Anxiety, brain fog and derealization

[BrotatoChip]

Last Spring my anxiety was pretty much full-on triggered after not being able to find a job for the summer. This, accompanied by stressful schoolwork that I kept feeling like I was mentally incapable of doing made me more anxious than ever. The anxiety manifested in very typical physical symptoms such as dizziness, palpitations, feeling out of breath etc. The anxiety was also accompanied by derealization and general brain fog. Essentially, whenever I had a bad day with anxiety I was very jumpy and my brain felt like it wants to jump out of my skull. I felt like running or screaming or whatever to exit from the current moment.

Fast forward to this spring; during the fall and winter my anxiety was much better. I felt much safer leaving my house and generally not as worried about losing my mind. Also, as opposed to last year, I was able to secure a great job in the long term, my studies are going terrific and I'm steady with my girlfriend.

So, even despite all these seemingly improved things, the springtime has again made me anxious. This time around I really can't pinpoint any exact causes of anxiety, as it's more a general feeling throughout the day. However, this year I feel like my anxiety has manifested in more mental symptoms.

This year I've had several spells of derealization, feeling like my brain is not functioning right. Again, I feel like my brain wants to exit out of my skull and feel like I need to do something about it or I'll vanish. Existential thoughts combined with general uneasyness combine to make a very tiring day to day routine, and I feel much less productive.

I guess what I'm aiming at here is pleading for peer support from people who have dealt with similar feelings; what do you do when you feel like your brain wants to jump out of your skull? When you feel like you need to do something but don't know what? When you feel like you might lose your mind completely any day now?

Thanks in advance for any responses.

[Lencoboy]

Perhaps you're having flashbacks to this time last year, obviously with various season-related reminders right now.

Also this time last year, of course, nearly everyone's lives were being turned upside down with the Covid pandemic (which is still ongoing, albeit with vaccines now available), and that must have unsettled you a fair bit, as it has the vast majority of people the world over.

I'm sure you'll be OK again soon.

[LittleLionMan]

I can't really offer any advice apart from I'm feeling very similar, and as bad as it gets, it also lifts briefly sometimes, reminding me that all isn't lost, and I'm still in here somewhere. Best of luck with it.

[BrotatoChip]

Perhaps you're having flashbacks to this time last year, obviously with various season-related reminders right now.

Also this time last year, of course, nearly everyone's lives were being turned upside down with the Covid pandemic (which is still ongoing, albeit with vaccines now available), and that must have unsettled you a fair bit, as it has the vast majority of people the world over.

I'm sure you'll be OK again soon.

Hopefully this is the case. I have a bad track record for springs even before anxiety. Looking forward to the summer and what it may bring, hopefully better times in terms of mental health.


I can't really offer any advice apart from I'm feeling very similar, and as bad as it gets, it also lifts briefly sometimes, reminding me that all isn't lost, and I'm still in here somewhere. Best of luck with it.

Same here, while it is a looming feeling most of the time there are definitely better days and times. The "episodes" of brain fog are very vile because they tend to fuel the anxiety further because at least for me they elicit thoughts of "will I ever feel normal again?". Hope all the best for your as well!

[fishman65]

Last Spring my anxiety was pretty much full-on triggered after not being able to find a job for the summer. This, accompanied by stressful schoolwork that I kept feeling like I was mentally incapable of doing made me more anxious than ever. The anxiety manifested in very typical physical symptoms such as dizziness, palpitations, feeling out of breath etc. The anxiety was also accompanied by derealization and general brain fog. Essentially, whenever I had a bad day with anxiety I was very jumpy and my brain felt like it wants to jump out of my skull. I felt like running or screaming or whatever to exit from the current moment.

Fast forward to this spring; during the fall and winter my anxiety was much better. I felt much safer leaving my house and generally not as worried about losing my mind. Also, as opposed to last year, I was able to secure a great job in the long term, my studies are going terrific and I'm steady with my girlfriend.

So, even despite all these seemingly improved things, the springtime has again made me anxious. This time around I really can't pinpoint any exact causes of anxiety, as it's more a general feeling throughout the day. However, this year I feel like my anxiety has manifested in more mental symptoms.

This year I've had several spells of derealization, feeling like my brain is not functioning right. Again, I feel like my brain wants to exit out of my skull and feel like I need to do something about it or I'll vanish. Existential thoughts combined with general uneasyness combine to make a very tiring day to day routine, and I feel much less productive.

I guess what I'm aiming at here is pleading for peer support from people who have dealt with similar feelings; what do you do when you feel like your brain wants to jump out of your skull? When you feel like you need to do something but don't know what? When you feel like you might lose your mind completely any day now?

Thanks in advance for any responses.Hiya BrotatoChip. Is that a Finnish flag I can see flying there? I often think how wonderful it is that NMP reaches out to so many countries.

Anyway, I could easily have typed out your post. I have complete empathy with your situation as I'm going through a similar phase. Those familiar thought patterns surrounding losing our minds, feeling cut off from reality, living inside a glass bubble etc. I've had it on and off over the years, but usually as a fleeting and isolated episode. For some reason this year its taken on a life of its own. I find myself questioning whether my body will function correctly, examining every movement, a kind of total body analysis and even what I'm thinking and the way I'm thinking about it.

OK reading that back, I think I really have lost the plot. I've even started to panic about coming online because I've convinced myself this laptop makes me worse. Like this glowing crystal ball that hypnotises me. So here we have irony of ironies, seeking support for a problem through a medium that I think is exacerbating said problem. I'm 55 and had active anxiety for many years, I should know all of anxiety's tricks by now.

What I would say is try to engage in physical activity. Exercise is a good one, get yourself huffing and puffing, feel that air being sucked in and forced out of your lungs, feel your heart beating, feel the sweat. Do you have a garden? Grow flowers or your own veg, dig the soil, feel the breeze and the heat of the sun, hear the birdsong. Wishing you all the best buddy.

[AuntWithIssues87]

Going through this right now and cannot really offer much. The one thing that helps me somewhat...fresh air. Opening the window while I am working, going outside during lunch, a short walk. I’ve got Seasonal Affective Depression and the winters here are so long and so harsh and just a simple walk onto the deck on a sunny 60 degree day is enough to get me to at least do the minimal amount of work required.