blackie
21-04-08, 20:12
Hi all
I am feeling really worried right now. I dont leave the house so havn't seen any of my friends for years. Now i am on my own for the week and a mate asked to come round. Well imidiatly i was like no way. But i said yes and thought i would have to try and it would be ok once she was here.
She came over and at first was really scary but we started talking like old times. But the more we talked the worse i began to feel. By the end i was just desperate for her to leave but she just kept talking and it took about 1/2 hr from the time we said its time to leave and acctually going. She wants to come back again and bring some of my other friends.
I found it really hard listning to her go on about all the normal things like uni, clubbing, buying her home and so on. I felt like i couldnt have any of that and feel like i could never enjoy it again even if i could. I now just feel really depressed and anxious. Her voice was just driving me insane, i couldnt hear what she was saying and the volume of the sound kept changing. It felt like a knife in my head and i just kept getting more and more panic. I am never going to have a normal life. I am never going to have the ability to enjoy anything.
I am feeling really worried right now. I dont leave the house so havn't seen any of my friends for years. Now i am on my own for the week and a mate asked to come round. Well imidiatly i was like no way. But i said yes and thought i would have to try and it would be ok once she was here.
She came over and at first was really scary but we started talking like old times. But the more we talked the worse i began to feel. By the end i was just desperate for her to leave but she just kept talking and it took about 1/2 hr from the time we said its time to leave and acctually going. She wants to come back again and bring some of my other friends.
I found it really hard listning to her go on about all the normal things like uni, clubbing, buying her home and so on. I felt like i couldnt have any of that and feel like i could never enjoy it again even if i could. I now just feel really depressed and anxious. Her voice was just driving me insane, i couldnt hear what she was saying and the volume of the sound kept changing. It felt like a knife in my head and i just kept getting more and more panic. I am never going to have a normal life. I am never going to have the ability to enjoy anything.