Painkiller habit

[Ben_lyrical_h]

Hi guys I have been on NMP for years due to health anxiety that started in 2003, I need help coming to terms with the anxiety that now surrounds a paracetamol codeine habit I have had on and off for 17 years now, at one point I was doing 10 - 12 tablets of 30/500mg a day split into doses of 3 tablets every 3 to 4 hours, I sought help for the addiction in 2018 and was clean until my separation of my marriage in 2019, I have relapsed a few times since then and gotten clean and relapsed time and time again.

But I am so worried about my organs now especially my liver, I used to be very fit as a kickboxer and weight lifter, but over the last 6 years have gained weight and not exercised consistently, it doesn't help I used to work in histology and more recently endoscopy as an ATO, I have tried to mitigate the worst of my habit by taking the correct dosage, but you go on Google and it's saying people can die from taking normal amounts for prolonged periods, and other don't, I have had numerous blood work over the years LFTs included and it's never been abnormal.

I am now worried I have permanent damage that my younger body could have healed from, I wish that I had just kept clean and I wouldn't be here now.

My symptoms started with acid and heartburn, bloating, wind, some discomfort in my back/back ache, RUQ discomfort but not tender to prodding around, but now in my mind I am dying a slow death, I have cleaned up my diet now and I am starting to get back to training gently.

But can anyone relate or am I done for.

Cheers guys.

Blessings

[Flapj]

The liver is a very resilient organ. If your LFTs are normal I don't think you have anything to worry about at all.

[Ben_lyrical_h]

The liver is a very resilient organ. If your LFTs are normal I don't think you have anything to worry about at all.
Cheers for the support dude, I'll check in with the doc and get more bloods done.

[NoraB]

Co-codamol is the only drug which takes my migraine pain away, and which I can tolerate. I use them very sparingly and average 6 tablets a month. One prescription lasted me 14 months! I rarely take more than two lots in one 24 hour period. I am as careful as careful can be with this drug. My latest blood tests show that my liver is fine. Not taking the drug when my pain is intolerable will lead to high blood pressure - which I consider to be dangerous. My GP knows I am very low risk of addiction because my carefulness around medications borders on the phobic due to having developed chemical sensitivity. Then there is my hairdresser who is on about 10 a day of the strongest ones (long-term) - for backpain, and she thinks that she's addicted - which she probably is.

As Ben says, the liver is a remarkable organ and as long as your liver function is fine, then I don't think you have anything to worry about there and you can focus on trying to sort out the addiction and why you keep relapsing..

One thing: when you relapse, are you taking the lower dose which you can buy OTC? The other strengths are prescription only aren't they?

[Ben_lyrical_h]

Co-codamol is the only drug which takes my migraine pain away, and which I can tolerate. I use them very sparingly and average 6 tablets a month. One prescription lasted me 14 months! I rarely take more than two lots in one 24 hour period. I am as careful as careful can be with this drug. My latest blood tests show that my liver is fine. Not taking the drug when my pain is intolerable will lead to high blood pressure - which I consider to be dangerous. My GP knows I am very low risk of addiction because my carefulness around medications borders on the phobic due to having developed chemical sensitivity. Then there is my hairdresser who is on about 10 a day of the strongest ones (long-term) - for backpain, and she thinks that she's addicted - which she probably is.

As Ben says, the liver is a remarkable organ and as long as your liver function is fine, then I don't think you have anything to worry about there and you can focus on trying to sort out the addiction and why you keep relapsing..

One thing: when you relapse, are you taking the lower dose which you can buy OTC? The other strengths are prescription only aren't they?

Hi NoraB thanks so much for responding, I have relapsed and used both OTC and prescription based tablets, I have never truly had a bad blood test, I have not been a big drinker in my life either I can go weeks without drinking alcohol, it has been the bain of my existence it truly has.
I have had councilling for the addiction and I guess I should have been more astute when I found myself slipping and sought help, and that is on me.
I am consumed with guilt that I have irreparable harmed myself, because unlike you Nora I have abused these things and even though I have read other peoples addiction stories where they where taking 60! Paracetamol codeine a day for years and survived, I know enough about medicine and the body to know that everyone is different.
I want this to be it now, the end, I want to be done for good and get my health back.
Thank you so much for the support guys 🙏

[NoraB]

Hi NoraB thanks so much for responding, I have relapsed and used both OTC and prescription based tablets, I have never truly had a bad blood test, I have not been a big drinker in my life either I can go weeks without drinking alcohol, it has been the bain of my existence it truly has.

Are the prescription tablets left over? I'm trying to understand how a GP would keep prescribing these to you when you have an addiction? I was refused my repeat prescription at first because the doctor (not my usual) didn't know my history - Doctors are on the case with opiate addiction these days, thankfully.

I watched a programme once where a guy had been addicted to codeine and, unlike you, his tests showed a serious liver issue. This shocked him enough to kick the habit and he was able to completely reverse the liver issue - as I said, the liver is a remarkable organ.

You want this to stop, and, to me, that means you are on step one of recovery.

I've abused alcohol and food in the past, but my organs are still working hard for me. The body is a magnificent machine and is able to heal itself far more than we give it credit for.

Try to look forwards, not back.

All the best to you.