carriewriting
12-02-21, 13:08
Normally Christmas is my worst time of year, but I've just had my birthday and my HA has been in double overdrive all week.
Every day I've lurched from one thing to the next in what is a disappointing new record for me (which is saying something because last year I thought I'd reached my peak of hyper-vigilance/catatrophising)
I feel like I know so much about health anxiety, and yet I still feel so powerless against the pull of the adrenaline when these scary thoughts come.
I actually had a pretty good birthday, despite my brain's best efforts to ruin it. I'm exhausted now though. It feels like I've had the longest week ever fighting all these fears. I also had a 15 days cycle which probably hasn't helped the craziness (the joys of perimenopause).
Anyway, that's my pity party. At least my birthday is over with now and I also have therapy next week.
*Edited to remove details of what health things I've been worrying about as that was me giving in to the temptation to seek reassurance.
Every day I've lurched from one thing to the next in what is a disappointing new record for me (which is saying something because last year I thought I'd reached my peak of hyper-vigilance/catatrophising)
I feel like I know so much about health anxiety, and yet I still feel so powerless against the pull of the adrenaline when these scary thoughts come.
I actually had a pretty good birthday, despite my brain's best efforts to ruin it. I'm exhausted now though. It feels like I've had the longest week ever fighting all these fears. I also had a 15 days cycle which probably hasn't helped the craziness (the joys of perimenopause).
Anyway, that's my pity party. At least my birthday is over with now and I also have therapy next week.
*Edited to remove details of what health things I've been worrying about as that was me giving in to the temptation to seek reassurance.