depression from coming off medication

[bethyboo]

hello there, i came off effexor 4 months ago, ive spent 9 years on and off medication for acute anxiety and general anxiety and panic attacks. since i have come off medication i have completely lost myself. i am depressed most of the time, every day i wish i was back on medication to relief the constant battle of fighting my own irrational and insecure thoughts. i just want some peace and while i ahve alwasy had problems i ahve never felt like i was depressed. i have two lovely boy sand am coping..just about but i can feel myself gettign worse. i lay in bed every night overanalzing and irrationally worrying about a million things at once and i feel like crying and screaming for someone to just understand and take it away. is this still an after effect of coming off medication or is this the real me?? has anyone out there been on medication for a long period of time and actually coem through the other side??? or is this the real me..insecure, over sensitive, depressed, uncomfortable with myself and bloody bloody miserabl?? i am so so so tired of beign like this. i went to the doctors yesterday and he gave me beta blockers but they dont really touch the surface of my feelings and thoughts, im arranging councilling but is this really going to help?? has anyone actually come out the other side of beign on medication for so long and managed to stay off medication. i am just so lost x

[lesleyB]

Hi, I am sorry your feeling so bad at the moment. You don't say how you came of the meds, could be you came of to quickly, this happened to me and after a while had to go back to a higher dose, I feel ok at the moment. Also why did you come of the meds? There is a better time ahead but it might take time to get there. Look after yourself and keep going for your boys.:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Lesleyb

[bethyboo]

funny u should say that..i came off them cold turkey, the worst 4 weeks of my life but i got through it to an extent. i came off them because i was drinking everyday and smoking cannabis and i was meant to do it in a week and then start a new set off anti depressants but after the week i felt okish so decided to try and see if i could just be medication free. 2 weeks later however i had the worst depression i had ever had but still i wanted to give myself a chance, i kept telling myself it was the side effects which i still believe and while im alot better than i was..i still dont feel right...i dont want to go back on meds..its been such a hard slog and i feel glad that i managed it but i still dont feel right????? i also stopped drinking except for friday nights (as was drinking a bottle of wine a night) and have stopped smoking canabis(which i know contributed)..so why do i still feel so rubbish??