Please can someone help, I can't take this health anxiety anymore

[melie1818]

Can anyone help me? I'm so tired of feeling like this, the panic every single day over countless things. Last night I felt a scratchy feeling on my side next to my boob and after checking it wasn't my clothing I noticed there was a tiny blood spot there (think it's called a cherry angioma), I have some dotted around my trunk but the fact I had this scratchy feeling in the same place panicked me so I began scratching at it. Now it has gone black which I presume is from forming a scab but in my head I took it as being a skin cancer as I've read that they can start as a tiny dot. So I've just been in the bathroom with nail scissors to dig it out and it was obviously bleeding.

This isn't normal behaviour is it? I've lost a stone and a half since June as my health anxiety came back with a vengeance in July which resulted in having to get tests and booked in for a biopsy for thyroid cancer (luckily on the day they said I was all fine so not needed). My cancer fears since July have been pancreatic, thyroid, esophageal, skin cancer, breast cancer, ovarian cancer, cervical cancer, bone cancer, brain tumour and ear tumour.

Now my 8 year old has picked up on my anxiety and is constantly pointing out spots and aches and pains that she has and is worried about.

I've been back on Sertaline for a couple of months now and had three sessions of counselling but I can't see a way out of this. I've had health anxiety for 5 years and only been able to keep it at bay for a few months at a time.

[Scass]

I can only recommend speaking to your doctor and absolutely not digging scissors into yourself ever.

Your daughter may be picking up on some things, so treat it as a sign that you need to seek help so that you can teach both of you some new behaviours.


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[NoraB]

This isn't normal behaviour is it?

No, it isn't. It's self-harm.


My cancer fears since July have been pancreatic, thyroid, esophageal, skin cancer, breast cancer, ovarian cancer, cervical cancer, bone cancer, brain tumour and ear tumour.

It's generally cancer with HA, that and MS or heart disease.


Now my 8 year old has picked up on my anxiety and is constantly pointing out spots and aches and pains that she has and is worried about.

This is why you have to sort your HA out, and you need to do this for your kid, as well as yourself.


I've been back on Sertaline for a couple of months now and had three sessions of counselling but I can't see a way out of this.

There isn't a quick fix. Three sessions won't do it. However, it is a start, and well done for being proactive.


I've had health anxiety for 5 years and only been able to keep it at bay for a few months at a time.

You don't want to be 'keeping it at bay' that's not how you beat HA - that's just putting it into hibernation for a bit.

Recovery will take time and a lot of effort. You can do it though, and what better reason than to help your child?

[melie1818]

Thank you both for your replies and I really want to get better for my daughters sake as well as mine as she is so much worse at 8 years old than I was at that age.

Nora, your replies to people's posts always make so much sense and I can only hope that one day I'll be able to get to the same place mentally as you.

[pulisa]

You have the motivation to get better, melie. Do it for your little girl because otherwise she will absorb and copy your behaviours and you don't want to give her that "legacy".

There's no reason why you can't get better and liberating yourself from the shackles of HA will be the best thing you can do for yourself and for your family.

[NoraB]

Nora, your replies to people's posts always make so much sense and I can only hope that one day I'll be able to get to the same place mentally as you.

If you're prepared to put the time and effort into getting better, you'll get there!

You can absolutely break this cycle for you and your daughter.

All the best.