View Full Version : non sociable:(

03-01-08, 00:17
i hate socialisings especially in high school i didnt make my first friend till end of year 7 and we only got along becasue i knew her from my primary school.This may sound stupid but it was really bad even though it was only year 7 we wasnt in the same classes i felt lonely in my lessons i would sit right at front and when we got in groups i was the only one sat on my own,but before that i use to go round on my own for 50 mins and sit on my own reading or when it was my day sit at library sitting far away from anyones as possible.even though in year 11 i met a few more friends which was awesome im still like that i hate going shopping or to shop i hate being round anybody i dont know.I thought i was being stupid i tried to go to clubs but id just sit alone.Im scared that people will judge me,or say something mean i know i shouldbe ableto buti just cant get round it i sorry to put you through my problems becasue its not that serious but to me it means everything and gets to me alot.:confused:

03-01-08, 00:24
Hi and welcome

Have you considered getting some help for this along the lines of self-esteem courses or assertiveness training that all aim to build your confidence?

You also need to make a concious effort to talk to people whenever you can and keep smiling and remaining positive.

If you go to clubs then don't sit alone - go and sit near people and you will soon see that people will talk to you. If you isolate yourself people think you want to be left alone so won't disturb you. Make an effort to sit near people and they will naturally talk to you.

Good luck.

03-01-08, 00:46
thank youforthe replyi have been to selfconcious groups it did work but latelyi can barely look in the mirror my bf says im "gawjuss"all the time butinsidei dont think i am i use to go to young carers and thats where i got the help i havent been for ages and everyone is friends what if they dont want to talk to me i havent been in ages andi dont wanna feel like i did at the youth club & becasue homework/coursework im in sixth form so its kinda hard to go to social clubs and do homework and stuff.

03-01-08, 17:57
Hi Fallenangel and :welcome:

I can relate to you a lot because I never had many friends at school and have always found socialising difficult. It's sometimes difficult to believe in yourself when your confidence isn't high but your boyfriend believes in you. I'm sure you trust him very much so have faith in his opinion because people will talk to you.

I've accepted that things like clubbing aren't for me so I don't force myself to do them. I prefer quiet pursuits and don't mind my own company so am content most of the time. Also, by opening up to others about my interests I've met people who I have things in common with. Try to break the problem of meeting people into small chunks which are easier to tackle. Perhaps you could join a club or simply try engaging in a little light chit chat while out and about?

Take care,

Mike :)