Fear of relaxing, stopping or being alone

[u0000998]

Does anyone have this. Its like soon as I stop doing things or I am sat watching TV or not with anyone that my mind begins to race and the anxiety gets worse? I think thats why I am finding sleep so hard. Its like I am scared of my own mind and thoughts??

I am on my own with this or is this something people recognise?

[madamgg]

Hi there
Your def not on your own with this, i feel exactly the same, am frantically planning my time when i'm not at work so that someone is at home with me or i have a plan for what i'll do if i'm home alone. Unfortunatly anxiety and the crazy thoughts do love a bit of free time to make us feel even worse. Distraction is the key but is easier said than done.
Your so not alone.
J x

[Richie]

no you are not alone on this , i guess most people on this site have these intruding thoughts circling their head, especially at night .
i personally have real morbid stuff seem to attack me !!! i take tranquillisers which helps but never recommend them to anyone!! these thoughts seem to have a life of their own and wont give up :weep: its awful i know. Some people say you should let them in and then try to visualise them as gone gone gone on a passing cloud. To try to distance the emotional harm they do to you.
that is probably pretty good advice because if u put a lid on them/bottle them up they just keep coming and get worse.
Put a day aside and do absolutely nothing, be prepared and let them do their worse!! then let them go go go
take care Richie xxxxxxx

[Sarah Lou]

Hi
I totally understand where your coming from as relaxation has become the hardest thing in the world for me too. I find that if I'm not busy my mind wanders and before I know it I'm having conversations in my head that I don't want as they are always negative....and sometimes I don't even realise I'm doing it and so can't reel the bad thoughts in until the damage is done.

The only thing that helps me at bedtime is reading. I read (anything easy and light - chick lit is good) until my eyes are practically shut with exhaustion as otherwise I lay in bed 'thinking' for ages.
I hope you feel better soon and the thoughts get more positive for you.
Take care
Sarah Lou x

[Bill]

Boredom. We have very active minds so they need constant stimulation so we need to have something to keep our mind engrossed to stop it wandering.

Something like a crossword can help or a puzzle.

Also learn to train the mind to think of happy things. Paint a picture in your mind of waves lapping a beach as you lay there under a hot sun. I know it sounds silly but if you can look into minute detail of the picture you create in your mind, it will stop your mind wandering because it'll be an enjoyable picture. It's like using meditation. Try it when you're laying in bed. Also try imagining walking or driving down imaginary roads.

Sitting with a blank mind is the worst possible situation because the mind looks for something to worry about such as symptoms. If you can learn to train the mind for when you haven't got some engrossing to keep it occupied, then it really does work. It's also helpful to be able to do when you're sitting waiting for a dentist appointment because it takes you away from where you are and the fear you're feeling. I know because I use the technique myself.

Often in strange situations I'll look for something to distract the mind such as a picture on a wall and then analyse every detail to stop me thinking negative thoughts.

[Lilith1980]

I am the same. If my partner is still at work or if he is going out on his own and I have nothing to do but watch TV then I sit there getting more and more anxious about what's going on when I'm not with him.

It all ends up with me thinking he is being unfaithful to me and our relationship is over. All doom and gloom! I always make out to him like everything is normal, I kiss him goodbye and wish him a good evening but once he has gone, after a few hours I am freaking out :-(

I bought some exercise DVDs to get me out of the lethargy I have been feeling lately and it takes up some time and makes me feel better. I guess the real test will come when my partner goes out on his own again (which isnt very often to be fair) but it still triggers the same extreme reaction.