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View Full Version : Lung cancer fear is taking over my life



JennPaige
04-11-23, 07:54
42 year old female living in the US. Currently uninsured until January 1

I used to socially smoke but haven't picked up a cigarette in 4 years.

My issue started 8 weeks ago with a random, intermittent, focal breast pain in the upper center left breast. After 2 weeks it was still there off and on. I couldn't locate any lumps or anything different from my usual self checks. I found a clinic that does free breast exams for people over 40. I was told they didn't feel anything concerning and put it down to hormones. The pain still shows up, but is much less frequent.

After the breast appointment (6 weeks ago), I started getting an intermittent, aching pain near my left shoulder blade. I thought I had pulled a muscle but 3 weeks later and it's still there, off and on. Taking a bath and lying down make it feel better, so I'm trying to tell myself it's muscular and it's not healing because I am very busy during the day. Meanwhile my anxiety is ramping up, especially after Dr. Google says shoulder blade pain that doesn't go away can be a symptom of lung cancer. I go down the Google rabbit hole and see that hoarseness can also be a symptom and I start to notice my voice is crackly now and I feel like I need to keep clearing my throat.

3 weeks later and I'm starting to get this slight rib aching on the left and what feels like pressure under the left rib cage. There is also a lot of gurgling and growling that is hard to pinpoint. I can't tell if it's coming from my intestines near the rib cage or if it's actually coming from the lung area. More googling and now it tells me gurgling sounds can be pleurisy. Then I come across an article about malignant pleural effusion and see that it most often happens from lung or breast cancer that has spread. Now I'm panicking that my breast pain is not actually hormonal, but is cancer and it has spread to my lungs and is causing all of these problems on my left side.

I don't have shortness of breath. I see that pleurisy causes sharp pain when breathing in deep, which doesn't happen to me. My appetite has been terrible, but I'm also extremely stressed and anxious and not sleeping well. I lie awake at night reading articles and worrying. I have moments throughout the day where I feel normal, especially when my mind finally frees itself from this anxiety prison. I could have given myself a stomach ulcer worrying about all of this and I'm kind of hoping that's the case. By the time I get to see a proper doctor, it will be 4 months since all of this began. Thanks for letting me put this out there. I've been holding onto it for so long because of all of my past health anxiety (I've diagnosed myself with liver cancer, melanoma and a brain tumor and have had none of them). So I keep this anxiety and worry to myself. Thank you anyone who reads this.

JennPaige
04-11-23, 15:48
Also, tomorrow is my birthday and I'm trying so hard to relax and let myself have fun. I can't enjoy food because I'm too stressed out to eat. I wish I could have a free day from my brain. I actually feel a lot better as far as my symptoms go. Very slight rib aching and no pain in my shoulder blade. Normally that would ease my anxiety, but I only got 4 hours of terrible sleep and I'm sure that is affecting my mind. This is no way to live.

JennPaige
05-11-23, 19:47
If I'm not allowed to talk to myself here, feel free to delete

Last night I took a benadryl so I could sleep. I only woke up once and felt rested when I woke up. I also have considerably less shoulder blade pain today. I can sense the tightness still there, but it's not enough to make me want to sit down, like usual. I am having a lot of rib tenderness below my armpit, right at the bra line. I keep rubbing and massaging the area. I also have a bit of the bloat feeling under my lower left ribs and a lot of gurgling and rumbling like you would with a hungry stomach.

I feel very tired today. Keep finding myself laying down. Maybe that's because of the benadryl I took last night. ��

Happy birthday to me.

jackieann3
05-11-23, 20:00
Happy birthday jennpaige sorry you haven't had any replies, I've just seen this and what you have described I had exactly the same for about 2 months and only this last couple of weeks just disappeared, I had this start since I had gastritis a while ago so not sure if it was anything to do with that and why it would have effected my ribs and all the bubbling as well, I was worried about all the same things as you so what ever it was has gone so I'm sure worry about it made it worse , hope this helps you x

JennPaige
05-11-23, 21:50
Thank you so much. It really does help ease the anxiety. I feel like if I could get my mind off of it, I would magically feel better, but anxiety is a beast like that. I feel very rational about most things in my life, but health anxiety takes over so badly. I know that there's a much bigger chance these are symptoms of something non life threatening and some days I'm more relaxed about it, but other days I feel like something awfully wrong is happening in my body and I go into panic mode.

But thank you for your kind words. I appreciate them so much.

Fishmanpa
05-11-23, 23:17
Nothing you've posted points in the direction you fear. Of course, if you're that concerned, seek real life professional help and opinions but based on experience, the 'Told Ya So Gang' will be standing by :winks:

FMP

JennPaige
05-11-23, 23:42
Lol, I welcome the "told you so" gang with open arms. I've had a breast exam and they've already confirmed that fear was null and void, but sometimes that health anxiety just doesn't care. January will be when I hopefully find out other fears are squashed. I'll probably be here venting in the meantime, while I'm I'm the waiting room. I appreciate the feedback :)

Fishmanpa
05-11-23, 23:46
:yesyes:

JennPaige
07-11-23, 21:32
Yesterday, I did a lot of laying around and being lazy. At the end of the night, I realized I had been enjoying myself so much, I didn't notice any pain or symptoms at all. Today was much different though. I've been up and moving around and it is driving me crazy. I have this new focal pain in my abdomen that feels like it could possibly be an ulcer. I wouldn't be surprised if I stressed myself into gut problems. The upper back pain seems worse today. Usually it subsides when I lie down, but today it's very persistent and gnawing. My ribs are very sore and tender and there is a ton of gurgling, noise and movement happening under the rib cage. Yesterday was very nice and a low anxiety day. Today seems to be making up for Yesterday and I am in overdrive. I'm in an insurance waiting period and can't wait to finally get this taken care of.

.Poppy.
08-11-23, 01:38
I can empathize with how you feel. I've also had some pain I'm trying to get to the bottom of, and HA can be really rough.

Does it hurt when you press on your ribs, especially around the sternum? A lot of what you are describing kind of sounds like when I have a costochondritis flare. Sometimes weird exercise can bring on a flare, but anxiety can too.

JennPaige
08-11-23, 11:11
I do have a small amount of tenderness by the sternum, but most of it is on the outside of my ribs. Sometimes it feels like it's coming from the Inside of my body and not the ribs themselves, but it is very hard to tell. I have seen costochondritis come up a lot in my searches. It is definitely a possibility.

JennPaige
14-11-23, 18:48
Hey. Back again.

So I'm 95% sure my abdominal/rib discomfort is from some kind of digestive issue. I noticed after a night of drinking alcohol, the next morning, that discomfort was back 10 fold. I stopped drinking alcohol, caffeine and reduced my fat intake and the discomfort went away completely. I also don't have the crackling in my voice, so the lung cancer worry had been quelled.

What I worry about now is the breast issue. The doctor says he feels this is a hormonal issue, but the pain seems to move around. Sometimes it's in the middle of my breast, sometimes it hurts near my sternum, sometimes it's tender on the outter edge, only with the left breast. Sometimes my rib cage aches 2 inches below my armpit. The doctor can't feel anything worrying, I can't feel anything worrying, but this pain makes me hyper anxious. I'll be able to get a mammogram the first week of January, but in the meantime, the wait really isn't fun. I also still have this shoulder blade ache. It's not constant. Sometimes it goes away. It never gets worse, but now seems to have moved to my right shoulder blade as well. Sometimes it aches in the middle of my shoulder blades. Resting always eases it, but it never fully goes away. I don't know if it's tension from stress. My anxious brain says breast cancer was missed and now it's in my bones.

So that's my current situation. Lung cancer worry has morphed to breast cancer worry. Let's go January.