why no groups for h/a sufferers

[Gizmo1946]

As this excellent site shows there are thousands of us out there,so why are there no groups that i know of in the UK.We all admit to being lonely with h/a,i myself do not know of anyone like me and i would love to talk face to face with someone like me.
I once tried putting posters up about anxiety and h/a,and did not get one reply.Whether people were too shy to reply,or did not want others to know, i do not know?However reading the harrowing stories on here,i feel sure that some would love to talk to others,after all a/a have groups.
People who do not have h/a simply do not understand what we go through day on day year on year.Do any people on here agree they would like to talk to others who fully understand what they are saying and not a lot of gobble de gook.
My best wishes to all on here.

[nomorepanic]

Do you mean a face to face group or an online one?

[Gizmo1946]

Hi Nicola,
what i mean is even before covid when face to face meetings were possible there were still no groups.I say this because i have read that meetings of H/A sufferers in America proved to be beneficial.At the moment here it seems only a group of six would be able to meet face to face.Being a hypochondriac to use the old term can be a lonely place i have tried cbt,hypnotherapy,accupunture and psychotherapy my psychotherapist was good to talk to but i never thought she fully understood about H/A.Your wonderful site is the closest thing for any of us to get our message over as to how we really feel.So that is why i put the question out there to get an impression on how others would feel about meeting other H/Aers.
Best wishes to all.

[ankietyjoe]

What benefit do you think you'll get talking about HA year after year? Surely it's much better to focus on recovery?

HA is just another form of anxiety, it's something you can get ahead of and recover from.

[Scass]

Honestly as an HA sufferer I couldn’t think of anything worse than meeting lots of others face to face.

But there are lots of mental health groups that meet up - especially for walking. Have a look if there’s one in your area, and if there isn’t you could create one maybe.


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[BlueIris]

Honestly as an HA sufferer I couldn’t think of anything worse than meeting lots of others face to face.
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Me too, Scass. I mean, I'd like to meet you and some of the other people here, but in general there's nothing so boring as people who talk about their imaginary illnesses.

[Scass]

Me too, Scass. I mean, I'd like to meet you and some of the other people here, but in general there's nothing so boring as people who talk about their imaginary illnesses.

Exactly. Plus half the group would be terrified they’d catch something off the other half.


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[BlueIris]

Sorry to derail, but once I'm back from work I'll DM you a story about a colleague on my team who suffers from competitive HA. It was genuinely one of the highlights of my week.

Note to OP: I try to deal with my anxiety by laughing at it, I'm not trying to deny the upset it causes all of us.

[Gizmo1946]

I am sorry to hear you would not like to meet up but i may add that groups do not need to be boring or tedious.
I am a stage 3 cancer hopefully survivor and up until covid i was in a cancer group.We were anything but bored yes we did discuss our different cancers but we did not dwell on things.We told jokes,made copious cups of tea and took biscuits.We played cards and the men talked football.Guests would come and give talks on diets and give mindfulness.All in all we became great friends and still phone each other from time to time.We had bus trips out,meals out,and a Christmas dinner together all of which my wife came along too.You have to use a little imagination for groups to work it is not all about what about this or that illness,they can be made a fun couple of hours,to actually take your mind off your problems and knowing the others in the group are just like you.By the way this group was formed by my local hospital and it certainly helped me along my cancer journey i hope we get together again in the future.

[Scass]

Sorry to derail, but once I'm back from work I'll DM you a story about a colleague on my team who suffers from competitive HA. It was genuinely one of the highlights of my week.

Note to OP: I try to deal with my anxiety by laughing at it, I'm not trying to deny the upset it causes all of us.

Ooh I look forward to it!


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[Scass]

I am sorry to hear you would not like to meet up but i may add that groups do not need to be boring or tedious.
I am a stage 3 cancer hopefully survivor and up until covid i was in a cancer group.We were anything but bored yes we did discuss our different cancers but we did not dwell on things.We told jokes,made copious cups of tea and took biscuits.We played cards and the men talked football.Guests would come and give talks on diets and give mindfulness.All in all we became great friends and still phone each other from time to time.We had bus trips out,meals out,and a Christmas dinner together all of which my wife came along too.You have to use a little imagination for groups to work it is not all about what about this or that illness,they can be made a fun couple of hours,to actually take your mind off your problems and knowing the others in the group are just like you.By the way this group was formed by my local hospital and it certainly helped me along my cancer journey i hope we get together again in the future.

That group sounds awesome. Such a shame that covid has meant that so many support outlets need to close. I hope it opens again.

I’m not sure how old you are or even where you live, but could you see if you have a men in sheds in your area? It’s a fabulous initiative from age UK.

I hope you don’t think I was making fun of you, I’m a bit like Blue Iris in that I try to see the lighter side of HA sometimes.


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[Gizmo1946]

I hope you do scass just because you join a group does not mean you have to go to every meeting.Of course you can drop in or out whenever you wish.Some did it made no difference if they came back at any time because they were struggling with cancer treatment we were there to help.No one was forced to attend all meetings that would not work in any group,same as H/A you may not always need help, but when you do it is good to know help is there if you want it,is it not?

[pav1984]

I think a face to face group when safe is a good idea. If nothing else you get a change of scenery.

[Mrschurchill]

I have met people from a group on Facebook and we will be lifelong friends! I live in Scotland and travelled to Cambridge in 2017 to meet up with 6/7 others from all over the UK for a boozy catch up! It was amazing. Also had someone from Australia and the US visit Edinburgh and have met up when they were here. It’s an incredible group of people who all help in their own way. It’s a recovery group rather than a full on HA group.... but they are the best people! Very rarely is it anxiety chat now, we’ve been part of the group about 6 years now I think!

[Carnation]

I think I get where you are coming from Gizmo.
Isn't it more like meeting up with like minded people who really do understand the off days and are more understanding than shall we say a normal person who may not be concerned about an unexplained symptom that for us is linked to anxiety?
I do try to laugh off my symptoms most of the time but I feel you are exempt from normal society friendship and that's why we are on here.
Some have been lucky to strike up friendships by private messaging regularly, but many on here do not have that.
So a place to go now and then I think would be a good idea on theory. The practice side of that Group could be overwhelming with potentially thousands of people that unfortunately only talk about their ailments and nothing else. So maybe it is better to form smaller groups and allow those to form naturally.
Some people do this by creating a thread and then members who feel they have a connection will chat to you. Some will form a stronger bond, especially if you have a lot in common.
Hope some of this helps.