GingerFish
10-08-20, 06:47
I've never been a good sleeper but this is the worst insomnia period I've had for a while, the worst since my stepdad died last Christmas. I could feel myself getting stressed over the last few days before insomnia started back up and didn't relax as much as I could or should have so I suppose it's my own doing.
My anxiety reached the peak 3 days ago and since then, I've had only about 7 hours broken sleep since then over 3 days. I keep waking up after half an hour. Days before that I had about 4/5 hours per night. I'm exhausted mentally and physically and feel like I'm about to go mad or something over it.
I know I should accept that I'm "coming down" from stress and insomnia is common and I should relax as much as possible but my god, it's hard. I was panicking about other symptoms I have such as back pain, palps etc but they have all calmed down.
I feel tired enough to sleep but my mind won't shut off and when I do feel close to drifting, some sensation in my back or chest wakes me up and I'm back to square one, it feels like. Other than the tiredness and worry about insomnia, I feel a lot better during the day than I did a few days ago but I feel awful at bed time. Just looking at my bed makes my stomach and heart drop. It feels like climbing Everest would be easier than falling asleep right now.
I'm trying my hardest to counteract all the bad and irrational thoughts like "I'll never sleep again! I can't cope!" With more positive ones like "I've been here before. I'll be ok. I'm one day closer to having a better sleep pattern" but the hope just isn't sticking at the moment. Just feel so defeated and lost. One minute I have hope, courage and logic and the next I'm crying and debating whether to call the crisis team or something out of utter helplessness.
I've got a phone call appt with my mental health team in 2 days, hoping maybe that will help. Maybe talking will help? I've been talking to my family and they've been supportive but none of them have insomnia. They think it's just a cause of I'm not trying hard enough to sleep.
Anyone else had bad insomnia spells? Honestly feels never ending.
My anxiety reached the peak 3 days ago and since then, I've had only about 7 hours broken sleep since then over 3 days. I keep waking up after half an hour. Days before that I had about 4/5 hours per night. I'm exhausted mentally and physically and feel like I'm about to go mad or something over it.
I know I should accept that I'm "coming down" from stress and insomnia is common and I should relax as much as possible but my god, it's hard. I was panicking about other symptoms I have such as back pain, palps etc but they have all calmed down.
I feel tired enough to sleep but my mind won't shut off and when I do feel close to drifting, some sensation in my back or chest wakes me up and I'm back to square one, it feels like. Other than the tiredness and worry about insomnia, I feel a lot better during the day than I did a few days ago but I feel awful at bed time. Just looking at my bed makes my stomach and heart drop. It feels like climbing Everest would be easier than falling asleep right now.
I'm trying my hardest to counteract all the bad and irrational thoughts like "I'll never sleep again! I can't cope!" With more positive ones like "I've been here before. I'll be ok. I'm one day closer to having a better sleep pattern" but the hope just isn't sticking at the moment. Just feel so defeated and lost. One minute I have hope, courage and logic and the next I'm crying and debating whether to call the crisis team or something out of utter helplessness.
I've got a phone call appt with my mental health team in 2 days, hoping maybe that will help. Maybe talking will help? I've been talking to my family and they've been supportive but none of them have insomnia. They think it's just a cause of I'm not trying hard enough to sleep.
Anyone else had bad insomnia spells? Honestly feels never ending.