View Full Version : how do you fight it?
Hi 4 Months ago I was really stupid and ended up taking eckies and cocaine..I ended up in hospital with heart palpations
I know alot of you wont have sympanthy for me and probably don't think I deserve your help and your right it was the biggest mistake of my life..am 20 years of age and since then my life has been quite bad,I have panic attacks quite alot..think am going to die and think I'll have a heart attack,Also feel like struggling to breath occasionally and get muscle spazams and vomitting
4 Months I've tried to get this out of my head but I cant even play football now without being sick,anybody got any suggestions how I can fight this?
Hi James,
Welcome to the Forum!!
:hugs: :yesyes: :hugs: :yesyes: :hugs: :yesyes:
You are not the first and sadly will not be the last person to experiment with drugs.
What can you learn from this?
You can learn to take your life in a much more positive direction.
Have you been to see your doctor for a good check-up.If not,talk through your issues with him/her so that you can formulate a definite treatment plan.Meds can help.CBT can help.Self-help books are plentiful.You will get loads of support and advice here,too.
Go through the Main menu and educate yourself about why these things are happening and learn how to deal with them.
Your post is incredibly honest and brave.That will stand you in good stead through your recovery.
Best wishes,
Chalky
Hello james hun,
Ohh please don't be to hard on yourself, we all make mistakes in life, its what we learn from them that count. I know that NOOO one on hear will judge you, you know yourself it was a mistake, so Please, please, DON'T believe that you don't deserve any help, YOU DO, just like all sufferers do. If you keep up with this type of thinking it will feed your anxiety and panic, so, be kind to yourself, use alot of positve self talk, the past is the past, you can't change that. I feel you have learned from it, so please don't beat yourself up about it, what is more important now, is how to move on, sometimes its not forgiveness of other people that counts the most, its to forgive yourself, remember, everyone makes mistakes.
You know, you could have come on hear and said nothing, this would not have helped your recovery, it IS possible to recover, with alot of help and support, but you told the truth and I think this goes along way and says what type of person you are, so please, don't beat yourself about whats in the past.
So, to start, I would say, have you forgiven yourself for what you did in the past, if not, this will hinder your recovery, you must learn how to forgive and not put to much importance on your mistake, can you do this?
Have you spoken to your gp about getting some help, eg counciling? You know whats triggered your first panic, I feel that if you know whats triggered your first pa, is to deal with that while learning about panic, anxiey and all its symptoms. The first pa was a warning to stop the drugs but the ones after that are YOU fearing the next, its a round about, thats dame hard to get off, but not impossible.
Hun, its not a matter of fighting the panic, its for now, to exccept it, to say, well I'm like this FOR NOW, just for now, its ok, I WILL get better and see yourself better in the future, DON'T see youself like this for the rest of yourlife.
My daughter symptoms were the same as yours, muscle spazem and vomitting, she is doing well now.
What I will say is, I know this is dame hard, but please, if you can, don't let it stop you from doing the things you have always done, mmm easyer said than done I know, but keep doing if you can, no matter how you feel, your mind has been programmed very quickly to notice any changed in your body and you see this as the onset of panic, therefor, panic.
There is a saying on here, JFDI, (just fu*king do it, feel the fear and do it anyway. If you can do this, this shows Mr P your NOT giving in to his fears. Panic, needs our fears to survive, use alot of distraction, when you feel panic coming, there are lots of threads on here.
Remember where the panic is coming from, YOU, who knows you better than anyone, youself, your fueling your fears with your negative thoughts. I know when in full blown panic, its dame hard NOT to fear it, but if you distract yourself and take the fear away, the panic, high anxiety will stop. Learn all you can about anxiety and symtoms, know that anxiety, does not always lead to panic, this helps us move on a little.
So, remember, for now, don't fight it, eccept it, own it, its yours, its NOT coming from playing football or any outside sorce, you, youself our fueling your fears, with your negative thinking.
Play, what I call mind games, if you feel your having a heart attack, this is Mrs anxiety talking, tell yourself its NOT, my muscles are tight because I feel a little anx right now, mmm sounds easy but I know dame well its not, changing the way we think takes along time and practice, practice practice, try to take away all negative thoughts and replace them with more positve reasuring ones.
I have not had a pa in along time, becasue of this great site and all info and great threads on here, I wish I could put down in one thread how I better, or write a book and give it away for free, but I can't, I still have alot to learn, but more about myself and how to keep my anxiety at a lower level, doing well at the mo, ohh but its dame hard work. I still have to keep a check on my negative thinking. Still working on my confidance, I am changing a habbit of a liftime here so I know its going to take time.
Not sure if I've been of any help at all, but I am sure that just knowing that you CAN stop panic, HELPS.
YOU TAKE CARE
BE KIND TO YOUSELF
LOVE JILLXX
Yea i've been to the hospital and doctors
they say it is anxiety,it doesn't feel like it though because sometimes I get spazam pains in my chest?I dont know if these are a regular occurance
every night I wish i didn't be so silly or stupid but I have and I have to learn from my mistake!
Hello james hun,
Ohh please don't be to hard on yourself, we all make mistakes in life, its what we learn from them that count. I know that NOOO one on hear will judge you, you know yourself it was a mistake, so Please, please, DON'T believe that you don't deserve any help, YOU DO, just like all sufferers do. If you keep up with this type of thinking it will feed your anxiety and panic, so, be kind to yourself, use alot of positve self talk, the past is the past, you can't change that. I feel you have learned from it, so please don't beat yourself up about it, what is more important now, is how to move on, sometimes its not forgiveness of other people that counts the most, its to forgive yourself, remember, everyone makes mistakes.
You know, you could have come on hear and said nothing, this would not have helped your recovery, it IS possible to recover, with alot of help and support, but you told the truth and I think this goes along way and says what type of person you are, so please, don't beat yourself about whats in the past.
So, to start, I would say, have you forgiven yourself for what you did in the past, if not, this will hinder your recovery, you must learn how to forgive and not put to much importance on your mistake, can you do this?
Have you spoken to your gp about getting some help, eg counciling? You know whats triggered your first panic, I feel that if you know whats triggered your first pa, is to deal with that while learning about panic, anxiey and all its symptoms. The first pa was a warning to stop the drugs but the ones after that are YOU fearing the next, its a round about, thats dame hard to get off, but not impossible.
Hun, its not a matter of fighting the panic, its for now, to exccept it, to say, well I'm like this FOR NOW, just for now, its ok, I WILL get better and see yourself better in the future, DON'T see youself like this for the rest of yourlife.
My daughter symptoms were the same as yours, muscle spazem and vomitting, she is doing well now.
What I will say is, I know this is dame hard, but please, if you can, don't let it stop you from doing the things you have always done, mmm easyer said than done I know, but keep doing if you can, no matter how you feel, your mind has been programmed very quickly to notice any changed in your body and you see this as the onset of panic, therefor, panic.
There is a saying on here, JFDI, (just fu*king do it, feel the fear and do it anyway. If you can do this, this shows Mr P your NOT giving in to his fears. Panic, needs our fears to survive, use alot of distraction, when you feel panic coming, there are lots of threads on here.
Remember where the panic is coming from, YOU, who knows you better than anyone, youself, your fueling your fears with your negative thoughts. I know when in full blown panic, its dame hard NOT to fear it, but if you distract yourself and take the fear away, the panic, high anxiety will stop. Learn all you can about anxiety and symtoms, know that anxiety, does not always lead to panic, this helps us move on a little.
So, remember, for now, don't fight it, eccept it, own it, its yours, its NOT coming from playing football or any outside sorce, you, youself our fueling your fears, with your negative thinking.
Play, what I call mind games, if you feel your having a heart attack, this is Mrs anxiety talking, tell yourself its NOT, my muscles are tight because I feel a little anx right now, mmm sounds easy but I know dame well its not, changing the way we think takes along time and practice, practice practice, try to take away all negative thoughts and replace them with more positve reasuring ones.
I have not had a pa in along time, becasue of this great site and all info and great threads on here, I wish I could put down in one thread how I better, or write a book and give it away for free, but I can't, I still have alot to learn, but more about myself and how to keep my anxiety at a lower level, doing well at the mo, ohh but its dame hard work. I still have to keep a check on my negative thinking. Still working on my confidance, I am changing a habbit of a liftime here so I know its going to take time.
Not sure if I've been of any help at all, but I am sure that just knowing that you CAN stop panic, HELPS.
YOU TAKE CARE
BE KIND TO YOUSELF
LOVE JILLXX
That's a great reply thanks
Yeah I'm still beating myself up about the drugs..I think its because i've brought this on myself by being foolish by taking them..I hate them now!But my friends take them & quite often when I hear about them..it reminds me what a idiot i've been!
My Mum suggested councilling but she also said nobody can win this battle apart from me!I wouldn't want to see a counciller but if it would help me then I'd give it a go
I think negative quite alot these days and because i had 2 weeks in hospital am scared of going back and scared of dying..but phyiscally the hospital said im fine..but that just doesn't seem to convince me!
What is the best way to think,when you feel one coming on?is there any well known methods to prevent it!
Hi James,
At least now, you know for defo, what you are dealing with, it IS anxiety, so you can start to learn from here, read all you can, read through the site, post as often as you need to, talk about it as much as you can, don't bottle things up, keep venting, keep posting, it does help.
You say, you get spazem pains in your chest, anxiety has many, many symptoms, this symptom IS one of them, it may be caused by acid, or the musculs in the chest tighting due to tenstion, do you have any relaxation cd's. Learn how to breath right, there is info on the sight for learning how to breath.
You say, every night I wish I didn't be soo silly or stupid, hun, please change your negative thinking, this is sooo important.
Its good to hear you have had checks hun, this helps us move on a lttle.
You take care
LOVE JILLXXX
Thanks Gill,glad to hear about your daughter to!
How long does the battle usually take to overcome this?does it depend on the person
this also may sound silly,but even though I know I have the symptoms..I also think what if it isn't anxiety which am sure wont help me at all
thanks alot
James
Hi James,
Sorry hun, we must have been posting at the same time, LOL
As I have said, panic feeds on our fears, soo if you can and I know that this can be dame hard, try thinking of ANYTHING, that makes you happy, anything that has more positive thinking in it. One time in a shop, I could not think of a thing, my mind was sooo negative, so I jumped up and down, mm I know this sounds sooo silly, but as I did it, my thoughts went to the men looking on the cam and I could hear them say, look at that plonker, I did find this funny, but hay, it stoped the panic.
Boarding a plane, the only thing I could think of at the time because my levels of anxiety hit the roof in seconds and I did not feel it coming so the only thing I could think of was to sing in my head, off I went, 99 bottles of bear on the wall 99 bottles of bear, take one down, pass it around, 98 bottle of bear on the wall so on and so on, I know that this again may sound silly, but distraction form the fear, takes the edge of panic, therefor brings it to a lower level of anxiety and when your at lower level, you can put more positive thinking in, do you know what I mean? There are lots of threads on coping skills here, if you can;t find them, let me know and I will go in search for you.
James, Your not going to die, this is Mrs anxiety talking up to her old tricks again, DON'T listen to her, you tell her your suffering pa's, anxiety, and NOBODY has died of that, so tell her to shut up.
What I found helped was to talk to someone about my pa's. axniaty, I am lucky, I had my mum and sis, they never said much, but just listened to me, I would talk alot about this site and the symptoms of panic, anxiety, this helped programme my mind that is WAS, panic, anxiety I was dealing with and nothing else. Do you have anyone who would just listen to you woffle, ohh I did woffle alot but ohh boy, it did help me move on a little.
Remember, keep in your mind it is possible to get better, if you feel that councilling will help and it does, go for it, or look into CBT I have read books on this and it IS good, it helps change your negative thoughts.
It is true, that YOU have to do all the hard work, but hun, sometimes help is what we need, sometime we can't do it alone, we all need someone or something to help us on the way, so look into councilling or cbt, get some books from the library on cbt.
YOU TAKE CARE
BE KIND TO YOUSELF
LOVE JILLXX
Oppss, posting at the same time again LOL
**How long does the battle usually take to overcome this?does it depend on the person**
This is a question, I cannot answer, how long is a peice of string,
What you are saying does not sound silly at all, you will find that panic, anxiety sufferes have alot of what if's, hun, you have to change your what if,s, you are right, this will not help at all, you will only feed your anxiety with the what if's.
The thing is James, IT IS, panic, anxiety, you have been told this, you have to try dame hard to believe, thats why I say, read all you can, about pa,s anxiety, you have to reprogramme your mind. You have to know and learn, just how powerfull your mind is and what is can do to your body, what I used to think, it got me into this mess, so it can get me out of it too. AND IT DID
YOU TAKE CARE
LOVE JILLXXX
Thanks again Gill I will keep in touch and stuff,This site is a great idea and with posters like yourself helping me it actually means alot..Before this i've never thought about my health or imangied anything like this
Until you experiance it,you dont realise how hard it is I suppose
the thing what usually triggers is it off,is spazams or wee pains near my heart..should i just tell myself its because of the muscle tension?
Lilith1980
23-02-08, 10:01
Hey James
I dont have much to add after what others have said but we all make mistakes, and we learn from them. That's what life is all about so dont beat yourself up ok?
Take care
Jo xxxxx
Hi James,
How are you feeling today?
There is a saying, to fully understand something or someone elses problem, you have to go through it, hun, everyone on here understands what you are going through.
Am I right is saying, your trigger for panic, is spazams or wee pains near your heart, this sends fear of you haveing a heart attack. hence, PANIC.
Hun, read all you can on the symptoms page on chest pains. Know and understand that your heart is at its strongest whan panicing, YOU are at your strongest when in panic, I remember repeating over and over again when in panic, I AM FINE, ITS JUST PANIC, I AM AT MY STRONGEST,
When you get your chest pain, you have positive thoughts to recall on, you know you have been told by gp and the hospital, that its anxiety, recall on this thought, tell yourself your fine, its just anxiety, it will pass soon, recall on how you would have thought before all this happend, you would not have called it a heart attack or even give this a thought, you would have just thought, mmm trapped wind, pulled muscul or something little like that, your fears of a heart attack are fueling it.
Panic, is the flight, fight response kicking in, all humans are made this way and have this response in them when they feel they are in danger, are bodys are at there strongest when is this mode, we can run faster, hear better, see, better so on and so on. For NOW, JUST FOR NOW, your mind is stuck on this mode, you have to show yourself that there is NO, danger, there is nothing to be scared off, ohh easyer said than done, I know, but keep trying to push the positive more reasuring thoughts in hun.
You take care
LOVE JILLXX
hi james
just to add to what others have said in that you don;t fight anxiety - you accept it - its the only way through. once you can reassure yourself that all the horrible symptoms are simply adrenalin - you just try to carry on with your day and not to them too much attention and they will start to fade. every time you have a worried thought about how you feel - bang! - more adrenalin and more of the symptoms.
i read a really good book about how a man overcame anxiety this way - his started after taking drugs too - i think its called anxietynomore - he has a website so if you type that into your browser - his story should be able to help you. x
hi,
i just want to say that i think my GAD has come on in part from drug use and partly genetic.....(mum suffered worse then me)
ive been in a bad state since i quit about 2 years ago now. you will find others on here in the same boat. i still havent forgiven myself for being so stupid either, but i do see it as very important to do so....
im very proud of you that you have realised at such a young age!! it sadly took me a while longer...
everyone has given you great advice, so id just say, keep trying to be positive when you have it in you to do so. also take advantage of the 'good' days....it will help the bad days to be more bearable...and if not, then jump on here, you wont be judged and you will be able to chat with us...who are all in a similar boat to some degree or other...
take care and breath deep....
Beautiful heartfelt words of encouragement Jill. You are a very special lady. We are blessed to have you here.
Love and Hugs
Sarajane
xxxxx
Hi Sarajane,
Thank you sooo much for your kind words, you will NEVER know how much those words mean to me, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
BIG HUGS TO YOU
LOVE JILLXX
Hi James,
How are you today hun, it does help lots to vent on here, so please keep posting keep venting. As you can see, you get lots of help and support from this great bunch of people, ohh there fab.
You are NOT alone,
You take care
LOVE JILLXXX
Hi yeah am ok,sometimes a have bad moments and sometimes am fine
last week for example I had a good week,just told ymself its anxiety and I was rarely sick
this week,not so much
I was drinking alchool last night with my friends and feel quite bad the day after
The biggest problem is sleep,because you just have crazy thoughts because of it!
aliciajane
25-02-08, 02:05
Hi James,
You seem to be getting some great support from people here, your words of encouragement are esecially wonderful Jill :)
I just wanted to say please don't feel bad about taking the drugs, like has been said, we all make mistakes in life.
The way I always look at it, if your learn from your mistakes then you can start looking at it in more of a positive light.
I too have taken drugs which I'm not proud of, but now I know what to steer clear of, I've found where my morals lie, and I'm happy I've found that because of it.
When I start to feel bad about the things I've done I just tell myself this,
"It's okay. This has happened, and it's in the past now. You've learnt from it, and moved on which is the important thing. Your a better and stronger person because of it!"
I'm sorry to hear about the panics and anxiety you are going through, they're so tough, but you'll get better.
I've gotten a lot better, as have many people on this site (the section on Success Stories discusses these) and with the right help I guarentee you can too.
I know it's so hard, but try and stay positive.
Well done on telling yourself it's the anxiety. When you really accept it, it makes it so much easier to deal with it. The symptoms tend to back off, and it becomes a lot easier to see things in a rational light.
Alcohol, as far as I'm aware, isn't very good for anxiety. Remember that it is a depressant, and so is never good if your not in the best state of mind.
I was drinking a few weeks ago, and like you, felt really bad after.
I can't tell you to not drink, but sometimes cutting things like alcohol out of your diet can be really beneficial for anxeity/pa sufferers.
I've cut out caffiene and am cutting down on sugar for mine, very hard but I think it's worth it! :)
You mentioned about sleep, again I can relate to this. I take it your referring to insomnia?
When I started having my panics, I didn't sleep for nearly 2 weeks.
This just mutliplied everything that was making me feel bad by a million.
You try to sleep, but you can't because of the anxiety. You get more anxious then because you can't sleep and you know that not sleeping will make you more anxious and so on and so on. It's a viscious circle :(
I started feeling better as soon as I started sleeping. Trust me, after a while you will sleep. Your body will make you!
The things I do to help myself sleep are having a long bubble bath, drinking a hot drink (I have Clipper Organic Sleep Easy herbal tea! Things like horlicks and hot chocolate are good too), I read a nice light-hearted relaxing book in bed, then switch off the light.
If i'm not asleep within an hour or so, or start feeling anxious or nervous, then I'll read again until I want to try sleeping again.
The key is to not panic about not being able to sleep.
Tell yourself it's okay, breathe deeply and if you can't sleep then just do something you enjoy instead :)
I hope this has been of some help James,
Best wishes
xax
Thanks alot,the replies are great
These help reassure me and make you know that me thinking am going to die just now wont happen thankfully(touch wood)
you guys have been great!
Hi James, One thing I use when I cant sleep is to actually concentrate on my breathing.
In your head count (not out-loud) as you let the breaths out and count as you breath in. While you are concentrating on doing this your mind can not think of anything else. If you do start thinking of other things, just bring yourself back to the silent counting and keep yourself focused on your breathing. It does take a while to master this, you didn't learn how to use a computer in one day, so keep at it, after a few nights it will become easier and before you know it, the sun will be coming up and you wouldn't have even realised you had fallen asleep.
Good luck
SJ
Hi James,
Its great to hear that all the replies are reassuring you.
Remember, you are on the road to recover, you can see it, smell it and touch it, this is a phase you your life you are going through right now, NOTICE, going through, YOU WILL come out the other side. Please, try and keep positive, keep working on those positive thoughts.
From what I have read, going out drinking with friends having a good time, ohh boy, YOUR DOING GREAT, WELL DONE, I know the morning after was not to good, but hay, it takes me 5 days to go over drinking, me thinks its my age LOL
You take care
Quick update guys..got test results today..my liver and heart and everything else is fine!
start a new job tomorrow..sometimes being a bit nervous makes me sick..but thats just natruel I suppose?
so been a good day,this site has helped!hopefully the anxiety will ease off a bit!
Hi James.
Ohh lots of good news I see, from the test results.
You are starting a new job tomorrow, thats great new James, hay, anyone would feel nervouse starting a new job, YOU be kind to yourself, I am soooo happy for you.
Its really great to haar this site has helped.
Thank you for letting use know how things are, please can you let use know how your job goes.
GOOD LUCK IN YOUR NEW JOB.
TAKE CARE
LOVE JILLXX
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