adventvista
21-11-07, 02:05
I just found this site and was wanting to post about my experiences.
For me I think I can pretty much sum up the events that led to me having panic attacks.
When I was 17 doing my A levels in college I came out as being gay. However after that I was bullied very badly by both the teachers and students. eventually I was beaten up and stabbed in the leg. They told me I had to leave as they didnt want me there anymore.
After this I withdrew into my bedroom I rarely left the house because the same people that had attacked me lived in the same area.
A year passed and my mother suddenly threw me out of the house and I had to go and live with my boyfriend at his mothers. I later found out she had kicked me out because she was marrying a man from turkey and didnt want him to know about me.
We moved into are own place where we lived together for a year it was horrible though. For starters he became very violent burning me with irons. also the upstairs neighbour had mental health problems and only afew weeks ago tried to kill me. I was able to stop him obvioulsly but it still rattled me very badly.
Because of this ive now moved into a house with my nan and my boyfriend. Im still with him simply because he says he will change.
Im now 20 almost 21 and feel like theres no escape from any of this. I cry every single day wishing I could go and get a job and live a life. My doctors are useless and my counciler was bad aswell she just said I had a bad case of shyness. I end up having panic attacks all the time mostly one big one every day that lasts for around 3 or 4 hours.
I think however Iam getting better the attacks still come but I think im dealing with them better then before. The only thing I think I need is more support. My nan isnt intrested in helping me and my boyfriend likes the control he has over me, so I feel like im trying to get better all by myself.
I think im really getting better though since I do alot of things I wouldnt have done before, like going into centre of newcastle and also just being more independant.
anyway sorry it was so long hope it wasnt too boring.
thanks.
For me I think I can pretty much sum up the events that led to me having panic attacks.
When I was 17 doing my A levels in college I came out as being gay. However after that I was bullied very badly by both the teachers and students. eventually I was beaten up and stabbed in the leg. They told me I had to leave as they didnt want me there anymore.
After this I withdrew into my bedroom I rarely left the house because the same people that had attacked me lived in the same area.
A year passed and my mother suddenly threw me out of the house and I had to go and live with my boyfriend at his mothers. I later found out she had kicked me out because she was marrying a man from turkey and didnt want him to know about me.
We moved into are own place where we lived together for a year it was horrible though. For starters he became very violent burning me with irons. also the upstairs neighbour had mental health problems and only afew weeks ago tried to kill me. I was able to stop him obvioulsly but it still rattled me very badly.
Because of this ive now moved into a house with my nan and my boyfriend. Im still with him simply because he says he will change.
Im now 20 almost 21 and feel like theres no escape from any of this. I cry every single day wishing I could go and get a job and live a life. My doctors are useless and my counciler was bad aswell she just said I had a bad case of shyness. I end up having panic attacks all the time mostly one big one every day that lasts for around 3 or 4 hours.
I think however Iam getting better the attacks still come but I think im dealing with them better then before. The only thing I think I need is more support. My nan isnt intrested in helping me and my boyfriend likes the control he has over me, so I feel like im trying to get better all by myself.
I think im really getting better though since I do alot of things I wouldnt have done before, like going into centre of newcastle and also just being more independant.
anyway sorry it was so long hope it wasnt too boring.
thanks.