Been so bad since my baby was stillborn

[nikkixx]

Hi everyone

I don't post on here very often but just wanted some reassurance that I will be ok one day!

In December 2006 our much wanted baby girl was stillborn at 38 weeks. To say we were devasted is an understatement. :weep: I then had a miscarriage in July last year (they found out the baby didn't have a heartbeat at the 12 week scan) and since then I've been so anxious about everything. I have suffered from anxiety/depression/health anxiety for years but I seem to be getting worse again now. I've had lots of palpations/extra beats etc and am always convinced I've got MS, stroke, heart attack - the list goes on. I am 39 now and would love to have another baby but as I've got PCOS I don't hold much hope.

Do you think I will ever be calmer again - I seemed to have got a lot better but have now gone back to square one.

Thanks for reading xx

Nikki xx

[Alisonj]

I am so incredibly sorry for your losses. I cant even imagine the amount of grief. Have you been to a loss support group or something like that? I wonder if maybe going to something like that will help you deal with the pain and then maybe things with the anxiety etc will get better. Basically you have almost a Post tramatic stress issue. You will be calm again, it may take time as it does for all of us. But each day is a new one and a chance to heal and make better. If you stumble we will be here to pick you up.
Tons and tons of hugs going out to you.

[Oceanblue]

I'm deeply sorry to hear about the loss of your little angels.

I've never been through a trauma like this and I could never imagine the heartbreak it must cause.

But, different circumstances, I am suffering with PTSD, grief related.

I've been told that time is the best healer, though talking therapies are supposed to help a great deal combined. Have you ever been offered any type of counselling by your GP?

Also, as Alison has already mentioned, have you ever joined a StillBirth Support Group, these may help you.

We're here to support you too.

Take good care xx:flowers:

[Emira7]

Hey Nikki

Firstly hugs, and I am deeply sorry for your losses. Its great you have come on here and talked about it.

Have you had any formal counselling at all, or anything like that?

Please keep us posted hunny

Em
x

[Angel64]

Hi, when words are not enough, hope a big hug will help :bighug1:

Christine xx :flowers:

[dawny]

:bighug1: hey nikki,

i just wanted to send you a hug and to let you know we are here to support your through your terrible loss.

time is a great healer, i know at the momment they will feel like empty words.

keep strong
take care

dawny:bighug1:

[beth]

What words could i ever say to even start to say how sad it was to read your thread..


I believe that if you want something so much it will happen..

i too thought that i would never have another child after the loss of my 1st child and numerous misscariages but i now have 3 beautiful boys... Please please never give up faith becuase 1 day you will be a mummy again and your child or children will be clearly blessed to have such a strong person who will love them so much..you are clearly an insperation to us all that you have been able to talk to us


Keep your faith and may god bless you and your little angels

Sending you a hug

:hugs: Beth xx

[nikkixx]

Thank you all so so much for your lovely replies to my post.

It really means alot to me to know you all care :hugs:

Love Nikki xx

[Southern_Belle]

Nikki,

Your losses I can't imagine, your strength is amazing and I believe there is always hope. Hope that tomorrow will bring a day without anxiety or a racing heart, etc., and the most important that your dream will come true again. I pray that all your dreams come true. We will all be here if you have a bad day and to rejoice when you have great ones.

Love,

Laura