Has anyone gone for therapy and it hasn’t worked?

[wingo22]

Hi everyone,

I have been able to see a therapist and we had about 6 sessions talking about CBT/ health anxiety, etc.

My main problem is me feeling around my body for lumps or bumps. I do it constantly. I am now focused on my armpit.

I have been though these seasons, done the homework and reading but just seem like it is not helping and I am not getting any better.
I have 2 questions:

1) has anyone else felt this way about therapy? What did you do to get better?
2) If I had a cancerous lymph node would it be easy to find? Like I shouldn’t hav to poke and search around for it right??

Thanks

[Scass]

I can tell your therapy didn’t work because of your last question [emoji23].

It didn’t really work for me. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind and I didn’t do the homework properly or kept up the practice. I think if you do that then you have a good chance of beating it. But you have to put a lot of work into it and some of us find that very hard.


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[pav1984]

Hi everyone,

I have been able to see a therapist and we had about 6 sessions talking about CBT/ health anxiety, etc.

My main problem is me feeling around my body for lumps or bumps. I do it constantly. I am now focused on my armpit.

I have been though these seasons, done the homework and reading but just seem like it is not helping and I am not getting any better.
I have 2 questions:

1) has anyone else felt this way about therapy? What did you do to get better?
2) If I had a cancerous lymph node would it be easy to find? Like I shouldn’t hav to poke and search around for it right??

Thanks

CBT is hard and requires a lot of hard work and willpower from you. Often you can feel worse at first because you are challenging yourself. The therapist can only give you support and the tools to achieve your goal. The hard work has to come from you.

This is hard but is really worth it if you persist with it.

Interestingly my therapist said to me the health anxiety is just general anxiety but is focused on health. I thought about this and it is right. I am a generally anxious person and I needed to find the real reason for my anxiety. Basically what is missing from your life/what is truly bothering you.

Once you get to the source of this your anxiety goes.

[ankietyjoe]

CBT is hard and requires a lot of hard work and willpower from you.


This


It's not the therapy not working, it's the OP not applying the lessons learned in therapy. Therapy isn't like taking a pill, and requires active participation.


You can't go to CBT for health anxiety AND keep checking/asking for reassurance. You cannot keep performing HA activities (checking, Googling, asking for reassurance) and expect to recover as it will never, ever happen.

[debs71]

It's not the therapy not working, it's the OP not applying the lessons learned in therapy. Therapy isn't like taking a pill, and requires active participation.


You can't go to CBT for health anxiety AND keep checking/asking for reassurance. You cannot keep performing HA activities (checking, Googling, asking for reassurance) and expect to recover as it will never, ever happen.

Agreed. Therapy is not a one-way street. It takes work on both sides - the therapist gives you the help and tools to address your anxiety and you need to try to implement them and be proactive. Anxiety is NEVER easy to combat. It takes so much determination and mental strength, which is hard when mental strength is lacking and your mind is screaming at you, I know.

I was diagnosed with depression, generalized anxiety and panic disorder way back in 2003, which cuminated in a complete mental breakdown. I had 18 weeks of one-to-one counselling through a mental health charity here in the UK. Did it help me? Yes, from the perspective that I was able to talk to a complete stranger who could offer me totally unbiased and plain speaking help and advice when it came to unravelling my thoughts and fears. Did it stop my mental health issues?

NO.

It offered me a chance to get things off of my chest and unburden myself, but I am still dealing with all of my conditions today.

There is no silver bullet when it comes to anxiety, or any other mental health problem. I take meds which take the edge off of the worst of my symptoms, but as far as the rest of it, I have just had to find my own ways of coping with the anxiety and panic. The only plus side is that after 17 years of this, the anxiety is something I am used to and I understand the highs and lows of it much better and have ways to tackle it myself.

These things we have are a battle that we cannot just expect to be cured by someone else alone. It takes us to fight them too.

[MrLurcher]

Therapy has been hit and miss for me, but I feel having the right therapist is also important.

I tried CBT 2 years ago ish when I was suffering with HA and also general anxiety about other aspects of my life, and I didn't find it helpful at all. The therapist was very nice, but I just found it almost like a lecture. The second CBT therapist I was seeing before lockdown was much more engaging and challenged my thought patterns. I felt I was doing good progress with her, but lockdown happened and mental health services p[retty much stopped.

I've also done a few months of hypnotherapy, I'm not sure how effective it was in 'curing' HA, but I did take comfort in listening to the tracks and doing my sessions. It certainly helped me cope with a very, very difficult period in my life with HA, and I still listen to the tracks now and again.

[Pamplemousse]

Yes.

CBT has proven to be a waste of time for me; a friend at work has also found it to be useless too.

I know there are evangelists on here who think CBT's the greatest thing since sliced bread but the reality is that it does not work for everyone.

[pav1984]

Yes.

CBT has proven to be a waste of time for me; a friend at work has also found it to be useless too.

I know there are evangelists on here who think CBT's the greatest thing since sliced bread but the reality is that it does not work for everyone.

Of course people will recommend a treatment that has worked for them. The reason we respond to someone's questions is because we care and want to help.

CBT doesn't work for everyone but shouldn't be discouraged just because it doesn't work for some. My advice is try it, and if it doesn't work try something else. It really is a matter of finding what works for you.

I think it essential that you learn to calm yourself down when in a spiral. You will not achieve anything when panicking.

I am of the opinion that anxiety of any kind needs to be addressed at the source. Work out why you are anxious and deal with that.

[Pamplemousse]

Of course people will recommend a treatment that has worked for them. The reason we respond to someone's questions is because we care and want to help.

CBT doesn't work for everyone but shouldn't be discouraged just because it doesn't work for some. My advice is try it, and if it doesn't work try something else. It really is a matter of finding what works for you.

The big problem is accessing that "something else". CBT is cheap, other options aren't.

[ankietyjoe]

I know there are evangelists on here who think CBT's the greatest thing since sliced bread but the reality is that it does not work for everyone.

Why do you imply that somebody who suggests something that works is negative by labelling them 'evangelists' and negating their enthusiasm?

You did the same with me when I recommend a healthy eating plan, when healthy eating is at the heart of virtually every recovery plan (mental or physical) known to man.

Seems an odd attitude to have.

[Pamplemousse]

Why do you imply that somebody who suggests something that works is negative by labelling them 'evangelists' and negating their enthusiasm?

You did the same with me when I recommend a healthy eating plan, when healthy eating is at the heart of virtually every recovery plan (mental or physical) known to man.

Seems an odd attitude to have.

Because unlike you, I'm a realist.

[pulisa]

A bog standard CBT package isn't enough to help people with more complex issues. Nor is a healthy eating plan although good nutrition is always the best hope for robust physical health.

My daughter has an exemplary diet but is tormented by anxiety. She's also had many attempts at CBT and ACT. It's not her fault that she is unable to access therapy. Psychologists acknowledge that some people have little success no matter how hard they persevere.

[ankietyjoe]

A bog standard CBT package isn't enough to help people with more complex issues. Nor is a healthy eating plan although good nutrition is always the best hope for robust physical health.

My daughter has an exemplary diet but is tormented by anxiety. She's also had many attempts at CBT and ACT. It's not her fault that she is unable to access therapy. Psychologists acknowledge that some people have little success no matter how hard they persevere.

I don't think anybody has ever said one of those ingredients is the magic formula.


I was realistic with myself and did CBT AND healthy eating AND meditation AND exercise AND self mantra's AND another bout of therapy and did it for 2-3 years every single day. I kind of resent the idea that I'm peddling nonsense snake oil.

To belittle other people's hard earned success is an odd stance to take because individual components didn't work for you. That's not being a realist, that's being a pessimist.

I remember once reading an article or study that said that most people take several years to get to an anxious state, and that it can often take at least as long to get out of it again. It's all connected with subconscious reaction, which is tricky and time consuming to reprogram.

I know that in the absence of a physical or chemical issue, there is a solution to everybody's anxiety. Of course you don't have to believe me, it's for me to 'know' that.

I do hope your daughter finds an answer soon.

[bin tenn]

As others said, of course therapy isn't always the solution. Sometimes it's medication, sometimes therapy, sometimes both. It may also involve dietary and other lifestyle changes.

I personally had success with therapy. I'm still not quite where I want to be, but it really helped put some things into perspective. I specifically told my therapist I didn't want to get caught up in a specific type of therapy (e.g. CBT), but instead I wanted to try various techniques regardless of CBT or other forms of therapy. I didn't want to restrict the approach. Maybe that would help you, too?

[pulisa]

I don't think anybody has ever said one of those ingredients is the magic formula.


I was realistic with myself and did CBT AND healthy eating AND meditation AND exercise AND self mantra's AND another bout of therapy and did it for 2-3 years every single day. I kind of resent the idea that I'm peddling nonsense snake oil.

To belittle other people's hard earned success is an odd stance to take because individual components didn't work for you. That's not being a realist, that's being a pessimist.

I remember once reading an article or study that said that most people take several years to get to an anxious state, and that it can often take at least as long to get out of it again. It's all connected with subconscious reaction, which is tricky and time consuming to reprogram.

I know that in the absence of a physical or chemical issue, there is a solution to everybody's anxiety. Of course you don't have to believe me, it's for me to 'know' that.

I do hope your daughter finds an answer soon.

I acknowledge and appreciate that you have found the answer to managing your anxiety, Joe. I just wanted to say that some people have additional issues-sometimes remaining undiagnosed-which can affect how they respond to therapy and any other alternative treatments. For them it's not a question of years of perseverance,it's about trying to make the best of a challenging genetic pool and a complex wiring system.

Even if you can't get on with therapy or make any noticeable progress I think it's a good thing to be able to show compassion towards yourself and to others and to do the best you can to make your life more manageable.

[BlueIris]

Kind of torn here, to be honest. I think it's a natural and kind thing to advocate for the methods that have worked for us, and to vouch for them to people who might be feeling too low to be able to take the necessary steps unprompted. I don't think this is evangelising, I think it's trying to help.

On the other hand, even as somebody who did well with CBT, I think it's shocking that this is pretty much the only talking therapy anywhere near available on the NHS.

As Pulisa says, it's a bit reductive to assume that everybody's anxiety can be solved because we're all so different, and each anxiety issue is a complex equation of nature, nurture and lived experience. I'm seeing a lot of black-and-white thinking in this thread and I don't think that's ever going to help.

[pulisa]

I don't think you can say that there is a solution to everyone's anxiety, Joe even if you believe you "know" that yourself. It's just your opinion.

[Scass]

Kind of torn here, to be honest. I think it's a natural and kind thing to advocate for the methods that have worked for us, and to vouch for them to people who might be feeling too low to be able to take the necessary steps unprompted. I don't think this is evangelising, I think it's trying to help.

On the other hand, even as somebody who did well with CBT, I think it's shocking that this is pretty much the only talking therapy anywhere near available on the NHS.

As Pulisa says, it's a bit reductive to assume that everybody's anxiety can be solved because we're all so different, and each anxiety issue is a complex equation of nature, nurture and lived experience. I'm seeing a lot of black-and-white thinking in this thread and I don't think that's ever going to help.

Hello lovely, nice to see you.


I have definitely learnt a lot from CBT and all the many books and articles I’ve read, even from this forum. But it still has to be put into practice, and sometimes that is the hard bit.


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[pav1984]

I think the original poster was looking for some hope that there is a way out of their current anxiety. I therefore think that some of the negativity on this thread is counter productive. Most of us are here because we are either suffering or have suffered from anxiety. Please try and help them find a solution.

So cbt might not work for all people, why is that? In the case they haven't applied it correctly, then let's help them.

In the case that it just isnt working, what other strategies can they try that have helped you?

One person has suggested healthy diet and exercise, this has to be worth a shot? If nothing else you will be healthier.

My therapist recommends distraction. When you go start to spiral, distract yourself with something.

I personally recommend working out the route cause of your anxiety. No coping strategies will have a permanent effect until you solve the actual problem. Once you discover what is missing or not dealt with, the anxiety goes.