Regrets now convinced its something

[chatty girl]

I did something about three weeks ago that I regret immensely, I had oral on both sides with a guy I know and have known for a around 2 years. But we are both attached. I know some of you will want to voice your judgement but trust me I'm beating myself up everyday for what happened.

Inside I'm absolutely terrified. I saw him on a Sunday, he was pretty rough inside me, it wasn't in a bad way, the Monday after I started to feel like I needed to wee often but there wasn't much there. I tried to pretend it wasn't a problem, Thursday I developed white spots on one tonsil that spread a little. I've had tonsillitis lots so guessed that was what it was. I went to the walk in the following Saturday (Kings coronation) they tested mu urine and said white blood cells and protine, they put me on nitrofurantoin. The more I thought the more scarred o got so under doctors instructions about 5 days later I had a full STI check and did another urine sample for them to send off while I was put back on nitrofurantoin again. The STI tests all came back negative. My urine sample was inconclusive, showed red/white blood cells but they couldn't grow anything from it. So I had to repeat it, when I did this time I noticed lots of white bits floating around in it. I've never noticed those before. Anyway, I got called in to doctors and it showed the same. She put me on another antibiotic sachet thing and wants me to re test this Friday.

I'm absolutely terrified I've got bladder cancer now! I'm constantly checking my wee and there are these white bits floating in it all the time! Now I don't know if the urge to wee more often is in my head or real!!! I feel like I'm going nuts, why would there be the cells if they can't grow anything. One part of me says he has done something or given me something but then a massive part is saying bladder cancer. I got the impression of the next test comes back same I will be referred to the specialist. I can't talk to anyone about it which I know is my own fault but I'm scarred. So scarred. Can anyone relate

Thanks for reading

[longnovember]

I just had a urine test 2 weeks ago and noticed white bits floating in it too. The urinalysis was normal, I think everyone has the white bits.

[ErinKC]

If there's no infection, your symptoms are probably just a combo of irritation from the sex and anxiety. I think white bits in urine can just be regular vaginal discharge that gets washed down with the pee. I've definitely seen this before in my totally normal urine samples. All your STI tests have been negative. You're beating yourself up because you're having anxiety/regrets about the encounter itself. There's no reason you'd suddenly have bladder cancer. All your symptoms point to the physical effects of rough sex and anxiety. Forgive yourself for the indiscretion and trust the doctors!

[peg54321]

Hi, I'm not sure what you mean by oral on "both sides"... but that made me want to tell you to try and keep "sides" separate so that there's not cross exposure of germs. Anyhow, the body and immune system is very resilient so trust your immune system. Having said that it is quite easy to get UTI's from sex. That's just the female anatomy, everything being close together, so to speak. I think it's important that you remember to increase your self confidence to say "no" or "stop" if someone is being rough with you. You deserve better. Also agree with the above poster - give yourself a break, stop being hard on yourself. Trust the doctors. If you picked up anything from this guy - they'll find it and treat it.

[BlueIris]

No judgement here - people are complicated. As others are saying, it's likely because the sex was rough. Give yourself time to heal both physically and mentally; cancer is incredibly unlikely.

[ServerError]

No judgement from me either: let he who is without sin and all that. I just wanted to add to the good advice you've already had and suggest that some of what you're feeling is probably a consequence of doing something of which you're not especially proud. It's not quite the same thing, but we all know if we eat too much of the wrong thing or we drink too much, we can feel quite bad about ourselves. If you're feeling guilty about what happened, it wouldn't be a surprise if your anxious mind started firing off. Try and be kind to yourself and gradually any negative feelings about what happened should pass. If you do feel guilty at all, you'll have to forgive yourself and see if there's any lessons you can take from the experience, because what else can you do?

[chatty girl]

Thank you for your comments, I gave in my next urine sample today, so scarred it will be bad again and then I don't know what happens x