PDA

View Full Version : Really fed up with my anxiety



BrokenGirl
20-10-21, 00:10
I know this is a long shot but I'm really hoping for some advice or guidance.


I've been on the forum for about 5 or 6 years now, mostly for HA. Many of you who have read some of my posts will know that I've had it quite bad at times, worried myself sick over what a lot of people would consider to be ridiculous issues. But to me they were real.
This worry was not always limited to HA. I've worried about non health related issues too, could be anything to do with any part of my life.


Things haven't been easy in my life for the past 10 or so years. Without going into too much detail, there have been so many times when life has just been absolute crap, felt like I couldn't take another blow. This obviously didn't help my HA and other non HA thoughts too.


I seem to be heading down that road again, where I am constantly worried about something. If it's not health related it will be something else. And the worry consumes me. It's like I can't stop the thoughts. My mind goes from 0 to 100 in a split second and I'm thinking the worst case scenario. The adrenaline starts pumping around my body and the whole vicious circle keeps going. It's constant worry, all the time. I get fixated on something and I can't let it go.
And the worst thing is I have no one to talk to. I can't talk to my husband any more because to be honest I know I'm doing his head in with my constant worries. I can't afford to pay for therapy / counselling. And there is no public mental health services here. What we have in this country is an absolute shambles and a disgrace. People are crying out for help but there's nothing there.


Has anyone ever found themselves in a similar situation? And because the worries are real to me I don't know if they are justified or not. I don't know if I'm over reacting or if there is a real cause for concern.
What do you do when a worry just eats you up all day? You can't stop thinking the worst and it puts so much fear into you. Just hoping someone can give even a little bit of advice, when meds and therapy are not an option.

ldickerson1973
20-10-21, 02:02
Hi Brokengirl
You sound just like me! I'm in a constant state of despair/panic. I'm being bullied at my job. I've been through this so many times I'm not even going to try leave because the next job will be bad too. I dont like to burden my husband because he is in a toxic workplace too and has HA.

I feel so alone and scared. I wake up in the middle of the night out of a dead sleep into a full panic attack. I'm at the point now where I don't enjoy anything anymore. I feel like there's no meaning to life anymore. I'm mainly existing to keep my husband from freaking out with his HA. I just want to give up. My job is a meaningless joke. Nothing brings me joy anymore. I'm so stressed out I shake all the time and can't even sit and read.

I'm trying to keep my husband from breaking down right now as he thinks he may have diabetes. We go to see his Dr on Monday.

But believe me I hear you. I've given up on all my dreams and any happiness. I basically live to pay bills and keep my husband calm.

If you want to talk I'm here. [emoji3531]

Sent from my moto g power using Tapatalk

gillebro
20-10-21, 06:52
Hello again, ldickerson!
Before I address the OP, I thought I'd mention that I'm diabetic (was diagnosed last year), and it's very treatable. People who have complications with it tend to be those who don't follow doctors' advice, or who have gone undiagnosed for decades. It can be very serious, of course, but I can assure you that if he is diabetic, it can absolutely, 100% be managed. He'll be ok.

For the OP, everybody is different of course, but I find that having somebody (anybody!) to talk to is absolutely crucial. I'm very lucky in that I have my wonderful girlfriend (who doesn't have HA but is a very anxious person in general) who will always listen. I also have my parents and work colleagues/friends. I am not shy about discussing what's bothering me, and, fortunately, my worries are warmly listened to. Find somebody in your life who can be that sounding wall.

ldickerson1973
20-10-21, 12:15
Thanks gillebro [emoji3531]

Sent from my moto g power using Tapatalk