panicdiva
30-10-07, 22:26
Hi all,
Well, one of my worst scenarios happened on Sunday. I was at a meeting with a bunch of parents. I am ok going into rooms now, I don't even mind doors being shut anymore. Infact, to be honest, i did not even realise the door was shut. We had been in there for a good hour when I saw one of the mums getting up to go to the toilet. I saw her trying to open the door and I heard her say, I can't get out. Well that was the start. I thought, ok, it will open, so I looked away. A few others got up to investigate, then one mum says, we're locked in!!! Bear in mind, we were on the second floor. I have been doing so well in regards to my panic attacks, despite being depressed again. However, the fear hit me big time. I don't know how I managed to stay calm. I kept thinking I'm going to start screaming right now. The girl next to me saw that I was getting agitated, she said don't worry the window's open we can always get out that way. But that made me feel worse because I kept thinking what if in a state of panic I try to jump out that window?
What had happened was that the door knob on our side had come off. One lady was trying to call someone on her mobile to get someone to open the door on the other side. She was having no luck getting in touch with anyone. About 5 mins later, someone else tried to turn the bit where the knob had come off & somehow, thankfully, managed to get the door open. I had to stay in that room for another hour!!!!! They jammed a mop in the door so that we would not get locked in again. I kept looking over to the door to make sure that stupid mop was still there!!!!
Yes I did get through that moment, but what if it had gone on longer? I really thought that I was going to start freaking out. I thought I am going to lose it & make a complete & utter fool of myself, or I'm going to throw myself out that window!!!!
I feel gutted that I still feel like this. All my working towards getting better has worked, but when it comes to something like that, the panic is there just the same!!!!
However, it is past now.
Well, one of my worst scenarios happened on Sunday. I was at a meeting with a bunch of parents. I am ok going into rooms now, I don't even mind doors being shut anymore. Infact, to be honest, i did not even realise the door was shut. We had been in there for a good hour when I saw one of the mums getting up to go to the toilet. I saw her trying to open the door and I heard her say, I can't get out. Well that was the start. I thought, ok, it will open, so I looked away. A few others got up to investigate, then one mum says, we're locked in!!! Bear in mind, we were on the second floor. I have been doing so well in regards to my panic attacks, despite being depressed again. However, the fear hit me big time. I don't know how I managed to stay calm. I kept thinking I'm going to start screaming right now. The girl next to me saw that I was getting agitated, she said don't worry the window's open we can always get out that way. But that made me feel worse because I kept thinking what if in a state of panic I try to jump out that window?
What had happened was that the door knob on our side had come off. One lady was trying to call someone on her mobile to get someone to open the door on the other side. She was having no luck getting in touch with anyone. About 5 mins later, someone else tried to turn the bit where the knob had come off & somehow, thankfully, managed to get the door open. I had to stay in that room for another hour!!!!! They jammed a mop in the door so that we would not get locked in again. I kept looking over to the door to make sure that stupid mop was still there!!!!
Yes I did get through that moment, but what if it had gone on longer? I really thought that I was going to start freaking out. I thought I am going to lose it & make a complete & utter fool of myself, or I'm going to throw myself out that window!!!!
I feel gutted that I still feel like this. All my working towards getting better has worked, but when it comes to something like that, the panic is there just the same!!!!
However, it is past now.