Orchid44
07-06-22, 23:05
Hi all. I am trying so hard not to continue in this cycle. I’ve had HA for many years (I’m 36). For a few years, I managed to focus on my kids and get off the train (somewhat). Anyway, currently I’m once again, in a bad place. In the past couple weeks, I have had 4 moles removed (all came back fine but that’s prob what started this current cycle since I’ve had extreme fear of melanoma before) and I went to new derm since I couldn’t get in with my usual for awhile and of course I could not be patient - and she suggested I see ophthalmologist for a mole on white part of my eye even though my optometrist always said it was fine. So I made urgent call to get in with one (said it looked fine). Then I thought I had cervical/vaginal cancer because I felt bumps in there (why do I go looking for problems?). Made urgent call and was able to see nurse practitioner but not my usual OB. She said all looked fine (I of course worried she was wrong or missed something but tried to move on) So you’d think I’d be good then? Nope. Started worrying about some reoccurrent upper stomach pain I had (sharper type pain that wouldn’t be horrid but I’d have to lie down awhile and it would feel better but happened every couple weeks or more for a several months (that stopped many months if not almost a year ago now). I never went to Dr for it because I guess I was in a “good place” at the time. I also worry that is connected to some possible reflux I might have (dentist noticed enamal erosion damage in teeth but I have no heartburn or noticeable reflux, went to ent said I could have asymptomatic reflux and suggested I take Pepcid but I haven’t yet) - the only thing is I get gaggy a lot ever since I had morning sickness a few years ago- so that could be related to damage or my mind also connects it to my cancer worries of course. I feel like the urge to gag could be anxiety related but who knows. Anyway, now I’m worrying about stomach pains I don’t even have anymore and thinking I have stomach cancer or something and I don’t want to be like this anymore. If I had stomach cancer or something in that area, my pains would have gotten worse not better right?