View Full Version : Can anyone help me please - desperate today!
I am having more good days than bad now but I am classing a good day as a day without a full attack. I have realised today though that daily my life is filled with those anxiety feelings and I am spending all my time supressing them.
Take yesterday, dropped Millie to school and had a PA at the gates, made it back to the car, got home and calmed down. Did some yoga and was able to pick her up from school right as rain. Lovely evening, only woke once with a thumping heart but calmed down and was back asleep in minutes.
Today dropped her to school no problems at all, went to the local shops, OK in the chemist but a full on attack cam on in the supermarket, I had not even picked anything up yet. Again got back to the car, managed to calm it down and got home. Now I am full of anxiety, breathing feels tight, shoulders are aching, dry mouth and lumpy throat etc.
I am already thinking about calling my hubby to pick Millie up from school (an hour round trip for him[V]). Going to try some yoga for half an hour to see if I an turn it around but ANY additional thoughs appreciated.
I am so scared that this is it now - my life from here on in, full of panic. I cannot even bear the thought of going to the local shops on my own - three months ago I was speaking at a conference about women in business in London's Docklands and today I am stuck at home[Sigh...]
Hi Angie
Sorry to hear how you've been feeling but the rest of your life won't be like this - you are improving and although it's a gradual process you're moving forward.. We all have 'blips' and the odd relapse.. there's no magic bullet for the condition but it's something which responds over time.. You're already much better, it's hard to recognise that on a bad day but gradually you will notice how few bad days come along and you'll come out of it..
Don't give in and don't feel like you'll be stuck like this forever because you won't.. keep doing whatever you do that helps (yoga, maybe Rescue Remedy too, that always helps me and cut-down/out on caffeine, that helps me too) and keep in the back of your mind that you are getting better.. it doesn't happen overnight but it does come in time and you're already along the road to it..
Remember we're all here to help/support you and hang on in there.. it's just a blip..
Good luck and good health
J
Hey angieb -
Sorry you're having a bad day. :(
I know it feels right now that you want your hubby to pick up Mille, but the more you keep your usual routine, the better things are (at least for me).
Just remember that this is something that can be conquered; it will NOT be your life from here on. Are you getting therapy at this point?
I don't know what causes our bodies and minds to have a good day one day then a bad day the next. All I know is that there is some underlying reason and until you face the problem, it will turn up again like a bad penny.
I went for YEARS with no panic or anxiety and now.. bam..
The only thing I can attribute it to is stress that I am not dealing with well.
Just tell yourself that you can get over this. You can pick up Millie from school. You can go shopping if you want to. If you start to have a PA in the store, then you can just leave if you need to.
I'm here to chat if you need to..
Clive Edwards
09-03-05, 13:34
i know it seems difficult now but you will go to conferences again. tell your self positive things like this will not beat me, i'm stronger today than i was yesterday i did it before so I WILL DO IT AGAIN. and keep it going as while your thinking positive you are not thinking negative. Also try playing your favorite foot stomping CD at high volume and dance yourself dizzy for the full track length 3 - 4 minutes. your breathlessness will then be down to mass expended pent up energy i,ve done it,made me feel good. go on give it a go and let me know how you get on.
all the best Clive:)
Thanks guys [:I] I feel just such a loser!!!!
I actually witnessed myself bring on and then turn off my attack when out today so I really do believe that it is all my doing - JUST HOW DO I SWITCH THE BX!Xdy thing off??????
I am not getting any help at the moment (apart from the good people here). Sitting in the doctors waiting room brings on an attack. My doctor just chatted through me hyperventilating and crying and prescibed beta blockers. I could only take them for three days as they made me feel 10 times worse, I ended up in casualty[:O]
I would love some verbal help, when I talk to people it automatically feels better. My lovely hubby is great and listens but does not have any answers for me. I think my doctor said that they could refer me to a councelor but the wait is about 6 weeks for an initial session and it is 23 miles away!!!!
This is just so sad:(
Angie
I summary today had actually been a really good day for you -a light bulb day as you clicked and proved to yourself
' I actually witnessed myself bring on and then turn off my attack when out today so I really do believe that it is all my doing '
It is hard and its not easy overnight but once you really recognise and accept that it is your thoughts that start you off, then you can start to get back control and progress...
Thoughts : Lets try to keep our thoughts in perspective (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=283)
More thoughts : Mind Games (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1789)
Read these again keeping todays sequence of events in mind .. see what you get from them.
Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance
Hi angie, you are doing so well, don't let this minor blip put you off picking millie up from school as you know yourself that you can control the attacks. I feel like I shouldn't be saying this to you as I let my panic attacks stop me from taking my kids to school amongst other things and feel like I missed out on so much with them for example going to to christmas concerts, taking them to parties, theme parks etc and feel like I could have done alot more if only I had been strong like you seem to be. I think you are doing a brilliant job at dealing with these attacks and wish I had your strength and determination. You are lucky to have such an understanding hubby as my boyfriend is the total opposite and thinks I am just a weak person. Hang on in there and keep your chin up. There is no easy way out with this horrible illness but if you are determined you will succeed.
Take care
Love Lisaxxx
Clive Edwards
09-03-05, 14:24
You are not a loser thats negative. If you can hold an audience at a conference you are a winner. so start believing in yourself again. you can do anything. before panicking you were a self motivating go getter thats what business people are. you still are but you've just switched it off temporarily. switch it back on and go to the school the shops the doctors.
Clive:)
You lot - got me blubbing now with your generosity!!!!!!!
I will go and get Millie, and try to focus positively. Thanks for just being here.
Lisarose - you are so right, my cup runneth over with the good things that I have in life. We have three holidays booked this year and I am already dreading them - HOW selfish is that when there are people that would give their high teeth for a break!
Gonna have a strict word with myself this afternoon[:I]
I am amazed at how generous you all are[^]
hi glad to hear you got yourself picked up again from when you posted, it is only temporary and will improve as your more able to control the bad feelings now,it does take time and although i feel myself i am better i still have to fight the anxious feelings that are constantly bubbling underneath hang in there and you will get on top again im sure
fan x
Hi Angie,do hope the school run was better for you this afternoon.
As one who has been there too I know it feels like it will go on forever
but it does get better as you learn more ways to handle panic.
Just remember it can't hurt you ,I used to be so scared I would faint but once I accepted it ,it lost its power. Not easy thing to do but you get the knack of it after a while.
take care
love kiz xx[:X]
Well...i'm back
It was not as bad as I expected, I certainly could not say it was comfortable but once again I did survive.
Just latched on to any old mum that passed by and nattered about the weather etc to take my mind of things.
Thank you also Fan and Kiz. You know the funny thing is I don't really fear the dying part anymore or think that I am ill, I just fear the fear now. I still struggle to believe that I am actually causing this - and that currently I don't have the solution. I have been through so much in life, and have tackled any problems head on - by the throat - nothing or nobody phased me then bam just liek that I am a pathetic quivering wreck [:o)]
The support here is awesome - thank you all - let's see what tomorrow brings shall we.
Take care...Angie
Glad to hear you went ahead and did the school run.
This is a victory for you today!!!!
Hi angie, well done for picking up Millie, I knew you would get through it, just have more faith in yourself and you will get there in the end. You are doing really well!! Don't give up the fight.
Take care
Love Lisa
Well done Angie for picking Millie up from school. This was always a nightmare for me when my daughter was younger, my then hubby worked a couple of hrs away, I tried not to call him but did so on a few occassions. I would stand with the other mums and I used to physically shake, I never made friends with any of them, cos it was all I could do to stand there, let alone try and make conversation. When my ex and i split up he worked abroad for a while so then, no matter how bad I felt, I never had a choice. This helped me for years, I had to do it. Now she is 17 and at college, I dont have to drop her off or pick her up anymore, but I actually wish I did, I can do most things if I have to, if my daughter or my cats were ill, I have to take them to the Drs or the Vets, yet I cant force myself to do things just because I want to, ie visit the hairdressers or go into town shopping.
Just to add, I dont know if this would work for you, but twice now, when seeing my Dr for help, I have written a letter and taken it with me. Explaining everything, exactly how bad I feel, how my life is affected etc. That way I find that the Dr takes 1 min to read the letter and the rest of the consultation can be spent exploring ways to help. I found in the past id spend 8-9 mins blubbing and not making sense and coming out feeling worse than when I went in and the Dr was never aware of how acute my symptoms were.
June x
long term panic/anxiety sufferer, add agroaphobia to that, fed up
Thank you for being here for me today everyone - Lisa you are very tuned in how people feel and are very giving in yourself.
I hope that you are doing OK, I know that you have been having it tough too recently (much tougher than me for sure!). If ever you fancy a chat email me on angie@fishingit.com, i'd love to see if I can help you in anyway.
Thank you all so much, I am feeling much better this evening, and am looking forward to doing battle at the school gates again in the morning [}:)]
June - so sorry we were posting at the same time...doh!
The doctor thing is brilliant, cannot believe I had not thought of that.
Thank you so much for taking teh time to write[^]
Take care all and have a good night...Angie
Hi Angie
Well done for going back out to pick Millie up, you could have easily asked her dad to pick her up you chose to face it head on and you did it. I hope that has given you some of the confidence back you deserve.
Hope tomorrow taking Millie to school goes really well.
Well done.
Lots of Love Sal xxxxx
nomorepanic
09-03-05, 19:47
Angie
Glad you feel much better this evening.
You did so well with the school run so well done you.
Hope it goes ok tomorrow.
Nicola
Hi ange
Sorry i wasn't here for you yesterday and i hope you are feeling better today. For what it's worth i think your a brilliant, strong woman and you should give yourself a pat on the back
Rach xx
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.