View Full Version : Having a moan..........again
Hi guys
Sorry I've come on to moan again. Just feel this is the best way to deal with things. Not having a good day today but i do know why. Its my Nan's funeral tomorrow so I guess i've got that going round in my head and i'm doing the guilty bit at the moment. You know "wish i had gone to see her more" probably the normal stuff when someone dies. Also last night found out that my partner isn't come back till about the 22nd April, his work up in Lancashire is carrying on a bit longer than what we thought. And we're getting married end of may so i've been left with organising things and i'm stressing. Woke with aches and pains and feeling like i couldn't breathe properly, went for a walk and i've calmed down a bit now. Sorry about having a moan, but being able to write it down does kinda help.
Take care
xx
Hi Tracy,
Will be thinking of you tomorrow...
Everyone would be feeling emotional and stressed with all those events coming up.
Look after yourself properly sleep - food- water- socializing, exercise and relaxation are all vitally important.
Guilt is the emotion we use to beat ourselves up with - it's totally self imposed and you don't need it.....
Most times ( big generalisation - sorry) when we make ourselves feel guilty - if we had that exact same time again, with the exact same circumstances but without the benefit of hindsight we'd do exactly the same again..
You vent as much as you like
Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance
hello Tracy,
Best of luck for tomorrow. I'm sure it will be very difficult for you but you will pull through. We all have regrets after people die - don't let yourself get too down about it.
Sarah :D
I think I can understand where you are coming from, Tracey.
Because my parents split when I was young, I went without seeing my aunts for decades and felt really awkward about it.
In that time, some had died, but eventually caught up with one in November and it was a big relief, and I was not stressed that day at all.
How are you feeling about making the funeral tomorrow? I find vital appointments and events such as this very stressful, as I know I'm prone to have an anxiety attack and get afraid I can't make it.
Its really important to vent at this time. Get all the support you can and take care.
Ray
Hi Ray
Right now i have to say i don't know how i'm feeling about it. I will make it tho, I have to you know, to say goodbye. But to be honest i'm not sure how i'll cope...you see this is the 4th death in as many months, in fact i lost 3 friends within two weeks last year and even tho i cried etc etc i don't think i really truly grieved for any of them, maybe i shut things out to a certain extent and i'm worrying that tomorrow everything might come to a head. Does that make sense at all? Actually today is turning out to be really naff. For some reason all i'm doing is thinking about "everything" thats happened to me over the last years and don't know why. Ok maybe i'm just having one of those "you're just feeling sorry for yourself Tracy" moments lol.
Sorry for rabbling on
xx
sorry to hear your not having too good a day i think we all have times when we get maudlin and feel sorry for ourselfs so your not on your own with that one i hope tomorrow goes ok for you and your soon feeling a bit better
fan x
Tracy,
I am so sorry for all your losses. Especially losing those friends, it must have seemed that your world had just fallen to bits.
Did you ever take counselling for that, and do you think it would help now?
Be Brave
Ray
Tracy,
Sorry to hear about what you are going through at present. It all seems to come at once?
Deaths & funerals are always sad, & often guilty times, even for people who do not suffer with anxiety. You have lost a lot of 'close to you' people in a short time--& it kind of leaves one reeling.
I hope that tomorrow goes as well as can be expected & 'saying goodbye' helps you to move forward again.
Moan & vent as much as you need/want to!
Linda. x
Tracy,
we've never spoken, but i just wanted to say that i hope it all goes as well as can be expected tomorrow.
take care,
henri x
ps i don't think you should apologise for 'coming on to moan again' - i reckon that venting your feelings is a good idea. "better out than in" and all that…
Thank you ALL so much for your kind words. I'm still feeling unsure about how it will all go but I'm hoping that after tomorrow i can start to concentrate on the future again.
Ray - No i never had counselling, just never had time and also (without going into more of my problems) I have got a couple of very personal issues that happened to me when i was younger and even tho i haven't forgotten, i don't think i want them all bought up again.
Thank you all once again.
Take care
Tracy
xx
Hi Tracy,
Just to let you know, I have been through so many losses, and one of the reasons I am like I am now is because I didn't grieve properly. So what if it all comes to a head at the funeral, it is good for you. It is not good to let the grief build up (thats what I have done) so if you can let go, you should. Hope you are ok today but do not feel bad about being upset.
Take care,
Linda.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">sorry to hear your not having too good a day i think we all have times when we get maudlin and feel sorry for ourselfs so your not on your own with that one i hope tomorrow goes ok for you and your soon feeling a bit better
fan x
<div align="right">Originally posted by FAN - 14 February 2005 : 16:20:28</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
nomorepanic
15-02-05, 19:06
Tracy
How did it go today - hope you are ok?
Nicola
Hi Nicola
Well I got thru it. Once when we were sitting at my Auntie's house waiting for the cars did i start to feel like i couldn't go. But i think that was because everyone was turning up and i felt smothered. So went outside for same air and a ciggie and felt a bit better. And it didn't all come to a head like i thought it might, now whether that was me fighting it and telling myself not to i don't know. Just feel totally exhausted now but i guess thats to be expected. Trying to cheer up now and get packed, i'm off to see John (partner) up in Lancashire tomorrow but just got that "i really can't be bothered" mood at the moment. I'm sure it'll go. Well has to can't go up there with no clothes and you know what us women are like when we pack lol.
Tracy
xx
Well done Tracy for going and doing so well.
Have a good time up in Lancs
Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance
nomorepanic
15-02-05, 20:05
Tracy
Well done for coping so well today.
I hope you get packed ok and have a nice time at the partners.
We will be thinking of you.
Try and get an early night tonight and don't pack the kitchen sink like I do when I go away!
Nicola
Tracy,
Sounds as though you coped well today.
Well done!
Hope you have a good break in Lancashire.
Linda. x
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