Sweating at Night

[Punky789]

I think I am just in need of a big reality check. My mind knows I'm being irrational but I also can't seem to actually comprehend that fact.

My health anxiety centers around me and my kids. It's worse when I think something is going on with one of my kids, which is what is happening now.

In July, so just barely over 5 months ago, I noticed I could feel a lymph node on my toddlers neck. It felt/feels like it is right on the back muscle of her neck, around what google told me would be the posterior cervical region (which google also told me was a horrble no-good place to feel a lymph node). We had had a cold.rip through the house at the end of June that lasted into the first two weeks of July. It was about two weeks after the toddler was better that I noticed the node. Off to the doctor we went.

My doctor is great. They have been my doctor literally since my birth. They get my fears/anxieties and work with me. So, they felt the spot on the neck and basically said, "yeah, no big deal. It's pretty common to be able to feel nodes in that 'chain'"

Since then I try not to think about it. I feel like sometimes I can see the spot where the node protrudes. Especially when my toddler would fall.asleee in the car seat with their head tilted far. But no one else has ever been able to see what I see, so I figure I am just hyper aware.

This leads me to now. We have a cold again. A genuinely horrble cold that might actually be RSV. The whole household has been taken down. Even the dog is acting off lol

But my brain, the traitor that she is, told me "hey, you should feel for that node on Toddler's neck". So I did. And it's still there. I don't think it feels any bigger. It is entirely mobile. It feels like a bean full of jello that slips around under the skin freely. But it makes me feel so panicked.

And then yesterday, the toddler woke up and felt clammy to the touch....but also vomited right after waking. But then I felt on hyper alert about night sweats and being tied to that lymph node.

We bed share so I found myself constantly touching the toddlers back/legs to see if they were clammy. And they weren't...until they were. Felt cool and clammy on back and legs and then around hairline. Back and legs were covered by the blanket. Arms that were not under the blanket were just cold to the touch and dry. The hairline, well my toddler has a riotous mass of thick curls, so I'm not overly surprised there.

We have a polyester sheet on the bed, a thick waterproof pad under where toddler sleeps, and an Ikea duvet that isn't too heavy but heavier for winter. Toddler was just wearing a thin nightdress. I lowered the blanket to see if the clammy feeling persisted and it didn't. Now toddler is laying beside me fast asleep and the areas uncovered by the blanket are dry and cool to the touch.

But still my mind is racing and my inner alarm is going off screaming all these horrble scenarios. We don't have any weight loss, actually toddler was up a pound at last weight check. They do scratch themselves sometimes and every time I'm like, Oh god, this is a symptom of something bad!

I'm trying to tell myself that it's just a bit of sweat. I can remember sweating in my slwee as a child because I would cry for my dad to come and tie my hair up. Also trying to tell myself it's probably part of this cold (which is the reason I've been awake for hours myself). But still. I feel so panicked about all of this. Am I being irrational? I am, aren't I? If you were the parent iny shoes would you be concerned? No one else I've talked to is ever concerned, though the sweating is a new development of just yesterday and today.

[ankietyjoe]

Am I being irrational? I am, aren't I?

Massively.

You need to get a grip on the health anxiety before you pass it on to your children too. Your brain isn't being a traitor, that's removing the responsibility of this from you.

Every time you feel you need to check them, walk away. Every time you recognise a health anxiety habit, stop yourself and tell yourself 'no'. Out loud if necessary.

Even asking here if you're being irrational is part of the habit process. You need to be internally ok that children get sick, all the time.

And of course, never google. If you believe that scratching is a symptom of something bad, it's because you will (at some point) have been checking symptoms online.

Health anxiety is a behavioral issue, not an anxiety issue. It's ALL down to the sufferer to change the habits. That's good though, because it means you have control.

[Adam1987]

My son is 4 and has a lymph node on the side of his neck which is pretty much always raised and visible because of all the colds he gets. He also gets sweaty at night and we've always called him a sweaty baby.

[Punky789]

I do genuinely appreciate the replies (and the reality check). A few hours after I posted this my infant (three month old little thing) woke up and it became apparent that the "cold" I thought we had was a little more than that and we were off to the children's hospital.

Four children and 14 years of parenting and I had never heard of RSV until this year! Thankfully little baby is all fine, though everyone in the family was knocked for six for a good two weeks total.

Thanks again for the advice and support. For the record, the "night sweating" didn't happen at all again after that one evening/early morning.

[Elise]

I’m so glad your baby is fine, RSV seems to be on the rise (from what I’ve seen, anyway)
My nephew was in ICU back in December, at only ten days old and it was suspected he had this. He was touch and go and on a ventilator, it turned out to be a heart condition but anyway my point is… he’s now a chubby, healthy, happy little thing! His progress has been amazing, babies are EXTREMELY resilient - not that they should have to be, poor little things!
It’s normal to worry about your kids, they are your babies after all. My health anxiety actually came from my parents being the opposite, I felt I couldn’t even talk to them about being ill growing up… it was always ‘you’re fine. Id know if there was something wrong. Now don’t mention it again or I’ll be cross.’ etc etc (probably to do with them being doctors and seeing serious cases each day)
You just need to find the balance between these two extremes. It sounds like you’re all on the mend now and next time your health anxiety flares up, think back to this scenario and how everything turned out OK in the end. Again im so pleased your baby is ok 💐