Quite embarssed posting this(need your help)

[James08]

Hi 4 Months ago I was really stupid and ended up taking eckies and cocaine..I ended up in hospital with heart palpations

I know alot of you wont have sympanthy for me and probably don't think I deserve your help and your right it was the biggest mistake of my life..am 20 years of age and since then my life has been quite bad,I have panic attacks quite alot..think am going to die and think I'll have a heart attack,Also feel like struggling to breath occasionally and get muscle spazams and vomitting

4 Months I've tried to get this out of my head but I cant even play football now without being sick,anybody got any suggestions how I can fight this?

[cardmaker]

Hi James.

I can't give you any advice about your health as I don't suffer with the same things as you. Someone here will no doubt be in a similar postion and will give you some advise.

I think you'll be proved wrong that people think you don't deserve their help. They're a great bunch on here and they know how bad things can get.

At least you know that you made a mistake and are man enough to admit it.

Good luck for the future I sincerely hope you succeed.

:hugs:

[lesleyB]

Hi James, yes you have made a mistake, but lots of us have done things we regret I know I have so don't beat yourself up about it. Have you been to the docs? A course of councelling may help you to get things in perspectiv and move on. There are some great posts on here that can help you too, also look at the first steps and self help guides. Make a start today!
Good luck and hope you feel better soon.:hugs:
Lesleyb

[Bunty]

Hi James

We all make mistakes and it took a lot of courage to write what you've written. we won't judge you! Please go to your doctor and ask for help. Read up on panic attacks - the most important thing is to keep doing as much as you can. The more you stop doing the harder it is to start them again. Maybe your friends could just have a kick around in the park instead of actually playing football with you? build yourself up from there?

Let us know how it goes.
Bx

[Kim Baker]

Hi! James:emot-wave:

I have a Son called James and he 21 today!

Don't be so hard on yourself Hunny, we all make mistakes and none of us are perfect.:lac:

You will find this site a great source of comfort and very supportive:)

Please go and see your GP - he will be able to help you.....

Take care,

Love,
Kim X:hugs:

[bottleblond]

Hi James,

Please don't beat yourself up over this, you know it was a mistake and one i can't see you repeating so please leave that thought in the past where it belongs.

I would suggest that you visit your GP and just tell him the same as you have told us. I'm sure they will be very sympathetic and offer you all the help you need.

In the mean time, don't bottle it up, talk about it as much as you need to. This is a great site and i'm sure you will find alot of people to chat to.

Take care

Lisa
xxx

[sheba2]

Hi James, Please don't fret about your mistake and what others might think. We all act daft sometimes and although we have to live with the consequences there are a lot worse things that you could have done. First if this was just a one off then I imagine all your feelings are anxiety related. If you have dabbled with drugs for a while then you may be having a reaction to them. But you will get through this. There is loads of help out there. If you can, get hold of the number for the young persons drug and alcohol abuse group. They will be able to give you loads of info on what is happening to yu. They also offer counselling and can put you in touch with lots of other help if you need or want it. I would also see your gp as they will be able to put your mind at rest much better than anyone else they deal with much worse drug problems than yours and I doubt whether they will judge you they will probably be glad that you have learnt your lesson. Although I have no personal experience of the type of drugs you have taken My daugter and some family friends have like you tried it and really frightened themselves. They are all fine now. Good luck let us know how you get on.

[MikesP]

James, experimenting with drugs doesnt make you a bad person. Most people try something at some point in their life and it only takes feeling succeptable to it for a slight moment for it to take place in the first place. It takes a lot more than a slight moment like that for a person to be judged, there is so much more, good and bad to account yourself for than that. Even tho it sounds like you might only have tried those the once, you'll learn that there is so much more to life than the decision you made on that day.

The panic symptoms may have started up as a knock-on effect from the trauma of that bad experience. Like a few have already said, its good to talk about it - try to get as much off of your chest as you can so that you may feel like you are ridding yourself of those memories and feelings. You know what they say about a problem shared. Councelling could help you out very much for that purpose, it wouldnt be anything major, just a place to let off some steam about that situation and how you feel at the moment - it could help turn your problems around and get you feeling good again. I would look into that as soon as poss, you can sort that out through your GP - are you okay with going there?

[James08]

Hi thanks for the help guys

I dont really fancy councilling because am a bit shy with people I dont know,and i wont touch drugs again

just sometimes I get small muscle spazams(which is a sign of anxiety i hope)
sometimes struggle to sleep because the fear of dying!

I've met my GP she gave me quite a hard time for being silly with them on a night out with friends,

[aliciajane]

That's awful of your GP to treat you like that.
They're there to help you not to judge you!
You've obviously admitted it wasn't a good thing, the important thing now is to learn from that experience and move on :)
I've replied in your other thread to discuss this more,

Best wishes

xax

[sheba2]

Hi James

Some gps are worse than useless. Mine considers agoraphobia as a luxury illness that people wouldn't suffer from if they had to walk 2 miles just to get water. Survival would overcome the fear. He's probably right but that isn't much help to me. Anyway you are probably stll experiencing anxiety from the fear of what might have happened but it is most unlikely that your spasms etc are due in any physical way to what you took.

By the way counsellors are there to help you and its there job to be kind and considerate to your needs. If you went through your gp you would probably have to wait ages. If you can afford it I would go privately you may only need to go once or twice to put your mind at ease. Money well spent.

[Ma Larkin]

Hi James,

I did something pretty stupid too a couple of years ago. I took an overdose and the symptoms you describe are exactly the same as what I had. The panic attacks and palpitations I thought were death itself. I was throwing up out of sheer fright and although the sickness did subside, it took me a long time to get over the panic attacks and the idea of dying. Every time I had a panic attack I really thought I was having a heart attack. It was the worst thing I have ever experienced. The best thing I ever did was to stop worrying about my heart but I had to re-train my brain to stop the thoughts. I still have ectopic beats now, but I don't let them get the better of me and like a counsellor once said to me "if you were having a heart attack or if there was something wrong with your heart, you'd be dead by now!" Harsh words, but very true I suppose.

I won't say I'm 100% better yet. Still have highs and lows, but the panic attacks seem to have stopped (I always hate saying that in case I am tempting fate!)

Hope you feel better soon and I'm sure you will get lots of good advice from people on the site.

Take care.

Les