I'm having trouble with a bridge.

[jollywalrus]

Hi Everyone,

I haven't posted for a long time because I have been working hard trying to conquer my fears. I can now manage the shops (with a trolley) and try to get out every day, even if it's just for a walk. But I am having HUGE problems with a footbridge over a railway line that I have to cross four times a day, to get my daughter to school. It has never bothered me before and when I am with someone I am fine. But crossing it by myself now pushes me into stage 10 panic and I can't work out what to do about it. It only takes 16 seconds to get across that bridge, but this morning I actually stopped on one side and nearly turned back. Hesitation as you all know is not good!

I know somenone will give me a lightbulb moment for this problem!

Thanks,
Christine

[FAN]

hi hope your ok i too am fine when im with someone and can do almost anything thats probably because im distracted look into ways of distracting yourself as you head to the bridge even if its only humming or talking to yourself i have one corner that i really cant walk round for some reason i actually cross the road then cross back when im past it which is silly but cant get to grips with it

fan x

[lainey]

Hi Christine

You could have turned back, but hey, you didn't so well done for that,you will get over this but the worst thing you could do is to stop using the bridge, which you are not.
You are facing your fears and that is good.
Well done you

Take care

Elaine x

[rachel25]

Hi Christine

I always try singing a song in my head, this happens to me when i am driving on a straight road (freak!) but it sometimes works for me or thinking about a solution to a problem. Help it helps

Rach xx

[tracyp584]

Hey!

I always try calling someone from my mobile. Or even texting someone can distract me when i am walking. It's funny how you say the bridge wasn't a problem before, has anything happened to make it a problem? I have the same thing where a certain area is causing me problems, but few months ago it was fine. I have no idea where this worry came from, just from thinking too much negatively perhaps? Easier said than done i know!!!

Take care

tracy x x

[vernon]

Hi jolly, I am the same with foot bridges I hate them so much. I can cross the brick or stone types but not the Like tin type. I have always been afraid of them there is one near us crossing the by-pass and what I did was not use it walk miles round instead, I didnt know what I know now at the time and I realy done the wrong thing avoiding. You done realy realy well crossing the day you was going to go back, Well done I wished I had done that now but got so dizzy and paniced I didnt. When I did have to go the Kids where playing and messing on it lol. It takes about 4 mins to cross and I used to cross in 30 seconds lol then run down the other side. Try a walkman? or as others say try singing or doing a pazzle in your head. good luck . Vernon

[jollywalrus]

Thank you all for your support. I really don't know what has set me off with this bridge. It is very high and made of stone and I think I am quite tense walking on my own anyway. I'm gonna try a walkman tomorrow.

Love Christine

[seh1980]

hi Christine,

Nic has trouble with a bridge as well ( I hope you don't mind me saying Nic!!). Hers is a car bridge, not a footbridge but I'm sure that it's pretty much the same thing. We all have problems with certain places and a bridge is just another place, isn't it? Maybe Nic will give you some feedback..She has posted about it before so you will be able to find her post.

Sarah :D

[Meg]

Hey Christine ,

Great to hear you're doing well.

You need to tackle this just as you did that ' path' - remember !!

Go to it and stop a few steps on to it and wait for it to subside , next time go a bit further. Distraction and JFDI is key at first to get you across followed by self dialogue built on previous achievements.

Let us know how you do . We will be rooting for you ..


Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance

[nomorepanic]

Christine.

I don't like bridges much either. I find it hard to drive over them but I am sure it would be similar if I was walking over it.

Is it the height that you don't like or just the fact that you aren't on solid ground once you get on it?

I think my fear is that you can't just turn off and you have to go over it.

Distraction is the key and it will get better the more you do it. The walkman is a good idea and sing along to it as that will help with the breathing too.

Seh - of course I don't mind you mentioning it.

Nicola

[jollywalrus]

Hi Meg,

You know you reminded me about the path that I also walk down several times a day and I don't even notice it now! It is almost as if I can't let myself be free of panic, there has to be something that niggles. After all, if it goes completely it might come back when I'm not ready for it and how would I cope?! See how I think? It really is all in my mind!!

I tackled the bridge again today although I cheated a bit because I tagged on behind someone else which made me feel a bit safer. I certainly don't like the height, but I think the bridge worries me in the same way that I can't walk across and open field. There is nothing to protect me and I just get panicky and dizzy. Give me a huge housing estate any day and I can walk for miles!

Thanks again everyone,

Christine

[sal]

Hi Christine

Well done for facing it and getting over the bridge. You know you can do it and we are all here to support you through it.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.

[angieb]

Hi Christine

I have a problem with the path through the church which I have to walk to get my daughter to and from school. I hate it and for NO REASON AT ALL!!!!!

I have built this up into such a monster that for days I would not sleep knowing I had to face it in the morning and would not relax after midday knowing I had to go back in the evening.

It is getting slightly easier but I do still have to psyche myself up to cope with it in the mornings. I found telling just about everyone that I was having these feelings and that really helped. Have you spoken to some of the other mums, you may find that taking away the fear of having an attack and embarrasing yourself helps. It did for me and now I am getting lots of support. They look out for me and distract me and if ever I am struggling (mild PA) on eof them normally comes to my aid.

The other thing I find is that if I can think of an excuse not to do it at all I would so now I am just saying to myself " 100% regardless of how I am feeling I will be doing the school run - so get on with lady"

Also seems to be helping;)

Good luck and let me know if you come up with any techniques that make it easier.

Angie

[Meg]

Angie - good for you !! A bit of JFDI does wonders sometimes ..

Christine - come on .. its exactly like that path to beat this one - shall I find your old posts and show you how terrified of it you were once !
Tagging is not cheating - its doing it anyway with a touch of involuantary support from the tagged .. no worries

Oh and ** After all, if it goes completely it might come back when I'm not ready for it and how would I cope?!** Just fine - maybe catch you unawares but you would remember how to cope quickly.


Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance

[jollywalrus]

Hi All,

I was doing so well with this bridge thing. Cheating a bit by sort of waiting until someone else crossed it, but was getting quite confident.

Yesterday someone got mugged on the bridge in broad daylight. Mmmm, now I want to go on the bridge without people. Went totally over the top this morning looking at people and trying to decide if they looked like muggers or not!!

I guess it's one step forward, one step back.........as usual!!

Love Christine

[nomorepanic]

Christine

That is a shame as that will knock your confidence.

Perhaps it was someone telling you that you had to do it alone after all lol!

I hope you will be ok - follow someone from behind and keep a bit of distance.

Sorry for this setback but I hope you continue to cross it.

Nicola

[sal]

Hi Christine

That wont have been easy for you to contend with and will have knocked you back a bit, but you know you have the strength to carry on doing it.

Keep trying hon and like you say one step forward and one back but another step forward will come.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.