh.
I know rationally that smoking increases my risk for oral cancer, but I also know cancer doesnt usually improve then come back. Or maybe it does. Idk.
From my research (I know, I shouldnt :/), I either have leukoplakia or oral cancer, or leukoplakia that will turn into oral cancer. Or possibly something else of course.
This anxiety makes it hard to quit even though I know its causing it. I'm still on track today though. No smoking. Just had to vent and obviously looking for sound logic, as I have lost mine.

[Heather1234]

Still have the white spots. Maybe a tad bit smaller. Not sure 😬

[Heather1234]

Anyone have anything like this? I cant stop obsessing over it 😢

[Scass]

Well done on stopping smoking!
Could it be thrush? Does it feel funny?
But also if the doctor said it’s nothing to worry about then perhaps it’s not? I would suggest a second opinion if it’s back again. Not because I think it’s anything to worry about, but just because you might need something topical to put on it.


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[Flapj]

Congrats on quitting smoking!

[Heather1234]

I actually havent been to the dr abt this worry yet. I made an apt at the dentist but its 2 weeks away. The covid mess I think is to cause for it being impossible to get in anywhere.
I dont think its thrush bc it doesnt rub off. It's on the inside of my cheek, and runs along my bite line somewhat. On both sides but one side is worse. My husband says it's hard to even see. Idk. I definitely see it.
Now I'm wondering if I'm making it worse by chewing gum. I've been chewing ALOT lately & I notice it sits right where the spots are. (Regular gum btw, not nic. Gum.lol)

Thank you for your reply :)

[Heather1234]

So I've just decided to stop checking on it. My husband thinks it's nothing to worry about, hes far more logical right now than I am. Even though my HA screams that's a horrible idea, I have to focus on quitting. Plus the last 3 days ive spent glued to my phone. Not the life of a good mom and wife at all. :(

If it's my worst fear, it will obviously get worse, there will be other signs & I'll deal with it bc I have to.

Checking every single moment for a fraction of a change is crazy. That has been me.

Anyhow, that's my current situation.lol

[Scass]

I think leaving it is a good idea. Maybe try not to check for 24 hours & then see how you get on.

I get oral thrush & I have never rubbed it off or even tried too.


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