Is this as good as it gets?

[looking4answers]

I haven't been here in months and months. I even sold my computer so that I would not be tempted to write here.

I keep thinking as I read what is said in post after post of the words from the movie with the same title."what if this is as good as it gets" spoken by Jack Nicolson in the office of a therapist.

I read post after post of the same symptoms and the things I have suffered with for years. I am tempted to answer each and everyone by itself to try to help. Although now Im wondering myself If I can even help feeling the symptoms my own self.

I hope it makes most of you feel better to know that almost everything that is listed here in this forum I have suffered with for years and at age 53 I am still alive and kicking.

I haven't really had any bouts with anxiety lately.. a first in a couple of years but its something that really never ever leaves us..it subsides but as far as it goes.. It will probably never leave you .I feel for each and everyone of you so sad that you ever had this feeling to start with. Many say they have gone on and let go of it and never looked back and written books to help others understand and cope with things.

But I can almost tell you that without a doupt they never rid themselves of it ever.Although I haven't been here in months and just bought a new computer. Its my life lol.. Like I said im really tempted to pat each and everyone of you on the back here and tell you that it will be ok ,but then again I would be posting for hours. All I can say is that yes I have felt what you feel and suffered with it off and on for years and then there have been years that I lost the fear of fear..which it all boils down to and those years were very happy.

Keep in mind as I read here where someone posted that 99 percent of what you worry about never comes to pass such as heart attack, stroke,brain tumor or blood clot.. unless you are prone to it or have a family history of it or just are very old or unhealthy. I suspect that many of you are still in your 20's and 30's .I keep reading of most of you have young children you don't want to leave. Your sudden bout with anxiety which you never had or had very little arrives with the realization of you being mortal from having children.

Before you were too busy with your friends or partying or getting ready for the prom or getting involved.Those were your worries then.. But now you have kids and you are on a path and you are worried where that path is leading and you know in your heart that you are in fact MORTAL.. So live each day as if it was your last,try not to cling to life so hard that you kill yourself with worry and try to be fearless ,baby steps ,one step at a time its all good and don't worry about what is going to happen none of us will survive lol..Thats suppose to be funny but try to remember that most of what you experience we all do and you will and it will subside and then reappear and then hopefully one day you will make a choice to let it ride the rest of your life in the background or you will just embrace your mortality and not let it scare you anymore.

I feel and face the terrors that each and everyone of you almost on a daily basis and the older you get the more you will experience .Its mostly up to you to decide if it will rule you or you will rule it..I still have days but mostly stare it all in the face and say .. hey its my gain to go the next life..thats when my worries end..after I think that way most of the time it goes away.

Somehow I hope that I have helped someone and also can't help but say "What if this is as good as it gets?" Loved that movie.. lol.. Michael

[pgw84]

Thank you l4a! I don't have anything else to add or say apart from brilliant post! :yesyes:

All the best!

[anxious]

Good post Lokking4answers, thank you. I agree that some of us have to learn to accept how we are and take control.

anx x

[dawny]

thank you a brilliant post.......i keep asking.....will there be light at the end of this tunnel....a day where i wont be afraid........thanks for the hope

[PUGLETMUM]

:hugs: i agree with you totally, thankyou for posting, all the best to you:flowers:

[flinty90]

Well that post has given me an absolute kick up the backside, thank you for your words i feel they could have changed my life.

[Jabz]

i do agree with your post. and although you can never truly get rid of anxiety, i am pretty sure you can subside it.

anxiety exists in everyone of us, every person you see on the street has some sort of anxiety..it can be certain fears, it can be just stress, it can be what we have..panic attacks, etc. but everyone is capable of brining out anxiety in thesmelves, and because of that all of us with anxiety are also able to subdue it once its out.

it takes a lot of time, but i find that day in and day out, as i worry about everyday things my anxiety passes. its only when i worry about anxiety that i am anxious, which sort of makes sense.

its all about accepting who you are and the fact that you have it. once you accept it, you have to let it ride shotgun and not in the drivers seat, and eventually you will forget about it.

[Tom_M]

I agree with Jabz. Your first panic attack can be like opening a Pandora's box, where you develop a life long phobia of fear. But but it needn't be. Most people who suffer from panic are on in a hyper-vigilant state, which means a continues state of readiness. It's like the crew of a warship that is alway on battle station, but never stand down.

Julian Clary - the TV presenter used to suffer from severe panic attacks. I once seen him on live TV with the sweat absolutely dripping from him. He said to the people who where interviewing him that he needs to go off-camera for awhile as he's having a bad panic attack. But he did come back eventually though. I just mentioned that because it just shows that even the coolest looking people have their problems also.

[ceecee]

hi
what a brilliant post
everything you said is totally true!!!!
thanks again

[PUGLETMUM]

:) hi, yeah i agree with tom_m, when your anxiety state starts to subside you get your perspective back and you can see that its just the sheer amount of tension/adrenaline/vigilence that is making you feel so bad. i think if you can get to the point wherefor whatever reason you do actually have an attack(but your not bracing yourself for them constantly),but you just pick yourself up and then carry on(like julian),i think you are pretty much recovered, because you arent letting them interfere with your life anymore. you cant unknow what you know, so i think youve always got the potential tohave a panic, but its how you deal with it/view it that makes a difference.