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ccake79
20-10-21, 09:28
I'm really struggling at the moment. I'm on medication for migraine that also supposedly helps anxiety. It seems to be working with the migraines, which is good as I was having approx 15-20 per month. Anxiety is not being helped. Last couple of days I've got ridiculously anxious over my son's health again. He had groin pain, probably from swimming. I didn't have the spiralling thoughts I used to, but I still had a horrid physical response (heart racing, feeling cold, shaking). My contamination OCD is also not great. My hands are sore from washing. I've freaked out over finding pieces of what I think are plaster on the carpet. Picked them up and put them in the bin, but they were near the kids toys and my hands still don't feel clean!

I have a counsellor and have also been seeing a hypnotherapist. I think I should probably see my GP but this is almost impossible at the moment, especially in this part of the country where it's approx 3500 patients to each doctor! I'm not sure where to start. I need to deal with this anxiety as it's making me so tired and fed up. I also had my bag stolen last week from my locked car, had to sort all my bank cards and a new driving licence. Just feel like hiding away.

gillebro
20-10-21, 10:08
It sounds like you have a lot going on, and that certainly brings my anxiety rates up. I'm always more likely to notice pain in my neck or a mole I hadn't looked at too carefully before when I have a lot going on.
Seeing your GP might be a good idea. You could also self-refer with IAPT. Again, long waiting times, but it's something. It's a plan of action.
As for worrying about your son... it can be hard when the symptom is being experienced by a loved one, but it sounds like a strain, and his not being worried probably means you don't need to be either.

Catkins
20-10-21, 17:21
What other techniques do you use alongside the medication to help with your anxiety? Do you use any relaxation techniques? Guided meditation? There are things that you can do yourself that might help (there a lots of tips on this site).

Also it might be worth trying to get a phone consultation with your GP to discuss medication, I imagine they have probably given you something like propanolol that is often used for migraines and/or the physical symptoms of anxiety. They might be able to amend your dose or try something else to help with the anxiety.

ccake79
21-10-21, 07:25
Thank you both. I'm on propranolol. I've tried guided meditation but find it difficult to sit still. My counsellor suggested going for a walk or something similar instead.

I'm hopefully having some kind of contact with my GP today. I filled in their new online consult and it said I'd get an email/text/phone call by 6.30pm today. Fingers crossed as I can't go on like this. Woke in the middle of the night, heart racing, worrying about the miniscule piece of plaster I picked up yesterday. What the hell?? I'm aware of how silly it all is but a lot of my brain doesn't agree. So tired. Also wondering if it's sometimes my brain distracting me from other stuff - my brother-in-law was taken into hospital yesterday with heart issues and my sister is highly anxious herself, with almost constantly ill kids. I also have my mum stressing over everything. Things have been tough since my dad died and I don't think any of us have found a good way forward.

ccake79
21-10-21, 13:29
Quick phone call from GP. Referral for CBT and prescription for paroxetine. Hopefully this will all be of more help.

Catkins
21-10-21, 17:29
I'm on paroxetine and it really helps me, it's a bit of a bumpy start so you might want to check the medication section for a bit of information.

ccake79
23-10-21, 08:59
Thanks Catkins. Good to know it can help and I'll take a look at the info on it.

ccake79
08-11-21, 11:59
Really finding things difficult at the moment. Waiting for callback from CBT service.

We have a decorator in and he's painting everywhere (artex ceilings), spraying stuff. Things are kind of covered but it's totally stressing me out. I almost cancelled him coming but decided to fight the anxiety head on. Not really feeling that it was the right thing right now as I'm very stressed. Concerned about effects of whatever he's using on my family's health. I know it's not rational but part of my brain is trying to convince me otherwise.

ccake79
10-11-21, 16:12
Had an awful few days panicking about the dust and paint and the fact our ceilings are artex. I've actually managed to clean up after the decorator, which is a start, but motivated by my fear there's contaminants that could hurt my kids, which I guess is actually my health anxiety and contamination OCD. My hands are broken and red from washing. I feel totally stressed out. My daughter is also finding the decorating stressful as the house is messy (although her room is always messy). Exhaustion is setting in and I now have to work. This week I'm also treating (radiotherapy) and I've found my job tough since my dad died of cancer. Just feel like gathering up my little family and running away to somewhere else.

ccake79
12-11-21, 18:31
I keep posting and no one replying. It's like having a journal... this week's been massively difficult for me but it's done. I've just cleaned the entire bathroom of little white bits of paint (I have to keep reminding myself it's paint not artex). My husband doesn't reassure, which is also helping. My anxiety peaked and now seems to be coming back down. It helped to focus on other people today and be in a different environment.

Deb350
12-11-21, 19:28
Sorry to hear you’re struggling.

I started on the anti depressant sertraline last summer and it has helped a bit with my anxiety.

Hopefully medication will help you. It’s difficult for others around you to understand what you’re going through if they haven’t experienced it themselves.

Did your GP say how long the waiting list for CBT is? It can be very useful.

ccake79
12-11-21, 20:16
Thanks for replying. Yes I'm not sure my husband knows how to deal with my anxiety. There have been times when I've actually started to make him anxious.

CBT is up to 14 weeks wait at the moment. I'm hoping it might be sooner.

Deb350
12-11-21, 20:49
14 weeks is quite a while to wait, fingers crossed it’s not that long. I know what you mean, my husband doesn’t understand why I’m so anxious, I wish I wasn’t!! He just seems to drift through life, funnily enough the things he worries about which isn’t very often seem like nothing to me. Yet I worry all the time!

ccake79
14-11-21, 07:45
Yes it's strange what worries some people. I find my husband also worries about things I don't worry about at all (mainly financial stuff). But will blithely go in and out of our garage emptying buckets of water from a leak in its asbestos cement roof! This completely freaks me out. I worry about what he's contaminating with shoes that have been in there and whether the water was contaminated and he got any on his hands. It's exhausting, isn't it?!

ccake79
21-11-21, 17:56
So today my husband said he felt dizzy and my son had a sudden pain in his neck, which made him cry. My daughter currently has a cold, but that doesn't bother me. The other two are. I'm keeping away from Google. It's not that easy but I'm trying my best not to go there for reassurance. Instead I'm sitting here quietly panicking. I'm trying to focus on the fact my husband says he feels better and my son hasn't complained of his neck for a couple of hours now and also looks OK.

I'm really hoping one day my mind won't jump to the worse case scenario. That my heart won't race and I won't feel sick. For now I'm focusing on the fact I haven't Googled any of this and that is a first for me.

Scass
22-11-21, 16:48
Keep focusing on the fact they feel better. Don’t ask them lots though or that’s just reassurance seeking and won’t help you on the long run.
Distract yourself with something else, even if it’s just washing up or cooking dinner. It’s going to be ok.


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