raz87
01-04-22, 16:31
Hi everyone, this is my first time on this site as I am looking for help and advice from people that may have experienced something similar.
I have suffered with anxiety for a number of years and was finally diagnosed with GAD back in 2019 after a particularly bad period. Since then i have been talking prescribed medication daily and had CBT counselling in 2019/20 which did help me quite a lot. When people ask me what i get anxious about it is difficult for me to explain other than i worry about being anxious and the thoughts and feelings that come with it due to past experiences where it has completely and utterly controlled every aspect of my life. I am in fear of going back to being like that. I worry about going anywhere in case i have a flare up, and trips away overnight are what i worry about the most.
Up until a week ago i felt like i had it under control and the past 2 years have been probably the best i have had (covid situation withstanding obviously). However i caught covid nearly two weeks ago and it seems to have completely hit me for 6, both physically and mentally. i could deal with the physical symptoms up to a certain point but over the last weekend my anxiety came back with a vengeance in a bad way. I spent 3-4 days feeling constant fear and dread and it was the lowest i think i have ever felt in my life. It came out of nowhere and really scared me as i was having such terrible thoughts that i hadn't had before, such as 'i can't cope with this much longer'. I have learned to be open about my anxiety disorder with people close to me and talking about it usually made me feel better, however this time it had no effect, i felt so desperate. I called the NHS crisis number although there was little that they could do for me so i have arranged for some further CBT sessions through my health insurer although these are not due to start for a couple of weeks (which i am aware is a lot quicker than what the NHS is offering as i was told there is a waiting list of 12 months currently).
I have relaxed somewhat in the past day or so and am able to think a bit more clearly but what i am worrying most about now is my health and an up coming event which is due to start a week today. I am the best man for one of my friends and i have organised a stag do in the lake district for 14 of us to go away for 2 nights. Prior to having covid, i was worried about going but that was normal for me and i felt like i had it under control. I was not considering not going on the weekend away. Since my recent anxiety attacks however going away next weekend is just dominating my thoughts and it is giving me dread and fear to the point where i now don't want to go. I feel like i need time to recover both physically and mentally from what i have been through over the past 2 weeks but as i am the best man i really don't want to let my mate down and feel that i will regret not going if i don't end up going. I feel a bit pathetic for feeling this way especially as this is something that most people look forward to and don't dread.
Firstly, has anyone else had a sort of 'relapse' following having covid, and secondly, does anyone have any advice as to what i should do. I could force myself to go and put a brave face on to try and get through it, but the way i feel at the moment, i really really don't want to go. I just want to switch off these thoughts.
Thanks for taking the time to read this and for any advice you may have for me.
I have suffered with anxiety for a number of years and was finally diagnosed with GAD back in 2019 after a particularly bad period. Since then i have been talking prescribed medication daily and had CBT counselling in 2019/20 which did help me quite a lot. When people ask me what i get anxious about it is difficult for me to explain other than i worry about being anxious and the thoughts and feelings that come with it due to past experiences where it has completely and utterly controlled every aspect of my life. I am in fear of going back to being like that. I worry about going anywhere in case i have a flare up, and trips away overnight are what i worry about the most.
Up until a week ago i felt like i had it under control and the past 2 years have been probably the best i have had (covid situation withstanding obviously). However i caught covid nearly two weeks ago and it seems to have completely hit me for 6, both physically and mentally. i could deal with the physical symptoms up to a certain point but over the last weekend my anxiety came back with a vengeance in a bad way. I spent 3-4 days feeling constant fear and dread and it was the lowest i think i have ever felt in my life. It came out of nowhere and really scared me as i was having such terrible thoughts that i hadn't had before, such as 'i can't cope with this much longer'. I have learned to be open about my anxiety disorder with people close to me and talking about it usually made me feel better, however this time it had no effect, i felt so desperate. I called the NHS crisis number although there was little that they could do for me so i have arranged for some further CBT sessions through my health insurer although these are not due to start for a couple of weeks (which i am aware is a lot quicker than what the NHS is offering as i was told there is a waiting list of 12 months currently).
I have relaxed somewhat in the past day or so and am able to think a bit more clearly but what i am worrying most about now is my health and an up coming event which is due to start a week today. I am the best man for one of my friends and i have organised a stag do in the lake district for 14 of us to go away for 2 nights. Prior to having covid, i was worried about going but that was normal for me and i felt like i had it under control. I was not considering not going on the weekend away. Since my recent anxiety attacks however going away next weekend is just dominating my thoughts and it is giving me dread and fear to the point where i now don't want to go. I feel like i need time to recover both physically and mentally from what i have been through over the past 2 weeks but as i am the best man i really don't want to let my mate down and feel that i will regret not going if i don't end up going. I feel a bit pathetic for feeling this way especially as this is something that most people look forward to and don't dread.
Firstly, has anyone else had a sort of 'relapse' following having covid, and secondly, does anyone have any advice as to what i should do. I could force myself to go and put a brave face on to try and get through it, but the way i feel at the moment, i really really don't want to go. I just want to switch off these thoughts.
Thanks for taking the time to read this and for any advice you may have for me.