Will things ever get better??!!

[sharoncjb]

I have suffered from health anxiety for years, the first time I can remember well was when I felt like I couldn't breathe properly at 13 - since then it has been one big fight with it, and to be honest I am now just so fed up feeling like it.

I am 39 years old and I think to be honest for the last two years there is really not a morning when I don't wake up and wonder what I am going to have to worry about today. I have the feeling every morning that I am going to die from something, it is just so awful, why can't I just stop all these feelings. I currently have a small cyst to worry about but my doctor has assured me that it is nothing serious but no I cannot accept this and she has now referred me to have it removed given my history of being totally obsessive about it, now I have worked myself into such a frenzy that my chest hurts, feel like I have indigestion and someone sitting on my chest, which I am in turn talking myself into heart problems, I laugh about it but all my friends know that I am being serious and this is what I am thinking, my chest hurts and I feel like I cannot breathe properly, they are all symptoms that I have had before, and to top it off I feel like my throat is constricting, which too is a symptom I have had many times before. I just feel so fed up with these feelings of doom all the time, it really is an awful way to spend my life and as hard as I try to stop myself being like it - there is no way out.

I am now just really fed up with feeling like this all the time, I feel a burdon to all my friends and feel that I just drive everyone mad with my constant asking for reassurance that I am fine and that I am worrying unnecessarily, please tell me I am not alone and help me try and stop these feelings, with some ideas.

I have a wonderful partner and three great children who I love dearly and I must stop these thoughts, I just try and tell myself why worry about things that aren't wrong but at the same time I don't believe there is nothing wrong and that is what is so hard. I am tired of the constant battle that goes on in my head, today I feel physically worn out and could shut my eyes and sleep - if I wasn't stressing over the feeling in my chest, I even feel sick too which just adds fuel to the fire!!

Any ideas or anyone who would like to chat please reply or PM me, this website is at least one place where there are people who feel the same.

Thanks for taking the time to read.

S

[nomorepanic]

Sharon

Have you asked the GP to be referred for CBT?

Also read the symptoms page on here as it explains why we get the problems we do so may reassure you.

[sharoncjb]

Thanks I have asked GP for a referral for CBT but apparently it cannot be done on the NHS, and I have to be honest, if I could guarantee I could know it would work I really wouldn't mind going it alone and paying privately but I just don't know how something is going to change almost a lifelong thing!!

Believe me I have spent hours and days searching through this website for all the people who feel the same and it is a godsend that this site exists because I feel so alone and feel that people feel I am really silly for worrying and stressing like I do but maybe one day I will find an answer and be able to accept it and live like it, I am just so tired of feeling the way I do every single day.

Thanks again

[nomorepanic]

Sharon

They are lying and HAVE to refer you. Read this from the Help website page on the left....

Be aware of the National Institute for Clinical Evidence guidelines for anxiety and depression. These are fairly new out so if you feel you are consistently not being listened to or getting the help you need, you have a point of reference to use to to start off further discussions with your doctor.

Clinical guidelines are recommendations by NICE on the appropriate treatment and care of people with specific diseases and conditions within the NHS.

They are based on the best available evidence. Guidelines help health professionals in their work, but they do not replace their knowledge and skills.
These are the guidelines in full.
Anxiety - http://www.nice.org.uk/page.aspx?o=235402
Depression - http://www.nice.org.uk/page.aspx?o=235369
Self harm - http://www.nice.org.uk/page.aspx?o=213680
PTSD - http://www.nice.org.uk/page.aspx?o=248148

CBT is the recommended treatment for HA you may like to know.

[sharoncjb]

Thanks Nicola

The website you recommend is currently unavailable under major re-construction, but the next time I am at the GP I will ask them again to refer me, when I asked before all they did was refer me to a phychiatrist who then enrolled me on an anxiety management course, and I did attend the sessions but really felt it wasn't for my health anxiety, however, I did attend all sessions but they only told me things I already know so it didn't have any effect at all.

I will keep on at them, I would be more than willing to give it a go, anything has to be worth trying, especially at the moment, as I feel that everything is starting to pile up around me again.

Thanks again
Sharon

[nomorepanic]

Ok the main website is here......

http://www.nice.org.uk/

[sharoncjb]

So all you kind people, please tell me that I am not the only one feeling these symptoms and that they are just symptoms of anxiety and not something horrible like my silly little brain is telling me - please tell me I'm just being silly and they are all my brain working overtime

Thanks

[julie41]

Hi
I know exactly how ya feel honey cause i feel like this every day to.I wake up every morning thinking here we go again.I always feel ill but deep down i know its all in my head well at least i hope it is.I keep thinking to myself im not gonna be here this time next year its such a horibble feeling.I love going to bed cause i forget all about it when im asleep.I continuely feel drained and tired and feel like i cant be bothered to do anything,and just wanna curl up and sleep.I cant imagine feeling like this for the rest of my life.If ya wanna chat at anytime pm me and if we get to know each other better perhaps we can exchange numbers but ill leave that up to you. I alawys feel better if i talk to someone who understands.
Take care of yourself
Love Julie xxxx

[anxious]

Hi Sharon,

i too have had ha for 25yrs. I turned 40 this year and really don't want this to be there for the rest of my life. I'm trying CBT for the (3rd!) time and honestly i am trying but its such a habbit with me, i just don't know. I'm really struggling at the moment and totally sympathise.
You are not alone. Feel free to pm me - anyone:hugs:


love anx xx

[strawberrie]

hi Sharon, you are not alone, i could've written that post myself. I spend so much time worrying that i am ill, I feel like i am just wasting my life. It's so tiring. Like you I have a happy family life and its such a shame not to just be able to enjoy it and let go of all these fears.

I hope you can get your cbt sorted out. Do you take any medication? Personally i have found medication very helpful, although not everyone wants to go down that route.:shrug:

I would recommend the book 'It's not all in your head' by Asmundson and Taylor, it is all about health anxiety and it definitely made me understand what was going on in my head better!

Take care :hugs:

mag

[sharoncjb]

Thank you so much to you all for taking the time to read and thank you even more for replying - it is such a relief to know that I am not alone and that there are people who I can talk to who feel the same - like I said I think if I could accept the way I am it would be better for everyone but how can you accept the way I make myself feel every single day of my life - silly moo!!!

I would love to hear from anyone who would like to chat and I am on the site a lot of the time and find it a godsend.

Thanks again

Sharon