View Full Version : Agoraphobia - The Diary
Hi All,
As you know I decided to ditch my meds and go it alone with the battle to beat the agoraphobia.
I have decided to do a daily diary on here to give me the incentive to push myself each day, and hopefully it will encourage others to give it a go too.
So if anyone wants to join me on the thread posting what they have done each day and how they have felt whilst doing it, their thoughts, ideas, well basically anything, please do so, as it may make it easier for us all.
So here goes :
Monday - I waited till it was dark and said I would walk to the top of the road and wait for Ami who walks home from work, Erin (my youngest) came with me along with the dog. The walk to the top of the road wasn't too bad, so we walked a little way along the alley to stand and wait for Ami, thats when I started to feel jittery and could feel the anxiety building. Two little old people decided to stop for a chat, I had to stand and make polite conversation, when really I wanted to shout at them to 'go away cause im finding this soooo hard'. Eventually they said bye and walked away .......... phew relief. Still no sign of Ami and Erin is asking me 'are you ok mum, how do you feel mum, are you sure your ok mum', bless her she was just being concerned but I wanted to yell at her to be quiet your making me think of it even more. After another couple of minutes I couldnt stand there any longer, the feeling of passing out just got too much, I passed the dog to Erin and said quick Ive got to go, and I literally ran home, Erin and Kai trailing behind, and Ami still no where in sight. Once indoors all the usual panic feelings started to subside and the tears started to flow, poor Ami walked in doors to a quivering wreck of a mother. I rang a friend (thanks Zinn) and just ranted, how much I hated this, why is something so simple so hard to do, until i finally calmed back down, but I felt shattered for the rest of the evening.
Tuesday - I waited for Ami to come home from work this time, then asked her if she would walk with me, which she said suprised her after the state I was in on monday.
So armed with the dog, we walked to the top of the road, which again was fine, then down the side of the houses, and back down the back alley, this wasnt too bad because its pitch black and I felt safer, although Ami was saying if anyone jumps out on us mum im blaming you for dragging us down the alleyway lol. Made it to the back gate and indoors in once peice without having to run this time. My breathing was all over the place and I felt shattered again for the rest of the evening.
So this evening I will do the same walk as yesterday and see how it goes.
Im going to keep doing this short walk each evening until I can do it without worrying about it, then progress to a slightly longer walk, then so on etc.
So come on all you agoraphobics lets beat this once and for all lol
Love
Trac xxxx
I will willing join in on this progress report Trac, as this year has been a much better one for my agoraphobia than last year was.
I can actually start on a positive too (although hearing the difficult days and how people manage those is even more helpful sometimes isn't it).
I went for lunch to a good mate of mines (finally ran out of excuses) she came and picked me up, I had planned to just stay an hour or so and ended up staying 3 hours.
I didn't go without anxiety but I went willing to work with it and I was gonna tell her if I felt crap cos I knew she would bring me home if I wanted.
I did feel panicky a few times (cos its a new house I havent been to yet and I haven't 'done lunch' in ages) but I just tried to let go by relaxing my shoulders and tummy muscles.
Anyway we had a good old goss and the time flew by - I am so pleased I went and it did me the world of good. Agoraphobia can be so flipping isolating can't it.
Keep going Trac and this is the very best part of the year to start - with all the dark nights. It was last Dec after watching 'The house of Agoraphobics' and me laying on the pavement lol that evening that things seemed to slightly turn around.
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hey Trac..
Well done with your achievement last night! Agoraphobia is a right b***ard.
I did okayish today. I took my son to school and as normal i start gasping for air on the way home, so instead of running like a loon (causing me to become breathless, so NOT the best thing), i walked slooooooooooowly. I DIDN'T PASS OUT OR ANYTHING...lol.
Mum picked me up for work...fine
I needed to chat to my son's teacher....fine
Went to Tescos...fine
Looked for a Christmas Tree...fine
A pretty fine day.
Onwards and upwards.
Tomorrow is my son's nativity. Well, they are doing a production of "Jonah", instead of the normal Christmas play.
Fingers crossed for that one.
GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR WALK TONIGHT :)
x
Hi all,
I hope you don't mind me joining this thread.
I'm not doing so well at the moment. The anxiety is pretty bad and I'm having problems with my neighbours which isn't helping. They play non stop music which I can hear in every room of my house and I can hear it over the TV and even over my own music. It's so hard to ignore it and there is nowhere I can go to get away from it. I'm on edge all the time just waiting for it to start or get louder. Grrrrrrrr.
Anyway, regarding the agoraphobia, I have taken the dog for a walk every day this week which is really good for me (as well as for him)! I have been out in the daylight and in the dark. It's easier in the dark because I feel that nobody will notice me, but I quite enjoyed taking the dog out when it was light because I could go down by the river (where I'd never go in the dark) and let him off the lead to run about. I haven't been brave enough to go into Tesco by myself yet, but I've walked past it every day and peered inside. Eeeeek. It's always so busy!!!
I phoned the Doctors to get a repeat prescription and I need to pick up my meds from the chemist on Monday. I will have to walk there in daylight and join a big queue as it's always busy in there. I'm nervous thinking about it already (gulp)!
It's great to hear how everyone is doing.
Good luck everyone! :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
honeybee3939
07-11-07, 18:33
Good Luck wishes to you all too !:hugs:
What a fab thread Trace, you can do it my friend, and it looks like you are making progress already.:yesyes: :yesyes:
Well done to the others that have made progress too, be proud of yourselves:hugs:
love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxx
Piglet, a big well done mate on what you achieved today, doesn't it feel good to go out and be sociable, and actually enjoy it, I'm not too bad at going to someone's house as long as im picked up and dropped home again, kind of like being a child again lol.
Bluebell, well done on everything you did today, you did brilliant and good luck at your sons nativity play tomorrow, let us know how it goes :yesyes:
Shoe, your more than welcome to join in the thread the more the merrier, you do really well with the walking, thats one of my fears and something I really do need to get over.
Well tonight Ami got in from work and I ushered her straight back out the door again as i was waiting dog in hand to do my walk lol. Tonight it was not so bad again, I was not even puffing and panting when I got home, so I pottered around before sitting down, then I sat here thinking hang on why am I not feeling all out of breath and panicky ???? flippin cant win worry when my breathing is all over the place, worry when it isn't lol.
Will see what tomorrow has instore, good luck for tomorrow everyone
Love
Trac xxx
Andrea thanks matey, I was posting the same time as you lol, any advice would be most welcome because your a star and have done so well :yesyes:
Love
Trac xxx
honeybee3939
07-11-07, 18:38
Trace
Think we posted at the same time....lol
WELL DONE for todays acheivement too:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Andrea
xxxx
Andrea,
will you stop that, we did it again lol, thanks mate
Love
Trac xxxx
Way To Go Everbody. Keep up the good work. Am so proud of yall.
Trac, I thought I was nuts, until you mentioned that night time was easier for you. I never put it together, it's because nobody can see me.
Look forward to tomorrows post.
Whoo Hoo Trac what BRILL post:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
I will be following everyones progress with great interest :shades:
Cmon Peeps you can do it!!!!!!:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
I don't suffer from agoraphobia but just want to give all you lovely people hugs and positive vibes :yesyes: but know you can all do it by taking wee steps cos your all just fab :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: xxxxx
well done you!! i too am agoraphobic and having a pretty bad time at the moment thanks to a stress overload. to be honest im surprised im not bed bound!!!! its only my sense of humour and family that keep me afloat. i will join this thread and youre right, maybe it will help encourage and support each other. ju x
Thanks Believe, Kazz and Mandy, its lovely for us to have the support.
Julie, thats brilliant thats your going to join the thread :yesyes: I am the same as you its my girls and my sense of humour that keeps me going and its definately my girls who keep my spirits up. Post anything you feel like on here, any steps you have taken no matter how small you may think they are, because loads of small steps will take us a long way, rant if you need to, or just generally ramble on lol.
Love
Trac xxxx
You all really inspired me! I'm agoraphobic and after reading Trac post I was determined to try & go out on my own, which is huge for me cause I haven't been out on own for over 3 years now! The more I thought about doing it, the worse my panic got, until in the end, I got so angry with it I just grabbed my coat and keys & went out the door, before I knew it, I had walked half way down the road, only a couple of minutes, but I was overwhelmed!
I turned round and came home and as soon as I walked through the door floods of tears, couldn't believe what I had just done! I was shaking and crying but I was so pleased with what I had done! Can't believe it still!! Gona try again today but will have to do the same as yesterday, just grab my coat and do it, otherwise the more I think about it, the worse the panic & anxiety gets. I didn't tell my husband or family, I feel that if I do, I HAVE to do it again, but I know they would all be so pleased with me, silly really, do you all feel like that?
Thanks for this motivation!!
Lol - go us!!! :yesyes:
Love Piglet :flowers:
I'm too agoraphobic i never go out alone ive been like this for some years now and got to the stage where it upsets me of having to rely on my partner all the time.
Im trying my best to keep meeting my therapst every fews days at the end of my street i find it so hard to get out of my own front door alone ive never done that until i had this therapst come see me....the other day she said she would meet me at the bus stop on my street just knowin that i had to walk out the door alone and walk a few steps to the bus stop made me go into a right panic my partner kept on telling me you will be fine if it was any other day i would of walked you there but that wont help you !
Ive got to meet her further down the street on monday really scared about doin that just being out alone and knowing ppl are there makes me feel ill !
im really trying to beat this my therapst keeps telling me im too young to be in the house lol
lets hope the motivation from everyone here helps me keep going thanks guys xoxox
Becky....WELL DONE :)
Nicki....It may be distressing but keep in mind that despite that you are STILL doing it. You should be proud of yourself for that.
Today is my son's Nativity play.
Sweaty hands...check
Breathless...Check
Scared....Check
Dizziness...Check
Good to go then!!!!
Wish me luck.
purplehaze
08-11-07, 13:08
I have started meeting a friend for walks in the park and it has been a grest help..I have to make my own way there but knowing that I am meeting someone I trust is a Great support. The panics come and go like the waves coming in and out but our conversation is never on how I feel which is therapy in itself....Well done everyone for all your dong xx
thanks bluebell ill keep on trying :) xoxox
bottleblond
08-11-07, 13:34
Trac....WELL DONE GAL!!!
Ok this seems like a brilliant idea but i haven't been able to get out much today as i have the plasterers in, but so far i have taken Ben to school then on to the local shop to pick up some bits and bobs.
I took Ben back to school after lunch time was over and went straight to my friend Lynettes for a cupa, she lives right next to me so that was no big deal.
Tomorrow i HAVE to go shopping :wacko: :wacko: so will let you know how it goes.
Trac your a star for what you have done so far :flowers:
Lisa
xxx
Wow im made up so many of you have decided to join the thread, thats pure motivation in itself, so thankyou all :yesyes:
Becky, how well did you do eh ???? thats brilliant, i totally relate to how it makes us so much worse if we sit about and think about it before doing it, hell ive been known to walk down the street in me pink fluffy slippers, purely because ive just suddenly felt the need to try it there and then, (ive just realised now why the neighbours always look at my feet as i leave the house now lol) Well you proved nothing was going to happen to you by going out the front door so now remind yourself of this and work with it, dont push yourself too far to fast, even making it out the front door is a huge achievement so do what you feel you can, and carry on with that until you can do it comfortably, then do a few steps more, way to go mate :hugs:
Nicki, thats excellent that your managing to get out of the house alone now, I find if i look for something to focus on ahead of me I can ignore anything else thats going on around me, have a few practices before monday even if it is just walking to the next house and back, the more you do it the easier it becomes, let us know how you get on :hugs:
Bluebell, good luck for today mate, hope it goes well for you and rememeber focus on your son and you will forget the anxiety :hugs:
Purplehaze, its great you have a friend you can meet to go walking with, having the support is a great help, and its brilliant you are able to walk there alone :hugs:
Lisa, thanks mate xxx excuse me how can you say you havent done much today lol what you have done today would have taken me a week to just pluck up the courage to try lol, good luck with the shopping tomorrow, I think ive forgotten what the inside of a supermarket looks like for the time being lol, let us know how it goes mate :hugs:
Well I for one wont be doing my walk later in my fluffy slippers as its windy and raining here, trainers and an umbrella me thinks for later ............. hmm thats if me brolly hasnt seized from lack of use lol, will post once I have been later and let you know how it goes .......... one thing ive noticed today though I do seem to be more energetic, maybe i was starting to seize up along with me brolly lol
Lots of love
Trac xxxx
I've also been inspired by you, Trac, and took 5 minutes walk up the road and back today, a little breathless but felt an achievment. I'm looking forward to hearing about how you get on,cheers.
thanks trac :) ill update on how i get on !
my younger sister going in hospital on that monday too to have her baby she will be having a c section so worrying over that ! will be going to see her with my dad after ive been out with my theapist ! hospitals make me panic just the smell and feel closed in so hope that goes ok lol !! xoxox
Sagey, thats brilliant, way to go I am so happy for you :hugs: what an achievement, you proved you could do it, so use this and work on it, do the walk each day until you can do it comfortably, and then increase the distance, let us know how you get on each day, so we can all motivate one another to keep going :)
Nikki, give your sister all our best wishes, a new baby how exciting, dont forget to practice before seeing your therapist monday, good luck mate xxx
I went for my walk this evening, even the wind and rain didn't put me off, ok so I looked a bit daft in cut off jeans and a rain coat walking along side my daughter who was wrapped up for a monsoon lol. Today I found it slightly easier again, although I do find myself being breathless, which I know is from being anxious, but im not getting the light headed dizzy feeling on the walk now, and I can chat whilst walking instead of wanting to say shut up dont talk to me :blush: I think I will carry on with this distance until monday and then increase it and see how that feels :)
Hope everyone else has had a good day too
Lots of love
Trac xxx
Wow All Jobs Well Done! I am so proud of you all. I know how hard you each are trying, keep up the good work.
I will check back each day to see your reports.
I don't have agoraphobia, but I do know it's scarey with anxiety, so lets all kick butt.
tarce (:winks: ), i of course mean trace:D .
this idea of yours to keep a running log is a wonderful move. if anything helping you to articulate thoughts and feelings and have a journal to look back on and chart progress is a very positive decision.
you seem to be doing really well and i have faith that you will keep on doing better and better.
of course there will be occaisional set backs, there always are in everything in life, but dont lets this get to you. usually we always see the short term and focus on the now, but i know youll see the gradual upwards trend looking back over this.
and remember, im write behind you and if you stop ill let the lion out of the cage... so RUUUUN FORREST, RRUUUUUUUUNUNNNNNN:winks:
seriously though well done trace.
youre one of my best friends and ive got all the faith in the world in you :yesyes:
Believe, thanks for your encouragement, its lovely to have non agoraphobia sufferers giving us the motivation too, so it is really appreciated :hugs:
Jole ...... oops me means Joel :doh: thanks for the nice words honey, just one thing though .........RUN????? bleeding 'ell let us get the hang of the walking first lol, seriously though thankyou cause your always there when I need a mate, and your one of the best :hugs:
Love
Trac xxx
honeybee3939
08-11-07, 19:17
Hi All
Lovely to read about your successful day !!:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Trace thats a brill idea about going a little futhur on Monday:) .
The wind and rain would have certainly put me off today Trace, good for you for having the determination to go ahead!
WELL DONE TO everyone else too, i know myself how hard this can be for you all, your all doing Fab:yesyes: KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK PEEPS !!
Love and hugs
Andrea
xxxxxxxx
:yesyes:
Trac,
I don't know a lot about Agoraphobia (my anx is health anx) so this is a really good way to show other people exactly what you are going through and how hard things can be!
Well Done with the walks - sounds like you are determined :)
Keep postin and keep up the good work :)
little mutt
08-11-07, 19:53
Congratulations Trac on your walks. Keep it up. Like you say, just keep repeating the same walk over and over again until you feel totally comfortable with it. When I was working on beating my agoraphobia I used to always go to the supermarket etc in the dark. It worked for me and now I can go in the daylight too, yes it may take time but the more you do it the easier it will get. All the best x
Well...what can i say......BRILLIANT IDEA TRACE. And i cant be seen to be left out..cause i is agoraphobic too ya know. So, here goes.
Thurs: 8th Nov.
Did F**k All....but i feel great.
Can i start tomorrow!!!!
Well seeing as its you Andrew and me luvs ya, yup you can start tomorrow honey lol
Andrea, thanks again for your support mate xxx
Claire, thankyou for your words of encourgement xx
Little mutt, thats so great to hear how well you have dealt with your agoraphobia, if you have any tips or words or wisdom feel free to post away lol
Love
Trac xxx
Well it's great to hear how everyone is doing.
I've spent the whole day cleaning the house and doing a bit of online shopping. It rained all afternoon so I had to walk the dog in the dark this evening. I had to walk past quite a few people out with their dogs but it didn't make me feel too anxious this time. Tomorrow I need to post a Birthday card before 5pm though, so I'll HAVE to go out in daylight (gulp)! Tut... that means I'll have to do my hair and put my slap on, LOL!
Good luck everyone. :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Thanks everyone, Bluebell and Trac for your encouragement!! I'm still in shock myself cause I managed to get out again today, can't believe it. Did the same as yesterday, didn't plan when I was going out, I just did it!
Trac - was thinking about what you said, just opening the street door and going outside on my own was a massive step for me, but I was determined to try & walk as far as I did yesterday, you did make me laugh about the slippers, neighbours must think I'm mad too cause I was talking to myself, I was trying to think of anything but what I was actually doing.
Felt absolutely exhausted again when I got back, felt dizzy, sick, anxious, scared but still couldn't get over what I've done in 2 days, more than past 3 years! Want to tell my family sooo much, but I'm so scared to. I know its stupid cause they'd be so pleased but I just feel like I don't want to put extra pressure on myself at mo, sorry, I'm waffling, but it helps!
Its great reading how everyone's getting on, lets keep fighting!! I'm certainly going to try and hey, nothing happened, I'm still here!
Shoe, good luck for tomorrow mate, I always wear sunglasses if i leave the house during the day they are like my security blanket, but it also means i dont have to wear me mascara lol, let us know how it goes :hugs:
Becky, oh mate im so proud you did it again today, thats just the best news :yesyes: it is so tiring doing it because of all the adrenalin we use just to get out the front door, but the more we do it the less tiring it gets. Why not suprise your family and say to them watch this and get them to watch you out of the window as you walk out the front door and past the house, Oh I wish I could see their faces, or get then to read your posts on here, they are going to be so proud of you, I find my children knowing I am doing it helps me because they encourage me heaps and always give me a hug each time ive done it, just remember though if one day you cant manage it, it doesnt mean you have failed it just means you need a day off and your gonna get back out there again the next day, I am soooo behind you mate, I think im more excited for you than I am for myself lol
Good luck for tomorrow everyone
Love
Trac xxxxx
groovygranny
08-11-07, 22:39
WOOOOOOOOOW !!
WELL, I'M NOT AGROPHOBIC BUT I WOULDN'T HAlf MIND COMING ON NOW AND AGAIN TO GIVE YOU LOT LOADS OF HUGS!!
YOU ARE ALL BRILLIANT - AND I'M VERY GLAD TO 'KNOW' YOU !!!
http://content.sweetim.com/sim/cpie/emoticons/0002011D.gif (http://www.sweetim.com/s.asp?im=gen&ref=10) xxx xxx xxx
I would like to join this thread also, I think its a great idea.
I too am trying to beat this agoraphobia. Today I left my comfort zone and managed to walk for 30 minutes, with my husband and the dogs. I am also managing to go into shops and stay with the panic whereas before I used to leave my husband to pay for the goods. It is difficult to see the panic through but you do get better at it as time goes on. Tomorrow I plan to go on the same walk without my husband coz I am going to beat this.
Good luck everyone WE CAN DO THIS
Carol
xxxxxxxx
Thanks GG the more encouragement we get the better :hugs:
Carol, so pleased to see you have joined us and a huge well done on your achievements today :yesyes: good luck for you walk tomorrow way to go :) and let us know how it goes.
Love
Trac xxxx
A MASSIVE WELL DONE FOR EVERYONE'S ACCOMPLISHMENTS TODAY :)
My son's nativity went okay. I couldn't see him, he was way at the back behind about 50 other children, rather annoyed about that. I was breathless and i DID feel anxious. I sat in the front row but i could see the exits, so i was okay to leave if i had to, but i didn't.
Here is a picture of my wee man http://maybeican.blogspot.com We weren't allowed to take photos of the actual play because of the child protection law.
Tomorrow is grocery shopping day.......arghhhhhhhhhh!!!
I WILL DO IT, I WILL BE OKAY.
Wish me luck and send me positive thoughts please.
x
WAY TO GO BLUEBELL, you went and you stayed, that deserves a massive pat on the back :yesyes:
Good luck for tomorrow with the shopping, there was one good point to going shopping when i could still manage it when i was anxious, I was in such a rush to get in and out, I never over spent, it was in get everything on my list, pay and out again lol.
Love
Trac xxx
Quiet-Lift
08-11-07, 23:43
Hi everyone...:)
Is this post about Agoraphobia? Can I blow my own trumpet here...just for a moment?
I went out to M&S yesterday and bought a Lambswool Sweater, a copy of The Big Issue from a vendor outside and pulled some cash out of an ATM (legally).
Also bought a book on decorating and picked up a What's On list from my local cinema...also went to Tesco.
Today...went to see my Psychiatrist at the CMHT...went to Tesco and got my prescription. Also bought a few things.
It's a start. I'm sure I could do more but I don't want to get shop-happy and start buying things I don't really need. The important thing is being OUT THERE with other ordinary people doing relatively ordinary things and not isolating myself.
Just to let you know...Men also get Agoraphobia.
It's more than an inconvenience in my case, it's also a b****y tragedy, because I can still remember when I used to be able to go anywhere ( even areas where I had never been ) without feeling vulnerable or oversensitive or panic-stricken.
Please excuse the rant. You all have my admiration for any advances made.
It's not easy moving out of your own comfort zone into the unknown.:yesyes:
Thanks for the hugs GG:hugs:
Great webpage Bluebell:yesyes:
Just go at your own pace
No need to hurry, No need to race...:flowers:
xxxx
Allan,
Your more than welcome to join the diary along with all the rest, the more the merrier :yesyes:
well done on your achievements today you did extremely well.
Of course its not only woman who are agoraphobic we all realise that and i understand where your coming from because I too remember a time when I could do what I wanted when I wanted without a care in the world, hell I took 3 kids under the age of 11 out to Florida on my own to meet my then husband who was working out there i spent the whole 2 weeks driving everywhere going to every theme park possible and then bringing the children home again on a flight that we had to change in Miami, now a walk around the block is a mission in itself.
I guess we can all remember a time when we could do these things and thats what makes it so much harder now because we want to get back there again.
Take care
Trac xxx
Quiet-Lift
09-11-07, 01:20
Hi Trac:)
Thanks for your response.
Hope I didn't cause any offense with that remark about Men and Agoraphobia. My horizon's can be rather limited sometimes.
Goodness! I'm astonished and humbled by what you've told me. I've never done anything as adventurous as a trip to Florida with 3 children under the age of 11...!:ohmy:
I can understand how difficult and frustrating it must be for you now and
truly hope you get to where you want to go.
Life can be so cruel...:weep:
Good luck at your end. You have my support:yesyes:
Best wishes
xxx
Remembering things..
I remember a time if i stayed indoors i would panic!!! I would HAVE to go out.
I remember the time when i flew to Australia and stayed there for 6 weeks.
Now, i can barely get out the door and walk 2 minutes without "dying"!
x
Thanks Trac - you made me cry!! I think I will show them at the weekend when they're all here, I think they'll pass out lol!! I'm sooo nervous!!
Woke up this morning and boy do I ache from head to toe, especially my back and shoulders, I feel like I've run a marathon, can't believe how much I ache! But I felt so much better in myself when I woke up this morning, I got up and made my hubby breakfast in bed, you should have seen the look on his face lol!! (normally I just pull the duvet cover back over my head when the alarm goes off and he sees himself off to work!) First thing he said is "Wots goin on??!" lol!! I just replied, I feel like its gona be a good day - haven't seen him go off to work so happy for ages, thats given me a big boost too!!!!
I'm gona try and go out again today, may not make it as far cause I feel exhausted, but I'm not giving in!!
Good luck everyone today!!
hi trac,
i know your post was from yesterday, but i wanted to tell you and everyone else who has been out today..................
i think you are so wonderful and should be so proud of yourselves.
wow trac, you didn't let anything stand in your way and that is just brilliant.
being strong towards the anxiety and pa's...empowers you, the fear has nowhere to go if you stand up to it, its liking constantly taking a bully everywhere with you......only now you are doing the bullying......
go for it trac, i love a success story......and you are giving hope to eveyone out there who is suffering.....
i hope you dont mind me giving my two penny worth.....but your a great
thinking of you trac
love and cuddles dawny x
Well done everyone - it's lovely to read this stuff and know that other people feel exactly the same as you!!!
Lol Trac I never got quite as far as Florida but I did take the 3 piglets to Torquay years ago when they were little - much like taking a herd of naughty goats really!!! :yesyes:
Piglet :flowers:
Hello All,
I am sooooooooooo happy for each one of you. You all are doing soooooooooooo great. I know that you all are going to beat this.
Here are some tips that I use when I am out and about:
1. I count the number of dogs I see.
2. I count the number of women walking dogs revises men.
( I have noticed more women then men)
3. I watch the clouds, try to make shapes, I know this is hard to do at night, but once you go out in the daytime.Maybe you could look at the stars.
4. This is my all time best: I say screw you anxiety and panic, I am no different then the rest. You don't own me, I own you.
5. I am on the look out for skateboards, here they are everywhere including my son. They tend to run you over,if you aren't careful.
I hope that those help some.Keep up all the hard work.
Hi all,
I want to say a huge well done to each and every one of you because you're all doing so well. :hugs: :yesyes:
http://i117.photobucket.com/albums/o62/selectschool/Animated%20Graphics/congratulations.gif
This thread is a brilliant idea Trac, it gives people a place to offer support, encouragement and a record of their achievements. It basically embodies everything about you and I'm so proud of all the hard work you've done this week.
I'm really looking forward to following the progress of this thread.
Take care,
Mike :)
PS Piglet did you stay at Fawlty Towers? Did you? Did you? :D
Ive briefly read everyones stories...and all i can say is....WELL DONE EVERYONE. It is amazing what we can do with a little encouragement.
When i read yours BeckC about seeing your husband go to work with a smile on his face...it brought a tear to my eye. Our restricting our anxiety is. It makes us lose faith, confidence and we sometimes feel we are not even worthy of being on this planet. Yet, it is only anxiety....and not a contagious disease.
I now am open about my anxiety and no longer hide it. With that, I have found some people accept it...some dont....some understand it..some dont have a clue.
Anyway, heres me diary so far:
Friday 9th Nov 07
Woke up, gave my gonads a right good scratch. Got ready and took the dogs out into the park. This time, i went even further into the park and you know what.... i didnt feel anxious...but my mind kept saying i should be.
Anyway, got talking to another dog owner who had a voice box on due to throat cancer (talk about health anxiety) i could feel the panic coming on and me suddenly thinking i probably had throat cancer coming too. However, negative thoughts only....its my actions that count. So, off i went further into the park and i felt great. Played for ages with my dogs in the fallen leaves. Brilliant.
When i got in. I fed my dogs and realised i needed something from the shop...and guess what...i didnt bother going to the local shop...no..not me...i only had to drive further away to the co-op (main trigger shop before) and i stood at the cash point (in a queue..thinking i would run) got my cash...went into the shop...bought lots of stuff...and then waited...yes waited patiently at the checkout with 6 people in front of me (normally a trigger for panic and leave) I felt the anxiety coming on....and just at that point...they put another person on the checkout....god...how cool i felt...i walked out of the shop so calm...even looked around and said to myself 'God, thank you for letting me feel part of this earth again'
Anyway, im back at home now having a coffee. Gonna get in my car later and take my daughter to the swings (gulp) and do my daily driving and see if i can get further.
Rant finished....gonads scratched again...the end
Hi everyone,
It's great to hear us all doing so well. :yesyes:
Today I had to walk to my local Tesco to post a Birthday card in the postbox outside. I had to go in daylight because I needed to get it posted on time. I had a bit of a panic before I left because I couldn't find a first class stamp and I thought I was going to have to join a big Tesco queue to get some (gulp), but luckily I found some in a drawer. I'm not ready to do shopping on my own as queues are the most difficult thing for me. So, I did my hair, put a bit of slap on (and trust me, I needed to, LOL), took a deep breath and took the dog with me on my mission. Well, I was a bit anxious and had butterflies in my tummy, but other than that I was fine. I even went home the long way, taking the dog for a nice long walk by the river. I saw quite a few dog walkers but I felt fine, probably because I didn't feel trapped.
I'm not sure if I'm going out at all this weekend, but I'll update you if anything exciting happens (it's thrills every minute here, LOL)!!!
Keep on trying everyone. :)
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Ohh where do i start lol, well firstly it isnt dark yet so I havent been on my mission, thats for later on lol, feel really tired today and the anxiety seems to be on a high, its having a go at me i think cause im beginning to attack it, well its not going to get the better of me this time lol.
Allan, no offence was taken at all, your more than welcome to post any thoughts, rants, feelings, tips, well pretty much anything you like on here, thanks for your words of support :yesyes:
Bluebell, strange isnt it how our lives can do a complete turn around, i used to be a parcel courier, so was always out and about, I hated being at home if I could be out doing something, I sometimes think to myself 'how the feck did I get here, how did that happen?' oh to have all the answers eh lol :hugs:
Becky, reading your posts always puts a huge smile on my face, the enthusiasm just seems to flow from what you type, I would love to be able to capture the moment your husband sees you walk out of the house, that would definately be a photo for the album, hope your walk went well today and im sooooo looking forward to reading an update tomorrow :hugs:
Dawny thankyou so much for all the kind words, maybe I started this thread but it wouldnt be anywhere near as powerful without everyone elses's determination and drive thats being put into it, i am so glad I decided to do it now, I didnt realise something so simple would encourage so many :hugs:
Piglet, i dont think it matters where you go taking 3 little ones with you is a task within its self and who ever invented the phrase ' are we there yet' needs shooting lol :hugs:
Believe, thankyou so much for the tips, distration is a great thing when your feeling anxious :hugs:
Mike, thanks for the lovely words and encouragement, and thankyou for all the support you give me on MSN, your a star and a good friend to me :hugs:
Zinn, what can I say lol, firstly im so glad I aint a man and have to wake up and do that every morning, I prefer a cup of tea meself lol, you are doing so well, I remember a time not so long ago, when you had to ring me everytime you left the house, and now you are doing so much and your able to do it without someone on the end of the phone, keep doing what your doing, because your definately cracking it this time babe :hugs:
Shoe, a big well done for today, doesnt it feel good to do your hair and put on some slap for a reason lol, your going to have such a well walked dog soon lol hope you have a great weekend and manage to get out and about :hugs:
I shall be back later once ive been for my walk, well done everyone for today your all doing brilliant :yesyes:
Love
Trac xxxxx
Not one of my best days today but even so I still achieved.
Walked into town with Mum and little one this morning felt quite anxious today but decided to go anyway. Went into Bakers with my boy and had a huge panic but decided to stay and see it through, was quite tricky but really proud of myself afterwards. Did another few shops then went to visit my mother-in-law, met my daughter there and managed to stay an hour. Walked home and felt good with myself, these were the things that seemed impossible for me to do a few weeks back and although they are still quite painful to do Im doing them anyway.
Good luck all and well done with all our achievements.
Tonight I am going out alone with my dog and I can do this.
Lorac - I just wanted to say well done for doing so much today. I know it's really hard.
I still haven't been brave enough to go back to the vets by myself after I had a really bad attack in there and embarassed myself by having to sit down with everyone looking at me. :ohmy:
And Trac - Good luck for the walk tonight. I don't know about having a well walked dog, but I can tell you all this walking is doing wonders for my cellulite! :blush:
Oh, and Zinn - where did the other dog come from? I think I've missed something, LOL! You're doing great by the way!
Everyone here is doing so well. Keep it up everyone! :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Hellooooooo!
Did the grocery shopping. Everything was fine until 4 aisles from the end and i had a mini wave of panic desend. I wanted to bolt......
BUT I DIDN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I kept thinking, sh*t, i have got an awful lot of shopping today, that is going to take ages to checkout, which it did and then we had mums to pack too.
I am still alive.
After i left the shop we had to contend with the rush hour traffic jams...
I WAS FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tomorrow is a day of nothing :)
Sunday - work day!
x
Lorac, wow well done you :yesyes: your a strong person to stand your ground whilst the panic hits, that is the best way to fight it and im so impressed. Enjoy your walk with the dog tonight, good job we all have dogs isnt it lol :hugs:
Shoe, isnt it mad that we do avoid the places we have our worst panic attacks in, we should by rights going straight back to them and proving that there is nothing to be afraid of ............. oh if only it was that easy lol
Love
Trac xxx
OMG! I'm having a panic attack!
I just had a bath and put a little dress on because I'm expecting visitors... and I was stood in front of the mirror applying my blusher... when I saw something on my shoulder. I dropped my blusher which smashed on the floor*, and I quickly stepped out of my dress. I composed myself, and shook the dress... and the BIGGEST FATTEST SPIDER I HAVE EVER SEEN ran across the bathroom floor. :ohmy: Needless to say, I whacked it with my slipper and quickly flushed it down the loo. Well now I'm sitting here topless and shaking like a leaf, LOL! I can honestly say that it was like one of those plastic Halloween bugs, only it was REAL. :mad: I'm too scared to put any clothes on now in case it happens again! I don't have a phobia of spiders - I can usually put a glass over them and put them outside, but this was a BEAST! Anyway, the shock has brought on a full blown panic attack (I know, it doesn't take much these days) so I'm sitting here trying to calm down.
*Oh well, at least I now have an excuse to buy myself some new makeup! :D
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
EEEwwwww i think that would give even the calmest of people a panic attack having a flippin great spider fall on them:ohmy:
Hope your managing to calm down now mate,:hugs: and dont slippers come in useful sometimes, walking down the street in, beating spides to death with lol
Love
Trac xxx
Oh I hate spiders Shoe and have had the same experience so have some hugs from me.
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Hope you feel calmer soon,
Mike x
Mike you never told me you wore a dress and applied blusher................ cor I learn something new everyday talking to you LMAO
Love
Trac xxx
Lol Trace!!!
Well I'm sitting down with a cup of tea to steady my nerves. :wacko:
I thought the spider thing was an urban legend until it happened to me! I mean I never really thought one would sit on my shoulder like a bleedin' parot! I'm pretty sure it didn't drop on me, which means it was sitting on my shoulder for a good 10 minutes while I was pottering!
Lol, I rang my sister to tell her what happened and she said it wasn't really news. I said it IS news if you're agoraphobic! But yeh, I know I need to get out more! :shrug:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
I went for a 5 minute walk agian today, in the dark this time. I've been feeling weird and had strange back and stomach all day so I didn't think I'd feel like going out, however, I did and thought of all you guys as I walked - all of us with the same objective. Thank you all for your strength and humour.
WELL DONE EVERYONE:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
I havent been around for a couple of days and its taken me ages to read all these brilliant posts:yesyes:
You are all doing soooo well:shades:
And Trac what a brill idea this post is!!!!!:flowers:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
:shades: :shades: Yall Are Winning :shades: :shades:
I am so proud of you each.
OMG, Shoegal I would have died, much less killed the thing.Keep going hun, you are doing great.
Sagel, Trac, Zinn,Bluebell you are doing so great. I have to smile each time I read your posts.
YALL ARE WINNING THE WAR!!!!!!!!
little mutt
09-11-07, 18:55
Well I don't know if I can give you any words of wisdom Trac but all I can say is that when I was working on my agoraphobia I would always find it easier to go out after dark and keep repeating the same challenge over and over again until it no longer bothered me but before I left the house I would always give myself permission to come home if the challenge became unbearable. But I would promise myself that if I didn't quite make it today then I would definately try again the next day. I found that giving myself this permission to leave and return home if necessary took the pressure off me and more often than not this meant that I could complete my task. I can now go out and about by myself fairly happily, the problem I am trying to overcome now is that I don't like other people going out in case I panic when I'm home alone. Just gotta find a way to get over that one now !!!! Keep smiling !! :)
Everyone....i reckon we should walk to Downing Street and protest...that we need:
1. Paper bags at each corner
2. Specific Checkouts at Supermarkets
3. Green Flashing lights on our cars to put on in heavy traffic and it makes everyone else 'give way'
I can just imagine us all walking with plaques.....and holding each others hands saying 'no..you go first...no you!!'
Anyway...such a tonic to read everyones stories.
Ive just been out in the car myself again...like little mutt said....im not looking for a destination...more than just going on a journey. I know i am improving slowly.
And finally. Shame on you for killing that spider shoe...didnt you realise it was talking to you and saying 'eh..human..want me to teach you how to overcome panic attacks? Well the first bit is...i stay on your shoulder for 10 minutes..then we both go for a walk together. Whatever you do...dont kill me...or my magic wont work!!'....and what did you go and do...long live the theraputic spider!!
Shoe, I know what you mean, when people say to me and what have you been doing today, what I think sounds like big news, they say 'oh right' about, I sometimes want to say 'well ok it isnt the most exciting life, but its the only one I got so just humour me for the time being and at least sound interested lol
Sagey, way to go, you did good, even though you didnt feel like going you still did it, I think that is the best way to deal with this, no matter how crap we feel, still attempt to do it, even if its a walk down to the front gate, its still going out of the front door and into the outside world :hugs:
Kazz, thanks for the nice words and all the encouragement it really is appreciated :hugs:
Ok well my turn lol, I have felt awful all day, I didnt sleep too well last night and have felt tired and anxious, and was sooo tempted not to go this evening :blush: but then I thought how can I tell everyone, oh I wimped out today :wacko: . Well Ami went off for a driving lesson, Jade was in her bedroom getting ready for a nite out (and no one dare interupt that) and Erin was in her dressing gown glued to the PS3 and I had the sudden urge to do my walk, so I grabbed my trainers and the dog, not that he needs grabbing as soon as he sees me put trainers on he is like 'woo hoo time for a walk im loving this exposure therapy', and mobile phone in hand shouted im off for my walk. Erin then told me I wasn't allowed to go alone because its a dark alley I walk through and something might happen to me, i then had to explain to her that I am the mother and its me who is meant to tell her she has to be in before dark, not the other way around, 11 going on 30 is my Erin lol. I finally managed to escape after a short lecture and off I went........ on my own..........woo hoo lol. I felt really calm walking along the pavement and I turned into the alleyway at the top and even that didnt seem to phase me, then I calmly walked down the back alley to my back gate, my breathing was fine and I wasnt rushing at all, mind when im with one of the girls I normally let Kai off the lead at the alley, but I didnt this time, cause I wasnt having the bugger run off down the alley way and leaving me in the dark all on my own lol, I was even contemplating carrying on down to the bottom of the alley and coming back up the other side, but then decided not to run before I can walk, as they say.
Anyway back in doors no and im sat here breathing pefectly normal and feeling pretty pleased with myself, its like im all grown up and ive been allowed out on my own for the first time lol, so i guess today I took the next step in the battle to beat this bloody thing:yesyes:
Being able to post what I have done each day is really helping me and it is making me do the walk each evening, and soon we will be able to look back on what we have written in our first week and think, wow was it really that bad at the start :)
Hope everyone has a good day tomorrow
Love
Trac xxxx
Nice one Trac:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Way to Go Trac !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:yesyes: You're doing so well, Trac:yesyes:
Oh i take far to long to write my posts and everyone elses posts before me lol
Believe, thankyou mate for your continued support I am sure everyone else appreciates your words as much as I do.:hugs:
Little Mutt, thankyou for the advice, and I definately agree with what you have said, we shouldn't put expectations upon ourselves and should do what we feel comfortable with and work on that :hugs:
Zinn, well done on going for your drive, I know not so long ago you felt like being able to do that again was an eternity away, and now look at you :hugs:
I also think we need to ask for seats for anxious people in waiting areas, like they have for the elderly, and for us all to be able to carry little flashing signs that flash, 'anxious person coming through' when we need to make a quick exit, oh and I also think doctors should keep their first appointments of the day for us anxiety sufferers so we dont get there for our appointments to find they are running 30 minutes behind and we have to sit there like jibbering wrecks until its our turn and then forget everything we wanted to ask by the time we get in to see them ......... just a few ideas lol
Love
Trac xxx
See I told ya I post too slow lol
Thankyou so much Kazz, Believe and Rain :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
Trac xxx
little mutt
09-11-07, 19:30
I am so enjoying reading your achievements Trac. It's such a great feeling isn't it when you get back home after doing something that you previously were unable to do and if you keep going like you are at the moment then you will beat this agoraphobia. Every achievement will inspire you to keep going on to the next stage of recovery. I used to walk in the house with a great big grin on my face and after a while I found that I couldn't wait until the next night so that I could try my challenge again and try to get just that little bit further. But baby steps are definately the best way forward. All the best x
bottleblond
09-11-07, 19:49
Hi Trac,
This morning my mum picked me up just after i dropped Ben off at school, felt a bit wobbly for a few days now, i think due to stress as my house looks like a building site at the moment.
anyway.......
Got into Morrison and started to have a look around, all was ok until i got to the far end of the shop and then i felt it coming on, my breathing started to get very quick, i started to shake and i just has this huge urge to run like the wind, Anyway i have no idea how i managed it but i got it out it very quickly and finished the rest of my shopping. Next we went to mums for coffee and then on to Farmfoods to finish off my shopping.
All in all it went ok!!
xxxxx
Well done bottleblond. :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Way To Go Lisa, You are doing great. Keep up the good work hun.
Yes, the buidling site is on your nerves. You can do it Lisa.
Well done Trac you made a great start and I think this post is encouraging us all to take those hard steps towards improving our lives, thanks.
Tonight, thinking of the rest of you, I ventured out into the dark with my dog for a 2o minute walk alone. Got half way and thought I couldnt go any further but decided to go on, my legs didnt seem to want to go and my heart started racing. Took a short cut up a steep slope and slipped down which sent me into a panic, then I started to laugh and see the funny side of it all and carried on walking, think the dog thought I was mad but who cares I did it and am still here to tell the tale. Reading everyone elses stories and successes is giving me more determination to push that little bit further so thanks Trac for starting this thread. I shall be out there again tomorrow trying again and I do feel alot better about myself for trying.
Carol
xxxxx
Southern_Belle
09-11-07, 19:56
I do not have agoraphobia but just want to say a huge well done to all of your achievements so far. I would imagine this would be a difficult thing to overcome so all of you are very brave to conquer your fears. I do know that I feel the safest at home and I believe all of us do. Keep taking steps day by day and I look forward to reading all your successes.
By the way Shoegal, I would wear ear plugs for the noisy neighbors.
Love,
Laura
Laura,
Thanks for your support.
By the way, I wear earplugs all the time and they don't keep the noise out at all. I can hear their music over my own stereo and even over my ipod headphones! :ohmy: They are totally selfish and I'm at my wits end with it.
Keep up the good work everyone. :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
honeybee3939
09-11-07, 20:39
Ohh Its so refreshing to read such a positive thread !!
Everyone is doing so well !!:yesyes: :yesyes: all these achievements i cant keep up...lol..you all sound much more positive, keep up the good work.
Trace this thread was a excellent idea !!
Well Done all !!
GOOD LUCK TOMMO TOO:yesyes:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Can't believe all the stories on here, its great to read how well everyone is doing! Well, I did manage to get out again today, same route. I just kept thinking of what everyone else was doing & this really helped me carry on!
Also, must admit, it was abit of a wake up call for me today really, just seeing how happy my hubby was when he went to work this morning, I really hadn't thought what a huge amount of pressure it must be for him too. So that gave me a boost to fight this for him too!!
Trac - really don't know where this has all come from, there was just something about what you had written helped me huge amounts, it made me angry with my panic & anxiety, it was like a turning point for me, but I guess you have to feel ready at the same time, if that makes any sense :shrug: - but guess I'm trying to say a HUGE thank you for starting this, cause I read up on what everyone else is achieving & that gives me the courage to step out that door - thanks everyone!!
Can't wait for tomorrow (god, hark at me, can't remember the last time I actually looked forward to tomorrow!!!!!!!!) when my family is all here & I shall just grab my coat and go - think their jaws will drop to the floor! I'm absolutely shaking as I'm writing this, I feel like I'm ready for anything! Need to go & listen to my relaxation CDs and treat myself to a big slice of chocolate cake!
Can't wait to see what everyone's done next :yesyes:
Little Mutt, I know what you mean about walking in the house with a huge grin on your face, it really is the simple things that can make us smile the most isnt it :D
Lisa, way to go girl lol, you did brilliant riding out the panic and not giving into it, I think when we are under extra stress it does tend to make us feel even more wobbly, and by coping when feeling like that is an even bigger achievement, well done mate :hugs: :hugs:
Carol, wow how well did you do, and be able to laugh when you could feel the panic rising was a brilliant achievement, its kinda like laughing in its face and telling it to sod off :yesyes: I am so pleased this thread is giving you the encouragement to push forward, and even though we are not with one another in person we are all with one another in spirit and thats such a great thing to have :hugs:
Laura, thanks for the kind words of encouragement, its those words that push us all on :hugs:
Andrea, thankyou for your continued support, your right we do all sound more positive than we did when we first posted, if we are like this is after 5 days what are we going to be like this time next month eh lol :yesyes:
Lots of love
Trac xxxx
Becky,
thankyou so much for what you said, your turn to make me well up lol, I am so proud of what you are achieving and in such a short space of time.
I really cant wait to read about your families reactions tomorrow, this is more exciting than every christmas and birthday all wrapped up in one lol.
You deserve more than chocolate cake for the courage you have shown this week, you deserve to beat this once and for all :yesyes:
If anyone one wants to exchange mobile numbers to get support via text if they have a challenge to face I am quite happy to pass mine on :)
BECKY YOU GO GIRL lol
Love
Trac xxxx
nomorepanic
09-11-07, 22:06
Ok phew :wacko: I read it all
I have been getting daily updates from Trac on this thread but not had time to post until now!
I think it is a fantastic support thread and shows how much we can all do to help each other each day and we are complete strangers!
Trac and all of you - well done for all your progress so far and I wish each and every one of you the best for the future and coming days and weeks.
http://th164.photobucket.com/albums/u11/Fantome_69/th_Welldone.gif (http://photobucket.com/mediadetail/?media=http%3A%2F%2Fi164.photobucket.com%2Falbums% 2Fu11%2FFantome_69%2FWelldone.gif&searchTerm=well done&pageOffset=2)
Fab news and the best of luck in conquering this. :yesyes: :yesyes:
If you get a small set back then don't worry ok - it is not that you have failed or gone backwards - we all have these blips and you CAN move on from it.
Good luck to the future:flowers:
you lot are a bl**dy inspiration!
I can't wait to find out how you're doing each day, and you've inspired me to tackle one of my demons again, so THANKS to each and everyone of you.
Red
Hello Trac., glad you are making progress, me, I'm having a tough time with the black clouds the moment, hope they pass soon :shrug:
Dave xx
Hi all you lovelly people.
Today I am going to tackle one of my hardest tasks, Im off to the market and its one of those places I get lots of panic in. Wish me luck and Ill let you know later how it goes. Good luck to you all today in whatever you decide to tackle.
Carol
xxxx
Red, thats excellent that you have decided to tackle one of your demons, good luck let us know how you get on, :hugs:
Dave, sorry to hear your having a tough time honey, chin up and keep smiling and shove that dark cloud away :hugs:
Carol, good luck today with going to the market, remember you can do it, we are all behind you and with you in spirit while your there :yesyes: :hugs:
Love
Trac xxxx
Well done everyone on yesterdays achievements - I always smile at the waiting for dark to go out cos that has always been the very best time for me to tackle going out too, which is why winter is a thrill cos shoppin at about 4.30 is really good!!
Yesterdays achievement for me wasn't actually going out it was being brave enough to raise a difficult financial conversation with someone that had been long overdue - I had been putting it off and putting it off cos the possible repercussions made me panic big time.
Anyway although I was shaking in my tummy and my voice was rather wobbly I kept breathing calmly and slowly and went for it. So I feel proud of myself for tackling something I was very scared about doing.:yesyes:
Love Piglet :flowers:
What a night!! I was watching the clock all night!! Kept getting panic attacks, stomach ache, dizzy, boy was I nervous!! I knew what I SO wanted to do today & guess what, I DID IT!!!! It was great! My poor husband, he didn't know what was going on!! I picked up my coat and opened the door, took a huge deep breath and out I went!! Hubby came running to the door and I said calmly, its okay, I want to show you want I can do!!
Well, his face was a picture!! Absolutely stunned, open mouthed, he watched me from the drive walk a minute up the road, I turned round and waved back to him and walked back!! I was shaking like a leaf and absolutely balling my eyes out by this time, but I am soooo happy!!
He couldn't believe it, grinning from ear to ear he went off shopping this morning for our groceries and I'm going to cook us a lovely meal this evening! I am just so happy, I can't tell you how I feel. Absolutely shattered, exhausted and all the usual, but happy!! What a lovely feeling after such a long, sad few years!! I'm just so nervous that my panic & anxiety will try to beat me, but I am really trying to fight it this time!
I hope everyone else is doing well & its great to read all these stories
Keep it up :D
WOW WELL DONE:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
What fabby news bet hubby was chuffed to bits:D
Well done Piglet as well:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Piglet, well done mate, doesn't it feel good when you really do feel like you have managed to tackle a problem, its like a huge weight being lifted off your shoulders, and then we wonder why we didnt do it before lol :hugs:
Becky, awww now that really did make me cry reading what you achieved this morning, you really have made my day, today will be a day you will remember for such a long time to come :D Now if ever you feel the doubts of the anxiety and panic creeping into your head, block them out with the picture of your husbands face as he watched you walk up the street this morning, each day when you go for your walk now, imagine your hubby watching you from the drive way. You are an inspiration Becky and im sooooo happy for you. Have a lovely relaxed evening this evening, because you really do deserve it :hugs: :hugs:
Love
Trac xxxx
Quiet-Lift
10-11-07, 17:18
Well done Becky...you've made one giant leap. I hope you can manage a little more next time.:yesyes:
Piglet...Tackling issues which have been left for a long time is a big problem of mine, so congratulations for going through with the financial conversation despite your anxieties.:yesyes:
Can anyone help me here?
I'm having real difficulty in motivating myself to go out again, even though I managed to enter a couple of shops a few days ago. Now, I feel as though I'm back to square one. Has anyone else had this kind of experience?
Am I being too impatient with myself?:shrug:
I have to go out because the alternative is complete isolation and I need to have some kind of contact with other people even if it's only superficial.
I hope this doesn't discourage anyone else, but if it sounds familiar, I'd like to hear how you managed to cope.
Best wishes
Aww Becky that was marvellous hun. :yesyes:
Thanks Trac, Kaz and Allen for the encouragement.
Allen I find if I start to put undue pressure on myself to go out then it becomes abit counterproductive and I need to want to do what I am trying to do - rather than practice for practice sake, cos that just feels too contrived.
If you can find a reason for doing what your doing besides just the agoraphobia then it lends a purpose to the experience.
For instance I hadn't been out since Weds went I went to that friends for lunch cos I had no real desire to or reason to but today my youngest needed to go to the local town to get something so I went with her, that being today's efforts to get better.
It works for me to have that real reason rather than just trying to prove I can do it eg: for Becky it was the thrill of seeing how happy it made her hubby and for Trac it means the dog also gets fresh air and some exercise so the outings all have more than the one purpose.
I think you are doing just smashing and we all know that we do get dips and lows in our efforts which we need to try and take onboard too!!
Love Piglet :flowers:
Allan, I was doing really well at the beginning of the summer, and I let it slip and ended up completely housebound again, which is why im determined not to let it happen this time, the only way to do it is to push yourself, no matter how much you dont want to do it you have to make yourself, we all have the motivation inside of us, sometimes its just a bit hard to find, I am just reminding myself how I hate being stuck indoors and how miserable it makes me and that is helping me to do my walk each day.
Ive not long come back from my walk, as I got to the top of the road, I put my hand in my pocket and realised Ohhhh sh*t I had forgotten to take my mobile phone with me :wacko: one of my big security 'blankets' ( Piglet you will be pleased to know I did have me sunglasses on me head wearing them as a kind of alice band lol) but then I told myself I had taken the phone with me every nite this week and not used it once, so what did it matter that I hadn't brought it with me. I even braved it and let Kai off his lead at the top of the alley and watched as he sped off like the wind leaving me totally on my own for a few minutes until he remembered himself and came hurtling back again, I think he suddenly though, bugger if she can do the walk without me, I might not get to come everytime then lol. I felt fine again and even though I was shattered from being busy indoors all day, my breathing stayed fine and I enjoyed the walk. Monday I am definately going to go just a bit further, to give me a challenge.
Hope everyone else had a good day
Love
Trac xxxxx
I did it, I went to the market and managed to stay for 2 hours even managed to pay for my own things, felt really dizzy and panic kept mounting but I decided not to run back to the car this time and although it was hard at times it felt soooo good, I felt so proud of myself. I didnt go alone the family were with me and I have been following Claire Weeks books lately and it really is working for me now, cant say that the panic is any easier but I guess the thing is I dont let it matter quite as much as I used to.
So pleased to hear how well you did Becky and everyone else.
Carol
xxxx
Carol, well done thats brilliant, that was a really big challenge and you faced it and dealt with it, :yesyes: :yesyes:
Look at us all go lol
Love
Trac xx
little mutt
10-11-07, 18:26
Ahhh I'm feeling all smiley now after reading how well you are all doing :D Big hugs to you all xx:hugs:
honeybee3939
10-11-07, 18:53
Carol, Trace, Piglet and everyone else who as achieved today!
WELL DONE !!!!!
:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Will look forward to reading everyones success tommo:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Keep going peeps your doing fab, all fantastic achievements. proud of you all:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
WELL DONE CHAPS:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Trac I hate to mention this but will you, sunnies, mobile, dog and whatever be coming to the meet up in 3 weeks time???:shrug:
Go On :D
I dare you lol:shades:
Kaz x x x:hugs:
Well done Becky, Trac and all. I didn't do my litle walk today because I knew we had food to get. I went with hubby (he drove, boy do I miss driving) just went to a small somerfields, spent £80 and although I had 2 spasms of thinking I couldn't swallow, I stayed to check the stuff out, and even managed to speak to him on the way round (usually I can't open my mouth) WooHoo!
Well done everybody. I am soooooo proud of you each.
Today I spent about four hours in the stores. Came home put things away. Husband took me out for our anniversary next week seeings he won't be home. We went in ordered and sat and talked and laughed. This is the first for me in almost 2 years now, eating in a really resturant. Yes, I was alittle scared but just went with the flow. I had the best time, and we have decided that we are going to start doing things again.
So to all of you here, there is hope and light at the end of the tunnel. Remember you can do this, and you can beat this once and for all.
I hope everybody has a great day tomorrow.
:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
groovygranny
11-11-07, 00:49
You lot are truly amazing....I wish you were all coming to the next meet-up !!!
xxx
http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u256/PLNZ91/Hugs.jpg
:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:
:flowers:
This thread is very quiet today Mmmmmmmmmm
MUST BE COS EVERYONE IS OUT AND HAVING FUN!!!!!:shades:
I expect by tonight there will be lots more success to read about:yesyes: :yesyes:
Cant Wait........
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Sagey, wow a supermarket, way to go lol, I think we can let you off not going for your walk seeing as you tackled a supermarket lol, well done you did brilliant :hugs:
Believe, thats fantastic that you did all the stores today, and even better you ate in a restaurant, i bet you felt so good being able to go and enjoy yourself :) Happy Anniversary for next week too :hugs:
Kazz, matey, I am going to be brave and say yes I am coming to the meet up, Ami and her boyfriend are going to bring me, so I can leave if I need too :)
Hope everyone is having a good day
Love
Trac xxx
Thanks Kazzie, Trac, Allan, Piglet, sagey & everyone for all your support, you don't know how much this is really helping me!
Allan - don't give up, just writing out how you feel is an excellent help and Piglet is absolutely right about me, I'm really doing this for my hubby, if I'm completely honest, I wouldn't do it for myself because my core belief is that I'm not worth doing it for, but I challenge this thought everyday, its like I'm constantly battling with myself sometimes!!
Hubby and I went out together for a walk, can't remember the last time this happend, and I walked a few steps further than I had done on my own the past few days!! I had all those horrible feelings going on inside & the thought to just run back was overwhelming, but I didn't give in, I just got angry with it!!
Now I'm back, feel exhausted but so happy I've been out again today, I really didn't think I'd beable to go out today, I felt so tired and ached last night. That's worrying me at the moment, I keep thinking that if I don't go out, I'll be back where I was & I soooo don't want to go back there!
Hope you all are doing well and looking forward to reading more :yesyes:
Well done everyone:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Trac it is brill that you will be coming mate:yesyes:
Well Im off to the pub in a bit cos as you all know Im a closet alkie lol:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
First of all I want to say what a brilliant idea this thread is trac :yesyes:
I think you have all been doing SO well!! :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
I have been reading this thread daily and it has given me the boost to join in myself :D
Now Im not as brave as some of you and dont think I will be able to do much but later on tonight I am going to take my dog for a walk which I havent done for a while now as I dont like going out on my own!!
Now you can guarentee I will have my mobile in hand as I walk (just in case!!) and yes I am waiting til this evening as it will be dark and noone will see me if I start freaking out and panicking and run back to the house! lol!
Wish me luck peeps cos I think il need it :wacko:
I can feel the nerves and anxiety already :ohmy:
I shall let you know later how i get on!
Love Laura xxxxxx:flowers:
Good luck lozpop!!
I have a bag packed ready for me to grab when I go out, its got water, chocolate, mobile, paper bag, tablets & breathing exercises in it lol:) but hey, it helps me!!
Good luck Laura, it is going to be hard to start with but stay with it girl and you will get there. Take it slowly and do a little at a time I shall be there with you in thought when I go out for my walk later.
Love
Carol
xxxx
purplehaze
11-11-07, 15:09
I missed two days walking with my friend..so a bit of a set back but going back out tomorrow. well In fact I am going out at 4.30ish today. I seem to have the double problem of cant stay in by myself and cant go far from my comfort zones. Anyway I am going to be by myself from 4.30ish until just after 7pm but I will be in a coffee house which sometimes seems to help coz I am with people.. strange thing agoraphobia/panic/anxiety.
I do find once I get to a place thats close at hand like a coffee house its not to bad...
This thread has been great
Oh and thank you to fraggle who took time in chat-help to talk to me today
Good luck Laura.
Becky I wonder if hubby took you out in the car (have you got one) out a little way where no one knows you, would you feel like walking more in those circumstances??
You see it seems abit silly but I can do loads more in towns where I know noone so it doesn't seem to matter if I panic there (thereby reducing the pressure), cos who cares I won't see any of these people again will I. It makes a good starting point.
Love Piglet :flowers:
Becky, well done for going on your walk today, Try not to think of the 'what if's' just keeping thinking of what you have been doing everyday, and the look on your husbands face and i am sure it will give you the motivation to take those steps outside everyday, even if some days its only to the bottom of the drive, its still outside and its still a huge achievement :yesyes:
Laura, so pleased you have decided to join the thread, your as brave as everyone else on here, because your going to face your fear mate :yesyes: we all need to start off somewhere. wether its stepping out the front door, walking around the block in the dark, facing a supermarket or going for a meal, the thing is we are facing it and that is the way to our recovery. Good luck for your walk later, you can do it, and so what if you have to turn around and run home, I had to on monday, but I tried again Tuesday and did it, it really is a case of try try and try again until you succeed and to never give up the fight, because in the end we will win.
Love
Trac xxx
Hello
You all are doing sooooooooo great. I am so proud of each of you.
Laura, you can do it hun. You can beat this, don't think that you can't.
Purplehaze, you are doing great. I was once in your same shoes, it does get easier I promise.
Becky your doing it hun. Keep up the good work.
Trac, I think you are going to do great hun. You have come so far this week. An you have started us all on the road again.
It just amazes me each time I check this post.
Trac thank you for starting this post.
Also wanted to ask are any of you keeping your own daily diary. It much like this post, but keep track of your eating and drinking, your daily duties etc.
I found that the drinks and foods were causing lots of my anxiety.
Well done folks, it's great to hear how well you're all doing and, even more importantly, how you're dealing with any setbacks. When I get negative thoughts I try telling myself that they're inevitable because I'm still getting better. Therefore don't punish myself for thinking this way but work on replacing negative thoughts with positive ones until it becomes natural. It isn't instantaneous but I have found it helps over time.
I wish you all continued success and happiness.
Take care,
Mike :)
honeybee3939
11-11-07, 17:21
Well your all doing FAB!:yesyes: and dont forget little setbacks are also part of our recovery, i used to always stick little "post it" notes on my fridge when i had acheived something then i could always look back at them and smile:) because its quite easy to forget you achievements when you feel you are having a little blip.
Keep at it peeps im proud of you all !:hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Im giving myself a rest today, feeling a bit tired but will be back on form tommorow, good luck all keep going.
Carol
xxx
Carol im feeling like you today, shattered and it took me till half eight tonite to get my trainers on and leave the house, I did a quick march to the top of the road and back again, just to make sure I went out, and now I'm back crashed out on my sofa lol
Love
Trac xxx
Thanks for all the support peeps :yesyes:
I am afraid I didnt do aswel as I hoped I would:weep:
I took my dog for a walk, I was the most anxious I have been in a while but I was determined to do it.
My dog Poppy got very excited as I was getting ready and putting her lead on.
I walked out the door and felt like my breath was taken away.
I walked down the drive and onto the path and my heart was racing like the clappers, my legs turned to jelly and my hands were shaking uncontrolably.
I took some deep breaths and carried on.
Poor Poppy was pulling on the lead wanting to walk faster but my legs felt so wobbly I was scared I was going to fall.
I got halfway up the road and made the silly mistake of looking back. This set the panic off bigtime and I tried to keep on walking but I had the overwhelming urge to turn round and run back.
Instead of fighting this urge I am sorry to say I gave in and turned around and walked back home :weep:
I feel a failure.
I am going to try again tomorrow, maybe I will get abit further who knows.
Laura xxxxxx
Laura, you definately didn't fail, because you left the house, thats a huge achievement in itself, dont be too hard on yourself, remember small steps day by day and you will soon be going a long way.
Well done for still going out this evening even though you felt awful before you even left the house.
Good luck for tomorrow
Love
Trac xxx
Laura that was not a failure that was a great success, well done you made a huge step forward keep it going and it will get easier.
Carol
xxx
Well Done Everyone:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Ok Im gonna say this.......Im not bragging I just want you all to know it can and will be done by all of you!!!
Today I went to a pub, ordered lunch(which was inedible lol) went to the loo, decided to go out for a fag(alone) rejoined hubby, went home!!!!!
At one point in my recovery I was housebound for 18 months!!!!
Today as any day not a hint of panic!!!
I dont want well dones etc as this is my normal life now!!!
I simply want you all to know that it can and will be beaten
BY EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!!!!!
So keep up the good work Peeps!!!!!!
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
kazzie well done for getting back to normal, i too was housebound and got to the stage where i went to kefalonia for 2 weeks for my brothers wedding 2 years ago. now i can bearly walk to the end of the road and i'm really struggling with work due to a relapse brought on by immense stress and pressure. has anyone had a major setback and bounced back? any tips or reassurance please?
i'm getting quite depressed with it now which has never happened before, im not sleeping and im suffering with a tight chest and breathing probs so know i'm really stressed, i just dont know how to break the cycle? i'm really trying for my little girls sake.
ju x
Kaz -well done hun. :yesyes:
Laura always remember love that progress is rarely a straight road ahead - we take lots of little sideways detours, well I certainly do anyway. Dwell only on what was good and that was you even making the effort. :yesyes:
Trac - well done, don't you love the dark lol, sorta like the same effect as our sunglasses isn't it.
Piglet :flowers:
MONDAY MORNING SUCCESS!!!!
Took "Wee Man" to school, NO PANIC, NO ANXIETY, first time in something like 3 weeks where i haven't been gasping for air. I even walked the longer way home. I did have a pause midway questioning myself....but i thought f* it....i'm GOING to do it, so i did.
As i turned the corner i was greeted by a stunning little tabby cat that wanted affection, how could i resist??
GOOD LUCK EVERYONE...
x
I'm shattered this morning got bad headache and nose bleeds. I'm not going to do my walk today but I got up this morning made my hubby breakfast and walked to the end of the drive when he went off to work. He is so happy at the moment and that really is helping me do all this, but I've come back in and collapsed on the sofa!
All the 'what if's' are entering my head Trac - what if I don't do my walk today, I won't be able to do it tomorrow, aggghhh, just want that part of my brain to close down!!
Thanks for your ideas Piglet, I think that's some of the problem, my hubby takes me for a car ride, when i feel up to it, and I'm in panic mode before I go because of the what if I see someone I know and panic, I'm sure you know where this is going.........
Anyway, still trying to convince myself that I haven't let anyone down by deciding not to go for my walk today
Thanks for listening! :flowers:
Hi Becky..
I think headaches and nosebleeds can excuse you for not walking. You are not letting anyone down - you are poorly. I think if you feel ill, trying to go out just doesn't work.
How about making an agreement with yourself that IF you are feeling better later, then you will definitely give it a go?
Hope you feel better soon :)
x
Hi Bluebell,
Thanks for that - if someone else tells me its okay not to do it I feel better -do you know what I mean??
Made me smile to read your message that's really FANTASTIC what you've done this morning and I think that little Tabby cat was waiting for you.
Beckyx
Hi All
Feeling really bad today think I may have pushed myself a bit too,. far so just going to see what the day brings. I suppose you have to go backwards sometimes in order to go forwards.
Good luck everyone
Carol
xxx
You know we don't need to approach this with a bat out of hell mentality - we are allowed off days the same as anyone else would be. Sometimes we add awful pressure to the whole thing all by ourselves.
Every now and then if you don't go out then call them consolidation days and a platform to move off from, sort of like a pitstop to change your oil or something.
I may add that I have a lot of pitstops!!!
Love Piglet :flowers:
Becky, what you have to look at is, you managed to do the walk after 3 years of not doing it, so one day is nothing hun. I am feeling completely horrible today, tired, light headed and my breathing is all over the place, so wether I do my walk today is hanging in the balance right now too lol, dont give yourself a hard time if you don't manage it one day, as everyone says we are all entitled to a day off :hugs:
Bluebell, well done for today :yesyes: its such a good feeling to be able to do something without all those awful feelings isnt it :hugs:
Carol, fighting the agoraphobia is such a tiring thing and you have done so much this past week, give yourself a day or so to re charge those batteries before starting up again :hugs:
Kazz, it is good to be able to read how you are able to do the 'normal' things now without the panic and anxiety, because it does show us all that it can be done :hugs:
Julie, look at it this way, you have done it once so you can do it again, and you will do it again, I think this time of the year is quite depressing for a lot of people, with the dark nights and the cold weather setting in, remember small steps and you will over come it again :hugs:
Piglet, im not a happy person today, I was walking down the stairs earlier and bent down to pick something up and my sunglasses fell off my head and i watched in horror as they bounced down the stairs and fell to peices at the bottom :mad: aarrgghh thats the second pair in 2 weeks ive killed and now i dont have a pair, and of course they arent the easiest things to get hold of in the winter, im going to buy a stock of them when I find some, so this never happens again lol :lac:
Keep smiling everyone, we will beat this because we have the determination and the drive to do it
Love
Trac xxxx
Hi everyone,
Trace - get yourself a supply of glasses from ebay. You only need cheap fakes if you are going to keep breaking them, LOL!!!
Well last night I wrote a really long post about my achievements and then my computer crashed and I lost it all. :mad: So here I go again...
Saturday - My boyfriend gave me a lift to the chemist. He couldn't find a parking space and it was closing time... so (gulp) I had to run in by MYSELF! I asked if they had my prescription ready and they told me they can't get any more of my anti-depressant because there is a manufacturing problem! :ohmy: So I looked around the shop and there was no sign of my boyfriend, so I took a deep breath and got what he needed off the shelf and paid for it there and then BY MYSELF! OMG! I don't think I have even been in a shop by myself for about 4 months so I felt like a kid who had just been allowed to choose some sweeties and pay for them at the till like a grown up! :D Then we went to ASDA which was pretty crowded, and I was fine. I even realized that I'd forgotten to get a cucumber and I went and got one, AND queued and paid for it BY MYSELF!
Sunday - I went to ASDA again. I got separated from my boyfriend (it was my fault, I was looking at magazines for too long) and I got quite panicky. :blush: I managed to take deep breaths and control the panicky feelings, and when I found him again I felt fine. We had to join a massive queue, but I was fine because I was with my boyfriend.
Monday (today) - I had to phone my Doctor regarding the anti-depressants. I was told she would phone me back and I got in a right state waiting for her to call. I spoke to her and she is going to prescribe a substitute. I am now anxious in case I get new side effects, plus I will have to go back to the chemist by MYSELF to collect it. :wacko: I also discussed the possibility of a future pregnancy with my Doctor as it is something I have been thinking about for a while now, and she said I will have to come off ALL my meds. :weep: She also said I will have a few weeks where I feel worse than ever while I come off them. Great. Now I don't know what to do. I really don't think I can cope with my anxiety if I take no meds at all. I'm now feeling very tired, anxious and weepy.
Everyone on this thread is doing really well. It really helps knowing that I am not alone in this.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Well I've had a bath and I'm sitting here in a flimsy nightie because... I am plastered from head to toe in fake tan, LOL! :wacko: I thought seeing as going out is such a big deal I may as well look the part (and by going out I mean going to the postbox or walking the dog round the block - I'm not quite ready for the nightclubs yet)! Actually I'm feeling really low today so this is my attempt at cheering myself up. At least if I end up bright orange I will have the perfect excuse not to go out. :winks:
Please keep posting your diary updates. It really helps to see how everyone is doing.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Hi all it's been a funny old day today with the anxiety and PMT so just decided to see where the day took me and so far have managed a trip to Tesco, not alone of course, was a bit up and down in there but on my bad days I don't usually even attempt it. Also managed to walk out with dog on my own for 10 mins so was quite pleased.
Love to all of you, when I struggle I think of you lot all in the same boat as me and it makes me feel better knowing I am not going through this alone.
Carol
xxxx
Well done Lorac xxx :yesyes:
Very well done Lorac , Shoegal and all who've been thinking about getting out today. Yesterday I stayed home all day but today I went in the car with my husband to go and pay the newsagents. He waited round the corner and I went by myself, only took a couple of minutes. Later, at dusk I went for my 5 minute walk and kept thinking of everyone on here walking with me, and I walked further than before! I even went without me handbag containing emergency rations of water and Rescue Remedy.
Thanks Shoegal and Sagey, well done to you also
Would't it be nice if we could all go out together, bet we could go for miles.
Carol
xx
Yes. I would love to have some friends who suffer from panic attacks because I wouldn't feel like it mattered as much if I had one. :shrug:
It would be great to be able to go out with people who understand how I feel.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Where is everybody? :shrug:
I have walked the dog today which was quite an achievement as I felt dreadful and out of breath before I even set off.
I also phoned my insurance company which I was really dreading because I'm not good on the phone (not when they put me on hold for hours and interrogate me anyway)! I'm really glad that's out the way now.
I'm going to sit down and watch 'I'm a celebrity get me out of here' and eat some pizza later. I think I deserve it! :)
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Shoe, wow well done for all you achieved over the weekend, way to go :yesyes: by the way hows the tan are you looking orange now lol
Carol, you have done really well too keep up the good work :hugs:
Sagey, way to go, it goes to show just cause we have a day off it doesnt stop us doing it again the next day :hugs:
Well I thought id be brave and go for a drive today, so i grabbed the car keys got in the car, and the flippin thing was dead, lack of use i think lol, so i got out and walked to the top of the street and back home again, in the daylight, with no sunglasses:ohmy: feeling really tired again today though, definately tiring stuff this going out business isnt it lol
Good luck for tomorrow everyone
Love
Trac xxx
Just wanted to let you know that I managed my walk this evening!! I was talking to my hubby about having a calmer day today and he asked how I felt about us walking it together, which I wasn't expecting, and I said lets go!!
So I'm back, in the warm, shaking like a leaf, but I did it again and it was sooo much easier in the dark I wasn't so conscious about people seeing me
Well done Trace, it's hard to let go of those sunglasses, have been without mine for about a month now.
So glad you went for a walk with hubby this evening Becky that's how I began to venture out more, my hubby used to take me a little further each evening.
Carol
xxx
nomorepanic
12-11-07, 22:17
Trac
Here you go
http://www.buytaert.net/cache/images-tuscany-2006-sunglasses-500x500.jpg
Well done - so proud of you mate :yesyes: :hugs:
To everyone else on this thread that is making such fab progress....
http://www.cardisland.com/graphics/products/2287/thumbnail/AX5BG7419.jpg
Becky, well done you, your such a star, look at you go girl lol :hugs:
Nic, mate thats called Trac heaven that photo lol :yesyes:
Love
Trac xxx
Went to school with little one this morning and did the last part of the walk alone while Mum waited right down the road, when I got ther I felt so bad but tried to just let it all go, I struggled a bit but I guess I managed to hold it all together and not make a fool of myself, so that is progress. I wanted to just rush home to safety and cry but I then made myself go home the long way and prove to myself I could beat this anxiety. I managed just fine but now I am sitting here crying, think it's part relief that I have done it and partly coz the more I come out of the comfort zone the more I want to do and can't always accept this won't happen over night. The anxiety has changed a bit now, instead of feeling so dizzy I feel I can't breathe when out and my stomach goes funny and my body aches all over. Sorry to moan coz I have come so far I think maybe I have just scared myself by doing the things I haven't been able to do for some time and have to accept it is going to take some time to feel ok with all these things, I sure as heck aint going to stop trying now.
Good luck with all your efforts today and don't let setbacks put you off just rest and go on.
Love
Carol
xxx
Thanks Trac for the encouragement its really helping and good luck with your progress, if you hadn't started, I wouldn't have been doing what I'm doing!
Having a calmer day today, thought I'd browse the web and start some christmas shopping! Hopefully will do my walk again this evening with my hubby.
Great to read what you've done this morning Carol, thats fantastic! I'm the same as you, I come home and cry, I think its part relief and also, for me, its just so overwhelming too.
Good luck today everyone
Beckyx
Well done Becky!
I knew you could do it.
CONGRATS to everyone else who achieved something yesterday.
I walked to school okay today with my son - 2nd day NO anxiety :)
x
That's great Bluebell NO anxiety, I can't wait for that day :yesyes:
OMG, OMG, OMG!
I can't believe it! I woke up today feeling anxious before I even opened my eyes - not a great start to the day. I had butterflies and was breathless FOR NO REASON just being at home. I'm not quite sure how, but somehow I managed to find the strength to take the dog for a walk IN DAYLIGHT and not only that... I went into Tesco, chose an engagement card for my cousin, and then queued and paid for it BY MYSELF! :yesyes: I had butterflies, I was shaking and my heart was racing (and yes, I counted out the right money while I was in the queue so the transaction would be as quick as possible, LOL)! BUT I DID IT! I think this is the first time in 4 months that I have been out by myself with the intention of shopping by myself. I still can't believe I did it! :D
Now I can relax, read magazines and eat shortbread without feeling guilty. :winks:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Well done Shoegal, great success.
Carol
xx
Well Done Shoegal, I know you are so proud of yourself!
honeybee3939
13-11-07, 19:44
WELL DONE everyone for all your fab achievements, i hope you are all real proud of yourselves, because i am certainly proud of you all !.:yesyes:
Keep up the good work and good luck for tommo !:)
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Well done shoegal for that acheivment! I did about 7 mins. walk tonight. I don't think I'm very fit as I need to breathe through my mouth if i walk quickly.
Well done everyone on todays achievements :yesyes:
I had such a rubbish nights sleep ive pulled a muscle by my shoulder blade and the dull ache kept me awake most of the night, so I have felt light headed and tired all day, I battled a mountain of ironing, which maybe wasnt the best idea ive had lol.
I was not going to go out today, but decided just to walk up the alley and back to say I had left the house.
Hopefully a better nights sleep tonight will make me feel better tomorrow, Im just sending Ami and her boyfriend to the co-op to get me some deep heat in the hope it will get rid of this dull ache cause its driving me mad now :mad:
Love
Trac xxx
just a quick update on things. i'm not sure if ive mentioned it before but i'm on a sign language course at the moment ( i must love torturing myself!!!! ) i only agreed to go because my friend is going and she takes me and it was at a school locally. once i'd signed ( pardon the pun!) up for the course they changed the venue to a college, u know huge sprawling building on several floors OMG!!! Anyway i decided i'd have to go now as work have paid for it and couldnt really go in and tell my boss i'd wasted £200. So i've gone week after week and sat there with all the usual anxiety feelings, wanting to throw up,faint, run and also had no sleep the night before worrying about it. i didnt go last week cuz it all got too much and i convinced myself having one week off wouldnt really hurt things until this week when i didnt want to go even more and had to because i didnt dare have another week off. my mate was great, she parked on the staff carpark, even moving a cone to get into a space so i didnt have to walk so far and could take a different entrance instead of having to go up 2 flights of stairs. i feel such a fool at times having to resort to such measures but i still did it and didnt even panic when i got in there and we'd got a different tutor cuz steve is off ill. so feel ive made a little step forward even if i did need help and it was torture!!!
also today i walked accross the shop opposite to where i work on my own to buy ch0colate which i have never done in 3 years!!! i didnt even tell anyone or set up all the usual safety blankets. so keep up the good work everyone, this thread is and inspiration and believe me if i can do it anyone can!!!!
ju xx
I still had a headache yesterday, its calming down but decided not to push myself, so I waited till it was dark walked down the end of the drive and back again. I then wrote out everything I've done in the past week and I was amazed at all the things I was writing down!! So everytime now the 'what if's & failure' starts coming back in my head I read my list and it sure stops that in its tracks!
Hope your feeling better this morning Trac, I still having bad nights too at the moment, don't feel like I got much rest last night!
Great reading all the stories, really gives me motivation! Good luck everyone
Feeling much more positive today. Good to read all the success stories on this thread well done everyone.
Managed to walk from my house all the way down the high street yesterday with just my little boy as company, bless him he looks after me. And my greatest achievement of the week was that last night I went back to the bedroom to sleep. I have been sleeping on the sofa coz the bedroom was the place my anxiety started, wasn't easy but I so want to get back to normal living now and I am starting to see anxiety for what it really is and am firmly standing my ground. I know there's going to be alot of ups and downs but I'm taking them as they come.
Love to everyone
Carol
xxxxx
Glad to see people are giving it their best shot. I walked in daylight today, I seem to have got to a stage of being able to leave the house without too many butterflies and testing of my responses.
bottleblond
14-11-07, 17:15
Hi all,
I did a biggie today! Took Ben to school at 8.40. Mum picked me up at 9 and we went to morrisons (place i had the pa last week). Felt really on edge but i got through it without having another attack :) . After that, i knew i had to force myself to go further as i needed to buy Ben a new carpet and bed for his new bedroom so i bit the bullet and told my mum to take me to a place i know a couple of miles away :wacko: . My heart was in my mouth the whole way there but again, i got through it with no issues, bed and carpet being delivered on Monday :D .
on the way back home my mum asked if i would go to her house with her till she picked up something, so feeling a little better after doing so much i agreed, after that i felt brilliant so went on to another shop to pick up a few more bits and bobs before heading home!! :yesyes:
i'm really happy that i pushed myself to do this today.
hope you are all doing well too.
love Lisa xxxxxx :flowers:
It's amazing how well everyone is doing!
Sagey - it's good to hear you can leave the house without too much anxiety now.
Lorac - Well done for going into town and for going back into the bedroom. It's always hard going back to places that remind us of our attacks.
Becky - It's great to see you are doing so well. Writing down your achievements is a great idea because it's so easy to dwell on what we have failed to do instead of celebrating our achievements.
Trac - I hope you are feeling better and managed to get a good nights sleep. Have you got your new sunglasses yet?
Julie - I think you are doing really well. Keep at it.
Lisa - It sounds like you did loads today which will give you a great confidence boost. Well done.
Well today I took the dog for a walk in daylight, and not only that, I took him when it was school coming out time so there were lots of people about. :ohmy: I stopped and talked to a lady about her gorgeous french mastiff puppy, and then I went into Tesco and looked at magazines. I would have been brave enough to buy one but to be honest there were none I wanted. Then I went to the bakery and bought myself a doughnut. :blush:
Good luck to anyone else venturing out today.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
bottleblond
14-11-07, 17:26
well done shoegal :D xxx
lisa
xxx
Hope you enjoyed the doughnut, coz you really deserved a treat after that. Well don Shoegal you did well I think you are brave venturing out at shcool time, always a busy time I know coz I have to pick my boy up and really hate the crowds.
Well done.
Carol
xxxx
Well done for today everyone :yesyes: :yesyes:
I have felt rubbish all day, got 2 hours sleep last night because of the ache in my back, was up at 7 to get the girls up and couldnt go back to sleep once they all left as I had to wait for a parcel to be delivered, so i did the housework, to take my mind off of feeling anxious, my breathing has been awful today too :mad: so wasnt going to go for my walk today, was thinking all day, im going to give it a miss tonight. Ami got in from work and said come on i will come with you, so i decided to go. Just did the normal route but found it a bit harder tonight, lack of sleep and an aching back and the bloody awful breathing, but hey i just realised if i can do it and survive feeling like that then on a good day i can and will go a bit further now.
We will all get there with this :yesyes:
Love
Trac xxx
Trac,
You did really well going out today when you were feeling so awful.
I hate the breathing thing too - sometimes I feel out of breath even when I am sitting still and not doing anything active! Grrrrrr!
I hope you sleep better tonight. Lack of sleep seems to make everything worse.
Give yourself a big pat on the back for everything you have achieved. :shades:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Trac
Well done for going out on a bad day. Hope you feel better soon.
Carol
xxx
What wonderful progress everyone is making:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
Lovely to hear it:D
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
honeybee3939
14-11-07, 19:43
Hi all
I will second that Kazzie, they are all doing fab!:yesyes:
Trac well done too for going out when you felt so rough, you sure not gonna let that anxiety beat you are you hun.
WELL DONE ALL!:yesyes:
And good luck tommo
Andrea
xxxxx
This thread is WONDERFUL...
Now..i need to ask you a favour, i need LOTS of positive thoughts and support....
On Friday i DESPERATELY want to go to a town about 25 minutes from me. Russell Brand is book signing his autobiography and i know he's quirky, but i really like him (sad teenage crush at 32!!!!).
Thing is, at the moment i am having trouble going 5 minutes away, so how the flipping heck am i going to be able to do that. I know we can park right near the book shop, so that's no problem, its the journey - one i have done a million times before, so why am i so scared?
Ugh! I really want to do this. My mother is taking a day off work to take me so if i fail then she'll be so fed up.
...NO pressure...lol
x
Well done everyone, you're all doing brilliantly. :yesyes: What is so inspirational is that you're managing to achieve your goals when feeling anxious which is really brave.
Lisa - I had a massive smile on my face this morning when your text came through and I'm so proud of you.
Trac - A big well done for carrying on with things despite feeling rubbish these last couple of days. What's more is you don't moan about it and I think you're a very strong person. While you're struggling with sleep it's not surprising things are more difficult but once you get a good nights sleep I'm sure you'll feel loads better.
Bluebell - Good luck for the booksigning. Perhaps you could go with the mindset that I'm trying and if it gets too much I can turn around. That way it eases the pressure and gives you a way out. You could also try breaking the event down into steps and writing down strategies on how to cope with each section. The first step could be getting ready, the second step the journey etc.
Take care,
Mike :)
First of all WELL DONE everyone on their acheivements!!! :yesyes: :yesyes:
Bluebell- I understand the crush on Russell Brand :winks: He is really funny and I also wanted to go to the book signing. It is at bluewater this friday isnt it? And bluewater is right near me!!
So if I feel ok Friday I might pop up there! So if you do end up going I can always meet you there if you need a bit of support :)
Let me know what you think and if you want then I will pm you my mobile number so you can get in touch with me if you want to :hugs:
Just an idea hun.
Well just an update about my own successes(sp?)
Yesterday I was feeling anxious ALL day and it really got me down and in the evening I got a panic attack, I could feel it building up and I just suddenly felt really sick and tired of the whole panic attack and feelin anxious all day and I found I got angry :mad:
And I went and put some shoes on grabbed my coat and went outside in the garden, I could feel myself getting more and more panicky and I said to myself that I had enough and its not going to control me.
I walked to the end of the garden and went out the back and onto the street and walked slowly up the road, I told myself im NOT gonna give in and rush home, im gonna do this!! I will only go home when IM ready not when anxiety makes me feel i should be home now!
I couldnt believe what I was doing really but I stuck with it, even though I felt sick and dizzy and I was shaking the full works!!
I kept going and then I really felt like I hit a wall, and i felt so tired and shakey so instead of giving in and rushing home, I sat on a wall and told myself im staying here no matter what. And i did, I sat there for what felt like a lifetime and then got up and walked the LONG way home!! :yesyes:
And on the way back I didnt feel panicky at all!
I felt amazing and I was buzzing!!! feeling the best I have felt for ages!
I was so proud of myself and I know now I CAN beat this!!!
Like we all can!!!
This is a huge step for me and I am glad I did what I did!!
Keep up the good work everyone!!! :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Laura xxxxxxx:flowers:
Bluebell
Sending you lots of positive thoughts and I know you can do it girl. Where is Russell Brand signing his book I like him and may attempt it myself. People say my daughter looks like Russell Brand.
Carol
xxx
Lorac & Laura.
He's in Chelmsford, Waterstones, 12.30. Lorac, you can park at the back of Debenhams and then walk through between The Gap. No distance AT ALL :)
x
Lol at you all! Trust Russell Brand to be able to cure you of your agoraphobia! :winks: I wanted to see Gordon Ramsey when he did a book signing near me, but I knew the crowds would be awful so I thought it would be too much for me.
Laura - Well done! It was really brave of you to go out feeling so anxious, and staying put to ride out the panic attack was very brave.
Keep up the good work everyone! :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Have you seen his trousers? Its enough to the get most agoraphobic person (i.e ME!!!!) TRYING to see those....LOL!
The queue doesn't bother me because its not as if i am there with a trolley load of food needing to be checked out - only want a book signed, maybe a picture, a kiss...a phone number would be fab :)
Not asking for much hey!?
And whats even better is that its right next to H & M...so maybe pop into there for a little look around. I think its that time of the year to stock up on hoodies.
I actually went shopping today. I treated myself to jeans, top and a checked shirt. We parked close to the shops i wanted to go in, but still....i went in there and that was after a day at work too.
x
Hi everyone :)
Good luck Bluebell for Friday, so understand where you're coming from with Russell Brand, will be thinking of you and sending you lots of positive vibes :yesyes:
Must have slept wrong last night, my shoulders and neck are really aching this morning, thats making my anxiety abit bad and trying to keep my breathing calm too. Will see how I go with going out later!
Its great too adding new things to my list of what I'm doing everyday, I've got it pinned up in the kitchen for everyone else to see too!!
Good luck today everyone :D
yay honey:yesyes:
excellent work, see youre far stronger than you think honey:)
soooooooo proud of you for what you did:yesyes:
on the other hand...
trace? trace where are you?
update please:)
Aaarggghh I just did a huge long post and my connection went:mad: :lac: Ok now for the short version lol
Everyone is doing sooooo well, you should all be so proud of yourselves, shows what we can achieve with some encouragement and willpower, and we are all now making that journey towards the light at the end of our tunnel.
Laura, well done for facing the panic and riding it out, the more you do this the easier it will get, and then you wont be thinking twice about stepping out the front door :yesyes:
Becky, hope your feeling better hun, I think ist where we are so tense when we go out at the moment, it is giving us all aches and pains, the more we relax while we are out the less tired we will feel.:hugs:
Shoe, you wont be able to stay away from Tesco soon mate, you will be whizzing around there everyday with a trolley, thinking, how much cheaper it was when you weren't able to go in there lol:hugs:
Bluebell, good luck for tomorrow Hun, have a great time, im not a Russell Brand fan, but now if it was Jonny Depp there, sod the agoraphobia i'd be first in the queue lol
:yesyes:
I am soooo tired still, ive had a total of 6 hours sleep in 2 nights, but my back seems to have eased off now (touch wood and hope im not talking too soon lol) think its that tube of deep heat that I used lol. I only did a walk to the top of the back alley and back today (in fluffy slipper boots :blush: ) but I was brave and did it in the daylight, minus sunglasses:shades: , go me lol, fingers crossed for a decent nights sleep tonight, so I can stop walking about like a zombie and really get going again:)
A big thankyou to everyone who is still popping in and supporting us all on the thread, it means a lot to us all
Good luck for tomorrow everyone:yesyes:
Love
Trac xxx
P.s Joel what are you on about you dummy, I post on the thread everyday, wake up lol
Well done Trac, I hope you get a better nights rest tonight. I haven't been out yet 'cos my nose is blocked! How sad is that? Makes me laugh to read my own words. May try later. Cheers to everyone else.
Well done Loz for coping so well with really bad anxiety, it really is tough but you overcame the challenge. :yesyes:
That's great that you went to the shops AFTER work bluebell, you must have felt tired but really chuffed afterwards.
Sorry to hear you're feeling a bit under the weather Becky and hope you feel better soon. :hugs:
Trac you're such a star. Despite lack of sleep and a bad shoulder you're still making steps forward all the time. Going out when it's still light is an achievement in itself, but doing it when not feeling at your best is fantastic. :hugs:
Well done everyone we are all making good steps going forward.
Each day this week I have managed to make a trip around Tescos and each time it's getting a little easier. Also managed to sit with a double glazing salesman tonight for an hour sorting out new windows which would have been too much for me to do a few weeks back so I know I am getting more confidence back.
It's going to take time to recover but I know that I am now on the right track and the more I do the more I want to do.
My house is looking alot better now coz I seem to have more energy and interest in it and for the first time in a long while I am finding the me that I lost.
Keep up the hard work everyone it will be well worth the effort in the end.
Carol
xxxx
Well done evryone!!:yesyes:
You are doing it, you've done it, you can all beat the b***h that is Agoraphobia.
We will all suffer set backs and days were nothing is going according to plan..we'll get all confident then something pants will happen to bring you back down ..however that's just life it's not Agoraphobic targeted lol
Don't give up you lot you are all doing fantastic.
It takes alot of courage to take this monster on, you should all be very proud of yourselves.:hugs:
Thanks for the encouragement Maxine
Carol
xxx
honeybee3939
15-11-07, 21:03
Sounds like your all making excellent progress:yesyes: :yesyes:
Im realy enjoying reading this thread, your all working so hard at beating the Agorophobia and it sure is paying off:yesyes: I have to say you all seem to be alot more confident with yourselves too. WELL DONE !
GOOD LUCK TOMMO!
Andrea
xxxxxxx
Sagey, hope your feeling better too now hun :hugs:
Carol, you are really doing well, I am soooo impressed and its really heart warming to read all the positives, you go girl :hugs:
Maxine, thankyou for the encouragement, you have been where we are now and have come out the other end, your an inspiration mate :hugs:
Andrea and Mike, you two always encourage me everyday on MSN and i am so grateful to you for that, your such good friends, thankyou :hugs: :hugs:
Do you realise ladies and gents (hark at me being all posh lol) it wont be long before I will have to move this thread to the success forum, because its definately going to belong in there :yesyes:
Hope you all have a stress free day tomorrow
Love
Trac xxxx
Hello everyone i am new to no more panic and would love to join this thread!
The biggest way my agoraphobia affects me is travelling anywhere by car. I have got to a point where i am ok(ish) at walking down the street and going to the supermarket. However i need to work on walking down street and going to supermarket in daylight as i mostly do it when dark and i know the supermarket will be a lot quieter.
I cannot get into a car at the moment where someone else is driving, for the fear that if i need to get back suddenly then i will have no control over turning the car round. I have to be the driver.
At the moment i can get to a point 2 miles from my house in the car but that is when the panic really starts to hit - i always turn round then. A huge problem is that the majority of my friends live past that point. I have 2 little dogs so i use them to get me out of the house as much as possible for walks.
So my first small challenge i am setting myself is to try and take a walk along the street each day for a week or so in the Daylight. And to try and drive slightly further than the usual point i immediately turn round and face the panic a little.
Best of luck to everyone else in the agoraphobia thread i HATE this condition but look forward to getting to know you all.
Emma x
Emma,
Lovely to see you here :hugs: good luck with your walks each day, post and let us know how they go everyday and how you felt whilst out, remember just set yourself small goals and once you have achieved those goals and feel comfortable doing them, then move the goal posts a bit further away.
Its funny how we all feel so much safer doing things at night isnt it, maybe if they kept supermarkets pitch black and gave us torches as we went in, we would be able to shop without a problem lol
Love
Trac xxx
hiya guys great to read how you all getting on !
well im sat here worrying my pants off lol got to meet my therapst in a hour further down my street ! i know i got to push myself just thinking of going out my door alone makeing me feel ill lol
when i get to her i want to run home lol but i dont want to let anyone down lol arghhhhhhhh dont want to go :(
Nikki,
Good luck honey, you can do it, just focus on something straight ahead of you and walk, ignoring everything else around you :yesyes: you go girl
Love
Trac xxx
thanks trac hun !
5mins and i better get a move on dont feel too good at min but know i have to push myself outta the door lol
my depression dont help just want to sit in a corner and cry feel low trying so hard to keep my chin up lol
here goes ill post to let ya know how i get on lol !! xoxox
Nikki,
Hope it went well for you :hugs:
Love
Trac xxx
Everyone is doing so well!! You're doing really well Carol and I'm the same as you with the house, I've felt better in myself & I'm going round a room at a time and having a complete clear out and tidy up, and that feels great actually!
Good luck to Nikki, hope you make it, will be thinking of you and a warm welcome to Emma and hope everyone else is having a good day!
I've had a pretty good day today, I've walked down to the end of the drive a couple of times today, because where I've been clearing out I needed to take some extra sacks down for the rubbish truck & I did it!! Really pleased with myself.
When hubby is home going to try our little walk together later on. I did have a really bad panic attack this afternoon, but I was actually able to 'sit it out' without getting too much worse, just kept talking to myself and reassuring myself, it seemed crazy but it sure worked!! I'm amazed, cause normally when I get a bad one like that, where I feel like I'm gona faint I'd hide in the bed for days, but I fought it! REally pleased!
Sorry to waffle on there, I seem to have gone abit hyper. Good luck to you all, can't wait to hear how you're all getting on. Luv Beckyx
I went for a 5 minute walk again. I was feeling iffy as when I get to I think I can't swallow, the nerves kick in. I kept telling myself its only a feeling and the anxiety that's making me feel like this, but I didn't run home. I don't think my Flupentixol does any good what soever.
Went to school this morning and felt quite confident then one of the mums decided to wait for me so I had to walk with her, find this really difficult concentrating on talking and coping with anxiety but today I seemed to manage without too much effort. Took the dog this morning and unfortunately it bumped into a fence and knocked itself out, everyone flocked around to help and I thought oh my god now what do I do, but guess what , I coped quite well and the dog was fine after a few moments.
Got all the curtains down today and washed them and this evening went to visit my husbands uncle and had quite a good time. After this i went to the seafront and walked, we had fish and chips on the sea front then went into the arcades for and hour or so. These are the things I haven't been able to do for a long time and I really enjoyed doing them.
Feeling really tired now so am going off to bed but I feel really happy coz I can go to bed feeling good let's hope tomorrow will be as good.
Well done everyone it's taken me about 4 months of going through the panic and facing my fears to get this far and it is now starting to pay off.
Carol
xxxx
Yall are doing so well. I am so happy for each of you.
Where is everybody today???Keep up all the good work.
Hi everyone, I've done well today, woke up with bad panic and anxiety cause I had family coming round to see me this afternoon, but I coped really well!! Normally I would really be getting worked up because I panic about having a panic attack while someone is here (if that makes any sense)!! But I was okay! Was able to tell everyone how well I'd been doing and they really couldn't believe it! I actually enjoyed myself!! It was great!!
Hope everyone else is doing well today, Luv Beckyx
well done Becky so pleased you are coping better.
I woke up really tired this morning and more anxious than have been for a while, think its coz I've been doing a lot more lately. I managed to walk around the market and buy some veg then managed some clothes shopping so I didn't do so bad, taking a bit of time out today, think I've been pushing myself a bit too hard.
I guess we all have days when we can't manage all we want to do and we just need to accept that instead of giving ourselves a hard time over it.
Where is everyone today?
Carol
xxx
I'm still here. I didn't go out today, having a lazy day and my eldest is visiting for the w/e so back to the walk on Monday.
Hi all,
Yesterday I decided to have an internet free day, sometimes I find the internet takes over my life, I 'pop on' and the next thing I know the day has gone and I have achieved nothing :wacko:
I am still walking around the block each day, I find somedays I am really struggling now I'm not on my meds, all the old symptoms are trying to come back, but I am determined to stick it out and fight it without them, even my health anxiety is trying to creep back in, bloody anxiety lol.
Hope everyone is well today
Love
Trac xxxx
Great to hear You are all doing so well:shades:
Keep up the good work:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Having a totally horrid day today, anxiety on top form and feel lik c--p but this time I'm trying not to dwell on it coz you can't repair this thing overnight and tomorrow is another day. Think I have a bit of a bug aswell so that's not helping.
Keep up the good work everyone. Be back tomorrow.
Luv Carol
xxx
Carol,
Just wanted to send you a few :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: hope your feeling better soon, ive been feeling pretty crap too, I think because we are really fighting back now, the anxiety is really testing us, we just have to stand our ground and carry on, it will get easier hun.
Love
Trac xxx
I feel completely awful today too, but I know Trac is absolutely right cause I've done more in the last couple of weeks than I've done in the last 3 years so I suppose shouldn't be surprised feeling awful today.
It really helps me reading all these stories cause it reminds me that I'm not alone.
Hope everyone feels better soon. Luv Beckyx
Thanks Trac hope you feel better soon also.
Love
Carol
xxx
Becky,
Hope your feeling better soon too :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: well seeing as we are all feeling pretty yuk it does go to show it is purely our anxiety taking a stand.
Love
Trac xxx
Hope everyone is well today :)
I had one of those sleepless nights last night, so ended up downstairs all night :mad: fell asleep on the sofa once the girls went to school, and felt awful when I woke up, had a soak in the bath, but ive got the rubbish breathing and soooo tired, so will see how im feeling later as to wether I go for my walk later.
Love
Trac xxx
hello everyone. hope you dont mind me joining you all. i too am agoraphobic. i can go out fine with people i know but cant go out on my own. anyway, i'm trying CBT again at the mo and it's really helping but thought i'd join you lot and try and take a walk each day. i promised my fella i'd start today. keep meaning to but cant help putting it off. anyway, think i'm 'just gonna do it' in a minute. i'll let ya know how i get on x x
Honeybee, nice to see you here :) good luck with going on your walk, remember don't push yourself to far to begin with :hugs:
Love
Trac xxx
Hi everyone - i'm feeling bit better today, so I decided to venture out in the back garden and have alittle go at tidying up abit - normally I wouldn't do this unless my hubby is about - just incase my head starts spinning and I start feeling dizzy and then the panic sets in, well, you all know where thats going!
Anyway, I started just cutting few things back and then picking up some of those leaves and before I knew it, an hour had gone by!!!! Really, really pleased with myself, especially as my head went really dizzy when I was bending down but I just sat on the bench until it felt better and then decided to stop for the day.
Came in, had a lovely cupa and warm bath and now I feel really pleased with myself! Not going to try the walk today, don't want to over do it.
Hope everyone else is feeling better, & hi Honeybee - good luck with your walk.
Luv Beckyx
oh well done becky.
i too am feeling pleased with myself. went for my walk... yay! went for 10 mins, as soon as i got over the initial step over my front door i was fine. (the first step is always the hardest). returned home with a beaming smile and a runny nose! (oh the joys of winter). didnt manage to get a paper from the shop but i headed towards the beach instead. shame i cant go there evry day since its only 15 mins away. but yay! :yesyes:
Well done Becky and honeybee, you both did fab :yesyes: :yesyes: keep up the good work
Love
Trac xxx
hiya guys ! just updateing on how i got on ! well i got to her 5mins late lol i couldnt get out the door i felt sick just wanted to sit and cry lol !
she says im doing really well and we will keep on doing this and if i want further on we could repeat this everyday ! and maybe when im ready meet her further back down the street !!
Hi all, not been doing much coz the whole family, including me have gone down with some kind of virus. My little lad has been really bad with it and I've had a couple of sleepless nights with him. Keep up all the good work and I will be out there again soon.
Love Carol
xxxx
another update lol !
got to meet sharon again today at 3.15 :(
really dont feel up to it !! xox
Hi all..
I am having a right crappy time.
I have my 9 year old son upstairs (off school) coughing and sniffing, no voice. He's really poorly.
I've spent the morning at the doctors having an ECG done because my heart was all over the place.
Haven't been out of the house (until the doctors this morning) since Sunday afternoon.
Have you looked outside anyway? Its horrible here. Raining, cold...grey!
Hope everyone else is having a better time than me.
x
Hello all
I just wanted to post because i feel like i made an achievement yesterday. I managed to drive 5 miles from my house without a panic attack and going by myself! Ok so i had to do it in the dark so all the roads etc looked the same, but im still just so pleased that i did it!
I'm wondering something and maybe someone can help. My GP said to me the best way to overcome the panic associated with agoraphobia is basically to have a panic attack in the 'scary situation' eg the place away from your home and wait it out, stay there until eventually it passes so that way you learn that all the thoughts of 'omg i am going to die' or whatever is in your head are proved wrong. You then learn that the terrible things you think will happen actually wont and that other than feeling quite sh***y for a while you actually will be ok. He says your body can only reach a certain level of panic and then WILL calm down but that you have to experience it to believe it.
So what i'm wondering is - if i manage to go places gradually - maybe drove slightly further today than yesterday but did it without having a panic attack how will i know if thats a good thing that i have done because surely when i do go that little bit too far and have a panic attack and am miles away from home on my own it is going to make me think that i havent done that well and am not doing any better because the panic is still there and probably will come at me with a vengeance?
Does that make sense? Sorry for writing so long!
Emma :)
Just wanted to say well done to everyone on your achievements :hugs: . I love reading this thread to see what you have all been up too during the day
Im also agoraphobic but dont feel brave enough to step out of my comfort zone at the moment!!
Keep up the good work
Take care
Ive really enjoyed reading this thread and would like to thank Trac for starting it , because It really shows us we are all so alike.
Trac , we live so close to each other wouldnt it be nice one day when we are recovered to actually meet up and go down the pub ,lol.
Today i did the school run and nearly fainted (really), but carried on to my work (which ive been trying to hold onto) , I did some housework for a elderly lady who is relaly undertanding about my panic cos she used to get panic in her 40s. Then I walked to my local shops and managed to buy some food , THIS IS A BIG ONE FOR ME, and I did it without panicking.
Now I feel jittery , grrrrrrrrrrrrr.
hiya all.
havent been for my walk today. went with my fella to work instead (he drives around fitting electric meters all day). driving around the coast. seems like i'm getting what everyone else has got - starting to feel really poorly...
anyway, i'm about to do something really scary... i went for my CBT yesterday and got persuaded to book a driving lesson... its something i've been TERRIFIED to do for years - infact, i was on my fella's car insurance for a year but only managed to do a few hours driving - it scared the life outta me.
anyway, my new way of thinking is... ''just because i've paniced in the past doesnt mean i will in the future. i have the power to control my thoughts and i will control my panixc attacks. i wont try and predict the future - i won't start any thought beggining with ''what if...'' and i'll just see how it goes. if its terrible i will just ask to be driven home and try again next week. i can succeed and i will succeed...''
anyway thats gonna be my achievement for the next couple of days... if i dont bottle out that is... :wacko:
Well done everybody for your continued successes. :yesyes: I hope the horrible feelings we all get pass swiftly.
Emma - I've heard this way of thinking too and it is a good point. However I believe it's important to find a balance between this and pacing yourself with reasonable expectations. It's great you're making steps forward and I presume you feel some anxiety along the way so you are doing what your doctor suggests. Obviously it's not as simple as confronting your absolute worst fear, sitting out a gigantic panic attack and then feeling cured the next day. Instead I believe it's about going at a steady pace so that you can learn how to deal with anxiety which builds your confidence.
Take care,
Mike :)
Blimey you lot are so busy and doing soooo well it makes me dizzy:yesyes:
Its not easy to go out when the weather is pants either so well done for that too:yesyes:
Keep up the good work:shades:
Luv Kaz x x x:flowers:
Hi all,
Nikki, hope you managed to meet Sharon ok today hun :hugs:
Bluebell, hope your son is feeling better now, and that you are too :hugs:
Emma, well done for your achievement yesterday, you did brilliant :hugs: i agree totally with Mike it is all about learning to control the anxiety in different situations so it doesnt lead onto a panic attack.
Pickle, when you feel ready to step out of your comfort zone, join us and you will get plenty of support:hugs:
Mirry, well done on all your achievements today :yesyes: and definately when im more confident we will meet for a drink, seems silly not to seeing as we do live so close :hugs:
Honeybee, good luck with the driving lesson, booking one is a huge achievement in itself so be proud of yourself :hugs:
Mike and Kazz, thanks for your continued support :)
Today I have only done my short walk, ive had the insomnia really bad for the past 2 nights only managing an hours sleep, this morning i was ironing at 4am :wacko: ive sorted out my relaxation CD's and personal player today which I shall use tonight as I found using them before when I had sleeping problems before really did help. Trouble is when I get the sleepless nights, it sends my breathing all to pot and then of course that sends my anxiety on a high :mad: I do manage to snatch sleep on and off in the day but its not a proper solid sleep so I still feel shattered, ahh well its all here just to test us isnt it lol
Have a good day tomorrow everyone
Love
Trac xxxx
honeybee3939
20-11-07, 18:49
Hi All
Just wanted to say WELL Done to you all for all the progress you are making, and like Kazzie says especially going out when the weather is pants!
I can see you are all really pushing yourselves which i am pleased to hear, because in my recovery i found pushing myself when i felt so awful was the hardest task to do, but once i had pushed myself i was realy pleased i had achieved something at the end of the day.:) Just like i hope you all are too!:yesyes:
Nikki, i hear you mentioned Sharon, i know you dont live far from me and im sure it will be the same Sharon from Pals who has helped me over the the last few months, i got discharged a few weeks ago.She is lovely and so understanding and im sure she will help you too hun. Please send her my love and tell her i miss her she was more like a friend than a therapist lol. She will look after you Nikki:hugs: .
Good luck tommo Peeps
Andrea
xxxxx
Hi everyone,
I agree with Nibbles. I think flooding teaches us that the panic passes, but it doesn’t stop panic happening in the first place. I think building up confidence by taking things one little step at a time is the best way.
Everybody is doing really well. Well done! :yesyes:
Well, I haven’t posted for a few days because I was busy going out, lol! Here’s what I’ve been up to:
Friday – I went on an Avon round. This involved going into 6 houses and talking to people and posting 15 brochures through doors. Then I went to Tesco and bought a few things for dinner. My boyfriend was with me but I carried out the transaction myself. After dinner I walked the dog round the block by myself.
Saturday – My boyfriend was ill during the night and I got 2 hours sleep. We went to the chemist to pick up my prescription and we had to wait 15 minutes. Then I phoned the Doctor who phoned back to speak to my boyfriend. We had to go to the casualty department at the hospital and wait over an hour in a busy waiting room to be seen by the emergency Doctor. My boyfriend was given a prescription and we had to go to Asda to collect it. We had to wait another hour so I did some shopping. I joined a big queue and had a bit of a panic attack so I went to get my boyfriend. He helped me for a few minutes and then left me again. Somehow I managed to pack my shopping and carry out the transaction. Then I went to WH Smith by myself and joined a queue of about 20 people. I managed to control my panic enough to buy a newspaper and some chocolate. I can’t believe I was brave enough because it was really packed in there and I’m not good in queues! :blush:
Sunday – I went to Tesco and bough a newspaper and some popcorn. My boyfriend was with me but I carried out the transaction by myself. I also chatted to a neighbour for about 10 minutes in the street.
Monday – I took the dog for a walk round the block.
Well I really can’t believe I did so much. This really isn’t like me at all! I’ve not been out today but the weather is pants so I’m doing housework and cooking a roast dinner instead.
Keep up the good work everyone. I love reading everybody’s achievements!
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Thank you for that Trac. Just reading everyones successes makes me feel more relaxed and even a little braver :blush: . I'll see what I can do tomorrow and if its a success I'll let you know.
Take care everyone
Wow you all are totally amazing. You all have done so much, and come so far. I am so happy that you each are doing well.
Hope everybody is feeling well. I am a true believer that we all can beat this once and for all.
Take Care And Keep Walking, I am sure your dogs are loving yall.
Well, I waited for hubby to come home last night and we both went for our walk & I even managed a few steps further :D even in the rain!! I pushed that anxiety a little further and survived!
I think if I pushed myself too hard and had a huge panic attack, it would stop me from doing what I'm doing at the mo, my anxiety levels now when I do the walk have come down from a 10 to a 7!! I'm also getting bits done round the house too which is great!!
Having a housework day today and if I fell okay later, I'm going to do a nice home made sponge cake with lots of cream as a treat:D
Can't believe all the fantastic things everyone is doing, hope you're all feeling ok today :yesyes:
The whole family have some kind of virus that's going around so it has't been easy to do alot these past couple of days and I've had some real bad nights with my little boy who can't stop coughing, poor little thing.
This morning took my daughter to doctors with a bad eye, really packed in there and although I felt bad I stuck it out, then went on to the chemist for a 30 minute wait and managed to stay with that one too. Decided to walk around town and do some shopping and came back home. Feel like I need to go to bed now, think I will have a nap this afternoon.
Sorry to hear your son is ill with the cough Bluebell it's a nasty old germ and sure does make the kiddies ill, hope he feels better soon.
Carol
xxx
Shoe, you did brilliant mate, well done :yesyes: keep up the good work xx
Pickle, your more than welcome and we look forward to reading about your achievements :)
Becky, you are doing so well hun, isnt it a good feeling when you know your achieving something, keep up the good work :hugs:
Carol, wow you had a great day, even though you had a panic in the surgery you carried on and achieved such a lot, well done you :hugs:
Andy and believe thankyou both for your support its really appreciated as always :hugs:
Today I have felt awful, had a very wierd head all day, definately effects of being off the meds now, I didnt go for my walk as today was hard enough controlling the anxiety indoors let alone outside lol xx I shall attempt it again tomorrow though, I shall call today my day of rest lol
Hope everyone else is ok
Love
Trac xxxx
Pink Panic
21-11-07, 19:39
Hi Trac and everyone,
I'm relatively new to the site and still getting to know my way about.
I have been reading this thread daily and I think it's totally fab the way that you are all getting motivated and putting yourselves out there so well done :D
I have asked my therpists, psychiatrists, counsellors, Doc, many times over the years if I am agoraphobic and always been told no, it's because of my panic that I am scared to go outside. I would really like to join you all in trying to move forward. At the mo I can go most places with my partner and some places with my daughter but ideally I'd like to be able to go alone or at least with my 10 year old.
Does anyone have any ideas as to where I should start? When I do go out I like the safety of having the car not far away but as I don't drive I have to rely on partner or daughter so this is also a problem.
Any suggestions would be great as I know you all know exactly what this feels like.
Love to you all
Pink
x
Nikki, i hear you mentioned Sharon, i know you dont live far from me and im sure it will be the same Sharon from Pals who has helped me over the the last few months, i got discharged a few weeks ago.She is lovely and so understanding and im sure she will help you too hun. Please send her my love and tell her i miss her she was more like a friend than a therapist lol. She will look after you Nikki:hugs: .
just sent u a pm hun ! let me know ur full name and where abouts u r and ill ask see if she remembers you !
she is very understanding and very more like a friend ! did u just see her ? i saw a women called liz but just see sharon at the min !
i still freak out everytime i get out the door but she keeps telling me to keep trying and im doin really well ! got to see her now until 20th dec !
hi Pink, reading your post reminded me so much of myself. I used to be scared going out with others but have built my confidence up to being able to go out with members of the family. I too shall be happy when the day comes that I can take my 8 year old shopping or just for a walk to the park without taking someone with us, I even find going to the school gates hard on my own. Like you the panic is what makes things so difficult for me but I would class it as agoraphobia when you can't go out alone.
Since being part of the agoraphobia diary I have managed to do more and more coz it really does give you something to keep working at when you know others are in the same boat as you.
Good luck.
Love
Carol
xxx
Hi Pink,
Welcome to the thread, glad you decided to join us :hugs:
Start by doing short walks by yourself away from your comfort zone and then go from there, increasing the distance once you feel comfortable, then maybe going into a shop alone, remember dont push yourself too hard or try to rush things and you will soon be out and about all by yourself :yesyes:
Let us know how you get on each day
Love
Trac xxxx
honeybee3939
21-11-07, 21:06
Hi
Its great to read everyones achievements today.:yesyes: :yesyes:
Trace hope you feel better tommo and dont forget you have already made steps to recovery already, theres no rush where all allowed to have off days.:)
Pink reading your thread reminded me so much of how i used to be, i never went anywhere alone and also used my car as a safe place and would park as near as possible to the place i was going so i could get back quick if i felt unwell. I wouldnt even walk to the top of my street to the corner shop, i had to take my car there too then i could get home quickly.
Its taken me along time to get over the "safe place" syndrome as i call it, all the what ifs etc. One thing that did help with not relying on the car was to switch my thoughts instead to my mobile phone, i used to tell myself "if i dont feel well i have my phone with me to ring my husband etc so i know i am safe". I know using my phone was really another safety behaviour but it was better than using my car for an escape, and also gave me more confidence to be able to venture a little futhur afield knowing there was always going to be someone at the end of the phone if need be.:)
Nikki, Yes it sounds like the same Sharon, Liz is another therapist whom works with her. If you tell her my name Andrea im sure she will know who i am.
Sharon as been so helpful, i was vertually house bound when i first started seeing her, over the 12 month or so i was seeing her we started with small steps, firstly from home with her till eventually i felt confident meeting her at the top of the road and the next week i would meet her a little futhur away from home etc. 12 month later i got on a bus on my own and went to the next town to meet her. I never ever thought i would ever see the day i would be able to travel alone. if i can do it im sure you can too Nikki:hugs: , i had bad weeks too, we all have those but never give in and keep trying hun, the buzz i used to get when i had achieved a little something was the best feeling in the world.
Im rambling on now...lol so i wish you all good luck for tommo peeps!
Well done everyone:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
i see her on friday hun ill let her know !!
xoxox
Hi all,
I've not been out today. I think I may have a little of what my boyfriend had at the weekend. I think I'm doing ok though considering I've cut down my anti-depressant dose by half. I was expecting to be a nervous wreck by now!
Trac - I hope you feel better soon. I think you are doing so well that I don't think it matters if you have a few days off. I think the trick is to go out regularly so you can go out when you need to, but it doesn't mean that you HAVE TO go out no matter what you are feeling or what else you are doing.
Pink - It sounds to me like you have agoraphobia. I think if you are anxious about going out because you are afraid you will panic, that is agoraphobia. That is my understanding of it anyway.
Lorac - You did really well at the Doctors and chemist. It sounds a bit like the weekend I had at the hospital and chemist! It wasn't easy, BUT YOU DID IT!!!
Keep on fighting everyone. We are all doing so well. :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Just a quick post, we seem to have come down with this horrible bug too and feel awful today. Trying to chill out but being ill has really brought on the panic attacks BIG time!
Hope everyone else is feeling better soon. Luv Beckyx
Hope you feel better soon Becky, the bug sure is a horrid one my whole family has got it, including me and like you it brings on my panics. I can never just accept it as just being a bug I have to read more into it even though I know everyone is suffering the same as me.
Luv Carol
xxx
Trac , i worry about meeting up and starting to cry ,lol:blush: .
Its terrible thinking that way , but yes we will do it one day, of that i am certain :hugs: .
HUGS.
Hi all,
OMG! I don't know what has got into me!?! I just walked the dog round the block and then I popped into Tesco and bought a magazine! :ohmy: That is the 4th time I have gone into a shop by myself in the past 2 weeks (I hadn't left the house alone for 4 months before that)! I was a bit anxious but it didn't lead to a full panic attack, so I'm feeling pretty chuffed with myself. Silly isn't it, such a simple thing making me feel so happy! :D
Anyway, keep on adding your success stories everyone. I really enjoy reading how everyone is doing.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Well done Shoegal, no wonder you feel chuffed with yourself, especially after your time of not going out alone.
I took my little local walk tonight. I need to push myself to do it in daylight next time. Last night my husband drove me to Matalan and it's the first time Ive been anywhere as big as that for almost a year.
Best wishes to everyone else and would like to say how much I enjoy this thread.
honeybee3939
22-11-07, 19:58
Im enjoying this thread too Sagey:hugs:
its so lovely to read of peoples successes:yesyes:
WELL DONE !!
Andrea
xxxxxx
Pink Panic
22-11-07, 22:09
Hi again everyone,
Thanks for your replies and suggestions. It's just so good to be able to be in touch with others who are experiencing the same thing.
Trac - Thanks for the Welcome. I'm going to start tomorrow by doing a small walk on my own as you suggested and then gradually build it up, will let you know how it goes.
Shoegal - Really well done you. :D Reading your post makes me happy too as it gives me hope that I too can get out there!
HoneyBee3939 - I'm going to use your tip about using my mobile as a safety blanket, knowing that you have been just like me and overcame it also gives me faith that I too can succeed. Well Done for achieving so much as it's so hard. :D
Take Care, Love & Hugs to you all :hugs:
Pink
x
Well done everyone, i think this thread is a real inspiration to us all. reading how hard we all are trying is really supportive. Keep up all the hard work!
I had a real breakthrough today, was scary at times but i feel ive learnt something from it. i know everyone keeps saying just push yourself out of your comfort zone and nothing will happen to you but i have real problems with this.
i am agoraphobic and my biggest problem is being anywhere i feel trapped or cant get home from. this is really stupid because i cant stay in at home unless theres someone in anyway so i dont understand that one??
Anyway i work in a special school so as you can apreciate that in itself is very stressful but i just about cope because my partner works there too so i know if i feel unwell he is there for support. thursdays he is out of school all morning taking the kids to swimming. i used to go but cant cope with being stuck at the baths for the whole morning with no means of getting back. usually im okish because a friend also stays at work who has a car and would take me home if i needed to. well last night she rang to say she wasnt going in her car today, omg!!!! panic!!!! i had no sleep as you can imagine, all the usual what ifs, so this morning my anxiety levels were through the roof before i started. i thought about having a day off then i thought no im going to do this. at one point i thought i was going to die! ive not felt that bad in ages but eventually it did pass and came and went for the whole morning.tonight im absolutely shattered and i know that is from all the adrenaline but also feel like ive really achieved something today and im going to try keep that positive thinking going over the weekend to see if i can push myself. good luck everyone else and if i can manage it trust me anyone can!!
love Ju xx
hello all just a little update on me last time i wrote here i had managed to drive 5 miles from my house alone, today i managed exactly 7!! i'm so proud of myself!! i know it is good that i am managing to get a little further without having a full blown panic attack and am managing to beat the anxiety i am feeling while im doing it, but its just a shame that i live in the middle of nowhere and while im so happy im managing to take little steps to get further from the house i know i am also doing it on quiet roads that i can eaily turn round on to get home. Where i live you have to get a local ferry to get to the "mainland" for 20 mins, then go by motorway for about half an hour to get to the nearest city. I havent done that in 2 years. I dont really know how to deal with this part of my phobia which is the part that affects me most of all, i am terrified of even trying to get on the ferry cos once im on i cant just get off it again in the middle of the water. I am terrified of the motorway too. So while i feel i am doing better by managing to get out in the car locally (not so good with walking though) i still am not really dealing with the main part of my agoraphobia and i cant even try until i get my appointment through with the cpn - im on the "waiting list".....
Sorry i blabbed on for ages there!
Hope ur all doing well
Emma :)
Hi everyone,
Pink Panic - I'm pleased that what I'm doing is giving others hope. I have a long way to go yet, but trust me, I have been totally housebound by this awful affliction, so I feel like I've achieved a lot! Nomatter how bad things are, we have it within us to get better. We just have to do it in our own way, in our own time, with the support of others.
Emma - well done for driving a bit further today. The trick is to take little steps and not think about the bigger challenges. Once you are totally confident doing what you are doing, then you can set yourself a bigger challenge. For now, just be proud of what you have achieved so far rather than dwelling on what you haven't achieved yet.
Julie - Well done for going into school even though part of you was tempted to have a day off. You did really well so give yourself a big pat on the back. I have the same problem - I'm terrified of being trapped somewhere.
Keep on fighting everyone!!! :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Well done everyone :yesyes: :yesyes:
Becky, hope your feeling brighter tomorrow :hugs:
Mirry, that can be our aim to meet up for a coffee mate :hugs:
Shoe, you going to end up having shares in Tesco at this rate lol well done you :hugs:
Sagey, thats great news going to matalan, you go girl lol :hugs:
Pink, good luck for tomorrow hun, we will all be there with you :hugs:
Julie, excellent achievement mate, you proved that you can do it and survive keep up the good work :hugs:
Emma, you blab on as much and for as long as you like hun, thats what this thread is all about, well done with your driving, the more you do it the more confident you will get and then you may feel able to begin to tackle the busier roads :hugs:
And now me lol :wacko: i wimped today im afraid, didnt get to sleep till 3 this morning then had my youngest home with a stomach ache, and i just didnt seem to get around to going out the house. Tomorrow i have decided I am going to give going out in the car a go, I havent driven in about a month and I love driving, my car has been off the road and its now finally fixed, well fingers crossed it is as my daughters boyfriend did it lol, so im going to go for a drive down to the beach which is a 10 minute drive from me and try and get out the car and see how I feel, will let you know how it goes
Hope everyone has a good day tomorrow
Love
Trac xxxx
Good plan Trac, and you can even leave your slippers on and nobody will know!!! :shades:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
LOL shoe, ive done that plenty of times, one day the car is going to break down and im going to get some very wierd looks getting out wearing fluffy slippers with pom poms on in the middle of the road lol
Trac xxx
Flipping heck, last night i was pushing myself...
I was taken to hospital in an ambulance (I don't do travelling with strangers)
I was left there with no way home (I don't like being left stranded)
I was there for 8 hours
I had a panic attack while i was there
..and i needed oxygen!
Apparently i have something called Atrial fibrillation, its crap!
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