Deluded
07-01-08, 07:25
I have the worst case of panic disorder, pure o(mental ocd), depression and depersonalization derealization.
I had so much panic attacks, I no longer have the ability to feel panic or anything else. Nervous system shut down.
I have so bad mental obsessive thoughts I have never a normal thought anymore, their so psychotic, its insane.
Examples: IS THIS A DREAM? AM I GOD? DO OTHERS EXIST? these 3 have been running 24/7 in my head the last 2 years CONSTANT.
I'm so depressed I want to die(but i don't feel depressed so when I cry, eventhough I haven't shed a tear in about 9months, it's no release of emotions).
the depersonalization desentized me so bad I can cut myself and not feel it NOT EVEN PHYSICALLY, I CAN SHOWER ICECOLD WATER, NOT FEEL IT.
The derealization who acused my psychotic thinking is so bad I see everything like I was on LSD or worse.
I recieved a severe concussion when I was ranning through the hallway, jumped over my cat and crushed my head in the doorway.
Didn't go unconscious but was f**ked up for days or weeks(dont have sense of time anymore, dont even know what month or year it is).
after this was the first time i coudnt achieve a erection.
I can get a erection(80% hard), but NO arousal, give me 1000 naked supermodels ready to do anything I wish and I wont get horny.
WTF IS WRONG WITH ME? IM 18.
this new years eve I just wanted to forget it all, got drunk as f**k, high as f**k, ate a lot of pills, drove around drunk(yea i dont give a f if a die), was at this party, 2 of us crashed(i didnt even notice, im so bad) had sex with this girl, I got hard (80% like) but didnt feel the sexual arousal AT f**kING ALL and why don't I get 100% hard?!
Did my concussion cause brain damage and I will never have a normal sexual life again?
PLEASE answer me, I'm dying
2 years ago, at this very time, I was a normal teenager,dad died, smoked too much weed, got a panic attack and ALL THIS is the result WTF!?
This post has been automatically edited by the NMP post filter
I had so much panic attacks, I no longer have the ability to feel panic or anything else. Nervous system shut down.
I have so bad mental obsessive thoughts I have never a normal thought anymore, their so psychotic, its insane.
Examples: IS THIS A DREAM? AM I GOD? DO OTHERS EXIST? these 3 have been running 24/7 in my head the last 2 years CONSTANT.
I'm so depressed I want to die(but i don't feel depressed so when I cry, eventhough I haven't shed a tear in about 9months, it's no release of emotions).
the depersonalization desentized me so bad I can cut myself and not feel it NOT EVEN PHYSICALLY, I CAN SHOWER ICECOLD WATER, NOT FEEL IT.
The derealization who acused my psychotic thinking is so bad I see everything like I was on LSD or worse.
I recieved a severe concussion when I was ranning through the hallway, jumped over my cat and crushed my head in the doorway.
Didn't go unconscious but was f**ked up for days or weeks(dont have sense of time anymore, dont even know what month or year it is).
after this was the first time i coudnt achieve a erection.
I can get a erection(80% hard), but NO arousal, give me 1000 naked supermodels ready to do anything I wish and I wont get horny.
WTF IS WRONG WITH ME? IM 18.
this new years eve I just wanted to forget it all, got drunk as f**k, high as f**k, ate a lot of pills, drove around drunk(yea i dont give a f if a die), was at this party, 2 of us crashed(i didnt even notice, im so bad) had sex with this girl, I got hard (80% like) but didnt feel the sexual arousal AT f**kING ALL and why don't I get 100% hard?!
Did my concussion cause brain damage and I will never have a normal sexual life again?
PLEASE answer me, I'm dying
2 years ago, at this very time, I was a normal teenager,dad died, smoked too much weed, got a panic attack and ALL THIS is the result WTF!?
This post has been automatically edited by the NMP post filter