Heather1234
16-10-21, 03:02
I turned 40. I've had HA for a while. I smoked off & on. Usually as a coping mechanism even though I know how ridiculous that sounds.
Anyhow, went for my yearly physical bc im 40, and to finally face my fear of doctors.I've been in a spiral since I made the appointment. First I was worried abt my BP (that checked out fine as I logged them at home), then my dr did a chest xray & was scared of the results (that was fine) then I had blood work that showed some things weren't in "normal" range. I lost it. (I messaged Dr & she said they looked fine - just needed B12) now I'm worrying over a sore throat on one side that sometimes hurts when I swallow & sometimes my ear feels full. I know how I sound. I thought I'd feel relief after quitting & biting the bullet and going to the dr. I don't. I have a mammogram in abt 2 weeks that ill probably be freaking out about later too. And the craziest thing is I just want to smoke. 😭 I won't. But I just want this HA to end...
Anyhow, went for my yearly physical bc im 40, and to finally face my fear of doctors.I've been in a spiral since I made the appointment. First I was worried abt my BP (that checked out fine as I logged them at home), then my dr did a chest xray & was scared of the results (that was fine) then I had blood work that showed some things weren't in "normal" range. I lost it. (I messaged Dr & she said they looked fine - just needed B12) now I'm worrying over a sore throat on one side that sometimes hurts when I swallow & sometimes my ear feels full. I know how I sound. I thought I'd feel relief after quitting & biting the bullet and going to the dr. I don't. I have a mammogram in abt 2 weeks that ill probably be freaking out about later too. And the craziest thing is I just want to smoke. 😭 I won't. But I just want this HA to end...