View Full Version : I have asked to go into hospital
I can't stand much more of this depression. The dreads are just getting bigger and bigger and the suicidal thoughts are more and more. I came to what felt like a realisation last night that the only way out of my personal hell was to end it all. I was as calm as calm could be and it felt truelly like a spiritual awakening. I really felt like I had come to a conclusion that spelt out happiness for me. I had to work hard to hold onto reality and remember the permanence of such a situation.
I know this is not the workings of a particularly sane mind so I shared it with my therapist today. I have told her all about my personal hell over the past couple of weeks and how I really and truelly can't stand much more of it.
She agreed that this was not particularly clever of me and is going to speak to my cpn today about the possibility of me going into hospital, to stay this time though.
I know hospital is not a nice place, but I think I am on an inevitable course to somewhere really bad if something extreme does not happen for me. I don't know if I will hear today or not as I am not supposed to be seeing my cpn until tomorrow. I kind of want it to happen sooner rather than later if it is going to happen at all but knowing my luck, there will be no beds and I will be left with my suicidal thoughts.
Happyone
xxx
Hello Happyone, this is a very brave decision on your part. Your request will be taken seriously if the powers that be consider that you a very real threat to yourself or others. A bed is likely to be found for you. Please do let us know over the course of the day how things are. Are the girls gone back to school? Is hubby around and supporting you?
:hugs:
honeybee3939
03-01-08, 12:09
Hi Happy
I have been keeping up with your threads and realised how you have been struggling latley. :hugs: :hugs: I think you did real well to discuss things with your CPN it must have been so hard for you. I truely hope the out-come is a positive step, I know its not nice to have to go in hospital but if things can improve for you and they can help then that can only be good.:hugs:
Thinking of you Happy hun:hugs: :hugs: keep us informed how things go.
love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxxx
happyone,
i just wanted you to know that im thinking of you, ive had severe depression in the past and my heart is breaking for you, as i know what your going through.
there will be a light at the end of the tunnel, one day for you.
i wish you all the best, take care
dawn x
happyone - things must be really tough at the moment but it is a positive step asking for help if you feel you really need it. hang on to the "permenance" realisation of ending it all - you simply want to stop feeling this way but ALL depressions are temporary and you will come out of the other side. do you truly want to leave your family and children in such a way and your life to be over with? i know a family where there son committed suicide and the devastation of what he did cannot be put into words - he overdosed and his mum found him and called an ambulance. the doctors thought he would survive and he woke up terrified in hospital regretting what he had done and was crying saying he didn;t want to die - literally minutes later he did. his mum is now on valium and antidpressants, his sister is on antidpressants and cannot function. this is not to make you feel guilty but to show the reality of taking your own life - it is simply NOT an option. i once read that if you were ready to leave this world - you would not have to commit what ammounts to an act of violence or "self murder" - you have the same will to live as anyone else - it is simply your emotions playing havoc with you. all you want is a break and your tired mind comes up with what it sees as the only solution but you have NOT reached the end of the road.
having had severe anxiety - i know what it can be like when you feel you cannot stand another minute but then literally weeks later - you cannot understand how you felt so low.
have you had cbt for your thoughts - i know the swings of mood are much more extreme in bipolar but it sounds as if the thoughts are being left to run amok and this will just send you deeper and deeper into a spiral of depression. it also needs like you may have to try and get your meds stabilised or have a change of meds.
thinking of you and sending lots of love. x
Just want to wish you all the luck and truly hope you will get well soon. I think your really brave and strong, because like you said you were at such a low ebb, but did a positive thing instead by asking for help. Hope your cpn gets you a place straight away.
Take care. Hugs
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Hi Happyone,
I'm so sorry to hear you are still feeling so low like this, as you know I too suffer with Bipolar and for those that have depression will also understand your feelings.
I honestly do feel that you are doing the very best thing. I had read afew of your past posts and was going to mention hospital stay, but you seemed adamont that you did not want to do this.
As you know I've needed stay in hospital in the past, because I too felt as low as you. There was no way out for me. I was sectioned and watched at all times. I didn't want to leave my children, but I truly did feel that they would be happier without me and what I thought would be a better mummy than myself. My thought's were all wrong back then.
My depression hit so low, I became delusional and Psychosis hit in. Hospital isn't a pleasant place, but sometimes is the only place to become well, especially if you have children. Even if you don't cry infront of them,.. they know, they sense your feelings, they love you and don't want you to be feeling this way, they want their mummy to be well.
Depression is hard enough as it is, it's difficult to look after ourselves let alone our little ones.
I'm unsure of all the med's you are taking, I know you are taking the same mood stabilizer as myself, but some people with BP do need to take anti-d's aswell as these. I did need to take various combination of med's aswell as mood stabilizers, as on it's own usually isn't enough.
It seem's that the doc's haven't found the right combination for you to become well, they will be able to do this for you whilst you stay in hospital. It will be a case of trial and error, but what other option do you have right now? You have fallen to rock bottom, you could become worse (this is where Psychosis comes in), please try and prevent yourself from this, it's really not a pleasant place to be. I'm not saying that this would happen, but it could, and it seem's you need all the help you can get right now to help you back on track.
You will be ok, I promise you, you'll make it, but you need to be patient. I was never patient at first, I found it so hard, I just wanted to wake up feeling well the next day, with a new career, new life etc,... it doesn't happen like this. It has taken me 2yrs so far. I had been ill for about 15yrs (2yrs ago it came to a head) and i'd still say I'm in recovery progress. With finding the right combination of med's and in time, you too will get there.
I feel that 'Time' really is the strongest healer.
Be kind to yourself, you're special, especially to your little one's that love you very much, they don't want to see you feeling hurt anymore.
Sending lots of love xx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Hi Happyone,
I am so proud of you. Most of us won't admitt that we need help, much less ask for it. You are being so brave here hun. Hang in there , they will work out something for you.
No hospitals aren't nice places, but if it means that you can get the help you need, focus in on that thought hun.
Remember you aren't alone.
Take care and God Bless will have you in our prayers.
Therapist has just been in touch. I have just to see my cpn as planned tomorrow. I don't want to have to wait until tomorrow. Not another day of this absolute F hell and having to interact with the people around me. I can't stand this depression much longer and not feeling safe with my thoughts. Every day is such a struggle, really and truelly.
I think they have obviously decided 'no' to hospital as the therapist had spoken to the duty doctor and the crises team and I am not going today so I think they think I am not a danger. I feel more of a danger to myself than I have ever and I am trying to be so sensible by telling them.
I don't know what to do next. I feel so bad and see no way out of this hell.
Happyone
Hi Happyone,
Have you tried calling your cpn, yourself today? Maybe if they hear from you they will do something hun. I am not sure how the hospitals work over there, but here, if you feel that you are a treat to yourself or somebody else you can go to the ER, and they will admitt you from there. Not sure if thats possible for you.
I would call my gp first. As for getting through the day, can you go into your bedroom an stay. I don't know if you have children, if so is there somebody you can call to take them for the day.
Take Carexxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Tina
Oh that's just typical !! I feel so annoyed by this.
The same thing pretty much happened to me at first, I then tried to battle on alone, but felt I couldn't no longer, ending up doing something stupid. Obviously survived, carried on battling until I literally had to SHOUT and SCREAM, and I was doing this to help my children save their mum. Otherwise I would have found a real way out.
I literally had to beg them to go into hospital, and it was a good job too, because as already said not long afterwards I became delusional, I didn't even know who I was !! They then Sectioned me !
You also need to do the same, to be heard,.. 'Shout' out as much as you can, they can't leave you feeling like this.
I'd do as the other's say to go to A&E, if nothing's heard there then demand for an emergency appointment at the Day Hospital where your Mental Health Team are, ask to speak to any Psychiatrist as you need urgent help now.
Don't give up Happyone, and don't let them treat you as though you are not in need.
Paddington
03-01-08, 14:11
oh Happyone..i am so sorry i have been so behind wirth your thread hun..off line for two weks with the flu..i am so sorry you are feeling this bad hun..i too have had those thoughts[recently in fact:ohmy: ] and it seems the only way to be freee of the emotional hell but it is not..i am not saying it goes away but we can make the choie to trudge on with things till they pick up again..and they will iam sure hun:hugs: i am here should you wantto talk at any time hun..also if you want to have stay in a safe environment like hospital..cant you self commit..just walk in and say help!You could years ago..maybe it has changed ..but maybe worth finding out about.Sendin you lots of love ,Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Oh I know your advice is all right but I just can't force myself out of this bit right now. Kate, I wish I could just shout and scream. I just feel so paralysed by the whole thing and all I can do is think about how I can end it but I have my daughter with me.
Happyone
Hun you just hang on in there. :hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Happyone, I really feel for you. Could you bombard anyone you have access to with calls - MHT, CPN etc and as a last result turn up at A&E. You shouldn't have to be this desperate. Do you have any meds to calm you down and get you through today until you see CPN tomorrow? Please don't do anything foolish because of the fact they're ignoring you needs.
:hugs:
I have phoned and left a message for the CPN but she isn't in at the moment. I need to ask her if there is a possibility that I will be admitted tomorrow to know if there is an end in sight or not.
Happyone
happyone,
i feel so sorry for you mate, you must be going through living hell.
we are all here for you mate......i wish i had the magic wand, that would heal you.
please, please remember that this depression wont last forever and you will get better...i promise.....be strong...and believe me that one day you will start to recover.
i am so worried about you, cause ive been where you are and i never thought i would get better, but i did recover and so will you.....x
i know this sounds like rabble, but please hold on in there.
take care
dawny x
That's understandable, with depression there are outspirts of anger and I guess I was lucky to have one that day, I expressed energy I never even thought I had, I guess I was feeling hysterical at the time.
As Paddington say's, afew girls did knock on the hospital door with their children. It worked for them. Could you try doing this ? Sometimes seeing people so vulnerable with their children gives them awake up call, they may just listen then.
honeybee3939
03-01-08, 14:27
Happy
Well done hun for phoning them back:hugs: :hugs: , like others have said dont just sit back "scream and shout" at them if you feel you need to.
Where all here for you hun, so hang on in there.
Thinking of you
:hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
bluebottle
03-01-08, 15:08
I hope you find some support HappyOne. Could you get an advocate to speak on your behalf?
Take care.
CPN phoned. She is speaking to her colleagues and getting back to me.
Happyone
xxx
Paddington
03-01-08, 15:15
good news my friend:hugs: :hugs: hope they give you the support you so need and deserve hun,xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Well done for taking the initiative - keep plugging away.
Hey hun, :hugs:
Sorry you are feeling so bad at the moment. I can only liken it with how I felt leading up to Christmas.
The only advice I can give is to say that 'ending it all' might not be the answer you're looking for. I'm not religious but I wonder what happens after we're gone, and no-one knows for sure. You might just be making a big mistake and spending eternity stuck as you are now. :sad:
If you think hospital is going to help then try to pressure for it. I think maybe you should go in for a bit and see if it helps. However, I don't think that's going to change how you feel, except you will be feeling it in an unfamiliar hospital bed away from your family.
Getting your meds sorted will help, but that's not a quick fix, it will take time. I think that the strength to get through this is within you. So whatever happens hun, you must keep going. For your little-uns if not for you.
I guarantee that if you do get through this, you will be looking back on it as a horrible time in your life but glad you are still here. :hugs:
Jim :hugs:
Jim hun
I need to go into hospital to keep my girls safe. I have been getting all out of hand and aggressive again, hitting my eldest over the weekend. I think that is what made them take me seriously by telling them I am a danger to others too.
I am damaging my girls by being here. I damage them by going. The only way I can see to do damage limitation is by getting better away from them. If I can't do that then I don't want to be here. I can't live with the knowledge that I am screwing them up for the rest of their lives.
I wish to hell she would phone back. I am like a tightly wound spring.
Happyone
Ok hun, well you need to do what you think is right. I'm not there with your family so I can't really tell you what is right or wrong.
One thing I would say from being a child with a parent with mental health problems is to talk to your family and let them know what is going on. It's probably a frightening time for them as much as it is for you. Is your hubby there and helping out?
We are all here for you hun and I'm just a call/txt away.:hugs:
Jim :hugs:
well,
she phoned back and the answer is 'no'. I have to take my calm me downs like sweeties and see what happens.
I can't believe this. I really thought she was going to see if she could get me in. I feel stuffed now.
happyone
hiya happyone.
oh my darling i want to give you a hug. it makes me so angry that the 'system' is constantly letting people down. the father of my youngest brother an sister fought depression for many years. he was in the same situation as you. he tried to get himself sectioned due to his suicidal thoughts but nothing was done because 'there weren't enough beds' and 'after an assessment they felt he wasnt in need of any treatment'. he then went on to successfully end his life.
the reason im telling you this is because my brother and sister are now left without a parent. they dont know the reason for his death but one day they will have to be told. 2 years on they still cry themselves to sleep some nights. they dont understand why daddy left. i know things are hard for you but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE try and stick in there. think of your children. the pain you feel now will be nothing compared to their pain if you follow those thoughts. i'm not presuming its easy and i dont understand how you're feeling but im hoping that keeping the thought of the children in your mind will give you the strength to stick in there.
i also have a friend of the family who sffered from depression for years, he has recently got better and its amazing to see the difference in him. you can get better. you can get better. you can get better. i know it propbably doesnt feel like it now but itas the truth. please just stick in there for your children.
there's an amazing book called 'mind over mood'. its an activity kind of book thats based on cognative behavioural therapy. its really amazing and may really help you. i got mine off ebay for a couple of quid. i know you prob dont have the energy to do sopmething like that but if you try and push yourself it may just help you.
lotsa love x x x
I know it's not what you wanted to hear but please hold out until you see her face to face tomorrow; do/take whatever you have to between now and then:hugs: . You will get there.
Happy :hugs:
You are not stuffed. You have to try your hardest to get through this.
Take your meds and try to calm down and get through tonight hun.
Is your hubby there? I think he needs to be if he's not.
Jim :hugs:
Hubby is not here. I am glad, I don't want him to be.
She phoned back again and I have to see duty shrink tomorrow with her. It won't make any difference.
I am so sorry about your bro and sisters dad honeybee. I am trying so hard to be taken seriously so I won't be stupid, but no one wants to listen. Not the people who matter anyway.
I will take meds and calm down hopefully.
Happyone
oh hun... if it thats bad do you have a friend to spend the evening with you?? prob not what you want but it'll keep your mind occupied??? :hugs:
I want to get on a train and be with you but I can't. Just take the meds to calm down and hopefully you'll get a result tomorrow. My thoughts are with you.
Lots of love
Jo xxx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Happyone,
So sorry that you are going through so much just to try to get help. I know the feeling tho, it was the same for me here in the states.
Remember that you are stronger than you think at the moment. Not sure if you believe in God, but he is there hun. Please try to calm down and remember that your kids love you sooooooooooooooooooo much!!!!!
Am praying for you to get through this night safely hun.
Remember you aren't alone, we are here for you.
Take Care xxxxxxxxxx
Tina
Sorry to hear this Happyone.
Your Psychiatrist will assess you tomorrow and I guess they will do what they feel is best for you there and then and will also look into your meds.
I know it's so hard, but try and have a bath to help you to relax too, can understand even this can be difficult,.. try and lie down and rest as much as you can. Have you got anybody that can help you look after your children, if your partner cannot take time off work?
If they are not going to take you into hospital, then surely your CPN appointments need to be made on a daily basis at least.
Thinking of you x
the health service is soooooo frustrating!
as far as i am aware you can still turn up at the mental health unit of any hospital and ask to be taken in - you will then be seen by the psychiatrist on duty who will decide whether you need admitting. i know you feel very very low but you still come accross as sane and rational lol - sometimes we worry ourselves sick with thoughts but they are just that - even if the temptation to carry them out feels really strong - we wouldn't. i agree with the post that recommends challenging your thoughts - i know its hard but if we have the energy to think negative thoughts then we can just as easily learn to think positive ones. start right now - and every negative thought - immediately replace it with a positive one. i know you will feel too exhasuted to do this but i feel that this is the one weapon against anxiety/depression that we have apart from meds. i did this religiously for 3 days and the upturn in my mood was AMAZING. its not an overnight cure and its easy to slip into bad habits again but it is the way forward.
Dear Happyone,
Hang in there hun. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
thanks.
I am just going to try to persuade them again tomorrow but I know it will be to no avail.
happyone
Can I be totally honest.
I feel that you should try and go to the Psychiatric Ward now or as soon as possible, either with or without your children. If you need to take them because you have nobody to look after them until your partner return's, you don't need to tell them details, not yet, just a simple explanation that you have a headache or something and need to see the doctor. Your children can play in the play room with an assisted nurse while you are seen by a Duty Psychiatrist or Senior Nurse. Tomorrow's too long for you to wait feeling like this Happyone, there maybe a chance for you. I know hospital's can be busy, but there maybe a spare bed, you just have to ask.
I wouldn't advise driving though, even if you feel like you can, as I feel this would go against your need's as they take everything into account. Order a taxi or a lift from somebody.
If they are still unable to take you in at least you were able to talk to a Nurse about your feelings right now. It's worth it Happyone, if worth a try. x
Happyone :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Ellen xxx
Kate,
thanks. I just don't have enough courage. CPN has already spoken to duty psych, so has therapist and they have just recommended me taking more of my anti psychotics. If I go to hospital, they will just get in touch with my duty team as it is in a different area and I can only take up one of their beds. A taxi won't come out my way tonight cos of the snow and a round trip would cost me £50 anyway that I don't have.
I can phone crises team but they can't do anything for me either except talk to me.
I feel like taking all my meds before I go in to see them tomorrow and say
'this is what I have done, this is how serious I am'
I know that is not rational and I know I am not supposed to say things like that on here ( I am sorry) but it might make them realise I can't see myself making out the weekend if I have to do this one day more.
happyone
Happy,
I am so sorry to hear how things are :weep: I have sent you a pm but had to post here too. Sorry I am not there for you as much as normal right now but I am quite ill myself right now so not online much, plus still trying to have a bit of a break from NMP for my own sake.
Please find the courage to get any help from anywhere, even if it does mean going to A&E until tomorrow when you get assessed. At the very least please tell hubby how bad you feel and make sure you are not alone at all at any time.
I don't have £50 spare either but I would go overdrawn and send it it you if it meant you got into a taxi and got help and it saved your life.
You will come out the other side of this, you can't see that now maybe but you will mate, just please please do not do anything you may regret, it is never the answer. Please do not take all your pills either.
As someone who grew up without a Mum believe me it's not nice for the kids left behind. My Mum had no choice about her death but you do mate. I don't say that to make you feel bad but say it in the hope you realise your girls do need you - YOU are their Mum and whether you are sick or not they need their Mum.
I hope your meds calm you down mate.
Sorry if I am not able to be here as much as usual but I am thinking of you lots :hugs:
Hang in there mate.
Lisa x
Please hold on happyone x
honeybee3939
03-01-08, 19:05
Happy
I have heard you talk of your mum (or was it your mum-in-law)in your previous posts, could you not give her a phone call? does she live near by? maybe she could give you a helping hand hun with the children.
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
My mum has little un overnight and is taking big un tomorrow while I go to docs. I am eventually chilling down, meds are calming me and I am not going anywhere tonight except my bed.
I will just wait for tomorrows appt to see what it brings.
Lisa, don't be sorry for anything hunny. I realise how hard I must be to answer to or get involved with, I don't envy you, I would hate being involved with me.
Happyone
honeybee3939
03-01-08, 19:31
Happy
Glad to hear the meds are helping you calm down, you go have yourself a good nights rest and sleep, im pleased also to hear mum is helping with the children.
Good luck with your appointment tommo hun:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Southern_Belle
03-01-08, 19:57
Hi HappyOne,
I can't tell you how sorry I am to see that you are going through such a difficult time. Sorry I haven't written sooner but I have been away for the New Year.
I am glad your calming meds are helping and that you feel somewhat better. As I don't really understand your healthcare system I can't give much advice on what to do. I can tell you that you deserve all the excellent healthcare that is available and if you feel you need to be hospitalized then you should be. I would talk to your husband and mother and perhaps with their aid you can be hospitalized. I hope your appointment helps with your decision tomorrow, I will keep my fingers crossed for you. You are worth so much more than you think you are.
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers and I do believe you will get through this, please keep saying the same thing to yourself.
Love and hugs,
Laura
wishing you all the best,i remember feeling so desperate before i went into hospital,i went to my doctors surgery and begged them to get me into hospital,i was on the floor begging and the next day i was in.I was there for 9 weeks and it gave me the break i needed,its so very very scary feeling as bad as you do.I know u won't give into your thoughts because you are telling us on here,i had those thoughts too,its the illness not you,keep telling yourself that.If you feel you need the saftey of the hospital then you keep telling them and they WILL listen.
Ali
Lisa, don't be sorry for anything hunny. I realise how hard I must be to answer to or get involved with, I don't envy you, I would hate being involved with me.
Happyone
I don't hate being involved with you, you're a lovely person and a wonderful friend, so don't go being sorry for anything :hugs: The reason I am not here much has nothing at all to do with you, or anyone else here specifically. I am just physically ill myself right now and not physically or mentally able to be much help to others right now or take too much onboard or even spend much time online and I am admitting that for the first time ever which is hard.
I certainly don't hate being involved with you or think you are hard to answer mate. I really hope you don't think I meant that as I do not at all.
I do worry about you yes but that is different and because I care about you :hugs:
Anyway I am glad you feel a bit calmer now and I am thinking of you lots.
I hope tomorrows appt goes well :hugs:
Lisa x
groovygranny
03-01-08, 23:07
Happyone,
I can't offer any advice as I would be so completely out of my depth - but I can send you loads of love and hugs.....wishing they could be for real.
It doesn't matter how well or not we know anyone on here - if someone is desperate and in need of support then we can all just do what we can do. But it's also evident you have many very good friends here who do know you well.
Good luck for tomorrow, and flippin' humungous http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z162/ptsjoel225/Hugs/hugs-1.jpgfor you.
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
:flowers:
hope you are ok happy one....
....thinking of you and wishing you well again
love dawny xxxxxx
thanks,
I have my appt in two hours time but I know it is not going to make a slight bit of difference. They are just going to keep on telling me to pop anti psychotics to calm me down.
Happyone
Good Luck,
Thinking Of You and http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g296/edge06/comment/hugs-07.gif
Take It Easy and Take Care hun.
Love & Wishes,:hugs:
Pip's X X X X
Hun, :hugs:
I think if you are going to get in, you need to explain to them exactly why you want to go and how it will help. I'm trying to think about it from their point of view. They will look at how high the risk is to yourself and others and things need to be very high. The NHS is pretty sucky unfortunately for mental health. Beds are at a premium in hospitals, especially at this time of year.
The trouble I see is that I can't see any real reason how going in is going to help hun. They can't stop you from walking out if you really wanted to hurt yourself, so going in for that reason isn't really good enough. Realistically if someone really wants to do something there isn't much anyone can do to stop them unless they are in a high security or private hospital. :meh:
The trouble is hun, is that people who have been in before tend to rely on hospital as a safety blanket to take away all responsibility from themselves. I fear that they are worried this is why you want to go in.
I think you would be much better off at home with much more support to help you out when you are alone.
I also think you should be looking at a big change of meds, perhaps going back on an AD. The risk is there that it will trigger a worse change in your mood tho. The meds you are on now are not working well enough. You need to be telling them that you want a change and need to be closely monitored.
Talk to them how you feel that your family is suffering and they can't care for you. Your hubby is away from home a lot and you are left on your own with the kids and you are worried about that.
Whatever happens good luck and know that we, and especially me are here for you hun.
:bighug1:
Jim :hugs:
I am on an anti d jim. I have had it increased.
It is going to help me by keeping me safe from harm while any med change they do works. I can't manage at home and hubby doesn't understand he doesn't see what there is to manage. To even put an item of clothing on a clothes horse is a major ordeal. I can't manage being a mother any more with all the thoughts that I have. I don't see any way out. I am sorry, but there it is.
happyone
You're probably gone now but wanted to wish you all the best. There is a way out of this - if you're still around why don't you print out this thread just to show them how desperate things are. Let us know how you get on.
:hugs:
I have written a big lot about how desperate I feel to show them. I think they have made up their minds though.
happyone
Hi Happyone,
Good luck with your appointment today, I really do hope they will listen to your needs.
I totally agree with you that going into hospital right now is the very best thing, having been in the same situation myself.
These med's aren't working for you therefore they must take you in while you are feeling this way and find the right ones for you in your stay, until you become well. I can't really see any other option. Reducing medication, and changing medication feeling the way you do is very dangerous, they must take you in care. You will be monitored at all times. Once in their care, you're their responsibility.
I understand that feeling of no energy at all, even making a cup of tea is difficult, everything is so, so hard. I'm so sorry you're feeling this way.
I really do hope you receive the help you need for both yourself and your children.
Good luck Happyone xx
Happyone has just txt'd me to let me know that she is going in now. She hasn't got enough time to let everyone know.
I'll try to keep in contact with her and see how she's doing.
Jim :hugs:
Thanks Jim :hugs: I have just logged on to see how Happy got on so thanks alot for the update.
If you do get to contact her please tell her I am thinking of her if possible, as I'm sure everyone else here will be too.
Happyone - I know you probably won't read this for a while but I am thinking of you and wishing you well. I hope being in hospital helps mate and that they can sort out your meds and get you back on track and feeling well again. I think you are so brave and I am so proud of you for how you have dealt with this and asked for help :hugs:
Lisa x
Likewise from me Jim. If you are in contact give her lots of hugs from me. I hope it all works out for her but by the sound of things it is what she needs.
Message for Happyone.
It makes me feel so sad knowing how much pain you are going through right now, but also happy knowing you are in the right care.
Give yourself all the time you need, don't push yourself, you have the chance to take those positive baby steps forward securely and safely. Be kind to yourself. You may not believe it now, but you WILL get better Happyone. I promise you.
You will believe just how 'Special' you are, not only by your children, family and friends but also within yourself. Time is a healer Happyone, just take things easy.
Sending love xx
jimbo,
please can you let her know that my thoughts are with her.
dawny
Dear Happyone, please don't do anything silly, you will be looked after by you cpn and crisis team. Just try to think of your family and stay strong for them, look after yourself:flowers:
Thinking of you:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Lesleyb
Thinking of you happyone. I wish you all good things x:hugs:
Southern_Belle
04-01-08, 15:39
Jimbo, Please let HappyOne know that I too am thinking about her. I also think she is in the best place for her now until they get her medication problems worked out. I do believe all of this is caused by a chemical imbalance and can only be fixed by meds which are also chemicals. It is only natural that supervision should be maintained when they do not work. Huge hugs HappyOne, you can do this.
Lots of love and hugs,
Laura
Thinking of you Happyone:hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Sending you my thoughts and good wishes and hope that they are of help to you. All the best.x:hugs:
honeybee3939
04-01-08, 16:44
Happyone
Im thinking of you too hun:hugs: :hugs: i hope you get the proper help you need now as you deserve it .:hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
I had a txt a little while earlier to say that she's arrived and is feeling very anxious and wondering if she's made the right decision.
I've sent her all your hugs and told her that she's doing the right thing.
I'll start a hugs thread for her in a sec.
Jim :hugs:
Thinking of you Happyone :hugs::hugs::hugs:
Kate x
thinking of you happy one
Paddington
05-01-08, 10:53
thanks Jimbo for the update:hugs: you are such a remarkable fella,and just what happy one need at the moment as you understand her plight so well...i will go on to the hugs thread in a mo..mean while here is a big hug for you too:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: Love Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thanks Paddy, :hugs:
A quick update,
I've passed on all your hugs. Happy didn't sleep too well last night and is wanting to go home already. They have told her that if she does leave they will take steps to section her. She's finding time is dragging but there are books available and hubby can bring stuff in for her. She sees the doc on Monday to review things.
I'm hoping she does spend at least a couple of weeks to get things sorted out properly.
Jim:hugs:
Massive big hugs from me! :hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
She sends her love to everyone this morning.
She says they have been monitoring her over the weekend and she hopes to come home soon.
Jim:hugs:
Managed to catch up a little last night by text.
Continued big hugs. :hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Still thinking of you Happy:hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
nomorepanic
06-01-08, 18:18
Please pass on my well wishes and hugs to Happyone as well :hugs: :hugs:
thinking of you Happyone,
love anx xx
Happy will be coming home today, so hopefully she will pop on later to post.
Jim :hugs:
I am home. Thank you all for the support, it was lovely.
I am ok, but very shaky. A combination of meds, lack of sleep and just how big the past weekend has seemed.
Hubby is clearing a path through the snow and then I hope to lie down for a bit.
Home team are supposed to be coming out to mnoitor me tonight and through the week.
As much as I believed I was in danger, hospital was NOT the place for me. In future crises times I will take the support of the home team.
Thank you again for support, everyone.
Happyone
xxx
Just popped on to see if there was any news and I see you are home, that's great :yesyes:
I really hope you are starting to feel better and maybe on meds that will help you more now too. It's good you have the home team supporting you aswell.
I think you were very brave to go into hospital mate and ask for help, proud of you :hugs:
Take care and thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
take care happyone.....
....hope you are on the road to recovery now....xxxxxx
love dawn
Welcome back happyone. Hope things settle down for you soon.
Did they play around with your meds?
Wow - That was quick !
It's so good that you have been given the choice, as hospital is an extremely dull and horrible place to be in. You must be feeling much better to take note of your surroundings and to care :) . I'm glad you are feeling more positive.
Good luck Happyone x
Hi,
my meds have been played about with a bit in as much I am pretty pumped full of anti psychotics which double up as an anti anxiety/ anti racing thoughts etc. This does not have to be a permanent arrangement and I believe I am to be seeing my shrink on Thurs to see where we go next.
It is fine but I am so so tired with these meds. Can't have it all though eh?
Katie, I certainly did notice the surroundings, they were awful! Maybe that was something in my favour as the nurse on over the weekend had me believing there was so little chance of me getting out but when I spoke to the doc today about how awful I thought the place was, she said 'that's good':shrug:
Happyone
xx
Glad you are back Happy:hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
I am glad you are back hun.:hugs:
I think the important thing is to try to get these meds sorted out when you see your doc. I forget what you are taking at the moment, but it's important to remember how you felt before you went in and try to prevent that from happening again.
Hope you settle back in to home and I expect the little ones are glad to have you back. :hugs: Make sure your hubby takes care of you and try to involve him as much as you can. It's important he gets to understand what's going on too.
Hope you enjoy your own bed tonight. :sleep:
Jim :hugs:
Hope you enjoy your own bed tonight. :sleep:
I am going at 7pm! LOL! I have had three nights of bad sleep. I ned to catch up!
Happyone
xx
:hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
:hugs: You are one brave lady Happyone :hugs:
Take as much support from Mental Health Team and anybody else that offers as you need, you are one hell of a fighter, and I'm sure that 2008 is going to be a good year for you.
miss motown
07-01-08, 22:58
hi happy one your thread caught my eye as not so long back i was going thru the same thing i also felt there was no way out and i was trying so hard to hold on to my insanity i went from 11stone down to just 7 stone in a matter of months and the thought of just ending it all give me realif i didnt want to end my life as i had 4young children but the life i was living in my own night mare was hell i never in a million years would of belived i would ever come thru it but i did and i can honestly say you will do it takes time just try and grasp at reality and keep your mind busy i no its hard hun but you will get better my thoughts are with you as i no wot your going thru take care x
Southern_Belle
09-01-08, 03:09
Hi HappyOne,
I'm so glad you are home and back with your family. I agree it was a good sign you did not like the hospital or the way it looked. If you were truly in a really bad way you would not have cared what kind of place you were in or how it looked! Not to say ignore the symptoms if it ever comes up again but it just shows (to me) you still cared about your surroundings.
I do hope you get the needed rest and wake up and have a wonderful day. Welcome back, you were missed...
Love,
Laura
Welcome back Happy hun :hugs: oh and if you have any trouble sleeping I will come sing Danny Boy to you :yesyes: xxxx
happyone
hope you are getting better and stonger everyday....xxxxxx
love dawny x
So how you feeling hun?
Was bed at home as good as expected? :sleep:
Hope things are going ok for you,
Jim :hugs:
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