How to stop worrying about past things that may have increased my risk of cancer?

[Double_Rainbow]

How to stop worrying about things that I did (or that happened to me) in the past that may have increased my risk of cancers? From past smoking (quit 13 years ago), to multiple sunburns in childhood, to radiation from CT scans, to potential exposures to asbestos as a kid.... Health anxiety is back full force. Can't sleep, barely can eat, can't focus on my work. I am a MESS. Surely I can't be the only one???

[kmm111]

I have been fixated on this too recently. When I was younger in college I used to binge drink every weekend. Now, and for the past 15 years or so, I have been drinking a glass or two of wine almost daily with dinner. No more binge drinking, but I know alcohol increases your risk of many types of cancer. I am convinced that if I don't have it now, I will eventually have cancer. And yet, I continue to have that glass or two of wine every day, in order to calm myself down and diminish my anxiety. It's a constant battle and I'm really worried. You're not alone!

[Double_Rainbow]

Hey, I did not say it, but I too worry about my current and past alcohol consumption. I do not drink every day, maybe 3 days a week (lately has been transitioning toward 4 days a week, which I do not like), but I have 2 or 3 drinks every time I do drink. Every day I wake up telling myself that I will stop (at least for a while), but lately alcohol has been the only thing that gives me a little reprieve from constant anxiety. I worry about the risk of cancer from it, but even more so about the risk of addiction. Every week I go at least 2 full consecutive days without alcohol to make sure that I do not develop physical dependence, but I do look forward to the day when I can have a drink. Ugh. Sorry I do not have a solution for you! Thanks for posting!

[NotDeadYet]

Double_Rainbow and kmm111,

I'm so sorry you both are worrying about these particular issues right now. The "what ifs" are the best food for our anxiety dragons.

I have one thought and then some advice on how to challenge this thinking.

The thought: For many the fear of one day having cancer or having cancer in the present is either dying or having your life put on hold by something life changing and having to deal with the stress of that. The most ironic and cruel thing about health anxiety is that we actually fulfill our greatest fears through our worry. Many of us spend hours googling, obsessing, checking, visiting doctors, posting on forums ;) etc. We actually aren't living our lives! Instead we are metaphorically dying by putting our lives on hold to stress about something that actually doesn't exist in the present. The ONLY think we can have true control over is the present moment.

The advice: Seeing as how we only have control over the present moment, we might has well live it to its fullest. When these thoughts enter your mind, the greatest thing to do is challenge them. Something like "These thoughts are not reality. I currently do not have cancer so there is no need to worry about cancer. I can't control the future so I'm not going to worry about the future." The go do something in the present that allows you to live your life. Challenging your thoughts take practice but your brain will physically change as you practice and this process will eventually become a habit.

Best wishes to you both!

[Double_Rainbow]

Hi NotDeadYet, thanks so much for your reply! You are absolutely right. This awful anxiety about developing cancer is stealing life from me in the present when I should be enjoying every moment of it. I am never going to get this wasted time back :-(

I need to instead remind myself over and over again that I can't change the past or control the future, and I need to stop worrying about it.

[Double_Rainbow]

I run my worries past my BF, a couple of friends, and my therapist, and they all think that these worries are irrational. I wish I could see them as such. Instead, I keep ruminating on how much damage was done to my body, and surely I am now doomed to get cancer. This is an awful feeling. :weep:

[April30R]

Hi Double_Rainbow,

I am currently having the same fears - So much, in fact, that I am struggling to get out of bed in the morning. I recently had a CT scan done of my neck and was not informed of the radiation risks. I have now come to learn about the risks, especially to the thyroid which is very radiosensitive. I am now worried that I am going to develop thyroid cancer down the road, and I cannot help but think that I have doomed myself (I also had a head CT when I was 12 years old). I am 30 years old, and I just picture not being there for my future children, and it is truly crippling.

I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. My family, too, says that my thoughts are irrational, but knowing what I know now, the doctor could have used a different modality such as MRI (which does not use radiation) to check my neck. I really didn't even need the scan which makes it all even worse.

I will say that I have reached out to health physicists and radiologists, and they state that the risk is teeny tiny (still not helpful for us with anxiety that see the word "risk").

Sending you a virtual hug because I know how awful of a feeling this is.

[NoraB]

I've abused my body in the past. Alcohol. Smoking. Eating disorders etc. If these things come back to bite me on the @rse then I'll deal with them. I won't blame the world for my choices.

All I can do is take care of myself now. I'm ok now. (aside FMS and a dicky spine) I don't smoke, drink, and I try to eat healthily. My body is older now and it needs some work from me, right? The body can withstand a lot of abuse, look at Keith Richards!

Life comes with risks, and from the moment we win the battle of the sperms. Everything we do requires risk. So it's better to operate on a daily basis because the past has gone and cannot be changed, and the future can only be influenced by looking after ourselves now, but even then - who knows? I could eat my salads, exercise, and get wiped out by a car on my way to a yoga session..:shrug:

Also, it's important to understand that things can (and do) go very wrong with the our bodies but we don't die and that's thanks to the era we're living in with medical care. The issue with HA is that we only consider terminal illness. We only see the risks and the dangers and we only see the worst (and most unlikely) scenarios.

How many times have our health fears come true, and exactly as we've imagined them?

For me, it's zero.