bluesparkle
27-03-05, 11:42
i really need some advice... wasnt sure whether to write or not as im not sure if its all my fault...
i have ocd/anxiety etc...
my ex left in november (only been with him 14 months)we had quite a few bad months after that as we live so close i wanted to stay friends...well we sorted that and now see each other most days... if i dont hear from him i get anxiety/panic attacks...but when i do see him sometimes that doesnt help either as he keeps telling me about his plans for the future and also anouther lady friend he has and the pain i sometimes feel when he leaves is awful.
i do alot for him ... washing... helping out with his taxi business etc and i enjoy it.
i really made a fool of myself last week as i told him how i felt and that i would eventually like to be back together with him...he held me and we talked but he said no promises but also he did give me some hope except i read what he had said wrong because nothing has changed... he even has me on his phone as "andy" when i asked him why he just went red and got cross...guess thats for when he is with his other friend...but i dont know.
i know im being stupid about this and i have not had this problem before when i have been single...but i cant or dont want to deal with the pain of saying good-bye and giving up any chance of being together...
i also feel i cant cope without the contact...
am i just being stupid.. its just im finding this on top of everything else we have to deal with when we are suffering attack really hard.
i dont know if all this pain is worth it...dont get me wrong we do have good times and a laugh(meant to be going on his bike tomorrow)so i dont know weather to stick it out or not...
thank you so much for letting me waffle on
rach
i have ocd/anxiety etc...
my ex left in november (only been with him 14 months)we had quite a few bad months after that as we live so close i wanted to stay friends...well we sorted that and now see each other most days... if i dont hear from him i get anxiety/panic attacks...but when i do see him sometimes that doesnt help either as he keeps telling me about his plans for the future and also anouther lady friend he has and the pain i sometimes feel when he leaves is awful.
i do alot for him ... washing... helping out with his taxi business etc and i enjoy it.
i really made a fool of myself last week as i told him how i felt and that i would eventually like to be back together with him...he held me and we talked but he said no promises but also he did give me some hope except i read what he had said wrong because nothing has changed... he even has me on his phone as "andy" when i asked him why he just went red and got cross...guess thats for when he is with his other friend...but i dont know.
i know im being stupid about this and i have not had this problem before when i have been single...but i cant or dont want to deal with the pain of saying good-bye and giving up any chance of being together...
i also feel i cant cope without the contact...
am i just being stupid.. its just im finding this on top of everything else we have to deal with when we are suffering attack really hard.
i dont know if all this pain is worth it...dont get me wrong we do have good times and a laugh(meant to be going on his bike tomorrow)so i dont know weather to stick it out or not...
thank you so much for letting me waffle on
rach