SarahNM76
26-04-23, 21:14
Hi everyone, I was a member here years ago but have started a new account as I can't remember my log in details. I wish I could because then I could read through and see that I have been this bad before and got through it... so will again!
Anyway, I was doing 'ok' until earlier in the year when I started to get the odd waves of panic again but they weren't too bad and weren't every day. Then I fell over one night when I was walking the dog, tore ligaments in my ankle and had to have 4 weeks off work wearing a moon boot, or whatever they're called. My routine went completely out of the window, couldn't work/drive/walk the dog/go food shopping on my own - Either my partner went alone or I'd go with him.
For the first 2 weeks I felt anxious, like I just couldn't relax at all. I do get like that on my days off anyway but this was even worse, like constantly anxious, crying, waves of panic. I decided to go to the doctors who suggested anti depressants but I said I didn't really want to go on those so he gave me propranolol instead which I was too scared to take. I went back and spoke to the nurse who said because I was over 45 and suffering with anxiety to try HRT so I had the patches and my god they made me feel soooo much worse. I went back to work a week after starting on them and I was having panic attacks and constant anxiety. I'm a community carer so I'm either sat in the car on my own or visiting the clients. Between my calls I'd be listening to Claire Weekes audios, anxiety audiobooks, relaxation recordings, googling. I know these things probably make me focus on the anxiety more but at the same time I feel like they're the only things that helped me get through the day. I even took my blood pressure machine to work with me a few times and thank god my BP and heart rate were always ok because I dread to think how I'd have been if it wasn't.
I stayed on the HRT for a month and then came off it 3 weeks ago. When I pulled the patch off I spent the night throwing up so I don't think they did me much good at all. I had a day or 2 where I felt a bit better and felt like I was getting back on track but then BOOM the anxiety came back and it's been relentless ever since. From the second I open my eyes in the morning the horrible churning stomach and horrible all over nervous feeling is there and it lasts all day. I feel like I'm fighting a panic attack off all the time. Nothing seems to help me. I have tried the propranolol a few times now (only 5 tablets over a couple of weeks). I've had one today but then I sit and obsess over my blood pressure and heart rate, they also make me feel really tired, woozy and a bit sick.
Over the last few weeks I've bought even more anxiety books, a weighted blanket, CBD oil (that I daren't have), Bachs remedies. I know I'm feeding the anxiety but it's so strong lately that I can't ignore it and just seem to be trying to find 'something' that will help me.
I always feel like every symptom is going to kill me. Even normal things like being hot, cold, hungry or tired set it off. It's got to the stage where I don't want to go out but at the same time I feel just as anxious when I'm at home.
Any advice please....Sorry for the long post xx
Anyway, I was doing 'ok' until earlier in the year when I started to get the odd waves of panic again but they weren't too bad and weren't every day. Then I fell over one night when I was walking the dog, tore ligaments in my ankle and had to have 4 weeks off work wearing a moon boot, or whatever they're called. My routine went completely out of the window, couldn't work/drive/walk the dog/go food shopping on my own - Either my partner went alone or I'd go with him.
For the first 2 weeks I felt anxious, like I just couldn't relax at all. I do get like that on my days off anyway but this was even worse, like constantly anxious, crying, waves of panic. I decided to go to the doctors who suggested anti depressants but I said I didn't really want to go on those so he gave me propranolol instead which I was too scared to take. I went back and spoke to the nurse who said because I was over 45 and suffering with anxiety to try HRT so I had the patches and my god they made me feel soooo much worse. I went back to work a week after starting on them and I was having panic attacks and constant anxiety. I'm a community carer so I'm either sat in the car on my own or visiting the clients. Between my calls I'd be listening to Claire Weekes audios, anxiety audiobooks, relaxation recordings, googling. I know these things probably make me focus on the anxiety more but at the same time I feel like they're the only things that helped me get through the day. I even took my blood pressure machine to work with me a few times and thank god my BP and heart rate were always ok because I dread to think how I'd have been if it wasn't.
I stayed on the HRT for a month and then came off it 3 weeks ago. When I pulled the patch off I spent the night throwing up so I don't think they did me much good at all. I had a day or 2 where I felt a bit better and felt like I was getting back on track but then BOOM the anxiety came back and it's been relentless ever since. From the second I open my eyes in the morning the horrible churning stomach and horrible all over nervous feeling is there and it lasts all day. I feel like I'm fighting a panic attack off all the time. Nothing seems to help me. I have tried the propranolol a few times now (only 5 tablets over a couple of weeks). I've had one today but then I sit and obsess over my blood pressure and heart rate, they also make me feel really tired, woozy and a bit sick.
Over the last few weeks I've bought even more anxiety books, a weighted blanket, CBD oil (that I daren't have), Bachs remedies. I know I'm feeding the anxiety but it's so strong lately that I can't ignore it and just seem to be trying to find 'something' that will help me.
I always feel like every symptom is going to kill me. Even normal things like being hot, cold, hungry or tired set it off. It's got to the stage where I don't want to go out but at the same time I feel just as anxious when I'm at home.
Any advice please....Sorry for the long post xx