A Life time of health worries!!!

[sharoncjb]

I just wonder if anyone can give some real help on how to undo a whole life of worrying about my health.

As I have written earlier I have always worried, since I was a teenager and now at 39 years old, I seem to be getting worse all the time. I really feel so very fed up with the feeling that I am always thinking.

There is not a single morning that I get up and don't wonder whats wrong with me, and I am so very fed up of this feeling of doom that I seem to have all the time, I am tired of these feelings and don't know how to get them to go away once and for all!!

I have indigestion and convince myself it is something with my heart, head ache, brain problems but then if your reading this - you know exactly how I am feeling i'm sure, but like I said I am tired of the constant fight that goes on in my head and am fed up constantly seeking reassurance of my friends and family or the doctor - it is not how I want to spend the next 30 days let alone possible the next 30 years.

I have three smashing children and feel that time is just passing by with me worrying constantly about what horrible terminal illness is going to take me away from them rather than enjoying every minute I can with them I spend the time ratty and stressing over my various aches and pains.

Will I ever get better and how can I learn to accept the way I am and live with it? Please please help me I am just so tired of feeling this way, and now I'm starting to worry that being tired is something wrong with me too!!!

There really is no hope!!!???!!!

Thanks
Shaz

[nomorepanic]

Shaz

The recommended and best cure for HA is CBT so I would get a referral for that asap.

[bac]

Hi Sharon.
I also have had HA since I was a teenager and feel exactly the same as you, I'm also around the same age so I really do know where you are coming from, its hard. I just try and concentrate on the kids, my two are both under 3 1/2 so they keep me busy. Distraction is my way.

Take care

[louwilliams]

aw sweetie i could have written that myself!!

It is such a horrible thing to have to deal with and sometimes I feel like it is all getting too much for me. I wish the days away and cant wait till I can get in bed and go to sleep-even though night times are pretty bad for me. i'm having CBT at the moment-which is predominately for the panic attacks and GAD but I feel I need most help with the health anxiety as I am learning to control the PA's and anxiety ever so slightly better,, but have no control whatsoever over the HA. i'm sick of it now. I have 2 children (9&10) and they are now so used to me being like this they have stopped asking me to take them places and explain to people if they overhear a conversation or me arranging a meeting or outing (eek), that I might be ill that day or may have to stay in bed, which is completely horrendous to have to listen to. they are suffering now because of my illness and i just want to get better so i can be a better mum for them. sorry, I know its a bit of a rant but i just want you to know your not alone with this

lou xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[smiley_baby1304]

i understand completely what you are going through and im only 16

its such a burden, but im sure there is hope
all of the people on this site are so nice and reassuring
you do need to put yourself first and seek out some counselling etc

good luck

[sharoncjb]

Hey thanks for all your replies I really appreciate it! It is really good to know that we are not alone in our worries and aches and pains - thanks again everyone!!

I am sure it will constantly be worrying up and down, some days will be better than others but I guess I will get through them all.

Thanks

[miss motown]

awww i do sympothise with you ive also suffered with the same problem for so many years only today i went for a health check at bupa cos i constantly get chest pains and im so convinced it was my heart it was very pricey and i couldent really afford it but i got the money together and went and i can honestly say it was money well spent i carnt see me stop worrieng cos thats all my life has been one big battle against ha but for now i can rest a little and stop the worry untill i get another pain somewere else lol

[lillady123]

Hi Sharon I would recomend you read Dr Claire Weekes book, self help for your nerves. Im following her advice at the moment and it really is working! Really I cant go on about this book enough. I read it once before and didnt take it in but now i am TRULY ready to get over health anxiety for good. The book explains how you should accept that all the thoughts, feelings etc is just anxiety. It explains lots of physical symptoms that I always thought must be something else, but they really are just anxiety. Once you understand all your symptoms are anxiety the book advises you accept it as just there, part of you dont try to fight or change it, just move slowly through life. Eventually, she says the anxiety passess because it just doesnt matter any more.

The facts are, scary as they may be, any of us can get any illness. Thats the awfulness. But what good does worryng about it do? This is my new outlook on it. I have been speaking via email to an 18 year old girl who has cancer. She is blind, disabled and has had cancer on and off since childhood. She is so positive though and enjoys her life to the full. She doesnt live in fear that the cancer will come back. She makes me feel ashamed to be honest.

If any one of us want to get better we can and after 6 years, i finally believe this.

[sharoncjb]

Hi

I did buy the Claire Weeks book Self Help for your Nerves but unfortunately could not get my head round it, I have had it for a good two years but I understand the theory behind it but getting the head round to accepting that it is just the fear that fuels more symptoms is the hard part, when you feel the ill feelings I analyse every single bodily feeling so much I convince myself that there must be something wrong, and at the moment I just feel the sinking feeling, I start off worrying about one thing now I've got the awful throat feelings, then my chest and can't breath properly - need I go on - life sucks I really wish I could get into my head that these are all my body's reactions to anxiety but it really is not easy to do and I truly don't believe I will ever be able to not be like this.

But thanks anyway, I will keep trying - I live in hope that one day I will get up and not think every day I have some awful illness that is going to get me this time - how sad!!

Thanks again
S

[lillady123]

I know it is really hard Sharon but please dont give up hope. I think one day you can beat it. Ive read success stories on this site and if they can beat it why not you huh? Next time you get all those symptoms just try telling yourself it is just anxiety, sort of argue with the voice that tells you something is wrong!

Always happy to help xx

[sharoncjb]

Thanks - believe me I really do try but I am feeling like it at the moment, and I believe I have some sort of bug mixed with the anxiety but I feel really strange and dizzy - not me at all - and I have the throat symptom, think I am getting congested and making me think throat has a lump and closing in and as hard as I try I tell myself it is anxiety but then my mind feels the symptoms again and bang no i'm ill again, it just goes on and on.

Thing is I know I will feel no better before christmas now, if anything it's going to get worse I have so much to do and so little time and now I start worrying I get even less done!!!

Thanks

[lillady123]

I really feel for u sharon coz Im exactly the same. I think "but this time it really is more than anxiety its different" things like that. But then i tell myself "ok so if it is more than anxiety, if i am ill then im ill, what can i do?" Then i just get on with whatever im doing even tho i fell really ill and wanna go home. I look at it as im gonna do what ive got to do even though feel ill. Its working so far x

[sharoncjb]

Well I am really pleased for you that you have found a way through and I hope that I will too, I will always keep trying but I just can't convince myself that the last bit, you know accept things they way they are as I can't change it, if only I could be that strong. I used to think it would get easier to live with this and that I would learn to cope and find it easier every time it happens but to be honest I think it gets harder to deal with and each time I am getting a bit worse, thanks for replying and trying to help it truly is so good to talk to people and by god do I need that.

Thanks

[Meewah]

Just one big happy worrying family. I use this forum as my extended family. I dont bother my nearest and dearest I just wince and moan on hear and all is well until the next pain.

I just worry that my kids may become worriers too. I keep telling them that you can do anything in life if you put your mind to it. If only I believed that too.

Merry Xmas

Mee

[sharoncjb]

Hi Meewah

Thanks for that - how true that is - I too worry that my children will become the same and I really wouldn't wish this on anyone let alone my children.

A merry christmas and very happy new year to you too.

Thanks
Sharon

[blacksheep]

All I can say is ask for professional help, CBT or hypnotherapy. There is a lot of information out there and things to read etc but really you (like me) are at a point where self help will be no help. Do not be afraid to ask for a referral for CBT through your GP and if they are not responsive then change Dr and find one that will take it seriously. I have had HA for years and it took me until last year to put my foot down with my Dr and demand he stopped calling me a hypochondriac...he did and finally listened!!! Therapy really is the only way, pills are ok but dont remove the cause and books are ok but they dont often work when you are so dragged down by HA.

[scouser1959]

i constantly worry about my health headaches are brain tumours, pains in chest are heart attacks, mouth ulcer is oral cancer, constipation is bowel cancer, i am sick of it, no one knows how awful it is living with this every single day 24/7 i am just about to start CBT but to be honest i am slowly giving up on any notion that this will ever go away.