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InfiniteJ
14-10-20, 13:31
I’ve dealing with health anxiety for a while now; probably close to 15 years…I’ve had some cases that were “major” that led me to spending major money on different scans, tests, doctor’s visits, etc. and some cases that are more of a blip on the radar that I’m able to eventually power through somewhat easily. I’m currently going through a scare with pancreatic cancer, which I know a lot of you have dealt with as well.

I’m almost 43 years old, father of two, and a partner to the world’s most understanding girlfriend.

A couple of months ago I had an issue with some pretty bad bleeding via internal hemorrhoids, I believe I had one burst and was definitely a moment of panic, but it had happened before and I chalked it up to not being anything serious, even though I do have a family history of colon cancer. After that I had a bout of constipation that I’m still dealing with on-and-off, which started to concern me because I’ve never really had a problem like that before...I tried to blame it on a few minor things at first, but after changing those minor things, the issue still continued.

From there I started having issues with feeling bloated and water-logged…it would come-and-go; I’d deal with it for 4 or 5 days and then it would be gone for a few days before it would come back again. Then I started dealing with indigestion off-and-on, but nothing too persistent; over the counter meds usually helped alleviate the situation.

I actually got to the point where I felt quite a bit better, but then one evening I had a really greasy meal and it’s been all down hill from there…pretty much from that meal forward everything became worse and more persistent; my indigestion is bad enough to were I can’t even drink water without regurgitating some of it back up, same with “mild” foods like toast and bananas. I developed a dull pain in the pit of my stomach that ran through to my upper back, I started having stabbing pains on my left side under my ribcage that also runs through to my back…in fact, my the whole left side of my abdomen aches…especially when laying down. In fact, all these pains are worse when I lay down and somewhat relieved when I get up (other than the dull pain in my stomach, which feels like someone is pressing their fist into my stomach, right below my ribcage). I started to feel nauseous almost every time I ate which always leads to indigestion/regurgitation. I’m now battling acid reflux, which is something I’ve never had before, same with heartburn. My appetite has become almost non-existent and when I do eat, I find myself getting full much sooner than normal…which has led to me losing about 8 to 10 pounds.

I went to my gastroenterologist and told her my story, she didn’t dismiss my worries about my pancreas, but she was definitely more concerned about getting me in for a colonoscopy (which I have on the 20th of this month), she gave me a prescription of Omeprazole, talked about doing a ultrasound on my gallbladder, and did some blood work, all which came back fine…or so I thought. After going back and looking at the blood work results myself I noticed something that really panicked me; my blood sugar was elevated to the point where it was flagged as being “pre-diabetic”, which of course was one of the symptoms that I had remembered reading about and constantly reminding myself that I didn’t have because I have no history of high blood sugar, at least not to my knowledge.

I have a regular pre-scheduled appointment with my general practitioner tomorrow and I have yet to see them since all this has started…I want to tell them that I want a CT scan of my abdomen, but I’m pretty sure my doctor won’t go for it.

I’m trying to keep a level head and tell myself that this probably just my gallbladder acting up (5 years ago I was told I had gallstones after a ultrasound, but the doctor didn’t want to remove anything)…but we all know how that works; my mind keeps going back to cancer and how doctors won’t find it until it’s too late.

Anyways, I know a lot of you on here have dealt with the exact same stress and anxiety over the thoughts/symptoms of pancreatic cancer…does anyone have any advice or words of wisdom they could share…it would be much appreciated.

NoraB
14-10-20, 15:39
Pancreatic cancer takes a long time to develop. You had an ultrasound 5 years ago and they would most likely have looked at the pancreas then. Even if it had developed in-between then and now - your blood tests would most likely have been abnormal - liver function etc, and yours were clear.

The odds are that this is gallbladder or acid reflux. Incidentally, I am having blood work and an ultrasound for abdominal pain, nausea, loss of appetite etc. However, it's nothing I haven't had before, when I was given the all clear - it's just that the pain is in a different place and it's common sense to get new pain checked out.

Re your blood work...

You're not a doctor. You don't know what you are looking for. If your GP hasn't raised a concern re blood sugar levels, then take it that's nothing to worry about.

Enjoy the bum cam and those fetching paper shorts with the hole at the back. :winks:

Try not to let your thoughts spiral.

InfiniteJ
14-10-20, 16:18
Thanks, Nora. Did your doctor recommend the blood work/ultrasound this time around?

I feel like I have also experienced this before, but it seems way more intense this time around.

People with HA seem to gravitate towards particular ailments more than others, like pancreatic cancer; any idea why?

molly15
14-10-20, 20:17
Hi there im sorry you are going through this its truly horrible. Health anxiety can really make us feel out of control ,scared and exhausted with the constant worry. I am going through the same just now and trying my best to tackle it but some days are better than others unfortunately but I keep trying. I have a thread in the stomach issues forum about acid reflux if you have a read at that it sounds very similar to what you are suffering.

Nora b is right about the bloods if there was something dreadful going on like you think the bloods would more than likely be off especially the liver . As for your blood sugar level being elevated to pre diabetic stage that doesn't mean anything. Your blood sugar changes all day and rises especially when your stressed so to get a accurate reading you would need to have fasted all night and be less anxious. For example I got my bloods done about 5 weeks ago at hospital as I ended up in a&e with palpations and my blood glucose was 1 point above normal range now if you look at a chart that would mean pre diabetic. When I got home I checked it myself unfortunately being a health worker I have access to all these things not a good idea I may add anyway it was only 4.9 so back to normal. So everything changes all the time especially when we are so uptight and our bodies are tense and pumping out so much adrenaline.

It all sounds like total stress or it could be your gall bladder acting up but that is a very common issue but of course that's for a doctor to decide . But stress is definitely making things much worse believe me I know and I completely understand what you are going through. You are not alone in this xx

InfiniteJ
14-10-20, 20:44
Hi, Molly. I'm sorry to hear that you are dealing with similar issues.

I had a doctor's appointment today and I was told that while the clean blood work is good, that it's not a definitive test that puts me in the clear. He's sending me in for a CT scan of my abdomen/pelvis and I also have to go to some sort of swallow study, which is good because they should be able to tell me exactly what's wrong, if anything.

I fully realize that stress/anxiety can play havoc with our bodies/brains but that knowledge alone isn't enough to calm my fears. I'm pretty good about taking my individual "symptoms" and coming up with rational, non-lethal reasons as why I have them...but this time around feels different (though, I bet we all say that)...something isn't right, this feels less like fear and more like intuition.

Whenever I go through stuff like this I always think of that line from that Nirvana song "just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you".

molly15
14-10-20, 21:37
Hi there

Yes the bloods are good and they are a good indication that things are working as they should they are not 100% full proof for sure . But its still a good sign .

I had a ct scan in May and its painless it was over in no time i had mine with contrast too but it was still very quick and im sure this will hopefully set your mind at rest .

The swallow test is drinking a horrid tasting liquid and it shows if there is any acid coming up or any other issues related to your oesophagus which im sure there won't be .

I get what your saying about things feeling different and I do feel this way most times but when its something new or different of Course you should get it checked out as the worry would drive us insane .

Good luck and I hope you get these tests done soon so you can move forward and back on track . Xx

Dexter James
15-10-20, 00:01
Thanks, Nora. Did your doctor recommend the blood work/ultrasound this time around?


People with HA seem to gravitate towards particular ailments more than others, like pancreatic cancer; any idea why?

People with health anxiety gravitate to all types of cancer i think it's the most common worry mine in fact started with my liver then kidneys brain lungs and so on, The blood test is very effective with many cancers as well especially the pancreas so if your getting blood work i really do hope this helps you i just won't you to know you can recover 15 years is a long time suffering With HA Hope all goes well and that next greasy meal feels good we all deserve a treat sometimes :)

NoraB
15-10-20, 05:53
Thanks, Nora. Did your doctor recommend the blood work/ultrasound this time around?

I feel like I have also experienced this before, but it seems way more intense this time around.

People with HA seem to gravitate towards particular ailments more than others, like pancreatic cancer; any idea why?

Yes, my GP recommended the tests, but this was via an online consultation. I wasn't examined as I have been in the past. I also have a family history of ovarian cancer - which is in my notes - so it's common sense that all new abdominal pain and IBS changes are investigated, and my policy is to speak to my GP if a new symptom is persistent and hasn't buggered off within 3 weeks. Having fibromyalgia - this means that I have lots of symptoms, some of which are new, and I have to walk the line between HA and common sense because not everything will be down to fibro, or anxiety.

People with HA go straight to cancers like pancreatic because it's life-threatening and HA at its core - is a severe fear of dying/death. Which is why it's so important to address this fear.

The problem with anxiety (and anxiety based conditions) is that so many of the symptoms can mimic some very serious diseases - which is why we become utterly convinced of our self-diagnoses. We don't bother with the most likely causes, like anxiety or conditions which are entirely treatable. Even if the symptoms don't fit, we will make them fit. Symptoms that didn't exist, suddenly do - such is the power of the mind. Nor do we consider that, even if it does turn out to be what we fear (not likely) we live in an age where advances in medicine are so great that it is entirely possible to recover from cancer. My aunty beat bowel cancer. Mind you, she was a battle axe - it wouldn't have dared finish her off! :huh:

With you, pancreatic cancer is your worst case scenario, but it's also the least likely one.