mlazar
19-04-08, 01:27
Hi everyone,
New to the forums, but I've perused for awhile and love how helpful everyone is. Had some worrisome problems lately, was just looking for some helpful advice. Let me give you a brief rundown.
Fall 2006, I contracted mono. Didn't really have a tough go of it, but for no apparent reason in April 2007, I became a raging hypochondriac (nighttime bloating led me to be convinced I had stomach cancer, which was just ridiculous). By June of that year I was JUST starting to kick the tendency when my father was diagnosed with a stage IV glioblastoma in his brain, essentially shattering the lives of a lot of people I love. Cancer suddenly became a very real thing. Cards couldn't have fallen more perfectly to incite the hypochondria again.
Massive, constant anxiety and stress ever since.
In November I had somethign tantamount to a nervous breakdown at the end of one of the busiest weeks of my life: I was extremely fatigued, apathetic, and my brain was "twitching" (don't know how else to describe it, except that it felt like there were muscle spasms/electrical shocks rocketing through my brain ever 20 seconds). Got over that.
That was just some background, if it helps. Onto the current problem:
For all of March, had a weird "pressure/tension/full feeling/annoyance" primarily in my left ear (80/20 split, left and right). Then it became exclusively the left. Doc took a look, said she could see some fluid. Perscribed "Simply Saline," just a salt water spray. Used it for a couple weeks, and the pressure (while still flaring up occasionally) seems to be, for the most part better.
Then, two weeks ago tonight, was running my hand through my hair and found a small, hard lump on the back of my head. Obviously, a freak out ensued. It's fairly small, probably not even the size of the end of my finger, and it doesn't FEEL like it's gotten any bigger. Maybe a bit smaller. But then I'll feel it and I'll think "no, it's the same size."
So I'm feeling good now, but about an hour ago I read on the internet this trend amongst "hard lymph nodes and malignancies," which sent my spiraling into an anxiety attack unlike one I've ever had. I went for a walk, and have since calmed down at a physical level, but my brain is still racing.
I really hate hypochondria, I'm sure alot of you identify and I don't need to whine or explain what that feels like. Everyone I've talked to (who is getting tired of hearing me talk all paranoid-like) assures me "Oh, I get those all the time" or "Oh, I had those when I had a cold," or "oh it's probably a cyst."
Well it's hard, doesn't really move, and typing those symptoms into the internet is the worst thing I could have done. I'm kind of past the freak out, but certainly not out of the woods worry-wise. Anything anybody's got in terms of advice, experience, etc., would be much appreciated.
Thanks.
New to the forums, but I've perused for awhile and love how helpful everyone is. Had some worrisome problems lately, was just looking for some helpful advice. Let me give you a brief rundown.
Fall 2006, I contracted mono. Didn't really have a tough go of it, but for no apparent reason in April 2007, I became a raging hypochondriac (nighttime bloating led me to be convinced I had stomach cancer, which was just ridiculous). By June of that year I was JUST starting to kick the tendency when my father was diagnosed with a stage IV glioblastoma in his brain, essentially shattering the lives of a lot of people I love. Cancer suddenly became a very real thing. Cards couldn't have fallen more perfectly to incite the hypochondria again.
Massive, constant anxiety and stress ever since.
In November I had somethign tantamount to a nervous breakdown at the end of one of the busiest weeks of my life: I was extremely fatigued, apathetic, and my brain was "twitching" (don't know how else to describe it, except that it felt like there were muscle spasms/electrical shocks rocketing through my brain ever 20 seconds). Got over that.
That was just some background, if it helps. Onto the current problem:
For all of March, had a weird "pressure/tension/full feeling/annoyance" primarily in my left ear (80/20 split, left and right). Then it became exclusively the left. Doc took a look, said she could see some fluid. Perscribed "Simply Saline," just a salt water spray. Used it for a couple weeks, and the pressure (while still flaring up occasionally) seems to be, for the most part better.
Then, two weeks ago tonight, was running my hand through my hair and found a small, hard lump on the back of my head. Obviously, a freak out ensued. It's fairly small, probably not even the size of the end of my finger, and it doesn't FEEL like it's gotten any bigger. Maybe a bit smaller. But then I'll feel it and I'll think "no, it's the same size."
So I'm feeling good now, but about an hour ago I read on the internet this trend amongst "hard lymph nodes and malignancies," which sent my spiraling into an anxiety attack unlike one I've ever had. I went for a walk, and have since calmed down at a physical level, but my brain is still racing.
I really hate hypochondria, I'm sure alot of you identify and I don't need to whine or explain what that feels like. Everyone I've talked to (who is getting tired of hearing me talk all paranoid-like) assures me "Oh, I get those all the time" or "Oh, I had those when I had a cold," or "oh it's probably a cyst."
Well it's hard, doesn't really move, and typing those symptoms into the internet is the worst thing I could have done. I'm kind of past the freak out, but certainly not out of the woods worry-wise. Anything anybody's got in terms of advice, experience, etc., would be much appreciated.
Thanks.