My first counselling session

[Lilith1980]

Hi all,

I had my first session yesterday. Was quite nervous beforehand, mainly because I knew I was going to cry and stupidly I feel like I'd be burdening the counsellor, or annoy him!! :blush:

Anyway, it was really good to talk about things, get things from my past out in the open and have the counsellor there giving suggestions about certain aspects of the past having contributed to the way I feel now, with my low self-worth.

I must admit I came out feeling the need to burst into tears again - he did say I wouldnt necessarily leave feeling ecstatic, because it doesnt work like that :)

My b/f asked how it went and I said it was good but I was in one of my "thinking" moments where I was just thinking alot about some of the conclusions I had come to. I think he thought I didnt want to tell him but I said that the counsellor honestly didnt say that much, he just let me talk about stuff.

I'm not sure what's going to be discussed in future sessions, my ultimate goal is to have more self worth, not trying so hard to please everyone and thinking of ME for a change. I dont know how we will get there but I'll take each session as it comes.

After the session, although I felt a bit teary, I had promised myself to a hair cut ready for Christmas. I don't like going to the hairdressers as I normally sit there feeling self-conscious and like I'm not good enough to be there. I went and got it done and felt good. I made conversation with the girl cutting my hair whereas I normally keep quiet, and I actually felt like I was worthy of treating myself :D

I've made a step in the right direction and I'm feeling more positive, I know I will probably have down days but it was always going to require work, but I'm ready for it xxxx

[Insomniac]

Hi Lilith

That sounds great. I had counselling last year and I was like you at first, you don't know what to expect. But I learnt that it is OK to think about myself sometimes, you don't always have to put everyone else first. You are worthy of being looked after, especially by yourself!

Sounds like you got on ok with your counsellor. That really helps. I think they guide you more than anything else, and help you see things more clearly. I have reduced my dosage of meds now and feel much more able to cope if I feel panic coming on.

Self-worth is a tough one. Low self-worth is usually a long time arriving, and can be a long way back, but you should be proud for making those first steps on your journey. Well done for the haircut too!!!! (I know just what you mean.) :yesyes: