Running out of things to say?

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hi Everyone

What do you do when you are talking to your friend when you run out of things to say?


I made a new friend online, but I think I am running out of things to say, I dont want to bore him to death.

I find this kind of things really hard, as I am really shy and everthing, and dont know really what to talk about.

Please can I have your views experiences, etc.

Many Thanks

[marie1974]

hiya and welcome , well in my opinion just be yourself you should not have to make huge efforts for anyone and friends should like you for you. just talk about general stuff tv music hobbies families friends weather work study etc and it will just carry on from there. but dont worry you will be fine:hugs:
xx donna

[kiwistace]

I agree with Donna, and if I find myself a bit 'stuck' for conversation, i steer it towards the person Im talking to. Ask them questions about their likes, dislikes etc, not only are you getting to know this person as you want to, you make them feel like you are interested in them (which you are) and it also may provoke tangent conversations without you even realising.

I think the key is, is that its not all up to you, it takes two to talk and if you are friends or becoming that way, simple things like what you did that day, or an incident can turn itself into a bigger conversation. Dont focus on what you will say next, just go with the flow.

Hope I made sense :)

Stacey xx

[CONS]

Agree with the last 2 comments.

Ask questions about the other person.

Cons

[doodah]

I agree with everyone else too! My daughter was painfully shy up until a few years ago so I pointed out to her that a lot of people love nothing more than talking about themselves! If you can work out what people's interests are you could ask a few leading questions and then sit back and let them do the talking! I guess it's harder though if they're shy too, but well worth a go!

Don't give up though!

Wendy xxxx

[CaptainHaddock]

d

[Franz]

I think the key is, is that its not all up to you, it takes two to talk and if you are friends or becoming that way, simple things like what you did that day, or an incident can turn itself into a bigger conversation. Dont focus on what you will say next, just go with the flow.


Sometimes something that would be boring to a stranger or an acquaintance is interesting to a friend. Sometimes the mere fact that you're talking rubbish makes the other person feel comfortable to talk rubbish as well. Talking rubbish is a fundamental bonding experience. Most conversations that aren't about rubbish are about work, and what's more boring than that?

Also, sometimes a comment like "I'm bored" or "I can't think of anything interesting to say" can get a conversation going.

[pompey]

Hi and welcome

I think that we sometimes worry ourselves into not being able to say anything.

I am also very shy and i find it a lot easier to talk if i am in a group of ppl. Being able to sit back and just talk now and then is good.

You say that this in a new friend that you have found so first of all you should try not to worry about the silent moments, after all you are only just getting to know each other.

Try explaining to them that you may have quiet moments now and then, as a friend they will understand, maybe they are also finding it hard to keep the conversation going.

I do understand your worry about the conversation going quiet, i also have a friend online who i have been talking to for a while and at times it does go quiet, you will get through this i promise.

Just be yourself im sure you have so many interesting things to talk about, take your time and everything will fall into place.

I am sorry this hasnt been too much help in answering your question but i know how you feel and i know you will do fine.
pompeyx

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hi Everyone

Many Thanks for all of your replies, regarding my internet friend, well everything was going ok at first, he was online everynight etc texting all of the time.

Then all of a sudden just recently things have slowed down a lot, he hasnt been online and hasnt really text much this past week or so:sad::sad: .He used to text me at least once a day but, no no texts. Also I seem to do all of the talking(well typing, lol) , I think I might have bored him to death or something :weep::weep:, or it might be my anxiety kicking in, I don't know. My partner wasnt really happy about the idea, of talking to another man online anyway.

Sorry I just moaning on a bit now, if might be just me, you know.

Nevermind, better go now.

SHYGIRLAJB

[misterbean]

Hello ShygirlAJB

Personally, I would like to hear exactly what you said in your original post, though I would understand if you thought that to be way too risky.

Sometimes my brain gets so overburdened with 'what shall I say to make myself seem less shy/stupid/dull...' (I'll stop there, the list is a long one) that I completely forget that being as open as I can be is not as boring to others as I think that it is.

You might find that starting there gives unexpected results.

Martin