how am i gona get through this

[lane12]

i dont no if this is the right board to post on but need some advise i suffer with anx /panic attacks /dep it all started in january of this year ,my oh is having open heart surgury somtime this year and am very worried i carnt stop thinking about the what ifs and having negative thoughts witch in turn starts of a anx attack we due to see surgion on tuesday and getting worked up over it already how am i going to get through this to be strong enough to be brave for him tahnk you for letting me ramble on

[Emira7]

Hey Bullseye

Good for you for coming on here and sharing your feelings. It must be hard when you are trying to be so brave for hubby, yet all you feel is panic within yourself.

He is having a big operation thats a fact, I would say try not to focus on the what ifs, stay positive if you can. And when you see the surgeon make sure both ask him all the questions so that you can go forward positively.

I am not sure i have been of a great help, but keep talking to us on here if you feel the anxiety/panic, it helps just to talk sometimes. talk through the feelings.
When the panic comes breath through it, reason with yourself and let it go over you.

You are always going to feel some anxiety as he yours husband and its a worry.


Ultimatly the people who operate will be hugely talented individuals who have trained for many years, especially in the field of cardiothoracics.

Hugs to you + positive vibes.

[cattttt]

First, I will say that yes, these operations are serious, but they are also routine, they do them all the time. The docs, nurses and all the others who will look after him know what they are doing and have done it hundreds of times.
It's very hard for you I know, the only advice I can give you is to try not to think about it........easier said than done. But try this.....have something ready that you can do, say, sing or whatever, so that every time it comes into your mind, you can push it right back out again with whatever you have ready. I've been having a problem recently with a particular fear that comes up just as I'm waking up in the morning. Inside my head, so no one else can hear I shout "GO AWAY", I have to do this several times and then get up and start doing things to keep myself busy and it goes away after a while.
Hope this helps.

[sheba2]

Feeling for you at this worrying time. Is there anyone in the family who can support yu during this time. I've been going through a worrying time with my oldest daughter and in order for me to be there for her I had a whole back up of people looking after me. Good luck to yu and your hubby I hope it all goes well.

[minihaha]

hi bullseye, sorry to hear of your worry and i hope that your oh op is a success and wish him a speedy recovery. As the others have said, the surgeons and medic team are highly skilled and the chances of anything going wrong will be minimal. You say you are seeing the surgeon this week - perhaps you could use that appt to gain some reassurance and support ? my advice would be to tell your oh that you are worried (i know you prob dont want to do this as you dont want to alarm them but hunni supporting others thru illness can be worse than dealing with it personally) and agree with your oh a list of questions you will ask the surgeon. If your oh is not in agreement with this then you could always phone the hosp and enquire if there are any support groups or counselling offered to relatives?

Keep us posted on how it goes xxxxxxxxxxxxx