cattia
19-07-23, 21:07
I've not been on here in a while. This isn't quite so much my normal HA post, as this is about soemthing that I actaully seem to have that I'm not overly anxious about having, but I'm more anxious about what it means or could mean in the future. For a few years now I have been getting swollen ankles, especially when I sit down all day. It's got worse recently and I have also been getting heavy feeling legs that sometimes ache and ocassionally burning in my feet and lower legs. I also get cramps at night quite a lot. Obviusly I googled and came up with chronic venous insufficiency. I am not overweight but do have other risk factors, being female, having had three children, hsitory of leg injury, visible spider veins and history of vein issues in my family. The Dr thinks I probably do have some level of vein insufficiency altough this was only a telephone consultation not face to face. He said I need to keep active, try to take breaks from sitting and elevate my legs.
The thing is I am only 46. Although I have had crippling health anxiety on and off for my whole life, this is the first time I've ever had anything actually chronically wrong with me. I think more than anything it has affected my confidence. I see a lot of people on here saying 'how many times have you thought you had xyz and then you were wrong about it' but when I read that, I always think just by the law of averages, eventaully you will have something wrong. We all will! crossing the road safely every day is no guarantee you will never get hit by a car. So I suppose it's just made me really realise that I'm not always going to dodge those bullets that I am always so afraid of. And even though I knew that logically anyway, it feels very real to have something that even though it isn't that serious and there are much worse things, is never going to go away. I can mange it but I'm neevr going to not have it again. It's ironic that I feel that way about a circulation issue when in fact that's been true of my mental health for years. I manage that but it's also chronic. I don't beleive i will ever be anxity free.
Anyway, just wanted to write it down, as I hope someone else can realte. Thank you for reading this far!
The thing is I am only 46. Although I have had crippling health anxiety on and off for my whole life, this is the first time I've ever had anything actually chronically wrong with me. I think more than anything it has affected my confidence. I see a lot of people on here saying 'how many times have you thought you had xyz and then you were wrong about it' but when I read that, I always think just by the law of averages, eventaully you will have something wrong. We all will! crossing the road safely every day is no guarantee you will never get hit by a car. So I suppose it's just made me really realise that I'm not always going to dodge those bullets that I am always so afraid of. And even though I knew that logically anyway, it feels very real to have something that even though it isn't that serious and there are much worse things, is never going to go away. I can mange it but I'm neevr going to not have it again. It's ironic that I feel that way about a circulation issue when in fact that's been true of my mental health for years. I manage that but it's also chronic. I don't beleive i will ever be anxity free.
Anyway, just wanted to write it down, as I hope someone else can realte. Thank you for reading this far!